Taking things personally.

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  • JennMarieFitz
    JennMarieFitz Posts: 73 Member
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    A lot of you are assuming I'm just sitting around eating ice cream and crying about it. I HAVE started working out again, and I've been eating better, like I was. I've "gotten off my *kitten*". I'm just insecure about myself now. All in all, there was ONE week that I didn't work out, so I didn't think it would do much damage, since I had serious jet lag and a one year old who also had the same problem. I am upset and wanted to know if it is an overreaction to feel this way. Sometimes, women need to vent and get things out.
  • sizzle92
    sizzle92 Posts: 1,015 Member
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    Vent away OP! And go tell your man he needs a sammich.....or 4. :flowerforyou:
  • abrewer563
    abrewer563 Posts: 122
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    Honestly, I would be hurt too. My finace will make comments about me not going to the gym or eating stuff and I feel completely uncomfortable when he does it because I feel less attractive in his eyes. Then again sometimes you have to take what men say at face value and realize they aren't always the best with words. Focus on yourself and your goals :) I'm sure he will love you no matter what.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    A lot of you are assuming I'm just sitting around eating ice cream and crying about it. I HAVE started working out again, and I've been eating better, like I was. I've "gotten off my *kitten*". I'm just insecure about myself now. All in all, there was ONE week that I didn't work out, so I didn't think it would do much damage, since I had serious jet lag and a one year old who also had the same problem. I am upset and wanted to know if it is an overreaction to feel this way. Sometimes, women need to vent and get things out.

    So what he said was a little insensitive and unnecessary. You probably didn't gain any real weight and were just a little bloated. However, this does not mean he doesn't find you attractive. He loves you. He's your husband. I'd hope his attraction goes a LOT deeper than a little bit of bloating. Sit him down, tell him your feelings were hurt. Tell him he's not allowed to comment on your weight unless you gain like 50lbs. Tell him you NEED frequent affirmations of the fat that he IS attracted to you (I still tell my husband of 8 years this, he does good for a few weeks then needs reminded again). Open communication is very important in a marriage.
  • j_wilson2012
    j_wilson2012 Posts: 293
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    And you're so old and wise at 26.
  • j_wilson2012
    j_wilson2012 Posts: 293
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    Smart enough to stay away from women like this.
  • fcp1234
    fcp1234 Posts: 1,098 Member
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    You either havent been together long or you are being away too sensitive.

    Yes, he could have found better ways to say the same thing, but he wasnt calling you fat.
  • sizzle92
    sizzle92 Posts: 1,015 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Yes, I am quite sure the woman you choose will neeeeverrrr get her feelings hurt. Good luck to YOU!
  • sizzle92
    sizzle92 Posts: 1,015 Member
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    Smart enough to stay away from women like this.

    I meant to quote this in my last post^^^
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Yes, I am quite sure the woman you choose will neeeeverrrr get her feelings hurt. Good luck to YOU!

    Seriously. I'm a pretty thick skinned person and even I get my feelings hurt by insensitive things my husband says every now and then.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    Im sorry :( I dont think that being mean was his intention, or that he finds you unattractive. But I understand how you feel completely. I think that he probably meant well just didnt use the most tactful words. I was try not to worry about it so much and realize that in his way he was truly trying to help and be honest. Good luck!
  • sizzle92
    sizzle92 Posts: 1,015 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Yes, I am quite sure the woman you choose will neeeeverrrr get her feelings hurt. Good luck to YOU!

    Seriously. I'm a pretty thick skinned person and even I get my feelings hurt by insensitive things my husband says every now and then.

    Exactly. He is very young...he will learn. ;) Likely the hard way with that thinking process, but eh.
  • runningfromzombies
    runningfromzombies Posts: 386 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Is there really any call for making a personal attack on the OP's lifestyle choices? It's very impolite.
  • j_wilson2012
    j_wilson2012 Posts: 293
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Yes, I am quite sure the woman you choose will neeeeverrrr get her feelings hurt. Good luck to YOU!

    Seriously. I'm a pretty thick skinned person and even I get my feelings hurt by insensitive things my husband says every now and then.

    Okay, if he started calling you a fat *kitten*, a good for nothin slob, a B**** or what have you, yeah, you have reason to be upset. But, "rounder"? eesh.
  • tismyhardbody
    tismyhardbody Posts: 100 Member
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    You are under 124 and have a baby and are working towards 118? Is that right?
    Yea, something is off there and it isn't you.

    IMO he should have kept this to himself. Its not like you are extremely over weight. Its just rude to make comments to somebody who is putting forth effort to change themselves. Its a process, not an overnight thing. Life happens and nobody is perfect. You work for what you want and you shouldn’t have to hear *kitten* from people around you on what you are or aren't doing.
  • tismyhardbody
    tismyhardbody Posts: 100 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Sounds like she has a lot more maturity than you.
  • ravenrxx
    ravenrxx Posts: 455 Member
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    ..The Truth Hurts....Be the Deevah You R. And Eat Healthy..And Exercise. =) U got Dis.
  • j_wilson2012
    j_wilson2012 Posts: 293
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Sounds like she has a lot more maturity than you.

    Look, all I am sayin, is you wanna know why guys dont wanna get married? This is it. This entire post. A lot of women fret over everything that comes out of a guy's mouth, and make our lives miserable for it. There is some upside to marriage, but if it all fails, the guys life gets rung through the ringer, and sent to the crapper. And this is why it wont last. My maturity has nothing to do with it.
  • sizzle92
    sizzle92 Posts: 1,015 Member
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    Lol.....only 20, and already married with a kid. Planned, I am sure. You got a lot of growin up to do if you expect this marriage to last. I'm just sayin. Good luck!

    Yes, I am quite sure the woman you choose will neeeeverrrr get her feelings hurt. Good luck to YOU!

    Seriously. I'm a pretty thick skinned person and even I get my feelings hurt by insensitive things my husband says every now and then.

    Okay, if he started calling you a fat *kitten*, a good for nothin slob, a B**** or what have you, yeah, you have reason to be upset. But, "rounder"? eesh.

    OMG I wish you luck. You are gonna really need it.

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