Sixers: The Resolution Revolution WK 2

Phoenix_Rising

Thanks Verda! :flowerforyou:

Just be willing to think of solutions, and be open to listening and hope and pray that your ex is doing the same. Mediation can do wonderful things, if you've got a good mediator and both people involved want to work something out. There are so many more options in mediation that what a judge can order, so I'm really hoping that both of you are in a good place mentally to get some productive work done today. It's really empowering to decide what you want your visitation schedules to look like, instead of having a judge (who knows your case, but doesn't know every detail of your life) do the deciding for you. GOOD LUCK! I will send good mediation vibes your way!

It went awful. The mediator was hostile towards me, combative at points, missing that the focus is on my daughter's best interest. I cried the last 15 minutes. Nothing has changed, my ex is still the same.... which is a great reminder that I did the right thing in leaving him. He can't put Kiddo's best interest first; he is too self-serving and vindictive. Such is life. I will continue forward, fighting for my daughter.

Thanks for thinking of me guys.... I know I've been MIA from the Sixers lately. I have so much going on.... I feel like I should explode any day now, but I keep trudging along. My little girl keeps me moving forward.

emmie110

It went awful. The mediator was hostile towards me, combative at points, missing that the focus is on my daughter's best interest. I cried the last 15 minutes. Nothing has changed, my ex is still the same.... which is a great reminder that I did the right thing in leaving him. He can't put Kiddo's best interest first; he is too self-serving and vindictive. Such is life. I will continue forward, fighting for my daughter.

Thanks for thinking of me guys.... I know I've been MIA from the Sixers lately. I have so much going on.... I feel like I should explode any day now, but I keep trudging along. My little girl keeps me moving forward.

Lauryn - I'm so sorry you are going through this. It must be so terrible. I thought a mediator was supposed to be neutral and calm. Can you ask for a different mediator? You just keep reminding them that the only thing that matters here is what is best for your daughter. How can they argue with that?! Hang in there - one day this will all be behind you.

Phoenix_Rising

It went awful. The mediator was hostile towards me, combative at points, missing that the focus is on my daughter's best interest. I cried the last 15 minutes. Nothing has changed, my ex is still the same.... which is a great reminder that I did the right thing in leaving him. He can't put Kiddo's best interest first; he is too self-serving and vindictive. Such is life. I will continue forward, fighting for my daughter.

Thanks for thinking of me guys.... I know I've been MIA from the Sixers lately. I have so much going on.... I feel like I should explode any day now, but I keep trudging along. My little girl keeps me moving forward.

Lauryn - I'm so sorry you are going through this. It must be so terrible. I thought a mediator was supposed to be neutral and calm. Can you ask for a different mediator? You just keep reminding them that the only thing that matters here is what is best for your daughter. How can they argue with that?! Hang in there - one day this will all be behind you.

I find it WILDLY amusing that in this fairly large, densely populated county, there is only ONE mediator. I think I should ask for his credentials. He was awful. I've dealt with many psychologists and psychiatrist since the split to help put myself (and my daughter) back together. They are unbiased -- and I take unbiased, constructive criticism/advice well. This guy was a biased jerk and useless. In my opinion, if you cannot perform such an important role in the way it should be done, then get out of the job and let someone else handle it.

ali258

It went awful. The mediator was hostile towards me, combative at points, missing that the focus is on my daughter's best interest. I cried the last 15 minutes. Nothing has changed, my ex is still the same.... which is a great reminder that I did the right thing in leaving him. He can't put Kiddo's best interest first; he is too self-serving and vindictive. Such is life. I will continue forward, fighting for my daughter.

Thanks for thinking of me guys.... I know I've been MIA from the Sixers lately. I have so much going on.... I feel like I should explode any day now, but I keep trudging along. My little girl keeps me moving forward.

Lauryn - I'm so sorry you are going through this. It must be so terrible. I thought a mediator was supposed to be neutral and calm. Can you ask for a different mediator? You just keep reminding them that the only thing that matters here is what is best for your daughter. How can they argue with that?! Hang in there - one day this will all be behind you.

I find it WILDLY amusing that in this fairly large, densely populated county, there is only ONE mediator. I think I should ask for his credentials. He was awful. I've dealt with many psychologists and psychiatrist since the split to help put myself (and my daughter) back together. They are unbiased -- and I take unbiased, constructive criticism/advice well. This guy was a biased jerk and useless. In my opinion, if you cannot perform such an important role in the way it should be done, then get out of the job and let someone else handle it.

Lauryn,

Here's the website to search for mediators in NC: http://www1.aoc.state.nc.us/mediatorpublic/mediator/search/display.do?actionButton=Search&programSelection=M

Edited to add: That first link is just for names. Here is another link where you can search by city and county: http://mediator.comp.state.nc.us/default.htm

I took Mediation my last semester of law school, and my mediation professor is a mediator and I know she will drive quite a long distance for mediation. Of course, it's more expensive if she has to drive, but to get a good mediator, it might be worth it to pay a little extra. I'm sorry that you had such a bad mediation experience - a good mediator should strive to bring out the best in your ex and do his or her best to figure out how to make your ex see that the real focus should be your daughter.

drtamm

Lauryn- I'm praying for good results. Even in the mist of trouble we can find something to smile about. I know you will be ok. I wish you the best. I know your a great Mom!!!

Cathy- The day went well after the workout. I let my friend watch my dog Dylan for a few days, bc she doesn't have a dog and I miss him dearly. How are you doing?

Emmie- Busy is sooo true. Enjoy your holidays!

Nicole- its ok. Easy mix up. Glad to see you still with the group! YAY

Ali- Glad you could help Lauryn. Hope things are going great for you!

Hi all other sixers!!!

I'm not feeling well today. I was coughing a little through the night so I rested in bed until 10am but then I felt worse after eating so I was in bed until 430 I think. Trying to give my body what its asking for... rest. I'm so anti medicine.... so hopefully this will be just a 24 hr bug or something.



Take care
Tamm

drtamm

it posted twice. Sorry!

vhuber

Get well Tamm!!! And to you other SIXERS thanks for being here!!!
Verda

pdxmomof2

Cathy(chipper)....................SW 240.4 lbs / GW 235 lbs / CW 242.6 lbs / PROGRESS +2.2 lb
Verda(vhuber),,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,SW 148.0 lbs / GW 145 lbs / CW 149.0 lbs / PROGRESS +1 lb
AmyLou (amylou24)...........SW 152.2 lbs / GW 147.0 lbs / CW 149.0 lbs / PROGRESS - 3.2 lbs
Kristin (kistinbee)................SW 190.5 lbs/ GW 185.0 lbs/ CW 187.5 lbs/ PROGRESS - 3.0 lbs
Melanie(mello) ...................SW 288.0 lbs / GW 273.0 lbs / CW 285.0 lbs / PROGRESS -3.0lbs
Lauryn (Phoenix_Rising)...SW 153.4 lbs / GW 148.0 lbs / CW 153.4 lbs / PROGRESS +/-0.0 lb
Maggie (magglett) .............SW 175.0 lbs / GW 170.0 lbs / CW 177.5 lbs / PROGRESS +2.5 lbs
Kelly(redneckwoman).......SW 157.0 lbs / GW 151.0 lbs / CW 157.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/-0.0lbs
Tammara (drtamm)...........SW 194.5 lbs / GW 190.0 lbs / CW 196.0 lbs / PROGRESS + 1.5 lbs
Tiff (gonabfit).......................SW 146.4 lbs / GW 135.0 lbs / CW 146.4 lbs / PROGRESS 0 lbs TOM not weighing
Lorna (iftcheiaf)...................SW 142.2 lbs / GW 137.2 lbs / CW 142.2.6 lbs / PROGRESS -0.2 lbs
Emmie (emmie110)..........SW 218.0 lbs / GW 209.0 lbs / CW 218.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/-0.0 lbs
Amy (pdxmomof2)...............SW 197.0 lbs/ GW 189.00 lbs/ CW 199.8 lbs/ PROGRESS +2.8 lbs

T (datenshi) ........................SW 192.8 lbs / GW 181.0 lbs / CW 192.8 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lbs
Alison (ali258).....................SW 225.5 lbs / GW 215.5 lbs / CW 225.5 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lb
Rhonda (rmchan)...............SW 189.0 lbs/ GW 179.0 lbs/ CW 189.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lbs
Nicole (nicolee516)............SW 172.4 lbs / GW 168.0 lbs / CW 172.4 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lbs
Amy (amypyr) ......................SW 156.0 lbs / GW 150.0 lbs / CW 156.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lbs
Niky (niky1215)....................SW 162.0 Ibs/ GW 155.0 Ibs/ CW 162.0 Ilbs/PROGRESS +/- lbs
AmyLou (amylou24)...........SW 152.2 lbs / GW 147.0 lbs / CW 152.2 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lbs
Jennifer (candycaneps)... SW 142.0 lbs / GW 135.0 lbs / CW 138.6 lbs / PROGRESS - 0lbs
Margaret (elephantmeg) ..SW 128.0 lbs / GW 123.0 lbs / CW 125. lbs / PROGRESS -3 lbs
Tammy (TERVIN) ...............SW 241.0 lbs / GW 229.0 lbs / CW 236.0 lbs / PROGRESS -5 lbs
Susan (slightingscale).......SW 158.8 lbs / GW 150.0 lbs / CW 153.2 lbs / PROGRESS -5.6 lbs
Jennifer (candycaneps)... SW 142.0 lbs / GW 135.0 lbs / CW 139.0 lbs / PROGRESS - 3lbs
Margaret (elephantmeg) ..SW 128.0 lbs / GW 123.0 lbs / CW 124.5 lbs / PROGRESS -3.5 lbs
B (Its_B)................................SW 220.0 lbs / GW 180.0 lbs / CW 204.0 lbs / PROGRESS -3.0 lbs
Erin(gogoleaner).................SW 161.0 lbs / GW 155.0 lbs / CW 159.8 lbs / PROGRESS -1.2 lbs
Jessica (raincloud)............SW 222.0 lbs / GW 210.0 lbs / CW 218.8 lbs / PROGRESS -3.2 lbs
Nicole(Colie) ......................SW 212.0 lbs / GW 200.0 lbs / CW 206.0 lbs / PROGRESS -6 lbs
Jenn (fairy28).......................SW 212.0 lbs / GW 200.0 lbs / CW 211.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/-0 lbs
Sandy ...................................SW 234.5 lbs / GW 225.0 lbs / CW 234.5 lbs / PROGRESS 0 lbs
Patti (pattitricia85)...............SW 150.0 lbs / GW 144.0 lbs / CW 145.0 lbs / PROGRESS -5.0 lbs
Jenn (fairy28).......................SW 212.0 lbs / GW 200.0 lbs / CW 211.0 lbs / PROGRESS -2 lb
Shanell (nellienell12) .......SW 220.0 lbs / GW 215.0 lbs / CW 219.5 lbs / PROGRESS -0.5 lbs
Marci (mdogg09)................SW 305.0 lbs / GW 263.0 lbs / CW 274.0 lbs / PROGRESS -1 lb
Tami (tigersgirl)..................SW 231.0 lbs / GW 215.0 lbs / CW 231.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lbs
Brady(bradybrookes).........SW 185.0 lbs / GW 155.0 lbs / CW 185.0 lbs / PROGRESS +/- lb

OK.....Me and the scale are not getting along at all. It is going in the wrong direction! :noway: ( I would like to say its a surprise but, its not!) Too much birthday celebrating!

Well, I got my blood test results back. I am still bordering on severely anemic. I just cant kick this anemia. I am on a higher dose of iron for 2 months and then recheck. Good news is that ALL of my other blood tests came back wonderful. I am lucky I guess because with all this weight I keep expecting high cholesterol, etc. Nope:drinker: The iron pills are going to mess with my tummy and make me constipated(sorry for the TMI, any of you having to take iron supplements knows this all too well!:embarassed: )So this chapter of my life seems to continue on and on!

I am so glad that most of you are seeing great loses during the holidays! I commend you! I wont ask how because I know...your eating well and working out. :grumble: Not sure why it is so hard but it is!

gonabfit

:blushing: Thanks to Verda, Chipper, and Tamm! Today that doctor met with me privately and attempted to lend a kind hand and encourage me. That was nice, and I appreciated it. but..... I am just living for TOMORROW because I definitely need a break from all the stress of school :-) today was better than yesterday because quite honeslty I felt like giving up on it all. :-/ I'm irritable, tired, and just want to be left alone! LOL!!! Thanks TOM! LOL :laugh: :laugh: :explode: :bigsmile: ( I knew I wouldn't but MAN sometimes I wonder why I put myself through all this. When I look back in a few years, this small event won't even matter though).

Lauryn I'm sorry you are going through so much. That sucks. Your mediator probably has some severe issues of his/.her own and apparently is transfering them to you for some reason. i will pray for you :-) I'm sure it will work out in your favor!

I just did Taebo and it felt good to sweat and do something good for my body. I'm off to study before bed. Oh my dinner was healthy today! YAY! grapes, a baked porkchop, and a salad that was SO tasty!

gonabfit

:blushing: Thanks to Verda, Chipper, and Tamm! Today that doctor met with me privately and attempted to lend a kind hand and encourage me. That was nice, and I appreciated it. but..... I am just living for TOMORROW because I definitely need a break from all the stress of school :-) today was better than yesterday because quite honeslty I felt like giving up on it all. :-/ I'm irritable, tired, and just want to be left alone! LOL!!! Thanks TOM! LOL :laugh: :laugh: :explode: :bigsmile:

Lauryn I'm sorry you are going through so much. That sucks. Your mediator probably has some severe issues of his/.her own and apparently is transfering them to you for some reason. i will pray for you :-) I'm sure it will work out in your favor!

I just did Taebo and it felt good to sweat and do something good for my body. I'm off to study before bed. Oh my dinner was healthy today! YAY! grapes, a baked porkchop, and a salad that was SO tasty!

To my other sixers... I am wishing each of you the best in life, today tomorrow and always! Life is tough... but WE are tougher! Thanks for being there when I needed you :-D

vhuber

pdxmomof2,
I want you to know that I know what you are going through. I all of sudden became anemic and found out when I went to give blood, they told me to see my Dr. right away, I had to do stool checks to see if I was losing blood but no so then I tried iron pills and iron rich food! Nothing brought it up so I went and had an iron infusion which took a good share of a day! It has been three years and so far all my test's have been good! We do not know why this all happened but things are good now!
Verda

pdxmomof2

pdxmomof2,
I want you to know that I know what you are going through. I all of sudden became anemic and found out when I went to give blood, they told me to see my Dr. right away, I had to do stool checks to see if I was losing blood but no so then I tried iron pills and iron rich food! Nothing brought it up so I went and had an iron infusion which took a good share of a day! It has been three years and so far all my test's have been good! We do not know why this all happened but things are good now!
Verda

I have been dealing with it since feb and nothing is working. I had to see my gyn to get a pelvic ultrasound. I have also had a colonoscopy and an endoscopy too. All to check for internal bleeding I have been placed on an iron rich birth control pill too. The next step will be the transfusion. I was offered it back in July but I felt like my doc was just washing her hands of me at the time as she was tired of dealing. I am with a new doc now and go back in 2 months. If she suggests the iron transfusion too then I think I will go for it for sure. Thanks for sharing!

chipper15173

mornin....((grumble, grumble))

DH leaft here at 5 this morning so got to stay in bed and just veg. until the puppy needed to go out. so had to get up. my sugars have been high in the morning lately. see what the A1C shows next week. i'll know wed. if high again up goes the meds and change the diet again. rain today so probably no roofers again. they are almost done. i told the landlord yesterday i really would like this done by Christmas. That might be pushing it now i think.

body is just plain tired today. thinking it might be an excuse so just doing an at home workout. wanting to try something new on exercise on demand. maybe a dance.

tamm....sure hope you are feeling better today.
tiff....mood swings ((grumble, grumble))
lauryn....((hugs))
ali....hows the new job?
pdx....so much fun with medical problem. our lives would be boring without them.
verda...you look so good in you av pic. i am envious
hope everyone else is doing good.

later

Phoenix_Rising

Tiff, so sorry to hear work is rough. Coworkers make all the difference in whether or not you can stand a job. I hope that improves!

Tamm, you are such a beautiful person, inside and out!!

Nicole, better late than never girl!! Keep finding us! lol

Cathy, are the roofers done yet?

Kristin, you amaze me, SuperMom!

Emmie, only that one mediator exists in my large county. What a joke. I'll be handling that situation though. Formal grievances are in order. I should never have been subjected to that, nor should any other parent in the future that he comes in contact with.

Ali, thanks so much for that link. We are pursuing custody with our respective attorneys now. It's no big deal -- I knew EO wouldn't be agreeable to anything good for my daughter, so I knew we'd wind up in court from the beginning. I'm not scared of court -- the truth will come out. I know court probably scares him!!

Tamm, are you feeling better sweetie? Hope it was a little bug that went away quickly!

Verda, thanks again for the kind words. The support I get from my Sixers and other MFP friends has been SUCH a huge part of my recovery from my horrible marriage. I love this group, I love this website!!!

Amy, :frown:. You poor thing. I so hope they can figure out the iron thing!! I can't imagine you have ANY energy. I was anemic for a brief period during a depression. That combo left me with barely the strength to get out of bed in the mornings, and that was when I was single! I can't imagine having a family to take care of. I'm thinking of you, dear!

Tiff, I hope you enjoy these few days off! I am glad to hear you get a break! Your work/life schedule boggles my mind. I don't know how you do it. You are so strong!!

Cathy, Imma come down there and take care of those roofers myself . UGH!!!! And thanks for the hugs :smooched:

Phoenix_Rising

I have to share this story. I posted it in another thread, so you may see it twice... maybe not.... worth reading!!!

I have been listening on the drive to work and now at my desk to my favorite local radio station who does an annual "Breaking and Entering Christmas", where they select one family (from emails sent to them) who is in great need and tragic circumstances, and they go into their house and fill it with gifts and needs.

It is beautiful. I have tears of joy.

We had a local firefighter who died suddenly at his home. He left behind a wife of ten years, a daughter (maybe 8), a son (maybe 3 or 4), and a baby on the way. Being a firefighter, their family had little money and were in great need. Their porch was falling apart, so badly that when the EMS carried out the husband from the home, the porch broke below their feet. The mother lost the baby she was pregnant with. The van broke down and the dryer stopped working within a matter of days. Their tv just blew. Unimaginable tragedy and stress for that family.

So far, I've heard the kids opening their gifts -- every single item that family and friends said the kids wanted. Mom opened gifts of pots & pans for the kitchen, a brand new washer and dryer, a brand new tv. The kids just saw the brand new playhouse in the backyard. They are still holding a "special envelope" for Mom. I have no idea what they gave them while I was walking from my parking deck to my desk.

It's beautiful.

I had to share. Makes me appreciate how GOOD my life is.

And yes, I'll be updating with what they give Mom. I'm so excited I could just squeal!


RADIO UPDATE: $1000 gift card to Lowe's for home repairs, the husband's firefighter friends are going to repair the house. $500 to Walmart for groceries or whatever. $1000 to Kohls for clothes or whatever. AND a getaway to Walt Disney World!!!! All expenses paid !!!!!!!! $500 in additional money to spend at Disney!!!! (I am so ready to cry tears of joy!) $250 to Let's Dish, where you go to make meals and cook them later at home.

vhuber

I have to share this story. I posted it in another thread, so you may see it twice... maybe not.... worth reading!!!

I have been listening on the drive to work and now at my desk to my favorite local radio station who does an annual "Breaking and Entering Christmas", where they select one family (from emails sent to them) who is in great need and tragic circumstances, and they go into their house and fill it with gifts and needs.

It is beautiful. I have tears of joy.

We had a local firefighter who died suddenly at his home. He left behind a wife of ten years, a daughter (maybe 8), a son (maybe 3 or 4), and a baby on the way. Being a firefighter, their family had little money and were in great need. Their porch was falling apart, so badly that when the EMS carried out the husband from the home, the porch broke below their feet. The mother lost the baby she was pregnant with. The van broke down and the dryer stopped working within a matter of days. Their tv just blew. Unimaginable tragedy and stress for that family.

So far, I've heard the kids opening their gifts -- every single item that family and friends said the kids wanted. Mom opened gifts of pots & pans for the kitchen, a brand new washer and dryer, a brand new tv. The kids just saw the brand new playhouse in the backyard. They are still holding a "special envelope" for Mom. I have no idea what they gave them while I was walking from my parking deck to my desk.

It's beautiful.

I had to share. Makes me appreciate how GOOD my life is.

And yes, I'll be updating with what they give Mom. I'm so excited I could just squeal!


RADIO UPDATE: $1000 gift card to Lowe's for home repairs, the husband's firefighter friends are going to repair the house. $500 to Walmart for groceries or whatever. $1000 to Kohls for clothes or whatever. AND a getaway to Walt Disney World!!!! All expenses paid !!!!!!!! $500 in additional money to spend at Disney!!!! (I am so ready to cry tears of joy!) $250 to Let's Dish, where you go to make meals and cook them later at home.

Thanks Lauryn for sharing!! It's always so nice to read these stories and to really see that there are still kind and generous people in the world!! Hugs to ya and have a nice weekend!
verda

drtamm

Great Story Lauryn!!!! Its always great to hear about the good in people!

Lauryn- I think you are beautiful inside and out too!!! Thanks for the lovely compliment.

Verda- did you try to make the fudge. Hows this week been for you

Cathy- Glad to see you still kicking and posting after all the crazy stuff for the last few weeks. You are strong!! Keep on fighting!

Well Sixers!! It was just a 24 hr bug and I rested two days to make sure it was gone. I believe it is. I got my car repaired today $400 but a necessary investment, I needed a radiator, but I did get a coupon on line that saved me thirty dollars. I'm like a coupon crazy lady. I love love a bargain!!!

I'm so glad to have you ladies. Even if its just once a week I hear from you, I appreciate your presence. Your desire to do better for yourself and your ability to help others. I couldn't have known I would get this much when I signed up for the SIXERS.

I went bowling tonight, after like a two year break. Off to repair some broken nails. LOL. Oh and I have a job interview on Mon and Tues next week. I'm visiting a community health center that needs a dentist. Its a small town in Va. about 4 hrs from where I am now and its opening in Jan. I'm the first dentist to interview for the site so they seem excited. I'm excited too, its a new community health site so I'm sure it will have its share of new problems but atleast there are no existing issues. YAY!!!

I hope everyone is doing well. Lets be happy!!! YAY we are coming close to a new year!!!

Take care,
Tamm

chipper15173

oh, tamm for some reason i get the feeling that this new job was meant for you. what fun something new, and you will be apart of it. you can help mold it. i too am a coupon queen. i just got chex mix for .25 and betty crocker potatoes, evop milk, for free.

well, designing my business cards. so need to get it done.

stay warm

later

Phoenix_Rising

Tamm, I think the dental job sounds great! Where in VA? You can PM me that info, if you like.

Cathy, congrats on designing business cards! Such an exciting move forward! Woohoo!

Me and the Kiddo went sledding yesterday in the snow. We had the BEST time!!! :bigsmile:

Redneckwoman

OMG Lauryn Look at the two of you!!! What a great time the two of you are having. Your smiles are so priceless. :flowerforyou:
Hope all is well with you. Miss talking with you.

Kel