Partner hates me using MFP :(
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Definitely don't stop using MFP because he doesn't like it. Make it clear to him that this is something that you're doing for yourself, and that is helping you. As your partner he should encourage you in your goals, and something as simple as using a website to track your food isn't a big deal.
But at the same time, if it's cutting into your time with him or friends or family, you have to acknowledge that. When you and him are having dinner together, are you using your phone to log your food right then and there? Is it interrupting actual face to face interaction? Because I could understand why that's frustrating to him. (Although if it's not interfering with his life or your time with him in any way then he's the one with a problem).0 -
I cannot believe all the assumptions the partner is a he........a partner can mean a lot of things. Talk to your partner and explain the concept behind logging and the accountability that follows. Maybe even try to involve your partner.....not for weight control but for nutrition balance. This is a healthy obsession
and a road to a new awakening on health and well being. Good luck! 0 -
I agree!What you'll find is that the more you get used to knowing how many cals are in each thing, the less meticulous you'll become in logging because you'll be quite good at estimating how much you've had.
At the beginning it's a bit intense tracking everything but I mellowed out and now track but don't obsess about food like I used too. There will be good days not so good days.
I don't agree with everyone using the word jealously here. You know yourself better than any of us, there are some ppl that perhaps should use another method of watching what they eat. I know I used to get way overboard over everything and it got pretty bad to the point eating anything made me feel guilty. As I said only you know what your eating habits are and if you're here for the right reasons. What do I mean by that? There are some on here that have suggested (by docs, nutritionists, counselors etc...who ever they have discussed this with) they no longer track every bite because it's harming them in negative way.
Check in with Funky Spunky she's shared a lot in regards to this during her time here. She started the site at 15 and is now 19 and has shared her story, it might be helpful to make contact with her to hear in her words how constant tracking effected her.
Before anyone jumps up waving their arms, this is example of how it effects some, but personally I don't believe it has to do with MFP itself in the slightest, but more how we handle things within using a site of any type.
If we come to this site looking to 'diet' our way to weight loss then it'll simply be just another diet of many. Using MFP as it's intended, a healthy way to track, share, learn nutrition etc., a person can meet goals and stay healthy.
These are simply my thoughts, when someone uses the word obsessive, it can mean nothing or it can be pretty serious issue, again, depending on the individual and their relationship with food.
Take care!:flowerforyou:
This is a very good point and why I posted above, it's hard to say what's truly going on in someone else's life from one post. Some are assuming he's jealous, some that he's controlling, needs to get lost etc. etc.She is 5'7" and 134 pounds, maybe he has reason to be concerned about her health. Remember we are hearing just one side of the debate.
It's getting a bit ridiculous since none of us know the reality of it but her and likely him to some extent. If you're here to maintain, go for it. But if you're looking to lose I can definitely see why he's concerned!0 -
I would be annoyed if my partner were logging stuff at the table or during our time together. I think you should set a time during the day that you get on here so that you don't get burnt out. Maybe try to include him in MFP or motivate him to create an account. I know you have found a new past time but maybe give him a little attention. He doesn't sound like a bad guy!!! I don't know where people get off saying that. He probably loves you and just needs a little extra attention. Hey, maybe he's a bit insecure. Maybe not. You can figure this one out on your own. I mean, posting about your problems with him on MFP is not going to help his problem with you spending too much time on here. Seems counter productive.0
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No!0
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Had to laugh at this. My wife immediately signed up for MFP when she saw me using it and does it alongside me. If anything she's even more obsessive about it than I am even though she has no weight to lose imo.
Sounds like you've just managed to find a real loser. I can't see myself ever having a reaction other than being 100% supportive
LIKE THIS!!!0 -
If we could eat normally & not get obsessive we would not need MFP!! If he wants you to be healthy & happy then he will cheer you on but make sure you are spending quality time with him & not getting into the chat rooms while he is around more than you have to.....0
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I'm staggered as to many of the responses on here! Essentially her partner has supported her weight loss and healthy lifestyle by suggesting she eats better and exercises - but thinks she is 'crazy' to log every single mint etc. Wow what a horrible person he must be!!!
So this guy has now been labelled a 'real loser'
HE has been called obsessive
She has been told to ditch him
She has been told to kick him out on the street
He has been told to mind his own business (his partners health and well being isn't his business???)
He has been labelled jealous and controlling
He has been called a douche
he has been called insecure
Many many others!
The other day my wife suggested that I was overdoing it down the gym - should I ditch her? She is trying to control me! She is such a loser! Oh man, maybe she's jealous of the girls down my gym! Hold on - what's it got to do with her anyway, she should mind her own damn business!0 -
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So strange that people get upset about these things. It isn't just the fact of logging, you are surrounded by alot of people on here struggling with the same things as you and so many people here to support you in your journey, how can that be a bad thing? lol I have never been as successful as I am now and I know alot of that has to do with having the support of this site.
I know when you start logging, you can be a little fanatical, I think alot of people are because you want to make sure you account for every calorie to ensure you are doing what you can to get to your goals. After a while, you will find you may tone down a bit. I used to make sure I logged everything right after I eat, and now i just try and make sure I get it all in, even if it is a day or so later. The accounability you place on yourself to do these things helps alot. Before I started MFP and logging on here, I was meticulous about logging, made my own log journals and wrote every little thing down. Did it for four months straight and started to struggle and I stopped logging and I fell off track. MFP got me back on track and back to logging all the time, but this time I'm not as anal about it. You will find an inbetween eventually. And like I said, I love this site more for the community then the logging. I love that I have friends that have some of the same medical issues and know my struggles and are here to support me, just as I am for them.
When you have had to lose weight on your own, you don't realize how much support actually makes a difference. And this support is free! Don't let your partner get you down, they may just feel left out and want more attention from you, so maybe they just need something to blame it on. Try explaining why it is so important for you to be on here and hopefully they will come around. You are doing this for you, to live healthy and to be that way for you AND your partner and in the end I am sure they will appreciate the new healthy you
Good luck and hang in there
This is SUCH a wonderful response!!! I seem to have a longer-than-expected learning curve with these chats, so I apologize to the person who wrote this.... for not listing your name with your response. But really, sound, solid, awesome advice here....0 -
And please ignore the people saying he is jealous or a douche or giving you a right to be selfish.
If you in a relationship and anything your doing is bothering your partner don't just dismiss it. Logging food and stressing about food can be very obsessive and stressful for both parties. Your always crunching numbers and on your phone or the computer day in and day out and the other person has experience that with you anytime food becomes an issue.
Like the other person that had a meltdown at her anniversary dinner because the menu at the restaurant changed. I'm sure that distressed her husband watching her have that reaction over food as it did her.
You have to learn to keep track but also be flexible. So if your being on MFP is taking time away from your partner or distressing them in terms of enjoying time with you, find a way to balance both out.
This is probably the best post in this thread. If she is diverging her attention from her relationship issues and is ignoring what he is saying then she doesn't really care what he has to say. I would hate having a partner that refuses to address relationship concerns.0 -
it's just really hard to see how much you really are eating unless u put it right out in front of you.
that being said, if u are jumping on here every time you take a bite and it's getting in the middle of your time with him, maybe u can just log at a specific time... pre-log what u know u are gonna eat and then wait til evening to log the rest. maybe the issue is that u are constantly online, which is just as irritating at someone being constantly on their phone or checking facebook every 5 seconds when u are trying to spend time with them0 -
And please ignore the people saying he is jealous or a douche or giving you a right to be selfish.
If you in a relationship and anything your doing is bothering your partner don't just dismiss it. Logging food and stressing about food can be very obsessive and stressful for both parties. Your always crunching numbers and on your phone or the computer day in and day out and the other person has experience that with you anytime food becomes an issue.
Like the other person that had a meltdown at her anniversary dinner because the menu at the restaurant changed. I'm sure that distressed her husband watching her have that reaction over food as it did her.
You have to learn to keep track but also be flexible. So if your being on MFP is taking time away from your partner or distressing them in terms of enjoying time with you, find a way to balance both out.
This is probably the best post in this thread. If she is diverging her attention from her relationship issues and is ignoring what he is saying then she doesn't really care what he has to say. I would hate having a partner that refuses to address relationship concerns.
So true
I also wouldn't want a partner who paid no interest in any of my passions/interests/hobbies/obsessions, and just let me get on with what I was doing without any input whatsoever. When I was at my MFP worst, I NEEDED my wife to say to me "Whoa! You're seriously going to log the Paracetamol that you have just taken!!!" (One calorie by the way)
It certainly IS her business what I am doing0 -
And please ignore the people saying he is jealous or a douche or giving you a right to be selfish.
If you in a relationship and anything your doing is bothering your partner don't just dismiss it. Logging food and stressing about food can be very obsessive and stressful for both parties. Your always crunching numbers and on your phone or the computer day in and day out and the other person has experience that with you anytime food becomes an issue.
Like the other person that had a meltdown at her anniversary dinner because the menu at the restaurant changed. I'm sure that distressed her husband watching her have that reaction over food as it did her.
You have to learn to keep track but also be flexible. So if your being on MFP is taking time away from your partner or distressing them in terms of enjoying time with you, find a way to balance both out.
This is probably the best post in this thread. If she is diverging her attention from her relationship issues and is ignoring what he is saying then she doesn't really care what he has to say. I would hate having a partner that refuses to address relationship concerns.
So true
I also wouldn't want a partner who paid no interest in any of my passions/interests/hobbies/obsessions, and just let me get on with what I was doing without any input whatsoever. When I was at my MFP worst, I NEEDED my wife to say to me "Whoa! You're seriously going to log the Paracetamol that you have just taken!!!" (One calorie by the way)
It certainly IS her business what I am doing
No doubt brother from the other side of the globe. Dieting should be a lifestyle rather than some type of pressure to get somewhere. Pressure to log things and all that obsession people have posted not only annoys people in this website but more likely it may affect others in their personal life. Some days I just don't log anything honestly cause I don't feel like it. I don't want to give my mind any unnecessary room to develop any dependence on meaningless logging. I eat the same *kitten* everyday so.0
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