I just want to give up.
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I too turned 40 this year and I threw away all my "skinny" clothes before summer started in momentary laps of reason I guess. I figured I was never going to be as thin as I was 20 or even 10 years ago- so buy new clothes and move on. I have a few new pieces to show for this decision.
Then - out of a pure desire to just feel better finally. To feel as I did when I did exercise regularly. To feel like I did when I could sleep and have energy over rid the desire to look good. I had given up on ever wearing cute clothes and settled in the idea I was 40 and that is that... but but but.. I did want to feel good and knew it was possible.
So I started "dieting"... and a friend told me about MFP. So I started choosing well because if I didnt numbers would turn red- and I wanted green. At first it was like a game. I like lots of fresh healthy foods so it wasnt hard for me to cook and enjoy lean meats, veggies and the like- it was just time consuming - or so I thought. Its not if I plan well, shop well and combine tasks in the kitchen. Also - its not expensive to eat right. Im thrilled at how far a bag of apples or cabbage goes, at how long a hearty bowl of cereal can keep me full, so I dont need more food in an hour.
2 months into MFP and I -for the first time in my life- truly understand that we -NONE OF US- can diet if we want to be healthy (or skinny) for life. We have to eat well every day. We have to fight demons and motivate ourselves. We have to make the choice minute by minute or meal by meal, day to day to do it for OURSELVES. I must do cardio every day- I dont even care if its the best fat burn out there- I love moving my body- going fast, jumping high, sweating. I want to get a more steady weight routine going because I know the results will be worth the effort. (I lift a lil - and I need to get serious)
Think about it- if you want to diet- it will suck, you may be happy with results - then backslide. You may have successes- but if you go back to bad ways- it wont stick and you will be sad again. I keep imagining myself eating at goal weight calories - knowing by then just how much is right. Feeling full and stopping because Im not eating for any of the wrong reasons any more. I can see the day where I am home in my skin and it is already falling in to place.
Eating well and exercising has given me back my confidence, my speed and ability to sleep better. My skin is clear, Im well rested and I am stronger and faster today then I was 2 months ago. I want to be the best I can be today though and I continue to see just how amazing that is. I feel like Ive come to a new path and its still somewhat unknown but I know I can navigate it and great things will be waiting for me as I go. Its become fun, not a chore and real close to just being what I do, without thought and logging.
I will always log (or so I say now) but I feel that way- because it works. I can check calories on any sight obviously- but here I can get every tool I need to stay accountable to myself and be the best ME I can be. I hope you find something to make it click for you. I know I didnt give advice on how to start- but I was trying to express how wonderful it is if you can just get that ball rolling. I went from "ah screw it" to " I can do this!!" in what feels like no time at all. I started "dieting" and went on to re-vamp my life!
Try it - please- for YOU! You're worth it!0 -
Hello, I have been on and off MFP for over a year now. I have logged in everyday for almost 70 days. I . But I just can't do this. I don't know how people are losing weight. I don't know how to motivate myself to eat healthy or exercise. I use to be 114lbs and was able to eat what ever I wanted to 2 1/2 years ago. Now I am climbing to 160. I have a Mexico trip coming up in 64 days and I turn 40 in 4 months. I want to get skinny again. I need some help. I love reading things from all my friends on here so more friends the better. But any suggesstions to help me get out of this funk?
one thing I notice about what you said is that though you have logged in every day for almost 70 days you "have for the most part tracked my foods for the last 2 weeks". For most people, to do this right, food has to be tracked strictly, not "for the most part", and consistently, for an extended period of time.
Maybe others have already said this and i missed their comments but, in your food tracking, are you weighing & measuring? or approximating? that can make a huge difference, too.
I see that your diary isn't open to the public, if you open it up, people may be able to give you advice on your choices.
you can do this! it just takes dedication and patience.0 -
i'll be honest.. you have to want it bad enough, you have to desire it enough to eat healthy and cut out all bad foods and exercise and stick with it and you need to be motivated to do it otherwise your not going to succeed ... you can give all the excuses oh i'll start tomorrow stop making excuses and just do it! it's not easy but if you really really want it you will do it
by saying I just want to give up you've already failed before you've even started and your attitude stinks !
Perfect.
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NEVER GIVE UP!0
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Lots of good support and advice has been given to you in this thread! How awesome is that?!
My 2 cents is this:
You have to really want it. Enough to do whatever it takes.
And don't ever quit. None of us does this perfectly, but those of us who are succeeding are still in the game. My favorite quote is a Japanese proverb "Fall down seven times. Stand up eight."
Just get on it girl! Forget waiting for motivation. Get after it and attack it like a junk yard dog!0 -
The most important thing to remember you are what you eat. It doesn't matter how much you exercise if you throw all the wrong foods down your throat you wont lose an oz. Try saying to yourself if I can't kill it or grow it, don't eat it. Keep away from the processed stuff it generally has no nutritional value. Once you start eating correctly your energy levels will increase and you will begin to want to exercise. I wish you all the best!0
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I wish I had not given up when I was about 30 lbs away from goal about 20 years ago. Now, I have to lose over 100 lbs to get to goal.
Do not seek perfection, you will only find disappointment. More important is to be determined, dedicated and persistent!
DO NOT EVER GIVE UP!!
You CAN do this! One day at a time!0 -
Hello, I have been on and off MFP for over a year now. I have logged in everyday for almost 70 days. I have for the most part tracked my foods for the last 2 weeks. But I just can't do this. I don't know how people are losing weight. I don't know how to motivate myself to eat healthy or exercise. I use to be 114lbs and was able to eat what ever I wanted to 2 1/2 years ago. Now I am climbing to 160. I have a Mexico trip coming up in 64 days and I turn 40 in 4 months. I want to get skinny again. I need some help. I love reading things from all my friends on here so more friends the better. But any suggesstions to help me get out of this funk?
I've been using MFP for almost 7 months. I first started with friends as a way to track each other while doing a 6 week fitness competition. I was doing boot camps, strength training and eating clean. I read a lot of different stuff and one of the boot camp coaches suggested a book which turns out really helped and made a lot of sense. It's "Female Body Breakthrough" by Rachel Cosgrove. Rachel is a former aerobics instructor and body builder. I found out later, that she's one of my main trainer's mentors. It has an eating program and a workout program that doesn't include running. Basically, I squatted, lifted, rowed, jumped my way through 25.5 lbs the first 6 weeks. After the competition, I couldn't keep up my double workouts but I kept working out 3-5 times a week and I've lost up to 52 lbs.
Unfortunately, I suddenly and unexpectedly lost my 41 year old sister and best friend in May . Thank heavens I'd started this journey. She was one of my biggest cheerleaders and was so proud of the success I was having, so I knew I needed to stick with it to make her proud of me. I knew it would be so easy to drown my sorrows in food and I had every excuse to stop working out. I did well until mid-July, but I've been stuck and need to get back to this.
I'm training for a half marathon, which I know from my trainer is completely not helping my weight loss. The Half Marathon was the goal I that started me on this journey three years ago. I was ready, got sick and then just couldn't seem to get back to it. Earlier this year, I started again and lost some weight, so I have to finish my half marathon goal and then get back to the weight loss and fitness. I wasn't expecting to lose my sister and get derailed this summer so I hit stall, but I have started back and hope to lose some more before the half marathon.
Food is a huge key! I realized I was eating not enough fat and the wrong kind of fats and way to much sugar. I was shocked at how much sugar was in "diet" foods. I had to learn all over what to eat. I have a friend who started MFP just from seeing me after 4 months and she lost 7 lbs in a month only by changing her eating and logging everything. Yes it's a pain, but it's worth it to get results. I know that others have said it's easier to do it now while you're younger. I have a couple friends going through menopause and they said do whatever you can to lose weight now because you'll gain at least 10 lbs and it shifts and it more stubborn to get rid of.
DON'T GIVE UP! Hang in there or you'll be having this same conversation in the future.
You can add me as a friend! You can do this and you will be so much happier!0 -
Don't give up!!! Check out my blog and write me a message. Let me know what you are doing and I'd LOVE to help you. http://www.makefatcry.com0
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Some great advice there and some awful advice too!
Whoever tells you to "avoid eating sweets, eat a banana instead and cover it in peanut butter" is mental! Why ruin a banana with peanut butter???
Anyway... you have to con yourself into it. What I mean by that is that once you've convinced yourself that it's easy because really, all that sweet, sugary and fatty food tastes bloody awful, and that oats are a lot nicer, it does indeed become easy.
I compare that to giving up smoking because once you've decided quitting smoking is a walk in the park, that really, when thinking about it you don't actually enjoy smoking, dropping the habit becomes really easy (see Allen Carr's "The easy way to stop smoking")
It's the same with food. But watching your diet alone isn't going to be enough. You need to watch what you eat and you're going to have to exercise too.
The good thing about exercise is that when you DO want to eat something that isn't as healthy as your daily diet of carrots and raw beans, you can budget for it by doing a gut wrenching hour of full-on cardio (and this is where real will power kicks in, you need to feel the pain - no pain no gain) and then you can have that half a bite of that snickers bar without feeling guilty about it.
That's when it all starts to really kick in - you realize that just to "earn" that half bite of that snack you've had to work out like never before, you'll start thinking twice about it... is it REALLY worth the hassle? Then you start losing an appetite for that kind of thing... it starts becoming easier to turn away from sweets and other unhealthy treats and snacks because you know the price you're going to have to pay for it later...
Move, just keep moving, avoid everything that moves for you. Don't take the car unless you REALLY have to.
I've found riding a bike everywhere really helps, exercising at home with PS3 (wii of xbox) exercising games (EA sports active) is a lot easier than joining a gym - there's nobody there to see all your flabby bits wobble as you first start out exercising again, you can sweat it out without having to be embarrassed about the litres of sweat you're excreting, it's never closed so you can come home from work at 1:00 am and still do that 45 minutes of cardio every day... no more excuses...
Also, I highly recommend the 100 pushups and 100 situps programs - they really help speed things up.
http://hundredpushups.com/
And also, no point in being too aggressive about reducing your calorie intake or you'll be going into starvation mode. Do more exercise instead. You'll feel better for it.
There's nothing better than collapsing at home on your yoga mat from sheer exhaustion - it's better than sex (well... almost).
The thing also with losing weight is ironically you end up spending more time in the kitchen. Start cooking proper food, made of real raw ingredients - stay away from all the pre-processed and ready made crap that is full of stuff that even chemists couldn't identify. Grow your own stuff (even in a cramped appartment in London we were growing salads, herbs, mung beans in the cupboards etc), learn about food again, simple, nutritious and healthy food. It's fun and it's yummy.
And if your husband is helping you out with this he'll get to enjoy it too.
Finally, whatever you do eat, take your time eating it. Your digestive system will thank you for it, you'll feel fuller without over-eating and you'll be less stressed. Fast food does nothing for you, and don't kid yourself, there is no such thing as "healthy" fast food. Research shows that to be true as well as it does nothing for your work (i.e the quick lunch at your desk) for an efficiency and results P.O.V. so take the time to enjoy your healthy lunch, it will help you get a better perspective on things and you'll feel better for it.
Oh, weight fluctuation is normal, especially at the beginning as you're turning that fat back into muscle. Don't just look at weight, look at your waistline and your body tone too.0 -
DON'T GIVE UP...GET ORGANIZED TO MAKE IT EASIER FOR YOURSELF. SET SMALL GOALS AND REWARD YOURSELF WITH SOMETHING, OTHER THAN FOOD, FOR YOUR SUCCESS....A HAIR BARRETTES, EARRINGS, A MOVIE, SOMETHING SMALL BUT SOMETHING YOU'LL ENJOY.
I FIND IT EASIER TO PRE-PACKAGE, PRE-MEASURE MY REGULAR FOODS SO CAN ALWAYS GRAB A SNACK WHEN I'M ON THE RUN OR NEED TO THROW TOGETHER LUNCH FOR WORK. I MIX GREENS AND ADD GRAPE TOMATOES, CUKES, ONION OR WHATEVER INTO 5 SEALABLE CONTAINERS FOR MY WORK WEEK. EACH DAY I VARY THE SALAD WITH A DIFFERENT PROTEIN, SALMON, TUNA, BEANS, GRILLED/BAKED CHICKEN. SNACK BAGS OF CELERY/CARROTS WITH PRE-MEASURED HUMMUS. COUNT OUT MY CRACKERS TO GO WITH STRIP CHEESE OR LAUGHING COW WEDGES. KEEP LOTS OF FRUIT IN THE FRIDGE. AIR POP MY POPCORN FOR THE MOVIE. LOTS OF WATER FROZEN SO I CAN CARRY IT TO WORK OR TO RUN ERRANDS. I MAKE LOW CAL SOUPS AND FREEZE IN PORTIONS, SO I DON'T GET BORED EATING THE SAME THING EVERYDAY, MAKE MY OWN ICED COFFEES/LATTES WITH SUGAR FREE SYRUPS (TORANI) AND FAT FREE MILK. FREEZE FRUIT BEFORE IT OVER RIPENS AND WHIP IT IN THE BLENDER FOR FABULOUS SMOOTHIES WHEN I NEED A SUGAR BOOST. YOU CAN DO IT AND LOOK GREAT ON YOUR TRIP. MY BIG REWARD IS TO BE 50 POUNDS LIGHTER FOR A TRIP TO PARIS FOR MY 60TH B'DAY IN APRIL. (LOST 37 ALREADY).......YOU CAN DO IT AND SO CAN I.0 -
Don't give up! It works. It took time to gain and it will take time to get it off. Stick it out!0
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i'll be honest.. you have to want it bad enough, you have to desire it enough to eat healthy and cut out all bad foods and exercise and stick with it and you need to be motivated to do it otherwise your not going to succeed ... you can give all the excuses oh i'll start tomorrow stop making excuses and just do it! it's not easy but if you really really want it you will do it by saying I just want to give up you've already failed before you've even started and your attitude stinks !0
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i love your pic...new body under construction....so true, thanks!!i'll be honest.. you have to want it bad enough, you have to desire it enough to eat healthy and cut out all bad foods and exercise and stick with it and you need to be motivated to do it otherwise your not going to succeed ... you can give all the excuses oh i'll start tomorrow stop making excuses and just do it! it's not easy but if you really really want it you will do it by saying I just want to give up you've already failed before you've even started and your attitude stinks !0
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I jog. I have done a lot of jogging. I ran a 25k and I run about 2-4 times a week. But nothing helps. 2 weeks ago I was doing really good and last week I gained so much of the weight I lost back and then some. My hubby and I are working on this together. We grill up Chicken and Pork for the week, for lunches. I cut up veggies and fruits. But Nothing. I just don't get it. Well today I totally fell off my diet. I ate like a total pig. Maybe I needed a day like that.
Are you doing any strength training or circuit training? If not, I would recommend adding three days a week of some kind of strenth training regimen. Somehting like:
M - weights
T - run
W - weights
Th - run
Fri- weight
Sa - run
sunday - off or do som core stuf
You might also want to add some sprint intervals into your running routine.0 -
Don't give up what has worked for me in the past and continues to work is make a competition out of it with friends and family.0
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Everyone at some point has experienced what you are going through but I urge you not to give up. My suggestion is to think of it as a quest to getting healthy rather than getting skinny. Even as a guy, I started out with only the end weight in mind and was getting extremely frustrated as I consumed too many calories and worked out way too much causing my body to go into starvation mode and no weight loss. Had a friend suggest the healthy lifestyle mindset and it has worked as I feel much better and have now started dropping weight. You can and will succeed!!0
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Yes, its not a diet, its a lifestyle.
If you want to change, to get skinny again, you have to change the way you live. It THEN becomes routine and only then will you workout all the time without even thinking about it.
Your nutrition must also develop into a new era. Im talking no unhealthy snacks to no proccessed foods. Take it as far as you want its your choice.
Remember though, if you really want it, you will change. Change the way you eat, live, workout. Im not saying you will be bothered working out every time, but it becomes routine and 9 times out of 10 if you just do a little bit you end up pushing and doing the full thing.
I always tell myself, that cake/snack/burger whatever is not as good as the feeling I get when I go home and look in the mirror knowing that the change is happening because i stuck to my plan.
^^100% right on! I have loosing since January on and off and only in the past few months when I really decided to step up my game of counting calories and developing an exercise routine is when the weight starting coming off more easily.
Also, as he said, eventually you will never thinking about how you don't want to go to the gym, there will be a point where you must make time for it everyday and if you miss a day you will feel so mad at yourself. I know I do now, and it feels great knowing that this in now ingrained in me FOREVER!0 -
Be sure to measure yourself. I've been doing MFP for about 3 months and have only lost 5 pounds, but have lost 3 inches on my hips! I'd be really discouraged, but my clothes feeling better and the inches off really help.
Also, perhaps you need a physical and check your thryoid, and vitamin levels. It can't hurt to make sure you're all on track with those.0 -
You know what they say - "Old age ain't for sissys!"
Today is my birthday. I am now 42. It's just a damn sad fact of life that our bodies don't work at 40 the same way they did at 20.
If you want the body of a 20-year-old at 40 you have to work a lot harder at it.0 -
DO NOT GIVE UP!!! GIVING UP IS NOT AN OPTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ADD ME0 -
You know what? It won't really be quitting if you quit now, because you can't quit something you never really started in the first place. So go ahead, what's there to lose? Wait, you weren't asking for our approval of you quitting? Then:
YOU have to make the decision to do this FULL ON, 100%, from here on out, no "if's" "and's" or "but's" about it. YOU DECIDE.0 -
Maybe everyone is making it too complicated. You need to simply eat foods you LIKE within your calorie budget for the week. Forget about healthy for the moment and see what just sticking to a budget does. Then fine tune your diet with healthier choices one item at a time if you want.
Well this is what worked for me:
Eat less to lose weight
Exercise to maintain or build lean body mass
end of story.
Well, it did work for me. I focused on those two things boiled down and it made it simple in my mind, day in and day out. I am the fittest, leanest, strongest, and most muscular I've ever been in my life at age 51 and I'm healthy and don't get sick and have long endurance.
Here is exactly what worked for me: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/734287-what-the-venus-index-workout-did-for-me-with-pics0 -
It is a lifestyle change, not just a diet. Has to be this way forever. Takes work and time. You have to want it and work for it.0
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Losing weight is hard. I am not going to lie and tell you it is easy. For me it all shifted for me when I found a workout I love. I love to workout to TurboFire with Chalene Johnson. When you find something you like to do it makes the biggest difference. I struggled until I found this workout. I cannot wait to workout everyday and find it hard to take one day off per week. However working out is only part of the equation. The really hard part for me was my diet. I have found 5 "go to" meals that I love to eat! In Chalene Johnson's book that is one of her tips of successful dieters....they are creatures of habit and pretty much eat the same thing every week.
I found it extremely helpful when I feel fusterated to take a step back and set small goals that I know I can do everyday and master those then build up from those. For example, I know I can drink my 10 glasses of water everyday so I go back to just doing that then when I feel like okay I got this then I add something else. I build myself up so the only option is to succeed!0 -
It's amazing how so much of this is mental isn't it? I went years and years unable to motivate myself to do anything and then last November, it was like I flipped a switch in my brain. Listen to the people who tell you this takes time. Trying to make it go faster actually makes things go slower.
This is so true! I ask people my size to run with me and they tell me they are too big. I try and explain that if you let your brain tell you to stop pushing you will. When i began running for the last half of my run I kept having to tell myself ok just one foot in front of the other and I got this. Food is the same way. There are some really enjoyable recipes that are healthy.
Also stop looking at the scale there are a ton of other factors that you can look such as inches, your cholesterol levels, how you generally feel, etc. The scale is a easy way to lose motivation. Remember you are doing this for your health not the number on the scale!!0 -
Ditch the notions that you need serious and long cardio to lose weight. Look up HIIT, which stands for high intensity interval training. Focus more on strength training than cardio. Bodyweight excercises when performed in succession are a cardio workout, but they're building the muscle you need to lose the fat.
Separate your carbs from your fat. You want your carbs in the morning, not at night. So carb and protein breakfast, no more than 10 grams of fat. For lunch and supper you want fat and protein, no more than 10 carbs with it. Do three snacks a day that are fruits or veggies.
One day a week gleefully mix your fat and carbs. This brings your fat burning hormone back up to normal levels. This means pizza, lasagna, hamburgers, icecream, whatever it is you love to eat. Make 1000 of your calories that day fat and carb mix.
I joined the site about 2 years ago, and did fantastic, then I entered school and gained it all back. With the system above I can be busy and lose weight.
It's a lot easier to follow a stricter diet if you know there's a day each week when you can eat the foods you are missing. Fat and carbs every day though equal fat storage so make sure they're only meeting up once a week. If you aren't eating fat and carbs together once a week you lose your fat burning hormone levels and go into storage mode which just slows everything down to a crawl.
Good fats are butter, olive oil, and coconut oil. These are stable oils that don't turn into really bad for you oils under heat. There have been numerous studies that have proven that coconut oil is especially healthy for you and promotes weight loss. in fact they encourage you to eat 3 TBSP a day.
Bad fats are vegetable oils, shortening, and margarine. Stay far far away from these bad nasty fats. Canola oil can be good if eaten cold. The unsaturated fats are extremely unstable, so as soon as they are heated up they morph into super bad for you trans fats. So it's better to stick with the three heat stable oils. Anything hydrogenated should be chucked immediately as well even if it's "partially" hydrogenated.0 -
I am 45 years old. I am 5'5" and I went from weighing 160-ish last November to my current 125. You CAN do it! You just have to want it badly enough. Yes, it's hard, but anything worth having is worth working for. Saying that you CAN'T is a self-fulfilling prophesy. Change your mindset. Believe in yourself. Be willing to make small changes. Over time, these things DO make a difference. Feel free to add me as a friend if you believe I have anything to offer you.0
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Hello, I have been on and off MFP for over a year now. I have logged in everyday for almost 70 days. I have for the most part tracked my foods for the last 2 weeks. But I just can't do this. I don't know how people are losing weight. I don't know how to motivate myself to eat healthy or exercise. I use to be 114lbs and was able to eat what ever I wanted to 2 1/2 years ago. Now I am climbing to 160. I have a Mexico trip coming up in 64 days and I turn 40 in 4 months. I want to get skinny again. I need some help. I love reading things from all my friends on here so more friends the better. But any suggesstions to help me get out of this funk?
Honestly a few years ago, I was in the same boat. My wakeup call was going to the Dr. and them telling me that I had PCOS. Its not easy, and to be completely frank, there are some days where I do not exercise or eat the things that I'm supposed to. Im learning that that is ok! No one is perfect.
Your motivation should come from you, from knowing that this is all a journey. You can do it, just like me and everyone else here. Take small steps. Take a thirty minute walk after eating lunch at work. Find ways to get up and get moving.
Most of all, think of the DAILY successes that you've made and make that a part of your motivation. Its all about putting one foot in front of the other and eventually you will find yourself on the right track...or so thats what I'm learning 0 -
Read Dr Joel Fuhrman's Eat to Live book. Its life changing. You will likely learn what you've been doing wrong.0
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