Not the place for relationship advice but much needed.

Options
245

Replies

  • feast4thebeast
    feast4thebeast Posts: 210 Member
    Options
    You punched your bf that's shocking!! If he punched you he would be subject to a lot of abuse and would most likely get dumped. What makes it okay for you to hit him?? If he didn't lack so much confidence he should dump your *kitten*!!!
  • missomgitsica
    missomgitsica Posts: 496 Member
    Options
    While punching him was probably an overreaction the first time (especially if at that point you hadn't told him not to touch you there) I think at this point you should just dump him. If you've told him not to do something so many times and he still does it then he's obviously just not listening to you. And that's a bad habit if you're looking for something long term--what is he going to ignore you about down the road? Also, the whole I'm afraid to cheat on you because I'm insecure sounds like a total BS line in my opinion.
  • jennfisher13
    jennfisher13 Posts: 50 Member
    Options
    This thread shows that women give the worst relationship.advice.And some of you wonder why you are single and can't seem to find the right guy.....
    Sounds like a bitter man.... and porn pics and wet t-shirt contests must be the way to go right? SMH...
  • alleycat88
    alleycat88 Posts: 756 Member
    Options
    I am the worst person to be telling you what to do based on the fact that I enjoy a good spanking :devil: :laugh:

    BUT someone that continually goes against my wishes and does not RESPECT them (because that is what it all boiils down to) is someone I won't date for very long.

    My SO learned this the hard way.
  • mbeis
    mbeis Posts: 19 Member
    Options
    Oh dear, where do I go with this one? I'm going to keep my points short.
    1) Butt-touching, slapping, grabbing, etc. is not disrespectful in general. It does not make you a "possession", that is just what people do when they are attracted to each other. Pretty run-of-the-mill, as most of the men have pointed out.
    2) However, this guy should respect your boundaries. And I don't like grab-assing in public either-- it's just not classy. If he knows you're uncomfortable with it in general but just can't "help himself", he could at least show you the respect of refraining from doing so in public. No argument there.
    3) Don't punch men unless you think it'd be okay for them to punch you back. Come on. Unless it was playful and light... but the way you describe it makes me think otherwise.
    4) Forget the whole butt touching thing. He thinks he's a loser? He's already questioning if he's going to cheat on you? He needs time to think? About what? End it now! You don't want to get caught up in that nonsense. Bad news.
  • Zylahe
    Zylahe Posts: 772 Member
    Options
    sounds like its doomed to fail.
    better move on now so you can find someone better.
    :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • Jennieam
    Jennieam Posts: 300 Member
    Options
    Regardless of what I think (or anyone else for that matter) is the appropriate behaviour regarding touching/slapping/grabbing, it is apparent that you don't have the same opinion as your gentleman friend.

    My suggestion iis that you don't discuss the matter with him any further, don't argue as to who is right or wrong, just say that you wish to end the relationship and walk away. Change the locks on your door if you feel more comfortable.

    If you feel that you need to give a reason for ending the relationship, you could say that you don't feel you can give it your full attention at the moment due to other priorities (such as improving your health/fitness) ...

    All the best
  • Inebriated
    Inebriated Posts: 271
    Options
    You think you'll be in a relationship with a man and never think he's going to touch your butt? Really? I get the part of not wanting him to do it in public but that hardly justifies you punching him. Both of you seem to have issues.
  • Wezlfuss
    Wezlfuss Posts: 122 Member
    Options
    Depending on how hard you punched him, that may not have been the best initial way to handle it. Still, the fact that he freaked out on you and told you to stop, and then continued the undesired behavior anyway is really hypocritical.


    Overall, he sounds pretty immature :( You could wait for him to man-up (no guarantees), but then you might miss an even better opportunity. It's up to you.

    EDIT: Also, he's afraid to cheat on you? The fact that he's already considering it in the first place is a huuuge red flag.
  • buckeye86
    buckeye86 Posts: 128 Member
    Options
    This thread shows that women give the worst relationship.advice.And some of you wonder why you are single and can't seem to find the right guy.....

    It is illegal to touch someone in that manner without their consent where I'm from... You might want to look into that (and I'm assuming your own actions since you are so nonchalant about it) if you think all of the women are giving bad advice for telling her not to deal with it.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
    Options
    This thread shows that women give the worst relationship.advice.And some of you wonder why you are single and can't seem to find the right guy.....
    Sounds like a bitter man.... and porn pics and wet t-shirt contests must be the way to go right? SMH...

    i know right :laugh: i love when certain guys give advice that basically ends up being "you should just take what you can get and put up with his crap so that you wont be single".
  • Iceman1800
    Iceman1800 Posts: 476
    Options
    This thread shows that women give the worst relationship.advice.And some of you wonder why you are single and can't seem to find the right guy.....
    Sounds like a bitter man.... and porn pics and wet t-shirt contests must be the way to go right? SMH...
    not bitter at all. I have a great life and a great wife.
  • Iceman1800
    Iceman1800 Posts: 476
    Options
    This thread shows that women give the worst relationship.advice.And some of you wonder why you are single and can't seem to find the right guy.....
    Sounds like a bitter man.... and porn pics and wet t-shirt contests must be the way to go right? SMH...

    i know right :laugh: i love when certain guys give advice that basically ends up being "you should just take what you can get and put up with his crap so that you wont be single".
    I never said that at all. Their relationship issues have nothing to do with him touching her butt.
  • marie_cressman
    marie_cressman Posts: 980 Member
    Options
    Horrible place for relationship advice.. But I'll give it a go anyway.

    Kick him to the curb.

    He's obviously disrespectful. Now, I like a nice slap now and then. But that's a personal thing (and I've been with my fiance for 4 years). You've already said MANY times that you DO NOT like it. And explained why. Yet he still did it again.

    Also, if HE thinks he's a loser (has nothing to offer you, doesn't think he deserves you, etc) then he's probably a loser. If he is in the mindset of being inferior, and hasn't changed anything yet, then he probably won't.

    That's all I've got to say about that. </gump>

    I have to agree.

    If he said he had to "think" about it... What exactly is he thinking about? Whether or not it's ok to disrespect you and go against something you feel strongly about? Doesn't sound like someone I'd want to make it work with. You can't change people. They'll do as they please. I accept my husband's faults, but refuse to back down when I feel I'm right. There always has to be a middle ground. So far, he has never done anything that completely crossed the line with me and was a deal breaker. That being said, your deal breaker was made clear yet he repeatedly did it. Good luck hun.
  • HunterKiller_wechange
    HunterKiller_wechange Posts: 369 Member
    Options
    Stop beating each other up and just f**k already!


    17427511.png[/url]
  • ZombieChaser
    ZombieChaser Posts: 1,555 Member
    Options
    Ok, I stopped reading after you wrote that you punched him for slapping your butt. That's cray-cray!
  • bathsheba_c
    bathsheba_c Posts: 1,873 Member
    Options
    When someone says that they're not good enough for you, they are usually right. If he is already flagrantly violating your boundaries so early on in the relationship, there is no happy ending to this story. Get out now.

    Also, if you are punching a guy the first time he touches your butt, then it sounds like you have your own issues to work through before getting into a serious relationship. Good luck.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Options
    The wall of text hurt my eyes.


    Break up.




    Gonna be honest, didn't even read anything.
  • Wonderob
    Wonderob Posts: 1,372 Member
    Options
    it's been going well except the last few hang outs.

    Hang-outs? Ultimations, physical violence, disrespecting, anger, rage. Oh boy this relationship sounds a whole lot of fun!

    If that's not enough then analyse what he said about cheating. Afraid to cheat because he feels he doesn't deserve you!

    Not afraid to cheat because he wouldn't want to hurt you, because he wouldn't want to be dishonest to you, because it's morally wrong, because of the heartache, pain, sorrow and misery it could cause, because of the risk the risk of disease, becuase you are enough for him? Oh no, just because he is insecure!

    Stay with him, help him build his confidence, make him feel desirable and loved - then the day will come when he no longer feels that he doesn't deserve you........

    The clock is ticking......
  • fcp1234
    fcp1234 Posts: 1,098 Member
    Options
    Two things:

    1. Please break your post into paragraphs, Its way easier to read

    2. If thats a deal breaker, move on. Nothing worst that an insecure guy anyway.

    Good luck.

Categories