Lamest pick-up lines EVER!!..

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  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    "Are you free tonight, or will it cost me"?
    I would slap a guy if he said that.


    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    since its Christmas.....

    If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
  • ambercole
    ambercole Posts: 426
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    One time I had this guy pull up beside me at a red light, he rolled down his window and told me that I had a flat so Then n pulled over. When I got out I noticed that I did not have a flat and then he pulled in behind me and told me that he just wanted my #. LAME!
  • ambercole
    ambercole Posts: 426
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    "Nice shoes, wanna f**k?"

    "I like your dress. It would look great on my floor"

    Haha, I would have used these when I was in college I think! Course now if I said them, my wife would just look at me and be like, it's not the 3rd Saturday of the month yet, so...NO! :sad:


    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    One time I had this guy pull up beside me at a red light, he rolled down his window and told me that I had a flat so Then n pulled over. When I got out I noticed that I did not have a flat and then he pulled in behind me and told me that he just wanted my #. LAME!


    :angry: that would have mad me mad!!!
  • JoyousMaximus
    JoyousMaximus Posts: 9,285 Member
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    One time I had this guy pull up beside me at a red light, he rolled down his window and told me that I had a flat so Then n pulled over. When I got out I noticed that I did not have a flat and then he pulled in behind me and told me that he just wanted my #. LAME!
    :angry: that would have mad me mad!!!
    kick him in the shins!
  • ambercole
    ambercole Posts: 426
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    Last week I had a man hit on me at my job. He asked me for my # and I said "sure hun!" and then proceeded to give him my husbands #!!!!!! When he called later that week it was hilarious because when my husband answered the phone he told the guy that he could come over if he wanted to but I wasnt home, but that they could drink some wine by the fire and "TALK"!!!! All the while he is talking in this hilarious gay voice!!! Needless to say the guy never called back!!!!:laugh:
  • Chenoachem
    Chenoachem Posts: 1,758 Member
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    This post reminds me of when I used to bar tend in college. Guys would have pickup line contests as we were playing pool on slow times. Do these ever really work?
  • April0815
    April0815 Posts: 780 Member
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    "Nice shoes, wanna f**k?"

    "I like your dress. It would look great on my floor"

    Haha, I would have used these when I was in college I think! Course now if I said them, my wife would just look at me and be like, it's not the 3rd Saturday of the month yet, so...NO! :sad:


    LOL.....oh, that's sad :laugh:

    That would totally stink!!! one sat. a month?!!! Sorry...I just can't get past that!!!...:sad: My hubby and I like our lovin' a lot more often than that....

    My hubby will come up and say, "Brown Chicken Brown Cow".... he thinks he's funnier than he is :laugh: :laugh:

    I don't get it.
  • 34at35
    34at35 Posts: 318
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    "Nice shoes, wanna f**k?"

    "I like your dress. It would look great on my floor"

    Haha, I would have used these when I was in college I think! Course now if I said them, my wife would just look at me and be like, it's not the 3rd Saturday of the month yet, so...NO! :sad:


    LOL.....oh, that's sad :laugh:

    That would totally stink!!! one sat. a month?!!! Sorry...I just can't get past that!!!...:sad: My hubby and I like our lovin' a lot more often than that....

    My hubby will come up and say, "Brown Chicken Brown Cow".... he thinks he's funnier than he is :laugh: :laugh:

    I don't get it.

    Its from a 1970's joke:

    What's the two dirtiest animals on a farm? (I'm sure you never saw a 70's porn film)

    Answer: Brown Chicken Brown Cow
  • LittleSpy
    LittleSpy Posts: 6,754 Member
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    Its from a 1970's joke:

    What's the two dirtiest animals on a farm? (I'm sure you never saw a 70's porn film)

    Answer: Brown Chicken Brown Cow

    Yeah, so I still didn't get it & had to search for more explanation. So, just in case anyone else is as lost as I was -- Brown Chicken Brown Cow (like bow chicka wow wow -- 70s porn music).

    So bad, but my boyfriend's going to hear it as soon as I get home tonight.
  • agarlits
    agarlits Posts: 429 Member
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    Hey, agarlits....here's one for your collection....

    My magic watch says that you don't have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast

    :laugh: :laugh:

    Wow, I havent laughed that hard in a while. Lol
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    One time I had this guy pull up beside me at a red light, he rolled down his window and told me that I had a flat so Then n pulled over. When I got out I noticed that I did not have a flat and then he pulled in behind me and told me that he just wanted my #. LAME!
    :angry: that would have mad me mad!!!
    kick him in the shins!

    my friends and I say, "kick 'em in the neck"....kind of an inside joke! :laugh:
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    Last week I had a man hit on me at my job. He asked me for my # and I said "sure hun!" and then proceeded to give him my husbands #!!!!!! When he called later that week it was hilarious because when my husband answered the phone he told the guy that he could come over if he wanted to but I wasnt home, but that they could drink some wine by the fire and "TALK"!!!! All the while he is talking in this hilarious gay voice!!! Needless to say the guy never called back!!!!:laugh:


    LOL>..your husband TOTALLY ROCKS!!! :laugh:
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    Hey, agarlits....here's one for your collection....

    My magic watch says that you don't have on any underwear. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast

    :laugh: :laugh:

    Wow, I havent laughed that hard in a while. Lol

    Well, I aim to please! :wink:
  • LAgal
    LAgal Posts: 671 Member
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    I had a guy come up to me in a bar and tell me "Wow, your pants must be from outerspace, because your @zz is out of this world" :noway: :laugh: :noway: :laugh:
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
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    I had a guy come up to me in a bar and tell me "Wow, your pants must be from outerspace, because your @zz is out of this world" :noway: :laugh: :noway: :laugh:



    :laugh: :laugh: That one is actually so lame it's cute! :laugh:
  • LittleSpy
    LittleSpy Posts: 6,754 Member
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    I had a guy come up to me in a bar and tell me "Wow, your pants must be from outerspace, because your @zz is out of this world" :noway: :laugh: :noway: :laugh:

    That's my boyfriend's favorite so I hear that one a lot.

    He loves astronomy and he loves my "birthin' hips" (he says, jokingly), so it just kind of makes sense. :tongue:
  • kandyjo
    kandyjo Posts: 4,648 Member
    Options
    I had a guy come up to me in a bar and tell me "Wow, your pants must be from outerspace, because your @zz is out of this world" :noway: :laugh: :noway: :laugh:

    That's my boyfriend's favorite so I hear that one a lot.

    He loves astronomy and he loves my "birthin' hips" (he says, jokingly), so it just kind of makes sense. :tongue:


    LOL..."birthin' hips"!! I have those too! Done birthed two kiddos wit 'em!! :laugh: :laugh:

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