Honest male answers and opinions wanted
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Maybe your husband is suffering from low testosterone. The best thing to probably do is talk with him about it and encourage him to see his doctor. Low T can be easily fixed with treatments. There are patches and creams that he can use.0
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Unfortunately, I can sympathize. It sounds just like me and my husband.( married15 years) I have tried talking to him, like whether he is bored, or maybe might want to see a doctor. He just always says hes tired. He gets up at about 4:30 in the morning and gets home at about 7:30 in the evening. He's a truck driver. Before any one asks, he is not cheating, and I am absolutely positive about that. He doesn't even go out on the weekends with his friends much anymore. I sent a text to him at work the other day telling him what I wanted to do with my mouth, After we go to bed, I take the initiative to give him a BJ like I said I wanted to, and still I've got nothing. I'm trying to think of ways to get him back in the mood, flurting.......ALOT, skimpy clothes, laying on the bed in just my panties reading, nothing, still says hes tired. I understand he works all day, I understand that he gets tired, but I need affection and a good *kitten* every now and then too, not just once a month. But I'm still trying.:bigsmile:
Now, for those of you who seem to jump right into LEAVING. Yall are the reason 1 out of every 2 marriages end in divorce. I'm going to sound mushy for a minute, sorry, but when I got married, I wanted to stay married. I made a promise to him, before God, and I don't take that lightly at all. I don't give myself the option of divorce (except for cheating or abuse), since I don't we have always found a way to work things out. So shame on yall.
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He could also be suffering from depression. One would think that good sex would snap you out of it, but that doesn't always work.0
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Read The Sex Starved Wife. Seriously.0
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OK, this is going to sound hokey, but...
Have you read, as a couple, The 5 Love Languages?
I think that should be required reading for every couple, everywhere.
Not hokey at all. Definitely a great read!0 -
Now, for those of you who seem to jump right into LEAVING. Yall are the reason 1 out of every 2 marriages end in divorce. I'm going to sound mushy for a minute, sorry, but when I got married, I wanted to stay married. I made a promise to him, before God, and I don't take that lightly at all. I don't give myself the option of divorce (except for cheating or abuse), since I don't we have always found a way to work things out. So shame on yall.
Well said. I wonder what these people would do if they were the ones being left behind or being cheated on.0 -
Ask him to go to the doctor an have his testosterone levels checked. They drop with age and many men are affected by it.0
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Slip some Viagra into his drink.0
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Sometimes I just want to be held.
I was waiting to hear from ypou Road Dog....0 -
I want honest male answeres and opinions and if you want to be confidential to protect your manhood then great, but I need answers.
Been married a long time and my man is 49 - I am 40.... so yes, I may just be in my prime and with a dud. I get a lot of "I'm tired's" and "It's too soon's". Really? So sex is only when convenient for him, and it's like planning a calendar. Usually Friday nights but sometimes Saturday instead - never ever two nights in a row and not more than once a week. His choice, not mine.
Yes, we have kids; teens. AND while I may look forward to action because we will have the house to ourselves.... he would rather watch tv. We have the house to ourselves.... um, HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is this really how it is when you men reach this age?
How do you approach the use of drugs? toys? or is this just a crush to your manhood? Seriously
I'm 5-7, brunette, curvy but not fat, and I think I am pretty - I really don't think it is the scenery that is turning him off. When I get his attention, I can keep it.
ALSO, I'm 40 - I've changed over the years. How can I tell him that he is doing it wrong and not hurt him?
OK, now that I am about to post... mock away with witty sarcasm but some real insight into your male psyches would be great.
How can I put this delicately? Well its like this, a guy buys a brand new Ferrari and he wants to drive that ***** up and down the road night and day. Eventually though that Ferrari is no longer as exciting as it was the day he bought it. Some men will move on to other high end sports cars and some will be content and realize how good they have it with the Ferrari.
At any rate a marriage is going to lose some of its spark over time so dont take it personally unless hes out looking for other BMW's an Audis...especially if your just like a Chrysler Town and Country.
If you want to keep things at maximum excitement stay in shape, stay clean, where clean undies, and try new **** or let him try the stuff he has been wanting to try but you havnt let him.0 -
um, all men are diffrent. I know I'm only 35 but before living apart I probably got it every day, some days we would be to tired or sick, but we made up for it by doing 2 or 3 times in one day on the weekends.
if I'm being really honest only 5 days a week0 -
cheat on him..have a friend with benefits.
thats terrible, I hope youre kidding0 -
Have you considered that you're not doing it right. Sex can be exhausting sometimes if you're partner is like a starfish, lying down with limbs spread apart. If this does apply to you, you could start doing some more work.
a starfish? Wtf.....
yes, a starfish. I gotten that in the past too. I know what he means. lol.
TMI Tuesday: Last GF got the axe bc of this. A shame too, most good looking woman I was ever with but damn...it was like trying to hump a cadaver.
kinky0 -
Just break up.
There she is!
Alright, to answer. I'm 47. Everyday and twice on Sunday. I have never said no. My opinion is that men will always trade sleep for sex, at least i will. Drugs? No. Toys? Hot! And i wouldn't be offended by constructive criticism. I aim to please.0 -
I hear it is common for men to reach their sexual peak sooner than women. That's why cougars have the right idea.0
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"Hmmm this is something to consider with my situation. My husband has Type 1 Diabetes. Perhaps that might affect his testosterone. I'll try to talk with him to have it checked. Thanks for sharing."
Type 1 Diabetes explains it. Often when you're a diabetic and you're inactive (like a couch potato in front of the TV), your blood sugar rises and you get tired. As your blood sugar rises, so does your blood pressure. If he's also on a prescription blood pressure medication, a common side effect with many males is erectile dysfunction.
Arginine benefits the heart and it acts like a vasodilator ensuring cardiac health and blood circulation. It also produces nitric oxide and yields a similar effect as Viagra (for a much lower price). Unlike Viagra, women can take Arginine too to gain the same benefits as men. Show him how much you love him, go see his doctor to discuss Arginine, and put you and him on Arginine. In a month, you'll both notice a huge difference in your energy, health, and vitality.0 -
I forgot to add this link about Arginine. http://www.buzzle.com/articles/l-arginine-side-effects-and-benefits.html0
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In my case, i'm the only one inviting and initiating 98% of the time. and though we do that, but i feel that i'm forcing her. we're married since i'm 19, now that i'm 40 i feel tired chasing and don't like the feeling that i'm forcing her.0
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he probably has gotten a little bored, with the familiarity, you should try to spice it up, role play or something, do something different out of the ordinary. If that doesnt work, have a talk with him about taking libido pills (tell him your not satisfieid). Also, sometimes when men wont have sex with there wives they are getting it somewhere else, so make sure he is not cheating.0
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He has high blood pressure and low testosterone.
His cardiovascular system is succumbing to the injury caused by our western diet (high fat and high carbs).
What he's experiencing is a physiological response to poor health that unknowingly leads to diminished sexual desire.
Put him on a (mostly) plant based diet that's low in fat and carbohydrates, along with testosterone therapy in some form or another, and watch EVERYTHING about him change for the better in 60 days.
Trust me...
http://www.peaktestosterone.com/
Actually, he does have high blood pressure. Takes medication for it. And Metformin for diabetes. The diabetes is under control though.
Will have to set down and talk about the testosterone. Good ole country boys-MEN really don't like to have open and frank discussions in my experience.
I was going to ask about medications. But you answered that. Any others? Anxiety meds?
From Wikipedia.
Metformin has also been reported to decrease the blood levels of thyroid-stimulating hormone in people with hypothyroidism,[53] and, in men, testosterone'0 -
It's intimacy, and it's important.familiarity because a sex/relationship killer bothers me so bad. I hate to think that relationships wilt because of that nowadays...
All of the suggestions to have him checked out are good. TRy to go about it in a non combative way.0 -
LOW T.
Tell him to move his *kitten* to the doc.0 -
I'm 46 and I like it daily (twice if possible) and the libido remains quite active. Thank you lawd.
Sad truth is he is either no longer interested in you or has ED issues. Surprise him one night with alcoholic beverages and sexy lingerie. Make him comfortable and if the still says no then you really have a serious problem to discuss with him. Maybe you both need counseling with a sex therapist and/or he needs a little blue pill to get his motor running again. Sounds like a couch potato. Maybe he should watch less tv and workout which will help the sex life.0 -
FYI everyone - The person who started this topic has deactivated their account. Appears that they may have received the information they were looking for and moved on with their life.0
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"Hmmm this is something to consider with my situation. My husband has Type 1 Diabetes. Perhaps that might affect his testosterone. I'll try to talk with him to have it checked. Thanks for sharing."
Type 1 Diabetes explains it. Often when you're a diabetic and you're inactive (like a couch potato in front of the TV), your blood sugar rises and you get tired. As your blood sugar rises, so does your blood pressure. If he's also on a prescription blood pressure medication, a common side effect with many males is erectile dysfunction.
Arginine benefits the heart and it acts like a vasodilator ensuring cardiac health and blood circulation. It also produces nitric oxide and yields a similar effect as Viagra (for a much lower price). Unlike Viagra, women can take Arginine too to gain the same benefits as men. Show him how much you love him, go see his doctor to discuss Arginine, and put you and him on Arginine. In a month, you'll both notice a huge difference in your energy, health, and vitality.
Well being a 24 year old girl I can't speak to the effects of L-Arginine on erectile dysfunction, but I take pro-argi 9 plus (L-Arginine powder you mix in water) every morning and I feel the effects immediately... it's almost like a shot of adrenaline, I wake up instantly and my brain / body works better all day. Definitely gets you moving and is very very good for vascular support. It's contra-indicated in a few cases, the biggest one I know is if you've ever had cancer, but I definitely suggest you give it a go... maybe it'll give your husband back his energy and interest
http://au.synergyworldwide.com/Products/Product.aspx?ItemId=56770 -
Now, for those of you who seem to jump right into LEAVING. Yall are the reason 1 out of every 2 marriages end in divorce. I'm going to sound mushy for a minute, sorry, but when I got married, I wanted to stay married. I made a promise to him, before God, and I don't take that lightly at all. I don't give myself the option of divorce (except for cheating or abuse), since I don't we have always found a way to work things out. So shame on yall.
yeh, lets stay in a miserable unsatisfying relationship because you made a promise to him before God. Crap happens, things don't work out...you should be able to move on. There's WAY too many other men/women out there to be stuck in an unfufilling relationship. Sometimes divorce is the only answer. So to tell us "shame on yall" is just bullcrap.0
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