Top 5 things you say/type at work
Replies
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This is all typed, there's no one to talk to...
1. myfitnesspal.com
2. facebook.com
3. Please see the attachment on this e-mail.
4. All the best
5. How far along are you on that?0 -
1. 354 this is Kara
2. good morning
3. "are you f-in kidding me?!"
4. "coverage"
5. "shut up Sheila"
wanna know the top 5 things I THINK at work?
1. how much longer?
2. you;re an idiot
3. quit complaining
4. why cant i give everyone a dose of valium?
5. i hope that phone call isnt for me0 -
1. Poco garage, Melanie speaking.
2. Bus #
3. Hang on, I will transfer you to the supervisor.
4. Pick up or change.
5. Ok thanks.0 -
1. No thank you
2. Stop running
3. What do you need to say?
4. What have you been learning today?
5. Shhhh listen
I work with children aged 0-50 -
1. Good
2. sign your slip
3. have you been here before?
4. It all adds up
5. back up, seriously your in my space0 -
1. poop
2. pee
3. vaginal
4. you will feel a little poke.
5. just a second...I'm on MFP.
scratch that...move #5 to #1 and everything else down one.0 -
1) he's on the other line, would you like his voicemail?
2) Good morning (place of business)
3) he is, one moment please
4) *kitten* my life
5) good day sir0 -
1). Why do cars never pull over to the right when they see a big huge ambulance behind them with 50 million lights and loud *kitten* sirens?
2).. Hi.. whats going on today?
3). Ok we are now going to hook you up to our monitor and start an IV
4). Which hospital would you like to be transported to?
5). **** just got real...to my partner of course, not the patient0 -
And then the weekend job.
1. Did you call Advance?
2. Last Name?
3. I don't have change.
4. Every 10 days your payment is late, it's a $30.00 late fee. You were 40 days late. $120.00 extra is the least of your worries. You better be glad he didn't show up with the repo truck.
5. No, sir. You can not drive off the lot with no down payment and no insurance. It really doesn't work that way.0 -
STOP.
A little quiter, please.
Get out of there.
Get off of him.
Don't touch that.
I'm a stay at home mom.0 -
1. Tell me how you really feel.
2. Would like to make that a combo meal?
3. It's $50 extra if he watches.
4. No, that doesn't come in pink.
5. =IF(G2="Sponsor","01u40000008Xw2FAAS", IF(G2="Regular","01u40000008Xw2tAAC","01u40000008Xw33AAC"))0 -
1. Would you like your milk in a bag?
2. Would you like a hand out with that?
3. Would you like your flowers wrapped?
4. I'm on my break, call someone else.
5. So sorry, we don't carry *enter exotic unheard of item*
You don't look like a bagger............although they do come in many different shapes and sizes....no offense at all, just my observation from here, and your pro pic.0 -
1. How do we get paid for that?
2. Quantities are busted (again)
3. Take off doesn't match the bid quantity
4. Another book smart street stupid engineer designed something we can't build
5. Is it beer thirty yet?
Top 5 I think but never say
1. How in the h can you work in this industry for 30 years and NOT know how to read a set of plans?
2. Just because your father is a big wig at this place doesn't mean that you deserve to keep your job here.
3. Wish my lazy coworker would get off face book and start doing his job instead of pushing it off on me
4. Basic math skills people. I'm not your geometry or algebra teacher
5. Is it beer thirty yet? these people are driving me batty.0 -
Inmate told he will not be receiving his "meds from the outs" here in jail: IM verbalized understanding but was not amused with this writer.0
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Are you in any pain/ how are you feeling?
I have your medicine.
Do you need help going to the bathroom?
Okay, time to roll onto your side/stand up/sit down/walk/ect.
This might hurt a bit.0 -
1) Guten Morgen. Bitte sagen Sie dass alles nach Plan lauft. Gut, Danke, aufwiederhören.
2) What do you mean the field went offline 2 hours ago? You're supposed to call us!
3) Hey Boss, we just lost (insert number) of Gigs on (insert name of gas field/pipeline here)
4) GUD just called control energy for tomorrow and we're mismatched with Statoil at the TTF
5) I need a coffee!!0 -
This is all typed, there's no one to talk to...
1. myfitnesspal.com
2. facebook.com
3. Please see the attachment on this e-mail.
4. All the best
5. How far along are you on that?
Easy job, no fair!!!0 -
1. Good morning! or Hola, como estas? Oh bien, gracias. The guys like to ask me in Spanish all the time.
2. Starbucks?
3. Let's play. (we do foosball with a couple of people)
4. Yes I'll do that for you.
5. You're not busy, right? (good one for the engineers who look at you like you have two heads)
Things I type:
1. Will this need to be extended?
2. Please let me know if you have questions.
3. Please note...
4. Here is where your documents are located.
5. See attachment.0 -
1. (@8:15 when I walk in 15 minutes late) Is it time to go home yet?
2. How long until 5 o'clock?
3. That is not grounds for dismissal.
4. Just pay your ticket.
5. It's freezing in here.0 -
1. Good Morning/Afternoon
2. If you have any questions or need anything else, please let me know.
3. Is it 5:00 yet?
4. Artwork is Actual Size, Camera Ready. Please send a proof.
5. The logo you sent me is a jps (raster). I need a vector file if you have it, such as .ai, .eps, or .cdr, otherwise we'll have to recreate your logo in vector.0 -
1. "write it down or it didn't happen"
2. "have you done a job sheet for that?"
3. "Which Gordon would you like?"
4. "Can you put me through to parts please?"
5. "Good boy"
2 different jobs0 -
1. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
2. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
3. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
4. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
5. That's just placeholder text (as relates to lorem ipsum)
HA! sounds a lot like my days.
and maybe you can also relate to "yes, an image will go there...FPO means FOR PLACEMENT ONLY"0 -
1. No, this is not a proper vector file.
2. The fonts have not been converted to outlines.
3. It's freezing in here.
4. I hate fixing other people's crappy designs.
5. Let us know if there's anything else we can do for you.0 -
1) Guten Morgen. Bitte sagen Sie dass alles nach Plan lauft. Gut, Danke, aufwiederhören.
2) What do you mean the field went offline 2 hours ago? You're supposed to call us!
3) Hey Boss, we just lost (insert number) of Gigs on (insert name of gas field/pipeline here)
4) GUD just called control energy for tomorrow and we're mismatched with Statoil at the TTF
5) I need a coffee!!
Gotta love a job where you can speak two languages, one of them NOT spanish. Tschuss!0 -
5 things said:
1. Good afternoon/evening, how can i help you?
2. Im glad everything is ok.
3. Have you tried entering your 4 digit code into your panel?
4. Could you step away from your alarm, sir/maam?
5. What is your password/code?
5 things typed:
1. Password verified
2. Update
3. Cancel
4. False alarm
5. Delivered0 -
1. Did so-and-so have a BM (bowel movement)?
2. No, the supervisor didn't tell me so-and-so was in the hospital.
3. Are you scheduled to work? Because I'm on the schedule...? Okay I'll go home.
4. Stop staring at me.
5. OMG, it went everywhere.0 -
1. No, this is not a proper vector file.
2. The fonts have not been converted to outlines.
3. It's freezing in here.
4. I hate fixing other people's crappy designs.
5. Let us know if there's anything else we can do for you.
Ok....sounds like you're in the same industry as me....promotional products? Supplier? Distributor?0 -
Since being a stay at home mom:
1. "I love you!"
2. "What are you doing?"
3. "Are you hungry/tired?"
4. "Do you want a bottle?"
5. *laugh out loud* " You're a weirdo!"
BEFORE I had my son:
1. "Hi, How are you today?"
2.: "Step up on the scale. please!"
3. "Have a seat on the table, please."
4. "What is the reason for your visit today?"
5. "All right, the doctor will be in to see you shortly!"0 -
1. I don't care.
2. It needs to be annotated or it won't pass the audit
3. I'm going to a meeting
4. Is it a breach?
5. I anticipate the sky falling this quarter.0 -
1. It's the door on the right.
2. You need to press the button on the wall.
3. I'm afraid I can't help you with that, you'll need to come speak to the day staff.
4. I'll just go do the headcount.
5. Is it 11pm yet?0
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