Mikes Daily Rant 10/16/2012 Topic: The Stairs are fun

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Hello My Fitness Pal. I have decided to journal things that frustrate me when it comes to anything related to health, fitness, nutrition and exercise. I started this 2 days ago and will continue to make it a daily occurence. I didnt think that todays rant would come so soon in the day, However it did come. Here it is. I have a coworker that has known me for about 3 years. She has known me as 381 pound Mike and she has known me as 180 pound Mike. Long story short, she is overweight and cries to me about not being able to lose weight and that she is proud of me but cant find motivation to do the same. We talk on the way to the building and she just runs out of energy to talk so I do most of the talking when this happens. So today I mentioned something rather touchy. I finally said to her stop crying about losing weight because I hate negativity. It makes me upset. She stopped crying abruptly. It was so funny! I just said it begins now. If you talk about not being able to lose the weight. I will walk away. Ill let you know that she has done this while eating chinese food, KFC, Burger King and more. I mentioned to her that the foods she eats are a part of the problem. She brushes it off and continues eating. Everyday we get to the building and she goes towards the elevator and I go towards the stairs. I tell her no elevator. She says, "What?" I said elevator is a part of the problem. These stairs are a part of the solution. She looks at me crazy and follows me to the stairs. I would beat her to the 3rd floor everyday and she would be on th elevator. She made it up the stairs but it took her about 5 minutes. This task after losing the weight takes me all of 15 seconds. she tells me that she cant do it because her knee hurts. I tell her that her knees hurt because of all the weight pressing down on them. I stress to her that I know all the feelings because I weighed 100 pounds more than her. She is still upset with me and I say effort=results. I will help if she wants it but will not listen to the constant excuses. Now she is sitting here not talking to me because I was "mean" to her. At this point I want to see how serious she is. Will she come back? Will she continue to complain? Will she stop making excuses? Either way I will be fine but I like for people to prove what they say they are about. If you cant, please dont waste my time. I could go on and on about how wrong her approach is but I wont. Im just a bit bothered why she hates the stairs. In all fairness I think the stairs are fun.
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Replies

  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    How about a blog?
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    How about a blog?

    I have one but hate doing it. check it out its on my profile. I may start back.
  • agriffiths73
    agriffiths73 Posts: 108 Member
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    Preacher, continue your sermons!!!

    All that coming from someone who has been there, tried it, fought it and won is worth much more than a chubby friend to provide mock sympathy.

    I've just looked at how much you've lost - that's over a person! And while I've not lost, nor needed to lose that much, I'm with you...talk about it all you want, cry all you want, complain and make all the excuses you want, noone will do it for you, so if you're really sick of it, change!

    Put that family bucket down, and use the damn stairs!

    Looking forward to tomorrow's instalment Mike.
  • mrsvatitagain
    mrsvatitagain Posts: 275 Member
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    HA! I have people in my life who do the same, they are proud of me and complain about not wanting to be this or that but do nothing to change it. Almost as if they expect me to say something magical for my results to fall on them. It's a tuff place, because I am sure that use to be me. I had every excuse in the book and seeing others do what I wanted to be doing was inspiring to watch, but I just WOUDLNT do the same. That is the key, I wouldnt do it, not that I couldnt, I just didnt want to. It took a while for that light bulb to pop on in my mind. It starts there first.....when she is ready she will come or not, the choice has always been on the individual just like it was for you and me. And yes the negativity must GO!!!!! I love your rants by the way!!!
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    Preacher, continue your sermons!!!

    All that coming from someone who has been there, tried it, fought it and won is worth much more than a chubby friend to provide mock sympathy.

    I've just looked at how much you've lost - that's over a person! And while I've not lost, nor needed to lose that much, I'm with you...talk about it all you want, cry all you want, complain and make all the excuses you want, noone will do it for you, so if you're really sick of it, change!

    Put that family bucket down, and use the damn stairs!

    Looking forward to tomorrow's instalment Mike.

    Great! Thanks!
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    HA! I have people in my life who do the same, they are proud of me and complain about not wanting to be this or that but do nothing to change it. Almost as if they expect me to say something magical for my results to fall on them. It's a tuff place, because I am sure that use to be me. I had every excuse in the book and seeing others do what I wanted to be doing was inspiring to watch, but I just WOUDLNT do the same. That is the key, I wouldnt do it, not that I couldnt, I just didnt want to. It took a while for that light bulb to pop on in my mind. It starts there first.....when she is ready she will come or not, the choice has always been on the individual just like it was for you and me. And yes the negativity must GO!!!!! I love your rants by the way!!!

    Thanks MrsVisatitagain!! You said some very true things.
  • 2012asv
    2012asv Posts: 702 Member
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    she might be mad at you for being tough, but IMO since you are her friend.... you are helping her. I wish I had a friend like you to straighten me out when I needed it.
  • marketdimlylit
    marketdimlylit Posts: 1,601 Member
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    da hellll
  • MikeDaMotivator
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    she might be mad at you for being tough, but IMO since you are her friend.... you are helping her. I wish I had a friend like you to straighten me out when I needed it.

    We can be friends. :-)
  • ggcat
    ggcat Posts: 313 Member
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    Amen!!!!
  • AMHouse85
    AMHouse85 Posts: 285 Member
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    You go Mike! The truth shall set you free, so kudos to telling her the truth. Maybe she is hurt but then maybe she will think what hurts worse. My sister is the same, she just wants the doctors to make a magic pill that fixes everything. SMH. The magic comes from inside yourself. Keep up the good work, you look terrific!
  • NoleGirl0918
    NoleGirl0918 Posts: 213 Member
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    i've had the same situation - people ask me what i've done to lose weight & when i tell them that it's exercising & eating right, some have even said, "well i don't want to do that." i want to say Duh! the only way that something is going to change for you in your eating habits & lifestyle is if YOU make a change! It's impossible to expect that you don't have to exercise or eat properly & still lose weight. Please add me as a friend if you'd like - i think it would be great to read the daily rants :happy:
  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
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    Love it when folks like that have some misconception that you've done something extreme to lose the weight, and therefore no way could they do that.
    But often won't ask enough to really find out what was required, usually nothing extreme at all. Mental adjustment was the most extreme thing.

    And something as simple as parking far out all the time and always taking the stairs and eating smaller portions can have a hug effect.

    Talk to her about something else though, emphasis the point that you just aren't going to hear about the complaining by fact other stuff is alright to talk about. And any time she slips up on that walk in, away you go!
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,135 Member
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    Some people can jump off the high dive and some people need to be pushed off.

    It comes off as cold-hearted, but you're not being mean and cruel. She obviously can't start losing weight without someone to push her. She'll be back.

    I'm enjoying the Daily Rants.
  • DanaDark
    DanaDark Posts: 2,187 Member
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    Wall. Of. Text.
  • SGRHO23
    SGRHO23 Posts: 145 Member
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    She made it up the stairs but it took her about 5 minutes. This task after losing the weight takes me all of 15 seconds. she tells me that she cant do it because her knee hurts. I tell her that her knees hurt because of all the weight pressing down on them. I stress to her that I know all the feelings because I weighed 100 pounds more than her. She is still upset with me and I say effort=results. I will help if she wants it but will not listen to the constant excuses. Now she is sitting here not talking to me because I was "mean" to her. At this point I want to see how serious she is. Will she come back? Will she continue to complain? Will she stop making excuses? Either way I will be fine but I like for people to prove what they say they are about. If you cant, please dont waste my time. I could go on and on about how wrong her approach is but I wont. Im just a bit bothered why she hates the stairs. In all fairness I think the stairs are fun.
    [/quote]
    I think you should continue to push her to use the stairs. Even if she takes a long time at least she is moving. I do agree with you that it is frustrating to hear someone complain about something that is within their power to change.
  • samblanken
    samblanken Posts: 369 Member
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    You gave her a dose of reality. too bad if she doesn't like it. I don't think you were mean.
  • bridgelene
    bridgelene Posts: 358 Member
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    She DOES need to take responsibility for her choices (good and bad) if she wants to see a difference ever, but I will say on the knees -- both as a fat chick (who has yoyo'ed a little, which is why I'm making gradual changes to get into habits that WILL stick rather than just a quick fix) and as a medical professional.....

    if it's bothering her knees that badly (I get that......not sure how yours were, but mine literally feel like they're grinding bone on bone. But when I lost weight in the past, that DID resolve and I know it will again. That being said, I generally do no more than 2 flights of stairs at a time, and about 8 flights/day which is up from when I started MFP) I wouldn't say push the stairs too much at this point. Maybe 1 flight of stairs and 2 elevator and improve from there. Or even none, but she needs to find other ways to increase her activity that she can safely physically handle, and eventually add stuff like stairs.
  • krissielynn87
    krissielynn87 Posts: 214 Member
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    I have someone like that in my life. She complains so much, yet doesn't do anything about it. My favorite part about her, is that she naps constantly through out the day. -__-
  • Tallblondechick
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    Oh this is great.....Kudoo's to you...

    I had a boss who wouldn't buy me lunch because he said I wouldn't eat his money's worth!. Well I ate my salad and chicken breast and they went to the buffet daily...I was despised in my office for looking good. Yes it was my fault I looked good. I ate right and exercised daily.

    Fast forward a few years....I quit smoking and gained a few pounds...ok 20....now he liiterally tells me how fat I am. Not hardly fat...Just need to lose 20 pounds... He btw is surely over 300 pounds....When he comes to my office now...I just avoid him...

    I only pray that his daughter doesn't get bullied the way he is bullying me....

    Rant over...