Why do people hide their diaries?

teresaislosingitsmith

I hide mine because of unsolicited "advice" from others! On another site one person would comment on everything I ate that she didn't think was a healthy choice. I got tired of it and hid my diary....don't need the extra stress. Then she commented about how she wanted everyone to make healthy choices and if someone didn't want her advice perhaps she wasn't the best friend to have, so I removed her from my list of friends and made my diary visible again. Yes, I know the chocolate chip cookie I ate wasn't the best choice, but I ate it, logged it, and stayed within my calorie budget, so I didn't need a lecture. I count calories so I can eat what I want while learning to make the healty choice more often than not. P.S....I've been on these sites for close to a year and she's the first person to comment without being asked, so hopefully it's not the norm, but could be one reason people hide them.

Deipneus

"Just wondering why people don't publicly share their food diaries on here or even lock them with passwords? "

Same reason people cover their windows, to keep voyeurs from peeping.

bodiva88

Just wondering why people don't publicly share their food diaries on here or even lock them with passwords? I love clicking on someone's forum post name and checking out their food diaries for comparison and learning sake but many have their diaries locked or hidden from public view. I realize many probably might not know that they have their settings on private or for friends only.. but just curious anyways. I just don't see any real negative consequences for making them public versus showing them so that others can compare and learn from them based on individual goals.

Oh no. No one on this site would ever pick apart a person's diary to try to shame them into eating a different way, or hypercriticize them for not eating clean every minute, or...nope, can't imagine why they aren't all automatically public.

sandradev1

OK so there are people who hide their diaries. I have seen their stated reasons, but I still don't understand why:


probably 99% of people on this site have user names and personal details that don't give the first clue as to who they actually are anyway. LOL

That's because you are assuming they have something to hide.

I don't want people to use my diary as weight loss advice, because they would assume wrong things from it, especially as gluten free is a fad. Also I make gluten mistakes and my diary is the way I figure them out. I would hate someone to make the same gluten mistake I did by looking at my diary!

I didn't assume anything, I was using the title of this topic. I was merely pointing out that as we don't know who the member is in reality, it wouldn't matter what information it contained. Everyone has their own personal views and like everyone else on this thread, I was just expressing my thoughts.

It really doesnt matter who I am in reality, if someone thought by looking at my diary, oh, gluten free must be a great weight loss diet. (and I have heard it over and over when out shopping and talking to salespeople and customers in shops) Just because I have lost almost 40 pounds eating one... of course I gained over 100 lbs eating one too, but that's a tidbit of info you could not get from the diary, now could you?

I understand where you're coming from. I believe that most people, including myself, don't go peeking into other people's diaries for no reason. As other posters have said, there are times when someone has asked a question on the forum but their diary is closed so it's impossible to give constructive advice or if someone replies with something that you are struggling with yourself you can look to see how they do it. Also as there is so much talk on forums as to whether you should eat 800/1200/1600/2000 or whatever calories, it is good for people to check out how many calories people who have lost certain amounts of weight are eating for instance.

I do understand that some people are bashed by others for their food choices and as with yourself some people eat a certain way for good reason. I just personally have my diary open and if people want to look at it for whatever reason, they can make of it whatever they want.

FlaxMilk

People make assumptions based on tickers and diaries, which are only snippets of information and not the whole story. It gets tiresome to hear people criticize or judge based on 1/2 the story.

I take a lot of crap in real life about my diet, and I love it here and have like minded people here. I don't want to hear from the naysayers, I get that enough outside of MFP.

I usually have my diet open to friends but am finding myself more and more likely to not log when it's open, so it's probably going back to private.

rm7161

I understand where you're coming from. I believe that most people, including myself, don't go peeking into other people's diaries for no reason. As other posters have said, there are times when someone has asked a question on the forum but their diary is closed so it's impossible to give constructive advice or if someone replies with something that you are struggling with yourself you can look to see how they do it. Also as there is so much talk on forums as to whether you should eat 800/1200/1600/2000 or whatever calories, it is good for people to check out how many calories people who have lost certain amounts of weight are eating for instance.

I do understand that some people are bashed by others for their food choices and as with yourself some people eat a certain way for good reason. I just personally have my diary open and if people want to look at it for whatever reason, they can make of it whatever they want.

Thanks. Yea, I hear you when people ask for advice and have a closed diary. It's hard then.

I really don't care if someone has an open diary or closed, whatever works for them. A closed diary works for me, but it may not for someone else. I understand its how some folks get support, and from others who have normal diets with no restrictions - that works for them.

I simply have a bunch of restrictions and I am still experimenting. But my diet plan is working... and its really very easy to sum up and I don't think its really obvious by looking at the diary by food choices (gluten free can really sidetrack you as I said)

More calories out than coming in, and getting regular workouts nearly every day. I think anyone can lose weight this way. The best purchase I ever made was a food scale. If I have a calorie dense food (like anything sweet) I log it religiously and measure it by weight. The food scale keeps my logging honest.

slkehl

I'd feel pressured to eat healthier than is realistic for me at this time. I can see burnout happening and no real lifestyle change. I feel what I'm doing is more realistic anyway-in real life, no one knows what goes in my mouth! It's up to me to make it work.

sandradev1

You quoted:

Thanks. Yea, I hear you when people ask for advice and have a closed diary. It's hard then.

I really don't care if someone has an open diary or closed, whatever works for them. A closed diary works for me, but it may not for someone else. I understand its how some folks get support, and from others who have normal diets with no restrictions - that works for them.

I simply have a bunch of restrictions and I am still experimenting. But my diet plan is working... and its really very easy to sum up and I don't think its really obvious by looking at the diary by food choices (gluten free can really sidetrack you as I said)

More calories out than coming in, and getting regular workouts nearly every day. I think anyone can lose weight this way. The best purchase I ever made was a food scale. If I have a calorie dense food (like anything sweet) I log it religiously and measure it by weight. The food scale keeps my logging honest.
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I suppose that's it in a nutshell, we are all unique with different views, but all have the same goal of being healthy, - whatever that might mean for us.

Good debating with you and wish you success for the rest of your journey on MFP

Doodlewhopper

I unfriend anyone who has a private diary! The main reason i use MFP is to get healthy food ideas and see what works and what doesn't calorie wise.

Can't unfriend someone with no friends.

I also suggest you not put anything on the internet you dont want the world to see.

This is a jewel of passive aggression. Just because someone has a private diary, doesn't mean they automatically have something to hide. I assure you my diary is quite boring. If I had some reason to let someone see it, I would let them. That is what the password is for - a case would be if you want your doctor to see it, so you give them the password to view it. I have no problems giving a password to my physician to view my diary and giving me expert advice.

Random strangers have no need to see it though.

Whatever happened to live or let live? I have no problem with someone leaving their diary open, if that is their choice. Why all the judgment of people who keep it to themselves?

Absolutely amazing conclusion youve made here .... That statement was intended to convey a security concern. Please, dont bother apologizing, I will try to find a way to get through my angst by inner reflection and a peanut butter sammich..... LMBO

rm7161

Absolutely amazing conclusion youve made here .... That statement was intended to convey a security concern. Please, dont bother apologizing, I will try to find a way to get through my angst by inner reflection and a peanut butter sammich..... LMBO

By insinuating they have no business logging at all if they don't have an open diary. Where's the security concern?

Enjoy your sandwich, and I'm not in the least bit apologetic.

I like logging. I don't mind that MFP sees everything I log. I don't log for other people, for reasons I made abundantly clear. There's a lot of people who have similar views. Why is it so hard to respect that others use the site in different ways?

kazzsjourney

Mine is open to friends only, the main reason being that half the things "experts" or "knowledgeable" people say on here is actually incorrect. I have lost around 180 pounds I think I know what I am doing LOL if I want advice I will go to reliable sources. I also would prefer someone just add me as a friend and not "creep" as was mentioned.

NocturnalGirl

- Not everyone wants or needs advice and/or opinions.
- Recovering from an eating disorder
- Fear of judgment - they are more honest with themselves if closed
And there could be other reasons I haven't mentioned.

If they have a legit reason to keep it closed then I support that, otherwise I like to see friends with open diaries. Open to friends is good enough, I don't believe it is necessary to open to public unless they are asking a question on the forums.

Zumaria1

Some people could be sensitive about what they eat. I have no problem with my diary being public, I like to eat and try to stay within the bounds of my calorie range, if I enjoy dessert or pizza I have no shame. But I am new and have not experienced some things that some commented here. Honestly, if someone gave me some good advice and I feel its useful, great, I will give it a try.

As far as worry over what people think of my diary, I find I've reached a point in life where I can honestly care less if someone just wants to be a hard nose or super critical. I've seen enough of people like that in real life, where they have sucked all the joy out of eating and still have serious health problems. So, mine is public, and one day I may even ask some to look at it for advice.

Doodlewhopper

Absolutely amazing conclusion youve made here .... That statement was intended to convey a security concern. Please, dont bother apologizing, I will try to find a way to get through my angst by inner reflection and a peanut butter sammich..... LMBO

By insinuating they have no business logging at all if they don't have an open diary. Where's the security concern?

Enjoy your sandwich, and I'm not in the least bit apologetic.

I like logging. I don't mind that MFP sees everything I log. I don't log for other people, for reasons I made abundantly clear. There's a lot of people who have similar views. Why is it so hard to respect that others use the site in different ways?

You have attacked many on this thread. You need to control yourself and try to express yourself in a less offensive manner. ..and dont try to "hide it", I know you would love to apologize....




let me see your diary?

TamiMcP

I absolutely agree with your post. This is MY journey. I do appreciate the encouraging "wtg" and "good job" comments, and I do like getting information from the message boards and blogs. But like others have said, it is a personal journey and I use this site as a tool to aid me while on my way to better health and a better looking body.

chocl8girl

Mine is open to my friends, because that's my personal choice. I don't have it post on my wall when I complete my day, because I never look at anyone else's diary unless asked, and I figure if my friends really want to know, they will go look. *shrug* It's just not that big of a concern to me. I don't need to police other people's food choices, or even give my opinion unless they ask for it, and I don't much care what anyone thinks of my diary, because I log to be accountable to myself, not anyone else.

Lovestoscrapbook

I see no reason to keep mine open for people who would rather profile creep than be friends.

Yes - my diary is open to my friends - only. They can see my diary to get food ideas, give honest feedback and make suggestions. If someone wants to see it, they only need to send a friend request.

tvanhooser

If someone really just wants to look for ideas, I wouldn't have a problem with that. Whatever floats your boat...me personally I don't have time to go looking at random diaries unless one of my friends or even someone in a forum specifically asks for advice and I want to help. I don't ask for anyone else's advice on my diet though cause I've figured out what works for me and I'm sticking with it no matter what so-called "experts" and well-meaning people say. But if they'd stick to being looky loos, I wouldn't mind. It's all the unsolicited advice from strangers that I feel no compulsion or obligation or necessity to be accountable to. I'll be accountable to myself, my friends that I ACTUALLY KNOW in person and my doctor. No offense but why would I give a complete stranger any say or influence over my life in any way? Y'all may be the nicest people in the world (at least some of you) but if I don't know you, I don't know anything about you or whether you are a trustworthy or reliable source or a serial stalker or worse ..... so why in heaven's name would I give you a voice in determining anything in my life? To be completely blunt I REALLY don't care about strangers' opinions of me so I don't ask or give the opportunity to provide one.

zrmac804

Just wondering why people don't publicly share their food diaries on here or even lock them with passwords? I love clicking on someone's forum post name and checking out their food diaries for comparison and learning sake but many have their diaries locked or hidden from public view. I realize many probably might not know that they have their settings on private or for friends only.. but just curious anyways. I just don't see any real negative consequences for making them public versus showing them so that others can compare and learn from them based on individual goals.

I don't want to hear the neverending opinions of judgey people. Unless they're actively soliciting feedback, a person's food diary is their own private business.

collectingblues

Because I'm very private about what I eat and how I exercise. I'm also satisfied with my weight loss, and don't tend to ask for advice, so there's no need to open it.

Your curiosity is not a compelling reason for me to put personal information out there.

kimberliiw

It amazes me that anyone would even care if someone's diary is open or closed. No, I'm not hiding anything, I eat a pretty balanced diet and simply use MFP to log it. I don't look at other people's diaries because I know what to eat and have plenty of cooking blogs bookmarked for meal ideas.

taramaureen

People make assumptions based on tickers and diaries, which are only snippets of information and not the whole story. It gets tiresome to hear people criticize or judge based on 1/2 the story.

This is the main reason I keep mine private. I tried it public and got tired of explaining "i'm under a doctor's care, we're trying something new, I have severe hormonal imablance, I had a hysterectomy at 23, it's screwed everything over, etc.etc.etc."

suckerlove

Mine was closed but is now open to friends. But mine was closed because I got a lot of negative comments and criticism from people who don't know my situation. Now I have it open to friends and if they are like that I unfriend them.

Domingueze2

Hmm i dont mind sharing with the world i dont eat clean i still eat out like all the time i just cut down alot and work out even harder......I'M LOVING IT!!!

Mcgrawhaha

mines open to my friends, but i see no reason to have strangers peeking in on my diary... if they are creeping my diary, and not on my friendslist, then thats kinda wierd...

collectingblues

because carrying around paper and pencil is not very comfortable and not everyone is eating at home. This is why I prefer my iphone and MFP to paper and pencil. I can look up the database and bang I see everything I need to know at a glance, before I even eat it.

Bingo. I used to have a Google doc that tracked the exact same information. MFP is easier, and free -- and i don't have to clear out entries every week to make room for new ones.

Just because I like the tool doesn't mean that I want everyone on the site to see how I use it.

Dave198lbs

legal reasons

JaseyMakesHerMove

I keep mine private. It keeps me honest with myself and I find that I can be my biggest critic. When others call out my mistakes (and believe me, I make many) I am much more likely to binge. I am aware of my own mistakes, even when I am under my calories my meals are not necessarily healthy. Pressure from my friends on MFP would not help me, it would simply make me anxious. I have no issue sharing my exercises, but food has always been a huge issue.

Think of it like this, I'm a binge eater who used to hide food from her parents in her room. The idea of sharing my journey with anyone is scary and embarrassing to me, no mater how AMAZING this community is. Just joining was a huge step.

BurtHuttz

No one must know of the things, the horrible things, that I endlessly force into my mouth. Agonizing weeks go by, lips, cracked and dry from eating nothing but rolled oats without water. The things . . . those awful things. I keep putting them in my mouth and chewing in a macabre choreography of shame and gluttony! Oh, God, would that I could share the burden of my consumption, but I dare not. I couldn't live with myself know that I had inflicted the knowledge, oh, the dreadful knowledge of my food diary upon another soul.

chocl8girl