"Fluffy" Ladies: Does your man...

CandaceHoweth91
CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
in Chit-Chat
know what you really look like? I mean does he know what you look like completely naked, standing up, in the light?

Edit: Been together 8 years, and hes seen anything and everything in the light before but since having kids 2 years ago he hasnt seen me FULLY naked in the light.
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Replies

  • n0ob
    n0ob Posts: 2,390 Member
    Yeah, I've seen my wife naked in the light...almost daily...
  • ACepero79
    ACepero79 Posts: 711 Member
    I'm not a lady, but I've seen my wife in her full glory. Can't hide much at a nude beach. And she's very comfortable in her own skin so she lays out topless and sometimes topless and bottomless. In St. Martin it was all out so I saw her completely naked, standing up, in the sunlight.
  • MattTheWaterRat
    MattTheWaterRat Posts: 167 Member
    know what you really look like? I mean does he know what you look like completely naked, standing up, in the light? My husband never has except for giving birth (I dont think that counts) and I don't want him to. I know he wouldn't really care, but I don't want him to know THAT me. What about you? I told my husband he could see my true before pictures once I looked amazing. lol

    I bit controlling aren't we?

    Not a lady, but I have seen every part of my lady from a lot of angles.
  • trojanbb
    trojanbb Posts: 1,297 Member
    You are married to a man who has never seen you without clothing, in the light? What in the world....
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    I was with my exhusband at my heaviest (302 pounds) and he saw me fully naked most everyday. Even men I've dated and/or slept with after him saw me fully naked. Obviously if they are with you, they're attracted to you and want to see you naked. I am much more comfortable with my body and being naked since I lost weight. But now I'm pregnant and since my body is going through changes, I'm not 100% comfortable being butt naked with someone, so I usually keep something on, but the men want it off.
  • ironmonkeystyle
    ironmonkeystyle Posts: 834 Member
    Frontal lobes aren't fully formed in humans until around 25 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frontal_lobe).
    It's a pretty decent biological reason why one shouldn't make decisions about whom they think they should be partnered with forever before that age.

    Check out the correlation between age of marriage and divorce rates. See, e.g.: http://www.divorcepeers.com/stats38.htm
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    Frontal lobes aren't fully formed in humans until around 25 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frontal_lobe).
    It's a pretty decent biological reason why one shouldn't make decisions about whom they think they should be partnered with forever before that age.

    Check out the correlation between age of marriage and divorce rates. See, e.g.: http://www.divorcepeers.com/stats38.htm

    What does that have to do with anything? lol Weve been together 8 and been married 4. I'm not worried about forever right now (:
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.
  • elenathegreat
    elenathegreat Posts: 3,988 Member
    Do you live in the same house with this man? How the hell do you not see eachother naked?
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Frontal lobes aren't fully formed in humans until around 25 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frontal_lobe).
    It's a pretty decent biological reason why one shouldn't make decisions about whom they think they should be partnered with forever before that age.

    Check out the correlation between age of marriage and divorce rates. See, e.g.: http://www.divorcepeers.com/stats38.htm
    A. Completely irrelevant to this post.
    B. Marrying AFTER the age of 25 is a relatively new concept. So is divorce.
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    Do you live in the same house with this man? How the hell do you not see eachother naked?

    Oh he walks around naked all the time lol. It's just hard getting comfortable with me doing that. He seems to want to, its just hard for me to let go.
  • anneerick
    anneerick Posts: 147 Member
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.

    You have inspired me to run naked around my bedroom tonight. Thank you for reminding me imperfection is beautiful. :flowerforyou:
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    There are things on his part that have led to this insecurity and I'm trying to get over it. Also, that's kind of why I'm here losing weight, to be a better me (:
  • swarovski75
    swarovski75 Posts: 195 Member
    Meh. I felt that way a bit after having kids, but I like being naked too much to give it up.
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.

    You have inspired me to run naked around my bedroom tonight. Thank you for reminding me imperfection is beautiful. :flowerforyou:

    ^^^What she said!
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    Of course he does. We get dressed in the same room together, have showered together, etc. You've been together 8 years and never showered with him?
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    Of course he does. We get dressed in the same room together, have showered together, etc. You've been together 8 years and never showered with him?

    Thats why I said he has seen me naked plenty of times, just not since having kids in the last 2 years.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    There are things on his part...

    :huh:
    There are things on his part that have led to this insecurity and I'm trying to get over it. Also, that's kind of why I'm here losing weight, to be a better me (:

    But seriously, he's your husband. If he truly has a problem with your naked body (or if you have a problem with your naked body around him), regardless of how "fluffy" you are now or in the future, then there are much bigger problems you need to deal with. (My wife is "fluffy", but that doesn't mean I don't want to watch her walk around naked.)
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    1] Please don't say "fluffy" - I feel like terms of this nature do no good for women struggling with their size and body shape.

    2] I am definitely medically obese, and I'd never wear clothes if I didn't have to. My 'man' loves my insides, and doesn't have a problem with my outsides. (and neither do I)
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.

    Well said. And I'd add that whatever childbirth did to you, it was in service of bearing *his* children. No woman should ever be ashamed of her scars or stretch marks and no father should ever have a problem with them.
  • danasings
    danasings Posts: 8,218 Member
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.

    Perfectly said. Yes, my husband has seen me fully naked - front and back - all the way from the day he first saw me naked at @165 pounds to the day our first son was born at 222 pounds to my current weight, 144 pounds. And he loves me no matter what I weigh. It's probably my enormous boobs that keep him around, though. :laugh:
  • MiniMichelle
    MiniMichelle Posts: 801 Member
    One thing that is hard for women (some) to understand… men… especially their man…. DO NOT SEE WHAT YOU SEE. PERIOD. Now toss on something sexy, toss on some music, turn on the lights, and strip for him. I promise you… nothing but amazing things will come from it! :wink:
  • CandaceHoweth91
    CandaceHoweth91 Posts: 288
    1] Please don't say "fluffy" - I feel like terms of this nature do no good for women struggling with their size and body shape.

    2] I am definitely medically obese, and I'd never wear clothes if I didn't have to. My 'man' loves my insides, and doesn't have a problem with my outsides. (and neither do I)

    Trust me, I know how fluffy makes you feel, but I didn't want to say fat. I was 240+, I'm 100 pounds over my ideal medical weight. I am just offended by the word as you are.
  • VelociMama
    VelociMama Posts: 3,119 Member
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.

    I love this post.

    My husband has seen me when I was obese, fit, and now super-pregnant totally naked and in the light many times. *I* was always the one that hated seeing myself like that, never him.
  • EatClean_WashUrNuts
    EatClean_WashUrNuts Posts: 1,590 Member
    If the man loves you, HE WONT CARE.
  • BACONJOKESRSOFUNNY
    BACONJOKESRSOFUNNY Posts: 666 Member
    If I didn't see my wife naked, I'd start checking her text messages. Sure sign she's hiding something. :angry:
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    Okay, we have been together 8 years and he has seen plenty lol Just since having kids he hasnt seen me.
    I have stretch marks all over my body.

    I have a slight pooch of excess skin right above the ugly C section scar.

    I have acne...on my back FFS.

    My body is FAR from perfect.

    My husband sees me naked all the time, whether we're being intimate or I'm simply getting out of the shower. And ya know what? He still thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen, even after pregnancy "ruined" it.

    And I bet your husband thinks the same about your body. Check you insecurities at the door. This isn't even remotely close to normal behavior, and it's absolutely unhealthy and detrimental to your marriage.

    You don't have to love your body, but recognize and accept the fact that your husband does, and let him SEE it in all of it's glory.

    :drinker:
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    1] Please don't say "fluffy" - I feel like terms of this nature do no good for women struggling with their size and body shape.

    2] I am definitely medically obese, and I'd never wear clothes if I didn't have to. My 'man' loves my insides, and doesn't have a problem with my outsides. (and neither do I)

    Trust me, I know how fluffy makes you feel, but I didn't want to say fat. I was 240+, I'm 100 pounds over my ideal medical weight.

    Then why would you say it? It's okay to say "fat" - it's a describing word. "Fluffy" is a pop culture term meant to dehumanize the facts, which (IMO, of course), makes it more difficult to own your body, your size, and your choices.
  • ironmonkeystyle
    ironmonkeystyle Posts: 834 Member
    Frontal lobes aren't fully formed in humans until around 25 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frontal_lobe).
    It's a pretty decent biological reason why one shouldn't make decisions about whom they think they should be partnered with forever before that age.

    Check out the correlation between age of marriage and divorce rates. See, e.g.: http://www.divorcepeers.com/stats38.htm

    What does that have to do with anything? lol Weve been together 8 and been married 4. I'm not worried about forever right now (:

    Your ability to predict what your partner wants/ needs/ desires/ thinks about you, and his ability to see you and form opinions about one another and yourself (body image), is woefully underdeveloped. When you are older, you'll likely look back and think of decisions you made at this age related to your husband and other relationships as less than flawless. This question that you posed seems like one of those things that one could put in this category. Unfortunately, it's more challenging to notice this in the moment. Why is that? Because your frontal lobe isn't fully developed until you're about 25 years old. Do I know you personally? No. Could you be an outlier, or an exception to the rule? Sure. I'm just offering my opinion, which you solicited on an open, public forum in the hopes of giving you something to think about that could help you.

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