just starting out but failing

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  • MB_Positif
    MB_Positif Posts: 8,897 Member
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    Get out of your own way. Log everything that goes in your mouth. Trust the process. It works. Maybe you are just not ready.
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
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    I don't think you really want it badly enough. When you do, you won't have to pose these kinds of questions :wink:
  • KenishaFitness
    KenishaFitness Posts: 161 Member
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    When losing weight, you have to be committed and determined to do it. You have to do it because you want to do it. Don't even look at it as a diet, look at it as a lifestyle change. Set small goals and work your way up so you can lose those pounds to get there. Be honest with yourself is the most important thing first. You don't have to log in your food on here but write it in a journal, if you are not comfortable. but realize on here there are privacy setting to your journal. You can do it. If you are looking for motivation there are plenty of people out there that are willing to help you. You can do it, please be positive!
  • chozeh1
    chozeh1 Posts: 4
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    Hi All ,
    I know its easier to grab things that are not healthy because that is what your body is use to. First sit down with your parents and talk to them about your goals to be healthier also tell them that you want them around and you all can do it as a family and support each other. It is hard especially when you have others who have junk around you but I promise it gets easier. You have to stand in the mirror and look at yourself... say all the things you are and the positive things you strive to be for you not for anyone else..I am strong, I am beautiful, I am smart, I am worthy...get the point?

    The only failure is when you fall and you don't get back up:
    Set small goals that you can reach each week, then 2 weeks out then a month... be realistic don't go in thinking oh I want to lose 50lbs because you set yourself up for disappointment when you feel you are not losing fast enough. Then, when you do reach that goal for the week if you go above it Kudos just peanut butter on a celery stick :)

    A very important thing that I tell people is: whenever you remove something you have to replace it with something positive for you or it will be replace with just another habit that a year or so down the road you will be struggling to get rid of..
    Illustrations (my own personal life): I was spending way to much time sitting at the computer so when I decided to spend time away from it more after work I got cable tv..lol..no joke..then I found myself watching more tv than I ever had...this went on maybe a week then I said hey what am I doing then I got a revelation...let me tell you a short story ..A man had a house that was messy and it had become like a dark place full of negative energy so one day he got up opened his windows and cleaned his house spotless now it has a nice clean smell became bright and positive energy all around until 1 day negative energy was walking past and looked in and said hey this house seems nice and clean lets go in and it took residence again...

    The Point: anytime you take something out of your life it could be too much tv or internet...eating junk food..smoking.. getting negative people out of your life..stop talking on the phone so much..anything, it leaves a void that MUST be filled just think of these empty spaces in you as holes needing to be filled... YOU either fill them with positive healthy things or they will fill themselves with more negative things.

    So instead of tv and computer ..talking on the phone..eating french fries , chips, etc..I started meditating more, listening to music, exercising...writing that book I wanted to start, snacking on fresh fruits veggies and peanuts to help when I just wanted something crunchy..getting out of the house more to get fresh air and sunshine...paying more attention to me. THE FIRST 3 DYS WERE THE HARDEST!! but I set my goal for 1 week..and lost 4lbs my 1st week..then I said ok lets do another week and in 6 weeks lost 20lbs and 2 inches off my waist...but my focus wasnt weight loss my focus was to live. I can't go thru all the mental, physical, and emotional stress I went thru in 2012....but I didn't fail...I got back up and I wont go back to that place where it took so long to come from. Now I dont miss my beloved potatoes and tried to eat a fry the other day and it made me queezy...so our bodies do adapt to the new lifestyle and begin to crave good thing like I am craving a nice cold apple right now lol..

    Just do it one day and one step at a time and before you know it 3 mths, 6 mths, 1 yr will pass by.

    Sorry all this was long...my 1st time posting on a thread and I guess my heart was just pouring out..

    Now Go Get Your Life!
  • treagal
    treagal Posts: 264 Member
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    you have to believe in yourself...and want to do it for yourself and not boys.
  • smilesalot1969
    smilesalot1969 Posts: 392
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    because youre not confronting it. by not logging it youre hiding it but if you log and have to stare guiltily at the evidence on your food diary you'll be more motivated to change!!
  • Ready2Rock206
    Ready2Rock206 Posts: 9,488 Member
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    If you're too lazy to log it then don't eat it. Those calories still count whether you log them or not.
  • DonnaLeeCattes
    DonnaLeeCattes Posts: 492 Member
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    People have asked me how I just keep going and I tell them it's because I want it that bad. So, I don't mean to some mean, but maybe you don't want it bad enough.
  • chubbygirl253
    chubbygirl253 Posts: 1,309 Member
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    Well sure, you'd like to be thin. In the same way I'd like to win the lottery. When you stop looking at it like an unlikely dream and start looking at it like a necessary battle you must win then maybe you will have the drive to stick to it. It isn't a matter of motivation, it's sheer determination that pushes you through. Daily I read on here, IT WON'T BE EASY BUT IT WILL BE WORTH IT. That is so true. But you have to want it, need it, bad enough. Wanting to do it for someone else, boys or bullies or whatever, will not be enough incentive.

    For me, failure is not an option. I have made a commitment to myself I will not break. I will make the time to exercise and log in daily and track all my food. This process only works if you do. I will surround myself with positive people. I will delete friends that do nothing but whine and say they are fat and binge and always have a handy excuse. I won't accept excuses from them or myself. Do you want your excuses or results? The perfect body doesn't come for free.
    I agree people have to hit bottom before they really make a concerted effort to change. Maybe you aren't there. My bottom was losing 68 lbs and feeling awesome only to get lazy and complacent and gain it all back plus 20 bonus pounds. Do I wish my bottom wouldn't have been quite so low? Sure. I wish I had come to my senses within the first 10 lbs I gained back, but that wasn't enough to truly teach me a lesson. But I've learned it now and nothing will stop me.
  • blg5
    blg5 Posts: 89 Member
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    I log my whole day when I first get up in the morning, print it out and put it in my pocket. It does not really take that long. I also leave a few hundred calories open for any late night snacking that creeps up on me. At the end of the day I go back and make all the necessary changes. Just log everything even condiments that have zero calories (you would be suprised how much salt they contain). Once you have done this consistenly for a week or two it becomes habbit so don't give up. I am 36 and I can't go back in time to when I was 20 and commit to this like I am now. Wish I had done something about this weight back then.
  • ChaseAlder
    ChaseAlder Posts: 804 Member
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    Sometimes I pre-log my day (like if I'm at work). I'll pre-log my breakfast, lunch, and both snacks so I know how many calories I have left for dinner when I get home. This way, when I see a treat on the counter at work, it's easy for me to say "Can't have it or I won't have enough left for dinner."

    Easy peasy.

    One problem I see with your post, though, is that you're losing weight to be pretty for boys. I find I do better if I do things for myself. I am currently enjoying the way my shoulders look and feel now that I've lost fat and toned that area. I don't care what men think about them... they're mine.
  • brownshuga30
    brownshuga30 Posts: 106 Member
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    You need to track EVERYTHING not only the healthy items to make your diary look pretty!! When you don't add everything you eat you're only deceiving yourself. Like someone else said you have to want it for yourself, not for the boys who made fun of you no matter how painful it was.
  • PrincessMissDee
    PrincessMissDee Posts: 183 Member
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    Oh. Deactivated account. Guess she just didn't want it after all.
  • hannahsteveeee
    hannahsteveeee Posts: 11
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    I know exactly how you feel. Everyone who is saying "you just need willpower" and "choose not to fail"- it's not as simple as that. I've been wanting to lose weight for a good few months now but haven't had the motivation to do anything that lasted more than a day or two. Now, however, I've realised that I want to lose weight for me and no-one else and that, at the end of the day the only way I can do it is if I make the right choices. That's not to say you have to be perfect- you don't, we all slip up. But you've got to try hard and get yourself off to a good start.

    Firstly, think about WHY you want to lose weight- maybe write the reasons down. Visualise yourself and how you'll look. Tell yourself it IS possible. Set a realistic weekly target- maybe 1lb per week. Just make enough changes to gradually lose some weight- quick fixes don't work, trust me. I also downloaded loads of slimming apps on my phone to get me in the right frame of mind. Don't feel like you're a failure and don't listen to the harsh comments.

    Secondly, start making changes to make it easier for yourself. Drinking more water is an absolute must- eight glasses a day can make so much difference! Perhaps move your bathroom scales or put the junk food somewhere you can't see it. And like a previous user said, do some small but empowering things to make a 'new you'. Try sleeping on the other side of the bed and see if it makes a difference- I'm going to tonight! Buy yourself some nice shoes or take a nice picture for Facebook, just do something different that makes you feel confident and able. Remember, a bad start doesn't have to mean a bad finish.

    I'm just starting out, too- feel free to add me!
  • serenapitala
    serenapitala Posts: 441 Member
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    Oh. Deactivated account. Guess she just didn't want it after all.
    Apparently not.
  • ci0lly
    ci0lly Posts: 1
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    Hi, when you work out do unuse the calories You burn?? I think I am fooling myself ;(
  • deannajf4
    deannajf4 Posts: 223 Member
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    Here are your two options - there ARE only two:

    1) Don't try, don't be bothered to "look up labels" and stay fat - and get fatter, and die fat

    2) Go to a little effort (trust me, MFP is one of the EASIEST ways to do this) and lose weight.
  • luperaz
    luperaz Posts: 26
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    #1. I would also make sure your weighing everything. Thats really the only serious way to do this. If you are guessing or not logging things it is really hard to keep under your daily calories.
    #2 if snacks are a big problem to start. portion control is your friend. Start slowly and remove the junk 1 item at a time. Not having junk at your desk or in your house is key. If you have kids get the stuff they love and you hate.
  • Farah_akbar
    Farah_akbar Posts: 1,692 Member
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    THIS IS FOR FITSTEPHY

    well all i can say is poor you sorry i am not being MEAN but DON'T SOUND LIKE LOSER :-( SORRY if that was HUSH but you are sounding like if you were going to LOSE WEIGHT while you are sitting then you are WRONG i WAS IN YOUR SHOES FEW WEEKS BACK WHEN MY BOYFRIEND TOLD HE ITS OVER CAUSE HE IS ASHAME OF ME IN FRONT OF OTHER PPL OF THE WAY I LOOK AND THAT IS A KNIFE IN MY HEART I CRIED ALL THREE DAYS AND SAYING TO MY SELF I AM WHO I AM :-( I DIDN'T WANT MYSELF FEELING I WAS NOT SEXY THIN AND BUT I KNOW I GOT HOPE FAITH IN ME I GOT UP THE NEXT DAY JOINED THE GYM EVERY MORIN AT 5:30AM I WOULD GET OUT OF BE JUST TO WORK OUT AND I AM A PERSON WHO NEVER WAKES UP AT THE TIME FOR NO MORE ONE BUT THIS TIME I DID FOR MYSELF NOT HIM AND NOT ANYONE ELSE BUT ME. THE SAD PART WAS I WOULD TRY TO WALK FAST ON THE TREADMILL I COULDN'T LAST FIVE MINS THEN I SAID TO MY SELF WHAT THE F***K I DIDN'T WAKE UP TO PUT MYSELF DOWN THEN I STARTED TO WALK MUCH AS I CAN THEN I I WOULD TRY TO RUN SAME THING COULDN'T THEN I WOULD TALK TO MYSELF AND SAY I CAN DO THIS I CAN DO THIS I AM NOT A LOSER I CAN DO THIS AND I HAVE BEEN DOING FOR 3 DAYS AND I HAVE LOST WEIGHT NOT MUCH BUT I DONE IT AND THE LOGGING ITS A 2 SEC THING THE PC SMART PHONE IS DOING IT FOR YOU HOW HARD CAN IT BE NOT THAT HARD YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE IN YOURSELF IF YOU CANT DO THAT YOU WILL NEVER GET FAR!!!! IF EVERYONE ELSE HERE CAN DO YOU SURE CAN TOO AND I AM SORRY FOR SOUNDING HARD ITS IS WHAT IT IS
  • Farah_akbar
    Farah_akbar Posts: 1,692 Member
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    I know my diary says otherwise but I don't log all the junk I eat because I get lazy and don't feel like looking up EVERY brand.
    It's my first week and so far I've been pretty lame... I just want to be fit and pretty finally..do it for all the boys who made fun of my looks and called me fat... but also like myself. so why do I keep giving up and eating junk? :( any tips to break this cycle?

    in case anyone asks:

    5'3
    female
    160 lbs
    20 yrs old

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