Women does your Husbands /Spouse /Boyfriend???
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After reading this I have decided I must be male because I exhibit so many of the little 'male attributes' you've just listed.
Damn.0 -
pause....you are going to need to shorten that opening statement up....play....and yes, i would like a sandwich...thank you.0
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After reading this I have decided I must be male because I exhibit so many of the little 'male attributes' you've just listed.
Damn.
HAHA me to, me to.0 -
Thank God my husband doesn't play video or computer games. We don't even have a game system. We have small children though, so I'm not sure where he'd find the time even if he wanted to.0
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I'm pretty lucky too. I mean my husband DOES enjoy his ps3 but he also works his *kitten* off to make sure I don't have to. He leaves for work at 3am and comes home often after 6pm. On the weekends if he wants to play he'll usually ask me if I'm ok with it. I'd never say no because we all need something just for ourselves that gives us enjoyment. Mine is going to the gym, his is his ps3.
But if something needs to be done I'll ask him nicely and he'll stop his game to do it.
This is the second marriage for both of us so we know from experience what is cool and what isn't cool when you're in a committed relationship. I think he was much more of a gamer in his first marriage and I was much more of a ***** in mine.0 -
My EX.....yes EX fiance'....would play some dumb *kitten* game on his lap top 23 outta 24 hours.........NO KIDDING. If he wasnt sleeping or eating he was playing on the laptop. In fact...he'd eat with the lap top sitting on the arm of his chair....frequently he'd sleep with it sitting in his lap. He went so far as to create a bot of sorts so it'd play FOR him while he was in the bathroom or making supper etc. (He was the Stay at Home...on disability...I was the one who worked full time PLUS) Now this role reversal worked great for us for a couple years but his computer play / game cost us everything. He IS the EX now
He wouldnt empty the garbage UNLESS I told him to
If there was something laying on the floor...he would NOT pick it up unless I said to
I never understood why I hadda tell him to do normal every day things or leave notes. I figured he was an adult and could figure things out on his own but that never happened. Before I kicked his *kitten* to the curb I warned him it was coming. I said straight up "If you dont kick things up a notch....we're not gonna make it"............he never even looked at me but rolled his eyes and then I watched his eyes glaze over and I knew the conversation had ended. 2 weeks later.........after no noticable change, he moved out0 -
Not "all men" are like that. My husband has never played a video game, he reads directions for everything, and is an all around great guy. You just haven't found one like that, that's all!0
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Total baloney!! I take considerable offense to your allegations that all men are like yours!! In our house, I'm the one who takes out the garbage, takes out the recycling, do half the cooking, and make the shopping list and share trips to the grocery store (yeah, carry the bags too).
As for video games, what is the fun of playing alone? My wife and I usually play together...many times all night long...then off to work. And we do it again the next evening.
I think you need to focus on the good qualities you mentioned.
Sorry didn't mean to offend you..I didnt just focus on video games, I asked a lot of questions..and if none apply to you then GOOD FOR YOU! I never take out the garbage, My husband or sons do. I cook during the week, he cooks on the weekend or we eat out. We share the shooping list, sometimes he does other times I do it. Video games we play just dance and guitar hero (family time) now black ops and call of duty that's dad and sons I'm probably on my kindle then. Again sorry did not mean to offend you or anyone else..Have a Super Saturday0 -
We are from Mars, the only purpose of talking is to either give or ask information, not yakking away about babies, clothes, food, what I am thinking about, how do you look, does my *kitten* look big in this? etc
We ask those questions because WE REALLY WANT TO KNOW.. Does my azz really look fat in this dress? Do you like my hair up or down? Red heels are black heels? We value your opinions..
No you do not, you want affirmation that your choice is good, men know a minefield when they hear one0 -
Everything in life that doesn't involve food and shelter is a distraction from being bored. We're here. Some are workaholics, cleanaholics, gameaholics.0
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Wow this is a lot of why's. lol. I think I'm more guyish than girlish so I can kinda understand this stuff.
Video games are just awesome. I think I stay up later than my boyfriend finishing up quests or beating another level or killing another dragon. When the story line is awesome, it's awesome! It's like a movie, you don't just stop mid way. But video games take longer to finish out the story so we are forced to get some sleep, even if it is with controller in hand.
Some people are so absorbed in thoughts that they really don't hear what you ask unless it's what is currently on their mind. He's thinking "hm, I'm starving" and not hearing anything till you say "hungry?"
I think a lot of people, not just men, hear something different then what they say. However, girls tend to go on and on and ramble and guys are different. They're to the point. They only want to hear the facts then move on to the next thing so they hear bits and pieces and then just put it together on their own. (I'm guilty of this too when people talk for long periods of time, or I'm lost in my own thoughts about something and not paying full attention.)
Stopping for directions is embarrassing, and a hit on the pride. Again, my boyfriend would sooner ask for directions than me. The last thing I want is some stranger knowing I couldn't figure out where the hell I was going.
Men want to feel like they don't need to rely on another man. So they do it their self. Who needs manuals!
Theoretically, there are really bad female drivers. Not all, but I have seen more female's doing stupid stuff in cars than men. I.E. One day I saw a truck (ya know, one of those ones with just the front seat that can safely hold 3 people) with three girls sitting up front, and all three of them had their toddlers on their lap, no seat belts, dancing while driving down a busy road. I have also seen girls try to put on eyeliner while driving.
Anytime the words "we need to talk" are said... it's a death sentence. It's like you just called him to the principles office. It means something is wrong and you just triggered the fight or flight emotion. You should never start something off with that, it's a serious scare. Just ease into the discussion, let him know what's bugging you. Sometimes they look like you're dumb and clueless because you said something that isn't seriously bad and they're just like "really?" Or they are thinking that it was more serious then it really was etc.
Girls think about sex just as much sometimes! Lol, it's weird, but they do.
Not all men say dumb things, women just misinterpret it. It'd be like you say something and your man is looking at you cluelessly like YOU just said something dumb. It goes back to people hearing things wrong.
In short, not all men are bad or weird or aliens from Mars. They just think differently and are very very simple. They want to live, have what they need, and be happy. They're not as concerned with who said what, who wears what, what everyone else wants, they are focused on their self, their family, and their woman.
You pointed out a lot of good traits in your husband, focus on those. Let him be him, and you be you. Marriage doesn't mean you merge into one person, you should want to keep individual because that's who you guys fell in love with.
Also, try learning to play video games, it's fun!!0 -
I'm not a gamer, but I know a several of them (both male and female, actually) and for most men who are avid gamers, you have to remember that in society today, anything masculine = "bad". We're told our competitive edge is unnecessary "aggression" from day one. As boys we're told to sit in the school chair, don't move, don't make a sound. This is not how boys learn. Explaining this all in one mfp is impossible, but in a nutshell - the world of gaming is a virtual escape where men can be men.
Once upon a time, men were valued and our strength was useful. Now that the world has shifted, more of us are in offices and occupations where anything masculine is looked down upon. Games offer mental release but no physical release, so it is no secret why the gaming session can go on and on and on. It occupies a need men have emotionally for spirited competition but does nothing for the physical exertion our bodies crave. Kind of a double-edged sword.
The other questions you had regarding "male" behavior are A) not specifically male, and
unfair sweeping generalizations. If I were to make a post that asked "why are all women obsessed with shopping" or "why are all women needy, emotional leeches" the thread would turn into a hate-fest and be shut down. If you want real help/answers I would steer clear of the stereotypes. 0 -
On many levels, this is completely bio chemical. Men think about sex more often than women because it's about procreation and survival of species. Men are more competative (which could also translate to long hours of gaming.) Both men and women are driven by primal instincts to survive. These primal instincts are still noticable in the modern world. Men are attracted to breast and hips for seeking a mate that would be able to bare children easier and nurse. We have done many studies on how the male and female hormones work the way they do.
That being said, our species also has the ability to reason and understand things on a deeper level. So we can go beyond just instinctual behavior. Like, we can conclude that playing games all day and watching movies all night can cause things in their life to become chaotic. This is something we can analyze and make a choice to focus on things that nurture and develop the family as a unit.
To be honest, we cannot help how often we think about sex. There is a reason why we do. And to fight it would be to suppress it. It is how we conduct our thoughts in the living world that have true cause and effect.
Thoughts?0 -
Not "all men" are like that. My husband has never played a video game, he reads directions for everything, and is an all around great guy. You just haven't found one like that, that's all!
Okay, I can see that this is going to be a debatable /controversial thread.. Let me clarify ..yes my husband plays video games, does that make him Mr.WRONG No. Will he ask for directions? NOPE, I have to. Does that make him Mr.Wrong NO. Does he read the instructions on everything again, NOPE..he'd rather take an hour doing it the wrong. Does that make him Mr.Wrong NO..makes us both laugh..8yrs and counting and I LOVE MY MISTER he's perfect for me.0 -
We are from Mars, the only purpose of talking is to either give or ask information, not yakking away about babies, clothes, food, what I am thinking about, how do you look, does my *kitten* look big in this? etc
We ask those questions because WE REALLY WANT TO KNOW.. Does my azz really look fat in this dress? Do you like my hair up or down? Red heels are black heels? We value your opinions..
No you do not, you want affirmation that your choice is good, men know a minefield when they hear one
I don't,ask question about my butt looking big In certain things because I really do NOT want to know...LOL but he tells ME he likes my hair down and I ask him shoe preference when going out because I would wear my hiking sandals everywhere and know he just doesn't find them attractive.0 -
No, it looks great.We ask those questions because WE REALLY WANT TO KNOW.. Does my azz really look fat in this dress?
UpDo you like my hair up or down?
Red, although to be fair you had me at heels.Red heels are black heels?
I hope this helps.
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Yet another reason I homeschool my boys.....As boys we're told to sit in the school chair, don't move, don't make a sound. This is not how boys learn.0 -
M yX did tons of things that would annoy me. He would do the video games or watch t.v. all the time but you know what? I enabled the video games ( I was the only one staying up in line to get the Wii when it first came out ) and I wasn't the best partner either. When I got tired of being ignored , I went online to read and to get good conversation . We both became detached. It doesn't work if you don't work at it %110 both ways.
I think we all lack the communication and relationship skill that our grandparents had.0
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