I Really Need Help..

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Replies

  • astrampe
    astrampe Posts: 2,169 Member
    why can't you have a cookie? I have cookies...and cake. Find a way to fit it into your goals, or if you go over, it is only one day.
    Just don't think I earned it. Never do.

    I think you need to rethink your approach to this. If you don't allow yourself the things you enjoy, you either won't do this long term, or you will be miserable. Nothing wrong with enjoying food or treating yourself. Food is supposed to be enjoyable, it is all about learning a healthy relationship with food. Food is not the enemy.
    Food has always been the enemy for me

    Get professional help, please....
  • why can't you have a cookie? I have cookies...and cake. Find a way to fit it into your goals, or if you go over, it is only one day.
    Just don't think I earned it. Never do.

    I think you need to rethink your approach to this. If you don't allow yourself the things you enjoy, you either won't do this long term, or you will be miserable. Nothing wrong with enjoying food or treating yourself. Food is supposed to be enjoyable, it is all about learning a healthy relationship with food. Food is not the enemy.
    Food has always been the enemy for me

    Get professional help, please....

    I think I realized what happened today though. I usually wake up, exercise then eat..by then the calories are entered burned and the limits go up...rested most of today which is bad but, tomorrow is a new day
  • You have to get to the place where you want it bad enough, at least that's what I think...every drunk, alcoholic, and food junkie has to hit bottom.....I am 50 and have played the game for 36 of them...I finally hit the wall a couple months ago, I planned, and prepared. I started January 1st , that being said, I also do not think a small piece of cake, a cookie, a cup of ice cream etc is the end of of the world...or more to the point, the end of the diet. If you have been here a while, then you have a calorie limit set already. so the day before figure out the calories in that item, or even meal you want. Then the rest of your days intake can be reduced, if you go over, it's one day...hop back on the horse the minute you have satisfied the craving. another option is to add enough exercise to the day, so that it cancels out the treat. I have only been on my journey for 2 and a half weeks, so I have not had a "cheat" yet....but when I decide it is time, I have a game plan.....eat the treat mid-day, then I have the other half of the day to work it off. have a full bottle of water with the treat so that I fill up before I go nuts and have more and more and more......and finally be honest with that days log, record exactly what you ate...then go back a lot and read the log, remind yourself how it tasted and what it cost you in calories, then decide if it was worth it......anyway I'm no expert but that's my plan and if it helps you I'm glad to have passed it along. Beth Ann
  • I'm confused. Everyday in the past week you have been a few hundred calories below your daily budget. One of the days you were 700 below! So knowing that over the course of the week you were a few thousand calories below your budget, why not have a dessert? I agree with others and it looks as though you are not eating enough. Stick to your budget if you want, but if you have enough days below by hundreds of calories no wonder you are hungry and frustrated! Great job on the healthy eating choices, just eat more!

    Maybe if regular cookies and cake sound scary you can get healthier alternatives or even do some baking? I try not to eat baked goods unless I made them myself. Come up with fun ways to add your favorites in if you think it will help. The very best of luck to you!
  • MissDarlaDoll12
    MissDarlaDoll12 Posts: 27 Member
    All the time! Tonight my kids and grandkids were over and they all had Wendy's hamburgers, etc. Me...I stuck to a salad and water. Fair? No, not at all! I've had this all of my life. But, if we ate the cookies, sonic, etc. we would just gain a lot and then feel really down on ourselves later, so hang in there! You are definately not alone!:smile:

    I disagree with this a lot! If you eat cookies or sonic you would not necessarily gain, once you understand and learn a better way of eating. Once you are comfortable with food, and your relationship with it, so you don't "binge" if you have something sugary or "bad", you can eat those foods, in moderation, and stay in shape and healthy. I eat In N Out 2 times a week, and I'm in the best shape of my life.

    How do you stay under limit though?!?!

    Sometimes I don't stay under my limit, but I understand this is a marathon, not a sprint, so not being under every so often, isn't a big deal in the long run. I also understand how to space out my meals, days I know I want to eat something higher in calories, I have smaller lunches, or put it on a heavy work out day. I also know that eating more, going for small, steady weight loss, is smarter for my mental health than go for the big 2lbs losses that make the 1200 cal limits.



    Alot of us on MFP are over limit sometimes. I just saw a food diary from a success story board and she had lost 80+ lbs. I was shocked that she was over her limits quite often. This person ate what she wanted and logged it. She also made sure she exercised and stayed in her limits on other days. She drank water and she exercised REGULARLY. It wasnt so much her foods and limits, it was a combination of foods, exercise, and being aware of her lifestyle. EVERYDAY. She lost a lot of weight. She was consistent.It took her at least a year to lose this. Your being too strict and too concerned about how this works for everybody else. Do what works for you. Keep track of what you eat honestly, your exercise and learn how your body reacts. If you start losing, then keep at it. If you stop losing, keep at it. Once you learn how food and exercise affect you INDIVIDUALLY, then you can adjust your lifestyle so that you will lose weight in a healthy manner without feeling deprived and miserable. You have to know how that cookie will affect you today and are you willing to adjust your lifestyle tommorrow and the next day and still lose weight? Believe me, I know what I can eat and cannot eat. I ate one vegan cupcake in addition to my regular meals everyday for a week and still lost weight. Do you know why? I was able to do that because I hauled myself to the gym and busted out a 2-5 miles everday for 4 days that week. And know I was hungry like a bear. So I knew I could treat myself and nothing would happen on the scale. Know Yourself.
  • v_woolf
    v_woolf Posts: 33 Member
    why can't you have a cookie? I have cookies...and cake. Find a way to fit it into your goals, or if you go over, it is only one day.
    Just don't think I earned it. Never do.

    I think you need to rethink your approach to this. If you don't allow yourself the things you enjoy, you either won't do this long term, or you will be miserable. Nothing wrong with enjoying food or treating yourself. Food is supposed to be enjoyable, it is all about learning a healthy relationship with food. Food is not the enemy.

    I totally agree. You have to let go a little bit now and then or you will end up giving in in a bad way.

    I also totally agree!

    If you take a very black and white approach to eating and you continuously deny things you want, you will eventually get "willpower fatigue" and you will binge. Afterwards, you will feel guilty. It won't be pretty!

    If you build in small indulgences into your diet (eg a cookie every now and again!), you can have a relationship with food that is a lot more positive! I promise.
  • babymaddux
    babymaddux Posts: 209 Member
    I've looked at your diary. Please don't starve yourself. If you have time, read this:

    nbsfit.com/nutrition/weight-loss-isnt-always-about-eating-less-and-exercising-more/

    I don't feel I am and that website sort of sounds like me...

    But my point is, if the article sounds like you, you are starving yourself. That was me. I've learned from my mistakes. You are allowed to grow and change and be different than you were yesterday. I'm lucky that I have a psychologist as a husband and he did exactly what I needed to pull me out of my obsession. There is nothing wrong or shameful in admitting that you may need help and seeking out a professional.

    Good luck.

    I need to figure out a balance...and maybe I was doing it wrong today...I was doing well the first part of the week except for sodium and sugar a day each

    sodium, sugar etc, while worth keeping an eye on aren't things to necessarily worry about. i'd recommend resetting your goal to 1lb a week. learn how to eat within those restrictions first. it may well be that you lose more anyway. you can always go back to 2lbs a week later.
    the guidelines on here are like the bmi guidelines. they take a 'one size fits all' approach and as every person on here will tell you, that's not always the case. some people can eat 2000 cals a day and lose easily. some people will eat 1500 and gain. some people need more carbs in their diet, others need more protein and fat. personally, carbs from beans and grains (bread, pasta etc) help me retain weight, getting my carbs from vegetables and small amounts of fruit works much better. but trying to get 50% or whatever the standard setting on here is, of my calories from cabbage and grapefruit (just an example btw) isn't possible for me.
    if you can, get advice from a nutritionist, or a trainer you trust, and then you can use this site to change those percentages. once you know what you want your personal goals to be, any number of posts on here will tell you how to change the settings. or ask again. because i eat low carb, mine are set to 25% carbs, 30% fat and 45% protein i think. it works for me. some people reading that will hyperventilate! i also don't always stay anywhere within those numbers. but it's my life for the next 50+ years i hope. not a quick fix that goes out of the window as soon as i see that magical/mythical number on the scales...
  • lorihalsted
    lorihalsted Posts: 326 Member
    Food is what we use to fuel our bodies, nothing more, nothing less. I used to weigh well over 300 pounds myself so I know where you are coming from when you think food is evil. Food is not evil. Our ATTITUDE toward food is evil. You have to change your way of thinking and your stigmas against certain foods and places. I eat fast food at least a couple times a week (Stone me now. I am a working Mom with a husband and 11 year old son.) but opt for a child's meal or a healthier option than the double burger and large fry.

    Indulge once in awhile. Just don't make it a habit.
  • piggydog
    piggydog Posts: 322
    I refuse to deprive myself.... Have one cookie or a small French fry...

    Don't eat the whole bag and you'll be fine
  • MissDarlaDoll12
    MissDarlaDoll12 Posts: 27 Member
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/859495-if-only-i-had-known

    I just read this and thought that it might help put the food tracking thing into perspective. It took this lady years to know and have a healthy relationship with food and likewise, it has taken me years to figure myself out when it comes to dieting. I know I could lose it faster if I wanted too. But this MFP is meant to be a tool toward a healthy lifestyle, not something that has to be strictly adhered to.