Men! What motivated you? I need your help!

goblynn

Hello MFP males,

My husband has tried many different diets and is depressed about not losing weight. I have had very good success using MFP and have encouraged him to join. Unfortunately, I have been met with resistance. It's that husband/wife thing, you know?

Anyway, how did you get started? What motivated you to join MFP and how have you stuck w/ it. I would love to find away to help my husband see the amazingness this site has to offer. That being said, I know it has to be his decision, just wonder if I have been going about my 'encouragement' the wrong way.

I adore him and just want him to be happy.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

goblynn

bump

ACDodd

Show him the before and after pictures on here.
That is some powerful motivation.

BurtHuttz

Show him how many hot chicks there are on the site and tell him it's like a 10:1 ratio.

goblynn

Thank you. I will try that. I have asked him to read some of the amazing stories/journeys that men/women post on here but he seems to get frustrated w/ me.

He has tried watching his calories in the past but he has never logged what he is eating. IMHO I believe he thinks that watching your calories is a waste of time (since he failed at it in the past). I need to help him over this hump. He has so much more will-power than I do and he is determined... I just need to get him here.

goblynn

The hot chicks might work, lol!!

BurtHuttz

Seriously though I don't know what kept me motivated. I wanted to lose weight. I knew that there was a relationship between the crap I put in my mouth and the weight that I gained. I figured if I tracked and controlled the crap I put in my mouth, I would be able to control my weight. I made progress. I continued to make progress. I progressed until I reached my goal.

Speaking of which you look PHENOMENAL!!! Nice work!

wrotruck

I got started becasue tracking calories and nutrients in other ways is a real pain in the *kitten*!!!

Talk to him about switching goals to something fitness related and let the weight loss be secondary. Would he get excited about running a 5k or a 10k? Would the ability to bench 200 lbs and squat 300 lbs apeal to him? More than likely he would lose weight on the way to either of those goals and both of those things require good nutriton that MFP can help him achieve and the boards have a lot of advice on achieving them.

If he chooses a goal like one of those and lets MFP just be a tool to help him get there he might see the value.

If he's like a lot of guys I know, you may have to sell him on the idea and then make him think that he came up with it. (I think my wife is getting good at this but I'm loosing the ability to tell. Hmmmm...)

jacksonpt

I see myself in the mirror every day. I know my lift numbers from last week and my race times from last season.

Motivation has to come from within. If he's not doing it for himself, then progress will be at best temporary.

ThustonHowell

Using this site changed so many things for me. Just seeing the disparity from what I was supposed to consume and what I was actually consuming made me realize how out of control and out of touch with reality I was with my eating habits. A co-worker signed me up for this site and I'm on it before and after every meal. I struggled with my weight pretty much since I was 12. 10 years ago I was 330 at my heaviest and went down to 260 on my own. Then went back to 290 after kids and marital stress, but this site has helped me drop to my lowest weight since high school.

I keep saying that this site isn't a diet site, it's an "eating culture" site. MFP helped me realize that diets are fail-based programs, changing your way of life is most important.

I've dropped 50 lbs in six months and I still drink beer, and harder alcohol, eat pizza, and generally consume the same types of foods, just understanding when and how is the key.

goblynn

Thanks guys,

I really appreciate your input. Keep em' coming!

goblynn

Using this site changed so many things for me. Just seeing the disparity from what I was supposed to consume and what I was actually consuming made me realize how out of control and out of touch with reality I was with my eating habits. A co-worker signed me up for this site and I'm on it before and after every meal. I struggled with my weight pretty much since I was 12. 10 years ago I was 330 at my heaviest and went down to 260 on my own. Then went back to 290 after kids and marital stress, but this site has helped me drop to my lowest weight since high school.

I keep saying that this site isn't a diet site, it's an "eating culture" site. MFP helped me realize that diets are fail-based programs, changing your way of life is most important.

I've dropped 50 lbs in six months and I still drink beer, and harder alcohol, eat pizza, and generally consume the same types of foods, just understanding when and how is the key.

^^^^^^ This sounds JUST like my husband!! He has struggled w/ his weight since childhood, tried every diet in the book, loves to drink beer and eat pizza. Thank you again, this means so much to me.

goblynn

sorry dear, but the more you push him to join (and even though you may not feel like you're pushing or nagging, to him you are cause that's how the average guy thinks) the less he'll want to. he has to make the decision himself.

True. I know he views me as a total nag. Sniffle. Sniffle. It's not my intention but I know that is how he feels.

Cr01502

Show him how many hot chicks there are on the site and tell him it's like a 10:1 ratio.

Honestly I'm surprised with the way the OP looks that he's not motivated already.

The truth is that it takes a lot of commitment and discipline.

In my opinion he has to make the decision himself.

That said, a healthy lifestyle is a high like nothing else.

Everyday waking up feeling good, every week, looking at your numbers and getting stronger. That's what it's all about.

neverstray

Divorce him. He'll suddenly find motivation.

True story.

WinnerVictorious

i don't know how much weight you think he has to lose, but if it's 50lbs or more... schedule him a doctors appointment.

for a lot of us, we feel invincible all of our lives. however, when you get that wake-up call from a doctor telling you that you're heading for serious health complications not too far down the road if you don't make some changes now, it has an impact.

jledom

I just started Jan 3 and have lost 11 pounds. I'm 60 years old and my starting weight was 200 and I want to get to 175. I can have a little over 1600 calories a day. I walk on the treadmill and do a 5K everyday and walk 18 holes of golf every Sat and Sun. My exercise routine allows me to have 2000-2100 calories a day. I've been on Weight Watchers, Grapefruit Diet, Adkins, Diet Center, etc and the only one I really liked was Diet Center but that cost a lot more today than it did 20 years ago. I bring my lunch daily, eat a fruit for breakfast and sensible dinner. I use the app for my phone when I don't have access to a computer. My Fitness Pal is a great program. My motivation is that I know that as you get older it is harder to lose weight even if it's just a few pounds. Once you see a couple of pounds gone there is more motivation to keep going. I can even have a cocktail or beer after work if I want. Hope this helps. I know entering the food is boring but look at the reports now and then to see your progress and I believe progress in itself is a motivator.

doorki

One of my major excuses was that I didn't have time to workout because when I wasn't at work my wife wanted me to be home with the kids so I obviously had no time to workout. Rationalized BS.

This all ended when my wife bought me a membership to a boxing gym for Christmas. This gave me the greenlight to workout. Since I was learning something new and wanted to get better, I started watching my diet and joined here. Rest just steamrolled.

Good luck.

jacksonpt

sorry dear, but the more you push him to join (and even though you may not feel like you're pushing or nagging, to him you are cause that's how the average guy thinks) the less he'll want to. he has to make the decision himself.

True. I know he views me as a total nag. Sniffle. Sniffle. It's not my intention but I know that is how he feels.

Then stop nagging. Regardless of whether or not you mean to, if he sees it that way you are probably hurting the chances he makes long term changes, not helping.