Presentation on hot topic To Spank or Not To Spank

knedz7

agree

SageGoddess320

PBsMommy

While I do like spanking... bondage is a much more effective "punishment" ....

Oh you meant for kids not me... :grumble:

ladymiseryali

100% against it. I think it's a lazy way to parent. I would prefer parents utilize time-outs and other non-hitting forms of punishment. I was spanked as a child and it only made me fear my parents. I've seen spanking gone too far. If the parent is angry, they're going to hit harder than they should and they may take it too far. There are better ways to discipline.

carryingon

We've had this thread before, and if past is any indicator of future behavior things in here are going to get so ugly we're all gonna need a good spanking.

:flowerforyou: ^^this

pinky_pinkster

No spanking!
Research shows that spanking or hitting a child affects them more psychologically if they live in a country or society where spanking is rare or where their peers do not get hit/spanked. Research shows that in countries where hitting children is used as a normal disciplinary method it barely affects children.

In my opinion in our society and having done a lot of research on children/families - hitting children is never okay, I think its pretty serious if you cannot deal with your children in any way other than hitting, I also think it teaches children that if a person has done something wrong then it can be corrected by hitting.
Hands are not for hitting... especially where the person being hit (aka a child) is much smaller and more vulnerable than the person hitting.

Im_NotPerfect

I was spanked as a child, punished, grounded, you name it. I will do the same to my Son.

Yes this. My husband and I spank our children if the situation warrants it. My brother and SIL do not, and I see the difference in the way our children behave. My sister did not believe it in at first with her first child and the next time I saw her (about a year later), she changed her mind as well. We were all spanked as children (my mom with a wooden spoon and my dad with his belt), and we're all very productive individuals. None of us have ended up on drugs in or an rehab facility. And none of us have a liking for violence.

It's all personal preference.....I I think the most important thing is to find what works for your child. Because Spanking, Time Outs, etc aren't always the answer for every child.

chubbygirl253

This was a very misleading topic! Very underwhelming.

My fiance and I are pro-spanking! (and I'm not referring to how you discipline your kids. I couldn't care less.)

Im_NotPerfect

100% against it. I think it's a lazy way to parent. I would prefer parents utilize time-outs and other non-hitting forms of punishment. I was spanked as a child and it only made me fear my parents. I've seen spanking gone too far. If the parent is angry, they're going to hit harder than they should and they may take it too far. There are better ways to discipline.

Do you have children? Because honestly...if you can give opinions on a "lazy" way to parent, I would expect you to be able to speak from experience.

ChrisR0se

Chicken, socks, basil, milk, water, toads and cotton.

Iron_Maiden

Dag flab it!!! Not what I was expecting at all. :-( You can't do that to people, ya know!! Get their hopes up for a good spanking & then pull the rug out! :-P

sclarktiw

Ok, so who is going to start a forum on what we all was hoping this was about??

ladymiseryali

100% against it. I think it's a lazy way to parent. I would prefer parents utilize time-outs and other non-hitting forms of punishment. I was spanked as a child and it only made me fear my parents. I've seen spanking gone too far. If the parent is angry, they're going to hit harder than they should and they may take it too far. There are better ways to discipline.

Do you have children? Because honestly...if you can give opinions on a "lazy" way to parent, I would expect you to be able to speak from experience.

I don't have to be a parent to have an opinion on something that I experienced as a child and have observed myself. It's easier to just smack your kid on the butt than to put them in time-out and then explain to them why they got that punishment. When I have kids, I will not spank them because I don't want my kids to ever fear me or associate me with a stinging sensation on their butt.

whatascene

Okay I'm a counselor in training and am currently working with kids, we've had a lot of discussion over it. I think both ways work. The non spanking methods, if carried out correctly (the talking to, punishing by time out and whatnot) are very effective. Parents have a hard time doing this method the right way a lot of times though because of our busy lifestyles, parents are showing not to be patient enough.

Spanking- when not leaving a mark- because making one is abuse- is an okay method too. It works as well. It's because it's not the pain that's the punishment, it's a symbol of your parent's disappointment, and it shows how upset the parent it with the child- this is really what spanking does. If a parent resorts to spanking the child knows the level of their anger, and that they really disappointed their parent. I don't condone just spanking because there needs to be some talking to the child of what they did wrong, followed by some sort of time out or whatnot.

I was spanked when I was younger, and it worked fined. I was spanked, followed by standing in the corner. My parents never had to ground me growing up, punishments were done by the time I was 10 or so. I think they did a great job- but it's all up to the parents. You have to be consistent and law-abiding when punishing a child.

moosegt35

We live in a time where everyone is too afraid to hurt someone's feelings. That is evident in this thread from all the liberals speaking out against spanking a child. Children need to be spanked, they just don't need to be beat.

4x4play

I love a good spanking!

MsKeelah919

How do you feel about spanking your child? I prefer not to, as they are quite capable of understanding language and condequences of their actions. However, there are times when I will.

Do you feel that it's an apropriate punishment in this day and age? It depends on the situation. Spankings are not teaching tools (as my discipline is). Spankings come with your TOTAL disregard of the rules, in FULL consciousness.

At what age do you feel the child should move on to other type of punishment? I don't know yet. My eldest boys are 5 and 6, and while they don't get many spankings and haven't for a little while now, they are not out of the woods, yet!

Do you feel that race plays a part in spanking? It appears to, but I can't be sure.

Do you think the rate/importance of spanking has gone down in the present generation as compared to the older generations?Yes, I believe that spankings have lost their 'place'. They are either overused as a teaching tool, or underused cr eating an "I can do what I want whenever I wanna with no consequences" effect.

Do you feel that children's behavior now days has changed as a result of parents being scared to spank their child? No, I think children's behaviour is changing more because of parents be afraid to 'parent' their child.

Were you spanked as a child and do not spank your own kids and why/why not? I was spanked, though I can't recall them. I remember being afraid to receive one, so that DID inspire thoughts and possible consequence. It made me conscientious of my behaviour and its affects early in life. I don't like to really spank them because I believe that it breeds and encourages violence and when I DO resort to spanking, its usually because I feel there is no other way to change the behaviour. Which is a powerless thought and obviously not true. So... I will if need be, but if I had to take a stand, I'd be anti-spanking. These are not the kids we were. They are being brought up in a world that glorifies and entertains violence as a viable solution. These new ones are here to usher peace. I do not believe that hitting them will help their cause. And I want to help my children, not hinder them.

ladymiseryali

We live in a time where everyone is too afraid to hurt someone's feelings. That is evident in this thread from all the liberals speaking out against spanking a child. Children need to be spanked, they just don't need to be beat.

Children don't need to be spanked. Parents need to be able to keep their children under control WITHOUT resorting to swatting them.

And I assume you think "liberal" is an insult. It's not to me. I'm proud to be a liberal.

doorki

We live in a time where everyone is too afraid to hurt someone's feelings. That is evident in this thread from all the liberals speaking out against spanking a child. Children need to be spanked, they just don't need to be beat.

Hmmm....I'm a liberal who was spanked and would spank my child if they did not respond to time out. Lucky for me, they do.

ItsCasey

Most people who don't spank their kids CAN'T keep them under control. That's the problem. A parent might very well think he/she is controlling their kids by putting them in timeout, but that's rarely the case. All parents think their kids are well-behaved, and the ones who acknowledge that their kids are brats will say dumb things like "Boys will be boys" or "That's just what kids do" to absolve themselves of any responsibility. That's bull****. Some properly applied "education" will render those excuses unnecessary.

Lesa_Sass

I was disciplined with spanking as a child. I feel that I am well rounded and was not emotionally scarred nor have any ill effects from it. I will say that I am kind and considerate and respectful to people, something that many children these days are not because they have not been taught consequences for actions.

I do not have children of my own but have observed that people that spank have children with better manners. It has been my experience that people that think talking it out works have very ill mannered and manipulative kids. It seems to me that they get in front of people and think they are awesome with their little speech they give their child on their behavior, therefor making it more about them than the long term effects of a childs behavior. I have also observed that people that do not spank their are delusional about how well their children behave. Now in saying this, keep in mind this is my experience and I have not met every parent in the world.

I also can say that I have known dozens of people that promised they would never spank that ended up doing it when the childs behavior was horrid and nothing else was working and it ended up working

I do not see where race plays any part in your question as all children are human children and skin color should not dictate anything what so ever when rearing a child.

As far as the other topic is concerned, I am eating well, getting sleep and training hard in hopes that one day I will be able to experience Christian Greys red room of pain. :happy:

firstsip

We live in a time where everyone is too afraid to hurt someone's feelings. That is evident in this thread from all the liberals speaking out against spanking a child. Children need to be spanked, they just don't need to be beat.

Ah, yes, it must be easy to live in such a "black or white" world.

Lovett123

There is a difference between smacking and hitting a child. It's all too easy to manipulate language to persuade people of your opinion. Smacking is for discipline and more for the shock factor than pain. Hitting is abuse. Let's call a spade a spade.

In my experience, I was smacked as a child and it did me no harm. I turned out perfectly fine and if i'm honest I have always behaved better and had more manners etc than all my friends who were not smacked. They were the bratty ones who would scream at their parents and threaten to call childline every 2 minutes.

Of course it's each to their own and everyone is different, If you don't smack your children they may not turn out to be bratty, if you do smack them they may be bratty. It's down to your own personal experiences but that doesn't mean that what someone else does is wrong.

Sambytheway82

I'm disappointed, I was expecting something entirely different.

This times x1000.

This x

EstiloPanama

I spank when necessary. I was spanked and turned out just fine : )

Lizlicious2187

There was only one instance when I got spanked. I said something really nasty to my mom, got sent to my room, spanked with a belt by my dad, then told to apologize to my mom for what I said. But I do remember them both telling me they loved afterwards (after I sat in my room for a bit). My parents never had to spank me again after that. I turned out to be a perfectly fine, contributing member of society (at least i hope ;P)

I honestly don't think I can say what is right or wrong with parenting styles because each family's situation is unique. I think it's best to have a mutual agreement on what kind of consenquences are appropriate for different behavior. I have no idea if I will even have kids so not sure on what kind of punishment I would give. Respect to all you parents out there though!

homerjspartan

We've had this thread before, and if past is any indicator of future behavior things in here are going to get so ugly we're all gonna need a good spanking.

Now you're just teasing me......

softballerchik1

I work with DFCS and we feel that spanking is a legit form of discipline for children. Open handed spanking on the butt would be the appropriate way to spank as the definition of spanking in dfcs terms is opend hand spanking on the buttocks where no marks, bruises, wheps, or any signs of abuse are left. Other factors to consider are the age, which I believe a teenager is too old to be receiving a spanking. Especially, a teenage daughter by a father or a teenage son by a mother. Learning impairments, illnesses, mental issues, and other factors also play an important roll in whether a child should be spanked or not. I do not believe in spanking with anything other than a hand though.

firstsip

I spank when necessary. I was spanked and turned out just fine : )

I was spanked as a kid, but I enjoy it much more now!

KANGOOJUMPS

yep, i am all for a good SPANKING,,,,, kids are little ****heads these days.