Guys that are a 3 trying to be with girls that are an 8...
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Do you girls know what I'm talking about or is this just me?
I hope the girls do because I have no clue.
Ranking human beings like that by number is degrading in my opinion. There are no leagues. There is no objective standard of beauty where some people are 3s or 6s or 10s or whatever. That is just advertisers trying to brainwash you.
There are only adults, attraction and differing levels of maturity.
I thought the 'rating' thing went by the wayside after that old Bo Derek Movie, "10." Who DOES that anymore? Or is it that "everything old comes back new again?"
are you new here?
have you not seen those hundreds of "rate/date/hump/dump me" threads that clutter up this forum constantly??
Yep, I've seen them, and nope, I'm not new here. I simply don't bother with those threads. I replied to this one just for the hell of it. :bigsmile:0 -
THIS!!! I went on a few dates with a single mom who was recently divorced. The subject of types came up at some point. Though I'm sure she didn't mean it as badly as it sounded, she mentioned how she likes chubby guys now that she was a little older and heavier. She said when she was "young and hotter" she dated mostly bad boys but looks at personality more now. Ladies, that attitude is a little insulting. Basically you'll date me now that you have a kid and you're heavy but when you were young, hot, and baggageless you wouldn't of? Sorry. I don't feel like being sloppy seconds.Based on my past experience:
Girls walk all over nice guys and will leave them in a heart beat for a bad boy. Once they have the bad boy's baby then they look for the nice guy.
I couldn't possibly agree more.
It's insulting for a guy to hear and the woman comes across as incredibly shallow. Because she is.0 -
Who knows when it comes to dating?
I'm usually one of the jokers in the group. I help my friends with household repairs. When I saw a complete stranger get into a rollover accident, I let him use my cell phone, administered first aid, and stayed with him for six hours until everything was done because I could tell he needed someone to have his back. When one of my female coworkers had too much to drink, I waited outside with her, gave her my jacket, and even stood up to block her from any onlookers when she was leaning over a trash can.
When someone needs help, I'm there, even if I have to wade through a river of *kitten* to do it. That's just how I am.
I'm college-educated and reality-tested. I'm not running as fast as I did when I entered the military, but I have kept myself pretty fit and healthy. I'm also financially self-sufficient with a good job, a car, plenty of money saved in the bank, a house and property that have made more than a couple people envious, and zero debt except for my mortgage. I can clean. I can sew. I've even made an entire Thanksgiving meal for my family all by myself. Whether we're talking the corporate or domestic world, I can hold my own.
All in all, I'd say I've also got a pretty good resume... and I've never once had a girlfriend- not even the more causal kinds you have in middle or high school.
But I learned not to get upset with other people or to worry about what they rate me or others as. As long as it isn’t based on lies and I’m a functional, helpful member of society, I don’t care if someone rates me as a 0 or a 10. To this day, I have abandoned all concerns about winning popularity contests of any form. “Mr. Popular” is not who I am.
I am myself.
There are things about me and about the way I live that some people will not like. There are things about me on which I'm not willing to compromise just for the sake of making myself seem more attractive on the scale I think others are using. I'm pretty sure that some people may count me out automatically (especially online) for the sake of being in the military or for having facial hair even though I wish they wouldn't. But that's FINE. I would rather people avoid me for who I truly was than for anybody to even "like" me because of a lie. I'm living my life the way I feel I should because I'm the one who must account for my actions and, at the end of the day, I want to be able to look anybody in the eye and say I did the best I could with what I had, for as long as I had it.
My advice is to throw away this thought of “leagues” that you should stay in or out of. The whole “league” thing is immature, non-productive, and is just about you putting limits on yourself that may not be there and then expecting others to conform to those limits. Even if you conform to what you think others say is a “10”, you will likely STILL not be attractive to someone. Be your OWN “10”. Take on the old Army slogan and “be all that you can be”. Then you can say you lived your life and didn’t just spend it waiting for someone who may or may not have been there.
If, along the way, you find yourself with someone, that’s wonderful, and I hope we all might be so lucky. But if you don’t find someone, can you really say you’d have been better off lying to yourself and others just for the sake of not being single?
Besides, sometimes finding love is a fluke. My parents met because my mother accompanied a professor to a seminar at my dad’s school and my dad volunteered to be another professor’s guide because that meant he got out of class for a week. They met, were themselves, were married about a year later, and this June will be their 40th anniversary. But both had their lives planned out to with the expectation they would be single. They were comfortable with themselves and honest with themselves and others. That is what had them primed to find love, not fretting over some ranking system.0 -
Most guys are way more shallow than women.
Once they realize that whats important in life is a woman that gives you 50/50 and makes your life better is so much more important than having a trophy at your side that doesnt improve your life they are SOOOOOOO much better off.0 -
if you want a guy that looks like channing tatum then go get a guy that looks like channing tatum. i'd rather not be sitting next to a girl who is thinking of the guy she really wants but for whatever reason feels like she's settling for what she things she can have. go get him.0
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You know, us 3's need goals.0
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I don't want to live in society where people are reduced to a number between 1 and 10. Fortunately, I don't.0
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Guilty! lol
i honestly think this works both ways though.
Yes, shallowness is a two-way street.
That said, I find the whole number system degrading. Why not adopt something simple, like Select, Choice and Prime? That system works well for the USDA.0 -
I had an average looking, large guy tell me I was nice enough but he couldn't date me because my pant size is 16. He only dates size 12 or smaller.......seriously. How sad. Next please!0
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It's all about pheromones. It seems to me you're putting out an insecurity about yourself, and men aren't attracted to that. It also seems rather than being confident about all these things you can do, or "being a good catch" is more so a list for you. Start by being more confident in yourself. You attract more bees with honey than vinegar! :flowerforyou:0
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Who knows when it comes to dating?
I'm usually one of the jokers in the group. I help my friends with household repairs. When I saw a complete stranger get into a rollover accident, I let him use my cell phone, administered first aid, and stayed with him for six hours until everything was done because I could tell he needed someone to have his back. When one of my female coworkers had too much to drink, I waited outside with her, gave her my jacket, and even stood up to block her from any onlookers when she was leaning over a trash can.
When someone needs help, I'm there, even if I have to wade through a river of *kitten* to do it. That's just how I am.
I'm college-educated and reality-tested. I'm not running as fast as I did when I entered the military, but I have kept myself pretty fit and healthy. I'm also financially self-sufficient with a good job, a car, plenty of money saved in the bank, a house and property that have made more than a couple people envious, and zero debt except for my mortgage. I can clean. I can sew. I've even made an entire Thanksgiving meal for my family all by myself. Whether we're talking the corporate or domestic world, I can hold my own.
All in all, I'd say I've also got a pretty good resume... and I've never once had a girlfriend- not even the more causal kinds you have in middle or high school.
But I learned not to get upset with other people or to worry about what they rate me or others as. As long as it isn’t based on lies and I’m a functional, helpful member of society, I don’t care if someone rates me as a 0 or a 10. To this day, I have abandoned all concerns about winning popularity contests of any form. “Mr. Popular” is not who I am.
I am myself.
There are things about me and about the way I live that some people will not like. There are things about me on which I'm not willing to compromise just for the sake of making myself seem more attractive on the scale I think others are using. I'm pretty sure that some people may count me out automatically (especially online) for the sake of being in the military or for having facial hair even though I wish they wouldn't. But that's FINE. I would rather people avoid me for who I truly was than for anybody to even "like" me because of a lie. I'm living my life the way I feel I should because I'm the one who must account for my actions and, at the end of the day, I want to be able to look anybody in the eye and say I did the best I could with what I had, for as long as I had it.
My advice is to throw away this thought of “leagues” that you should stay in or out of. The whole “league” thing is immature, non-productive, and is just about you putting limits on yourself that may not be there and then expecting others to conform to those limits. Even if you conform to what you think others say is a “10”, you will likely STILL not be attractive to someone. Be your OWN “10”. Take on the old Army slogan and “be all that you can be”. Then you can say you lived your life and didn’t just spend it waiting for someone who may or may not have been there.
If, along the way, you find yourself with someone, that’s wonderful, and I hope we all might be so lucky. But if you don’t find someone, can you really say you’d have been better off lying to yourself and others just for the sake of not being single?
Besides, sometimes finding love is a fluke. My parents met because my mother accompanied a professor to a seminar at my dad’s school and my dad volunteered to be another professor’s guide because that meant he got out of class for a week. They met, were themselves, were married about a year later, and this June will be their 40th anniversary. But both had their lives planned out to with the expectation they would be single. They were comfortable with themselves and honest with themselves and others. That is what had them primed to find love, not fretting over some ranking system.
I love this entire post.0 -
Its a 2 way street out there.. Almost all online dating sites are just a big picture fest, nobody really reads profiles.. you send a message they look at the picture and decide to respond.. thats it.. Woman are the same way, and if your attractive on an online site they probably get 20+ messages a day from guys, of which they probably respond to 1 or 2 of the guys they think look hot.. not the nice guys..0
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Despite the fact that I've learned the hard way that beauty is only skin deep......................I'm an optimist
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between a 10 bad boy and a 3 nice guy i will ALWAYS pick the nice guy.
Incidently i have a 10 nice guy.........smug 0 -
Given that these "threes" want to date only "eights" n upwards, why would you want to date them anyway? All sounds a bit books judging covers etc to me. Having said that, if you consider yourself a "three or four" would you date a "one".0
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I know people at all levels of attractiveness who get dates/relationships... If men only wanted to be with 8+s I certainly wouldn't ever have anybody.0
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That's hilarious.0
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I got rated as a 3 yesterday and it hurt me. Admittedly my
photo was taken by my husband when I had just got in from
a twelve hour shift with no makeup on & my hair desperate
for a cut but people must realise these points could hurt people.
To be honest I don't care I'm 44 years old I know I don't take
a good photo but I have a husband who loves me for me and that is what matters
surely??0 -
I was rated an 11 by some women who were 50 +'s....so I'm good!0
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It's all in the eyes of the beholder. You're talking about Channing Tatum like he's a 10, which in your eyes, he may be, but in my eyes, he's not.
You're also talking about yourself like you are a 3 deserving a 3. I think if you have more confidence in yourself, you'll open yourself up to a lot more options and not even worry about some silly number.0 -
THIS!!! I went on a few dates with a single mom who was recently divorced. The subject of types came up at some point. Though I'm sure she didn't mean it as badly as it sounded, she mentioned how she likes chubby guys now that she was a little older and heavier. She said when she was "young and hotter" she dated mostly bad boys but looks at personality more now. Ladies, that attitude is a little insulting. Basically you'll date me now that you have a kid and you're heavy but when you were young, hot, and baggageless you wouldn't of? Sorry. I don't feel like being sloppy seconds.Based on my past experience:
Girls walk all over nice guys and will leave them in a heart beat for a bad boy. Once they have the bad boy's baby then they look for the nice guy.
You're going to set off the feminists with this one....... Man up and marry her! Come on, you're her 2nd choice don't you appreciate that!?0 -
I get the feeling he'd be boldly going where pretty much everyone else has gone before...0
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girl, your standards are too low.
Right now, make up your mind that you are worthy of the best man out there; what is this "in your league" stuff? Who's to say Channing Tatum is out your league? BS! Do not settle. Do not settle. EVER.0 -
Contrary to most girls 8, 9, and 10 self-rated thoughts of grandeur, they are usually about average. Just sayin.0
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Personally I notice women do exactly the same thing.
Having said that, to the OP, what number would you put on yourself if you were being honest, and what number rating guys have you gone for and do you go for? If you were being honest.
Regardless of what ppl say about only caring what's inside it's a fact of life that its clearly not as I know plenty of real nice guys who aren't lookers that women ignore over guys who are lookers but are total dill holes.
I imagine I'd be pretty low on anyone's at a glance rating, but if they take the time to get to know me I recon they'd shoot my rating up several notches. And if they don't want to take the time to get to know me I suspect I'm not missing out as I doubt I'd think much of a person like that.
Most prefer to put me in the friend zone as that's what they seem to like to do while finding the biggest ahole they can to date.
I stopped trying to figure out this stuff years ago and simply accept it as it is.
I recon both men and women are too influenced by the media these days.
I think the "friend zone" is the only place that something real can catch fire and become something more so don't knock yourself for being put in the friend zone. Once a woman gets over her need to subject herself to the antics of an *kitten* when the dust settles seeing the face of a man in the friend zone is so sweet.0 -
Contrary to most girls 8, 9, and 10 self-rated thoughts of grandeur, they are usually about average. Just sayin.
^^^ THIS
It is so true for both genders :-)0 -
so are you rating based on looks alone?? that pretty shallow.....0
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"In all seriousness, OP, though I know you're sort of a "Drop divisive topic and skeedaddle" person:"0
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"In all seriousness, OP, though I know you're sort of a "Drop divisive topic and skeedaddle" person:"
Otherwise known as the "one who stirs the crap". I have not been able to read enough of the boards to pick up on who are the posters who fall into this category. If this is indeed the MO of the OP there is a much bigger problem here than being shallow when it comes to dating.
Sorry for the screw up posting above. I gotta learn how this whole quoting function works. LOL!0 -
I can attest to the fact that a 3 guy can get a 10 lady as I am married to one and she is definitely out of my league. As for the OP I think you are selling yourself short, you are very pretty and maybe you are setting your sights too low and getting more jerks instead of going after the prince you deserve.0
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