Question for ladies with families....

kelsully

So there's me, my husband my 3 /12 year old son and my 1 year old daughter. My husband hates vegetables, maybe likes only 4 or 5 fruits, loves red meat and bacon and sausage, is lactose intolerant, o doesnt drink milk, but still insists on eating cheese, pasta and bread.(And hes diabetic :noway: ) my kids are starting to stick their noses up at veggies because dad does. Well, I do the shopping for the household. I do ALL of the cooking. Should I just start making meals and either him and the kids eat or they don't?? I'm sick of making different things for everyone!!!! Any help or suggestions are greatly appreciated!!

My husband takes a serving of vegetables about the same size as the kids' servings....one scoop. He and I agreed that he can eat one bite of veggies or more if he likes it to help the kids see that even if it is not our favorite we "give it a fair shake"

That is the rule in my house, the kids have known the rule since they could talk. They do not have to like anything. They have to give something a fair shake. If they behave politely they can have another option. So if I put carrots on their plate, they must take the "fair shake" decent sized bite. They cannot whine. They cannot argue. If they do not like the carrots they must say politely "This is not my favorite, may I have some apple slices as my fruit of veggie tonight?" (whatever works...when they were littler they just said may I have something else?" The kids are 5, 8, 10 and 11 now and they try to help me now by not just saying "This is not my favorite" but also trying to explain what they do not like as they are learning that I will do my best to listen. they might not like a texture, the seasoning, the sauce, how rich it is etc. They are learning the more I listen to what they like and don't like the more I try to present good choices they will like.

nataliefamily3

Nip that in the bud NOW! Your kids are so young they are still building preferences...i would only cook one meal include something you know hubs likes and if there are veggies he does not like he can pick them out without saying ewww gross or anytjing. You should never discourage healthy eating I have 2 yr old and often prepare veggies I dont like so he and I both get used to them. Myparents never encoraged veggie eating I wish they did.

jak12345

I was kind of meat and potatoes guy myself, but genetics and poor eating habits caught up with me and I'm a diabetic now too. It has been difficult, but I've started to do more of the cooking and meal planning. I've gradually started to wean myself off from some of the less healthier food. I would encourage you to slowly start to change the diet for the whole family. Less red meats and smaller portions, and using fruits as snacks and deserts ( a banana with a hint of peanut butter and a drizzle of chocolate). Have you tried vegetables on the grill (sweet onions, peppers, zucchini) or kabobs? They are very tasty and would be a good start. Cheese sauces can be great on cauliflower and broccoli -- a little higher in calories, but again it is a start. Some meals are great without meat -- Darn Good chili is a family favorite that I spice up onions, fire roasted tomatoes, chopped green peppers and more -- no one even misses the meat. Go with whole grain pastas, reduce the amount of red meat and sneak more veges in the sauce. Everyone will be healthier and with the price of meat you'll save money as well -- good luck!

terijoestoes

2 signs in my kitchen "two choices for dinner :take it or leave it " and "if mama ain't happy ain't nobody happy ". Your kids are not going to learn any younger how to eat healthy. If your husband doesn't care sbout his own health maybe he would about the children's and yours. Can you talk with him about this?

MoniMoni2u

My husband ate corn and green beans when we met.

I did what any inventive mother would do to get her child to eat new veggies...I started by adding a little cheese sauce! LOL Broccoli and cauliflower this worked well for!

I incorporated more veggies in his salad. Fresh spinach is a powerhouse and if the leaves are small, it isn't bitter.

Also, roasted veggies are wonderful.

We now eat all of the these veggies roasted (not only roasted but other ways too:) Broccoli, cauliflower, onions, eggplant, zuchini, green peppers.

We love veggies and some fruits grilled too.

kmsairam

I often put out but up fruit or raw veggies while I am cooking dinnner. It's amazing how the kids will eat them when they are so hungry. They will keep running back in to eat them. No sense cooking them or serving them WITH dinner, just get them in first. A little low fat ranch dressing makes a reasonable dip. Baby carrots, sliced cucumber or celery, cherry tomatoes, etc. Sliced apples or oranges, strawberries, etc. Put them out on a pretty plate like you would for guests.

This is a great idea. I've done it before and am astounded when my husband and kids gobble them up. But I'm also in the "eat it or starve camp." I serve veggies/protein/carb with every meal and the kids are expected to at least take a few bites. My husband is pretty good about veggies, though, so that makes it easier. Not sure what you can do about your husband, but you CAN influence what your kids eat by just giving them the healthy food you are eating.

pumpkinspice84

I use to cook seprate things and it drove me crazy. I will only do that if it is something spicy that the kids can't eat. My rule now is you either eat or you don't. I would tell my husband to keep his opinion to himself infront of the kids. Mine are a bit picky with veggies too and it wouldn't help having my husband make comments.

nancycaregiver

Fix this now or your kids may end up like my youngest!!! My first 2 sons ate what I cooked. They ate fruits, veggies and meats. Of course there were things they did not like but there was always plenty at the table they liked. Then I had my third child. When he was 2 weeks old, we went for his checkup and he was still under his birth weight. I went back the next day and he lost another half pound. The next day...same thing. He was losing weight daily. I was nursing him so we went to a lactation nurse for help. He was just not getting enough. The other 2 had done great so I was really surprised. I tried giving him a bottle to supplement but he would not take a bottle. They gave me a large tube with very fine tubing going down with a small hole in it. I would put breast milk in the tube, hold the end of the tubing on the tip of my finger, put my finger in his mouth, and literally pour the milk down his throat. It worked and he started gaining. As he grew, he was eating a good variety of baby food and moved on into table food. He loved my homemade chicken vegetable soup! Then when he was almost 2, he got pneumonia. He did not eat a crumb of food for 7 days. Hen he finally did eat, it was crackers but I was so happy, I just shoved crackers in him. Then he added cookies. That was all he ate for a long time (along with a vitamin daily!). We have worked so hard to get him to eat healthy but at 14 years old, he eats no vegetables, rarely eats fruits. He eats pop tarts, pizza, cereal, popcorn chicken, and yogurt. Those are they "healthy" things he eats willingly. I believe if I had pushed him when he was very young, we would not be where we are now. He looks healthy, in fact, quite thin. He is 5' 10" and weighs 142. He is very active. He does not eat very much or very often. I blame myself for this and now I know my son will have lifelong health problems because of my negligence. Please don't let this happen to your babies. Do something now while they are still young. If Dad is not going to eat right in front of the kids, don't let him sit at the table with you and the kids when you eat so that you are the one setting the example for them. Surely Dad knows that his eating habits are not good. Appeal to his senses as a father. Ask him if he wants to pass on his eating habits as a legacy to his children or do something to make their lives better.

RMNPHike

I often put out but up fruit or raw veggies while I am cooking dinnner. It's amazing how the kids will eat them when they are so hungry. They will keep running back in to eat them. No sense cooking them or serving them WITH dinner, just get them in first. A little low fat ranch dressing makes a reasonable dip. Baby carrots, sliced cucumber or celery, cherry tomatoes, etc. Sliced apples or oranges, strawberries, etc. Put them out on a pretty plate like you would for guests.

This!! I did this too when my kids were young. I also found out things they actually liked in their salad and put it on the side so they could add it. I serve the salad first when everyone is hungry, and take my time with the rest.

daklex

Honestly, I did not read all the responses, but I've been hiding onions and mushrooms IN.EVERY.LUNCH/DINNER for the past 6 years for the skids.

Cauliflower in mac and cheese
Squash, real tomatoes in spaghetti sauce
Anything pureed in homemade pizza (in the sauce, covered in cheese)
Anything in lasagne, manacotti, stuffed shells
Anything in Mexican (tacos, lasagna, etc)
Faux meats - soy crumbles in any of the above

It's really easy, just be imaginative. Ask me if you have a specific recipe you want to hide something in.

I've even gotten the skids eating veggie risottos without knowing!

blu_meanie_ca

I should ammend... if I want a very low cal meal, I will make that for myself, and something else for hub and kids. If he wants bacon and eggs for breakfast I make heart papliation and explosion sounds until he gets mad at me and settles for eggs and an apple.

212ackley

I am pretty fortunate to have a nonpicky household, but in the instance something is made that someone doesn't care for, they've got the option of eating leftovers or making a sandwich. No new meals will be made! My hubby is a seasonal worker and does all of the cooking and cleaning during the winter months, I do it during the summer...fair system for us!

punkrockmama

I totally blogged about this once.
But of also like to add that most veggies suck because most people don't know how to prepare them.
Steaming/boiling/microwaving vegetable is disgusting. As are most frozen and canned vegetables.
Try introducing fresh vegetables and roasting or sautéing them.
Also, serve dinner family style and allow your oldest to seve himself. Don't freak. He'll eventually start picking healthy items too! Ad put a little bit of everything on your daughters plate. Same rule! Don't freak!
Good luck and don't give up.

And regarding your husband; if he doesn't want to do it for himself then maybe you can encourage him to at least try during family meals so your children don't also end up diabetics.

X's.

WAHMto5

I have 5 children so I make 1 dinner and that is it! We always have a full dinner with a fruit, veggie, main dish, and bread. There has to be at least one thing they will eat or there is cereal;)

Mokey41

you'd think so, but no. He was never taught how to cook ANYTHING! He cant even make toast withought burning it. It's pretty sad. His mom always taught him that's why you find a wife. Ugh. And I tried to teach him to cook. After 5 minutes he says"I don't have patience for this" and leaves.

I received a husband in exactly the same shape 34 years ago. He learned really quickly that if he didn't smarten up he might very well starve to death. I didn't care if he couldn't make tap water because he's a functioning adult in all other respects so he could figure it out. He quickly learned to eat what was put on his plate and he also learned to cook. I had a meeting after work last night and come home to a lovely dinner he had prepared.

He's your husband, your equal, not your mentally challenged 3rd child!

mogzBH

I will only ever cook a seperate meal if I really want to eat something that someonelse in the house is allergic to, and then it is my choice.
My fiance and I are pretty good with eating most things that are put in front of us but I must admit that he has had to coax and encourage me over the past few years to eat fish ( I only ever ate it if trying to be polite at someone's house!) , which culminated in a huge victory last autumn when I bought my first whole fish from the fish monger and had to prepare the whole thing before we cooked and ate it. I'm still not a huge fan but I wouldn't dream of refusing a plate of fish now as I know its not so bad.
Sneak in some extra veg to sauces, stick loads of delicious fruits on their deserts and get them snacking on some carrots and celery sticks with low fat cream cheese, yummers!

skinnyinnotime

You're not running a restaurant. You cook as you've been doing, healthy meals with veg and they take it or leave it.

In our house there is no option to leave it, the food is good for them so they need to eat it.

My hubby didn't eat much veg when we first met, but he's totally changed. He does most of the cooking and veg is served with every meal.

Netgrrrl22

What if you made something like spaghetti squash with meat sauce or egg plant lazagna (or spinach instead of the noodles).
What about things like tacos? Meals where the vegetables are hidden in the meal

Cyndieann

Do something now while they are still young. If Dad is not going to eat right in front of the kids, don't let him sit at the table with you and the kids when you eat so that you are the one setting the example for them. Surely Dad knows that his eating habits are not good. Appeal to his senses as a father. Ask him if he wants to pass on his eating habits as a legacy to his children or do something to make their lives better.

This....and, you are not operating a restaurant!!! The habits your kids get into now will affect them forever, you know this I'm sure. If you are in charge of the kitchen, then TAKE CHARGE!!! When your kids are healthy adults who eat well without a second thought, they will appreciate your efforts in their youth. When your healthy husband is playing with his grandchildren, he'll be thanking you too!

OakesMomOf2

Just like kids...A husband will eat whatever if fixed for him, if he gets hungry enough. lol... But seriously, find new/healthy food that the whole family can try together and always work in new recipes. That way they can't say they don't like it, if they have never tried it.