Will Coffee Enemas help me lose weight?

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  • SatchGallamax
    SatchGallamax Posts: 549 Member
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    They put caffeine in face creams to help firm up the skin, so maybe this would help firm up the *kitten*?
  • PikaKnight
    PikaKnight Posts: 34,971 Member
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    Seems South Park had it right in the episode - "How to Eat Through Your Butt"
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
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    What a waste of coffee. You can't taste coffee in your bum. :laugh:
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
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    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
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    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.
  • Danger2OneSelf
    Danger2OneSelf Posts: 883 Member
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    If you use them in reverse with Alcohol you get drunk with out the calories....think about that :drinker:
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
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    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.

    a coffee enema? You do know what that is right?

    Atleast with colon cleanse you don't have to go through all the pointless pain or awkwardness.
    They're just pills. The ones I have are all natural.
    I was recommended them as I have some issues with my stomach and gi tract.
    After having a colonoscopy, I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum.
  • Crankstr
    Crankstr Posts: 3,958 Member
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    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.

    a coffee enema? You do know what that is right?

    Atleast with colon cleanse you don't have to go through all the pointless pain or awkwardness.
    They're just pills. The ones I have are all natural.
    I was recommended them as I have some issues with my stomach and gi tract.
    After having a colonoscopy, I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum.

    doesnt sound too healthy to me.
  • Danger2OneSelf
    Danger2OneSelf Posts: 883 Member
    Options
    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.

    a coffee enema? You do know what that is right?

    Atleast with colon cleanse you don't have to go through all the pointless pain or awkwardness.
    They're just pills. The ones I have are all natural.
    I was recommended them as I have some issues with my stomach and gi tract.
    After having a colonoscopy, I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum.

    Umm ever think that some people might enjoy living on the edge....cmon
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
    Options
    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.

    a coffee enema? You do know what that is right?

    Atleast with colon cleanse you don't have to go through all the pointless pain or awkwardness.
    They're just pills. The ones I have are all natural.
    I was recommended them as I have some issues with my stomach and gi tract.
    After having a colonoscopy, I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum.

    doesnt sound too healthy to me.

    According to a Health Professional it is.

    Think about it.
    1. have you ever had a colonscopy? The prep they put you through cleans your entire system out. I'll tell you this in all honesty, I felt better after being cleaned out that I ever have before. Healthier.
    2. You carry up to ten pounds of built up bile in your body at all times. You don't want to clean that out and feel lighter, healthier, and cleaner?
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
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    ...I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum...

    A professional what? Doctor? Lawyer? Indian Chief?
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
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    ...I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum...

    A professional what? Doctor? Lawyer? Indian Chief?

    A professional gastro dr.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
    Options
    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.

    a coffee enema? You do know what that is right?

    Atleast with colon cleanse you don't have to go through all the pointless pain or awkwardness.
    They're just pills. The ones I have are all natural.
    I was recommended them as I have some issues with my stomach and gi tract.
    After having a colonoscopy, I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum.

    doesnt sound too healthy to me.

    According to a Health Professional it is.

    Think about it.
    1. have you ever had a colonscopy? The prep they put you through cleans your entire system out. I'll tell you this in all honesty, I felt better after being cleaned out that I ever have before. Healthier.
    2. You carry up to ten pounds of built up bile in your body at all times. You don't want to clean that out and feel lighter, healthier, and cleaner?

    That's complete and utter delusional nonsense. Coffee is pretty natural- certainly not LESS natural than your pills, and doing any sort of laxative "cleanse" (senna being a 'natural' laxative) disrupts your gut bacteria, messes with the muscle contractions of your digestive system risking permanent long term damage, and is, in my opinion, loosely-veiled socially acceptable bulimia. Good luck with it though. Glad to hear it works for you.
  • Danger2OneSelf
    Danger2OneSelf Posts: 883 Member
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    Think about it.
    1. have you ever had a colonscopy? The prep they put you through cleans your entire system out. I'll tell you this in all honesty, I felt better after being cleaned out that I ever have before. Healthier.
    2. You carry up to ten pounds of built up bile in your body at all times. You don't want to clean that out and feel lighter, healthier, and cleaner?

    Ok, in all serious now. I've had two colonoscopies and granted the procedure isn't bad (your normally under anesthesia) that laxative they give you for the night before is no joke. I thought I was going to poop my organs out and it messed with my bowels for weeks. Do not go down that path :noway:
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
    Options
    I wouldn't go as far as a coffee enema. I take colon cleanse stuff which helps keep you clean and healthy.
    I'd start with something along those lines first.

    What's the difference, really? They're both just stimulant laxatives.

    a coffee enema? You do know what that is right?

    Atleast with colon cleanse you don't have to go through all the pointless pain or awkwardness.
    They're just pills. The ones I have are all natural.
    I was recommended them as I have some issues with my stomach and gi tract.
    After having a colonoscopy, I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum.

    doesnt sound too healthy to me.

    According to a Health Professional it is.

    Think about it.
    1. have you ever had a colonscopy? The prep they put you through cleans your entire system out. I'll tell you this in all honesty, I felt better after being cleaned out that I ever have before. Healthier.
    2. You carry up to ten pounds of built up bile in your body at all times. You don't want to clean that out and feel lighter, healthier, and cleaner?

    That's complete and utter delusional nonsense. Coffee is pretty natural- certainly not LESS natural than your pills, and doing any sort of laxative "cleanse" (senna being a 'natural' laxative) disrupts your gut bacteria, messes with the muscle contractions of your digestive system risking permanent long term damage, and is, in my opinion, loosely-veiled socially acceptable bulimia. Good luck with it though. Glad to hear it works for you.

    Didn't say it was more natural.
    But it is ALL NATURAL.
    and being all natural it doesn't disrupt ANYTHING.
    You poop anyways right? seriously, why not clean out THE BAD STUFF!!
    Doing it one a month, or once every three months is GOOD FOR YOU.
    Coming from someone who had GI issues her WHOLE LIFE.
    and Coming from the opinion of my doctor. I think he knows a bit more about the GI tract than you.

    It is far from bulimia, as I don't do it to lose weight, I do it for my health. I'd rather not have to go in for another colonoscopy.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
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    ...I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum...

    A professional what? Doctor? Lawyer? Indian Chief?

    A professional gastro dr.

    ...so, a gastroenterologist? Or Dr. Oz?
  • Danger2OneSelf
    Danger2OneSelf Posts: 883 Member
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    Unless you want to turn your bathroom into your new living room, I wouldn't suggest it. Coffee enemas or any enema or laxitive isn't going to help you loose (actual) weight as in body fat. It just makes you loose a ton of water weight and some fecal matter. Seriously if you want to loose weight the only sure way to do it is hard work and strict diet....no exceptions
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
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    ...I was told by a professional that is actually a really good idea to take the colon cleanse and keep all the built up bile to a minimum...

    A professional what? Doctor? Lawyer? Indian Chief?

    A professional gastro dr.

    ...so, a gastroenterologist? Or Dr. Oz?

    My gastroenterologist. I'm not stupid, but thanks for trying to make me that way (:
  • ChelseaYepThatsMe
    ChelseaYepThatsMe Posts: 457
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    Unless you want to turn your bathroom into your new living room, I wouldn't suggest it. Coffee enemas or any enema or laxitive isn't going to help you loose (actual) weight as in body fat. It just makes you loose a ton of water weight and some fecal matter. Seriously if you want to loose weight the only sure way to do it is hard work and strict diet....no exceptions

    ^^agreed
  • BurtHuttz
    BurtHuttz Posts: 3,653 Member
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    It's weird, I've eaten and crapped throughout my life in the same way we have for hundreds of centuries. I haven't needed any sort of cleansing. When in human history was this frailty of ours discovered?

    Probably with the first dude needing a plausible explanation for why he enjoys putting things up his rectum.

    Edited to add: Sorry, not trying to gang up, mine is a general comment.

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