Morbidly Obese mother files complaint
Replies
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Actually....unless you have a specific health issue...people just don't mysteriously get fat...especially when you're talking being 100-200 lbs overweight.The doctor shouldn't have lied and said something was policy when it isn't but the doctor always has a right to make his recommendation and its up to the lady if she wants to go with what he recommended or to make a bad choice. Obviously she was making bad choices already to get to 353 but its her body.
Not everyone who is fat made "bad choices" to get there. Thanks for playing.0 -
The doctor shouldn't have lied and said something was policy when it isn't but the doctor always has a right to make his recommendation and its up to the lady if she wants to go with what he recommended or to make a bad choice. Obviously she was making bad choices already to get to 353 but its her body.
Not everyone who is fat made "bad choices" to get there. Thanks for playing.
Let me guess, you have a thyroid disorder that makes you fat and makes it impossible to lose weight? :noway:
Nope, but plenty of people do.
Your lack of direct discussion regarding on the topic at hand paired with your abrupt comments that don't add educational or supported information for your stances really invalidates your posts and only makes you seem bitter. You may get further with the audience if you were willing to actual provide or share information and perspective.0 -
I can agree that an overweight person is not necessarily less healthy than a thin person. However, the more overweight you are, the more at risk you are for certain medical issues and/or conditions. It is not guaranteed that you will experience them, however, there IS a higher risk.
In the same way, if you are older than 35, your pregnancy is considered high-risk. You may very well be extremely healthy in terms of bloodwork and physical fitness, but it does not change the fact that you are at risk in certain ways. A responsible doctor will be making sure that the proper precautions are taken IN CASE something goes wrong. I'm sorry, but if a doctor told me that due to my age, I should deliver at a different hospital with more specialized care in case of complications, I would not accuse him or her of discriminating against me due to my age. I would not even check if it was hospital policy because if they are making decisions based on what they feel is the safest for me and my baby, then that is what I would want as well.
We know that over a certain age, we are immediately at higher-risk for certain conditions. If we are genetically lucky or if we do the hard work to take care of our bodies, we can reduce those risks greatly. But we do not start criticizing the world for age discrimination and call for more "age acceptance."
I also take issue with people who accuse others of "shaming." You can TRY to shame me for whatever you like, but I can choose for myself whether your opinion will make me feel ashamed or not. You can't shame me unless I give you that power.0 -
The doctor shouldn't have lied and said something was policy when it isn't but the doctor always has a right to make his recommendation and its up to the lady if she wants to go with what he recommended or to make a bad choice. Obviously she was making bad choices already to get to 353 but its her body.
Not everyone who is fat made "bad choices" to get there. Thanks for playing.
Let me guess, you have a thyroid disorder that makes you fat and makes it impossible to lose weight? :noway:
Nope, but plenty of people do.
Roughly 16% averaged across the US population.
And it doesn't generally contribute to someone being extremely morbidly obese.0 -
GREAT contribution to the discussion, Sara! Here's a gold star!There are a lot of people on here
That was unnecessary. Maybe Sara is trying to bring a bit of levity to a pretty heavy discussion. I'll admit that I chuckled at her comment and read it as something along the lines of "I love lamp."0 -
Morbid obesity is by definition unhealthy. MO is a disease process so for those of us who are obese, we are unhealthy. Fatt acceptance should not even be a term in our lexicon because we should never accept any disease process and try to disguise it as some sort of personal choice or civil right. I do not believe obese people should be discriminated against; however, there are well documented problems caused during pregnancy by obesity. Frankly, I find anyone who gets pregnant, is obese and tries to justify her obesity to be selfish just like a smoker who gets pregnant. Having once weight 400 pounds and being "healthy" I can tell you I was fooling myself. I have lost nearly 150 pounds and despite having near stellar lab values and vital signs, running several miles per week and eating healtheir, I am still obese and therefore not completely healthy. Obesity is an epidemic in our society because we want what we want when we want it and we refuse to accept the harsh reality that our bodies are designed to ingest and burn a certain number of calories per day. If you try to justify this woman's actions you are part of the problem.
The thing is that you cant just quit being fat like you can quit smoking.
You are correct that for a small percentage of obese people who possess a metabolism disorder, they cannot just stop being fat. However, the overwhelming majority of obese people, me included, became fat from making bad choices.
How is eating at a calorie surplus a "bad' choice? Is it somehow immoral to eat at a calorie surplus?
Yes actually, it is called gluttony. Bibilical morality aside, it is selfish because those of us who are obese and continue to be so without making changes, impact others. The cost of healthcare is proportional to obesity related disease. The carbon footprint of nations whose population is obese is much higher. The cost of living is higher because consumption drives demand which drives pricing. Not to mention, we in the West consume, consume and consume while much of the world struggles to provide the bare minimum nurtition if that. You are woefully misinformed mam.0 -
A doctor can't just refuse care to a patient. That seems pretty counter intuitive. "Oh, you have health problems. I don't want to be liable if something goes wrong and you or your child die. Just go somewhere else." Um, no.0
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The doctor shouldn't have lied and said something was policy when it isn't but the doctor always has a right to make his recommendation and its up to the lady if she wants to go with what he recommended or to make a bad choice. Obviously she was making bad choices already to get to 353 but its her body.
Not everyone who is fat made "bad choices" to get there. Thanks for playing.
Let me guess, you have a thyroid disorder that makes you fat and makes it impossible to lose weight? :noway:
This really hits close to home. If you are curious why, you can read my blog, http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/UsedToBeHusky.
The fact of the matter is, that not everyone is obese or morbidly obese because they made choices to be. This is the reason why fat tolerance, if nothing else, is an important social issue. Just because you can see that someone is obese, but you can't see why they are obese, does not mean that individual should be despised or treated without respsect. Honestly, regardless of anything, no one deserves to be treated with disrespect, and that is why the terms "fat acceptance" and "fat discrimination" have become buzz words in modern media. If you can look at a person, see their flaws, and then use those flaws as a reason to hate them, then you are discriminating against that individual, irregardless of your rationale behind it.0 -
The fact of the matter is that people are going to be held more accountable for their health if they want insurance and quality care. This is the way the medical industry is going and should go. I've worked for a large community hospital for the last six years in the finance department while I pursue my nursing degrees. All the insurance changes are focusing on patient responsibilities....frankly it cost more money to insure a 350lbs woman than it does a 150lbs woman. FACT. The doctor obviously agreed to care for this patient, but he doesn't have to...he has a choice. He gave her the option of delivery at a better equipped hospital, not her hospital of choice...she should be grateful that he cares enough to state the hard truths. You cannot be healthy and without risk factors at 350lbs. She has put a strain on every organ in her body, and her fetus. She needs to STFU and deal with her own health risks and stop pointing the finger of blame on her doctor.
and for the record I do not refute the fact that there are plenty of reason someone could become obese, not all of them due to poor choices....I concede, but it is still a fact that the more overweight you are the more risk factors you have for serious health issues.0 -
Me too. I don't think there's any mother out there who wouldn't want to know what hospital they would be delivering their baby in so they could check the track record.If this was her OBGYN doctor, I would think that this would have been established way before the delivery.
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ninerbuff, this is what surprises me most of all about the whole thing. Why did this come up so far into her pregnancy? I'm pregnant now (due a couple of weeks after this lady), and I pre-registered with the hospital months ago. That was discussed at my first visit, even though I already had my son at the same hospital with the same OB. She still had to go over it with me to make sure we were both on the same page. I don't think she'd have been too thrilled if I walked into her office on Monday and mentioned how I'd planned on delivering at home or at another hospital where she doesn't have privileges.
A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
GREAT contribution to the discussion, Sara! Here's a gold star!There are a lot of people on here
That was unnecessary. Maybe Sara is trying to bring a bit of levity to a pretty heavy discussion. I'll admit that I chuckled at her comment and read it as something along the lines of "I love lamp."
No need to be an *kitten*. My lappy had a wobbler and posted before i had finished. So have your gold star back.0 -
Body shaming? Fat acceptance? These terms are indicative of everything that is wrong with our society today. There is zero rationale in accepting obesity period end of story. If you are obese you should love yourself enough to work toward resolving it. Will you succeed? I do not know. Should obese people be ostricized or discriminated against, of course not. There is a huge difference though between not discriminating or hating obesity and loving yourself obese. The middle ground should be that obesity is a disease, a deadly one. To be obese and refuse to work toward change is selfish period. You are depriving yourself and more importantly your loved ones of years of life. Losing weight is absurdly difficult. I was fortunate to have LapBand which put me on the road. I am not saying that failing to lose weight is failing, but failing to recognize obesity as a disease and making the mental and physical changes required is an absolute fail!
Being fat isn't a disease.
But in your last remark you sad not all people get fat by making bad choices... So which is it? A choice or a disease?
A body type.
Um no. Good lord this is why obesity is such an epidemic in this damn country! Gah!0 -
Morbid obesity is by definition unhealthy. MO is a disease process so for those of us who are obese, we are unhealthy. Fatt acceptance should not even be a term in our lexicon because we should never accept any disease process and try to disguise it as some sort of personal choice or civil right. I do not believe obese people should be discriminated against; however, there are well documented problems caused during pregnancy by obesity. Frankly, I find anyone who gets pregnant, is obese and tries to justify her obesity to be selfish just like a smoker who gets pregnant. Having once weight 400 pounds and being "healthy" I can tell you I was fooling myself. I have lost nearly 150 pounds and despite having near stellar lab values and vital signs, running several miles per week and eating healtheir, I am still obese and therefore not completely healthy. Obesity is an epidemic in our society because we want what we want when we want it and we refuse to accept the harsh reality that our bodies are designed to ingest and burn a certain number of calories per day. If you try to justify this woman's actions you are part of the problem.
The thing is that you cant just quit being fat like you can quit smoking.
You are correct that for a small percentage of obese people who possess a metabolism disorder, they cannot just stop being fat. However, the overwhelming majority of obese people, me included, became fat from making bad choices.
How is eating at a calorie surplus a "bad' choice? Is it somehow immoral to eat at a calorie surplus?
bad =/= immoral. Bad can also mean "inferior quality," a decision can be of inferior quality, the deicision to eat at a surplus can therefore be both a bad choice and have absolutly no baring on morality.0 -
A doctor can't just refuse care to a patient. That seems pretty counter intuitive. "Oh, you have health problems. I don't want to be liable if something goes wrong and you or your child die. Just go somewhere else." Um, no.
A doctor should refuse to treat a patient if they cannot properly treat them. This doctor said I cannot treat you any longer, but here's a place you can go. It's not like he just shoved this woman out into the cold and said "Delivery your baby on your own! Have fun!"
I'd rather my doctor say "I just can't properly treat you. Here's a couple of options, let me know if I can help" versus the doctor crossing their fingers and hoping for the best. THAT is what opens you up to liability.0 -
That is really sad. Maybe giving birth to this child will be her wake up call to get healthy. The way she's whining though, she's probably used to getting her way and it ticked her off because she was told the word NO.. I worked in the medical field and protocol is protocol. You can't change it and if you do, you lose your license.. She will have to suck it up, go to the dif hosp or good luck to her trying a home birth. Yikes.0
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The doctor was wrong to lie and if he has no medical reason to move her to another hospital, she should be allowed to have her baby there. Although I do agree that at 353 pounds she is not healthy and should stop lying to herself. I estimate that my older sister weighs anywhere between 425-525 pounds. She refuses to lose weight because she doesn't have any health problems. It's hard for me to understand that way of thinking. I knew that at 270 pounds, I was not healthy and it wasn't just because I had high blood pressure. It was also because I couldn't walk for long periods of time without needing to rest and my knees were always achy. It sounds to me that the Doctor put this conversation off until the last minute. He should've have talked with her about the potential for complications early in her pregnancy and allowed her to make the decision.0
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For what it's worth....assuming someone walking down the road (who is overweight, obese, whatever) is some unhealthy slob is not appropriate. This is where "fat acceptance" comes into play....aka...treat all people, regardless of weight, with dignity and respect. Period. I think these terms just create larger divides in our society.
But people who get bent out of shape for having a DOCTOR try and point them in a better direction or saying they can't treat you and throwing up the discrimination flag, is absurd in my opinion.0 -
The doctor shouldn't have lied and said something was policy when it isn't but the doctor always has a right to make his recommendation and its up to the lady if she wants to go with what he recommended or to make a bad choice. Obviously she was making bad choices already to get to 353 but its her body.
Not everyone who is fat made "bad choices" to get there. Thanks for playing.
Let me guess, you have a thyroid disorder that makes you fat and makes it impossible to lose weight? :noway:
This really hits close to home. If you are curious why, you can read my blog, http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/UsedToBeHusky.
The fact of the matter is, that not everyone is obese or morbidly obese because they made choices to be. This is the reason why fat tolerance, if nothing else, is an important social issue. Just because you can see that someone is obese, but you can't see why they are obese, does not mean that individual should be despised or treated without respsect. Honestly, regardless of anything, no one deserves to be treated with disrespect, and that is why the terms "fat acceptance" and "fat discrimination" have become buzz words in modern media. If you can look at a person, see their flaws, and then use those flaws as a reason to hate them, then you are discriminating against that individual, irregardless of your rationale behind it.
The problem I have is that we call it "fat acceptance" instead of "people acceptance". We continue to care out niches for those who are marginalized in society instead of focusing on loving and accepting all people. I will not condone obesity as an acceptable way of life for anyone, other than those who cannot medically lose weight any more than I will condone smoking, permiscuous sex or any other poor lifestyle choice. That, however, does not mean I do not accept obese people as my bretheren whom I love, nor does it mean I look upon them with scorn. We have become so sensitive in our society such that we can no longer be frank and honest with someone for fear of being called a bigot, discriminator or hater.0 -
Not disciminating, perhaps the hospital does not have the means to accomodate her weight so to ensure she recieves the best care possible perhaps this was the best option for the patient. Most doctors look out for the best interest of the patient. She must have recieved the information in the wrong way or it may even have been delivered to her in the wrong way but the doctor did the right thing.0
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My doctor told me I was fat, no...Morbidly Obese last week...
Ba*tard!!0 -
A doctor can't just refuse care to a patient. That seems pretty counter intuitive. "Oh, you have health problems. I don't want to be liable if something goes wrong and you or your child die. Just go somewhere else." Um, no.
There are situations where a doctor can lawfully refuse to treat a patient, and there are situations where s/he cannot do so. However, if a patient's care is beyond a doctor's expertise and/or s/he feels that s/he cannot provide proper care to the patient (and can provide an appropriate referral), it would be wise of him/her to refer the patient elsewhere.0 -
My doctor told me I was fat, no...Morbidly Obese last week...
Ba*tard!!
Let's string him/her up. They obviously don't accept you for the person that you are.0 -
You say obesity isn't a disease and isn't caused by bad choices, yet then you want to say that it's a body type or mostly caused by thyroid disease? Please.
It's not immoral to be inactive and eat too much, but then it also isn't immoral to smoke. Doesn't change the fact that it's bad for you.
Yes there are people out there that are overweight due to a thyroid problem or PCOS. They are a very small percentage of the overweight and obese and still doesn't automatically make you MORBIDLY obese. And there are many people on this very board that have overcome obstacles like thyroid or PCOS and still got down to at least a healthier weight. Maybe they won't ever look like a supermodel, but there is a huge difference between being a little fluffy and being 353 pounds. Plus the woman said herself she supposedly has no health issues other than obesity, so I doubt that she has any disease contributing to her obesity.
Numbers may be fine but the fact remains that should someone at that weight need a C section, they will need more drugs, more care and effort made into the surgery, and probably a bigger freaking operating table.
If you're happy with being morbidly obese, great, but if you don't fit into a plane seat you just don't fit into a plane seat. Suing the airline is not going to fix that.
I question why you're on this site if being obese is so dandy with you?
Thinking of fat people as lesser human beings is not okay, but neither is expecting special accommodations to magically appear when you are at an extreme size and then suing when you don't get it.0 -
The doctor shouldn't have lied and said something was policy when it isn't but the doctor always has a right to make his recommendation and its up to the lady if she wants to go with what he recommended or to make a bad choice. Obviously she was making bad choices already to get to 353 but its her body.
Not everyone who is fat made "bad choices" to get there. Thanks for playing.
Let me guess, you have a thyroid disorder that makes you fat and makes it impossible to lose weight? :noway:
This really hits close to home. If you are curious why, you can read my blog, http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/UsedToBeHusky.
The fact of the matter is, that not everyone is obese or morbidly obese because they made choices to be. This is the reason why fat tolerance, if nothing else, is an important social issue. Just because you can see that someone is obese, but you can't see why they are obese, does not mean that individual should be despised or treated without respsect. Honestly, regardless of anything, no one deserves to be treated with disrespect, and that is why the terms "fat acceptance" and "fat discrimination" have become buzz words in modern media. If you can look at a person, see their flaws, and then use those flaws as a reason to hate them, then you are discriminating against that individual, irregardless of your rationale behind it.
The problem I have is that we call it "fat acceptance" instead of "people acceptance". We continue to care out niches for those who are marginalized in society instead of focusing on loving and accepting all people. I will not condone obesity as an acceptable way of life for anyone, other than those who cannot medically lose weight any more than I will condone smoking, permiscuous sex or any other poor lifestyle choice. That, however, does not mean I do not accept obese people as my bretheren whom I love, nor does it mean I look upon them with scorn. We have become so sensitive in our society such that we can no longer be frank and honest with someone for fear of being called a bigot, discriminator or hater.
Yes, I can see your point there. I used that terminology only because it is the common vernacular. And just because you don't truly "hate" someone for their weight, doesn't mean that those people do not exist. Unfortunately, a few bad apples always spoil the bunch. I don't think our society has become too sensitive because discrimination has to be controlled. If we begin to overlook any potential for discrimination, then we are creating opportunity for other forms of discrimination to re-enter daily life.0 -
I am nine and a half months pregnant, and while I am not morbidly obese, I am still obese. I had just started losing weight when I became pregnant and have fought to stay healthy these past nine months. While my blood pressure, glucose, all my other tests have came back fine, the impact of being obese has severely affected being pregnant. I couldn't imagine another 100 lbs to deal with. I would have been just fine if my midwife had told me I needed to deliver at another hospital for better care. If it is helping my child, who gives a flying fudge? I made myself this unhealthy weight, no one else.
I can find no sympathy for this woman. I don't think this is a matter of fat acceptance at all. Her doctor was doing what was best, and she should be happy he/she is looking out for the best interest of her child. This is her physician, he/she didn't call her a bulbous slob and tell her to find another hospital.0 -
GREAT contribution to the discussion, Sara! Here's a gold star!There are a lot of people on here
That was unnecessary. Maybe Sara is trying to bring a bit of levity to a pretty heavy discussion. I'll admit that I chuckled at her comment and read it as something along the lines of "I love lamp."
No need to be an *kitten*. My lappy had a wobbler and posted before i had finished. So have your gold star back.
Hopefully you don't think I was trying to be an *kitten*
I thought you were being silly, and I actually appreciated it! I would give you a gold star if I had any, but, well, the price of gold is kinda high these days... 0 -
A doctor can't just refuse care to a patient. That seems pretty counter intuitive. "Oh, you have health problems. I don't want to be liable if something goes wrong and you or your child die. Just go somewhere else." Um, no.
There are situations where a doctor can lawfully refuse to treat a patient, and there are situations where s/he cannot do so. However, if a patient's care is beyond a doctor's expertise and/or s/he feels that s/he cannot provide proper care to the patient (and can provide an appropriate referral), it would be wise of him/her to refer the patient elsewhere.
Did I just actually read a well written, thought out response that is factually correct. That brings the tally to.....1.0 -
A doctor can't just refuse care to a patient. That seems pretty counter intuitive. "Oh, you have health problems. I don't want to be liable if something goes wrong and you or your child die. Just go somewhere else." Um, no.
There are situations where a doctor can lawfully refuse to treat a patient, and there are situations where s/he cannot do so. However, if a patient's care is beyond a doctor's expertise and/or s/he feels that s/he cannot provide proper care to the patient (and can provide an appropriate referral), it would be wise of him/her to refer the patient elsewhere.
A doctor most definatley can refuse to care for a patient. And depending on the type of hospital, they can too. The hospital I work has a high percentage of indigent care/medicaid and medicare patients, higher than most any other hospital in the state...we are required by law to treat any patient that presents until they are stabilezed for transport. Nothing more. However, we do not refuse patients and transport them out as soon as stabilized unless it is for something we cannot treat. We are not currently a trauma hospital so we do transport after stabilization for some traumas, never because the patient cannot pay.
So, yes, there is choice on both sides of the medical industry.0 -
I think the problem was the doctor wasnt forthcoming. Should have said look because of youre weight you are at risk for some serious complication that could possible mean the loss of your life or the baby could die (I think be as real and scary as possible). We have to get you to a hospital that can offer the most advanced care and the best trained personnel.
I wonder if she has to pay more at this other place or something too and thats why she's so pissed. I tell you that would be hella motivation for me to change my lifestyle.0 -
A doctor can't just refuse care to a patient. That seems pretty counter intuitive. "Oh, you have health problems. I don't want to be liable if something goes wrong and you or your child die. Just go somewhere else." Um, no.
There are situations where a doctor can lawfully refuse to treat a patient, and there are situations where s/he cannot do so. However, if a patient's care is beyond a doctor's expertise and/or s/he feels that s/he cannot provide proper care to the patient (and can provide an appropriate referral), it would be wise of him/her to refer the patient elsewhere.
Did I just actually read a well written, thought out response that is factually correct. That brings the tally to.....1.
Hehe, thanks. I try to be rational at least once a day.0
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