About to explode! (A vent)

oh_em_gee

If you love your pets, they are expensive, but they are also family - I get that, I have a dog and she is my whole entire world!!!

DO NOT EVER LET ANYONE PUT YOU DOWN FOR BEING AN ANIMAL LOVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I'd finish but I have a meeting... good luck and tell your mom to get her S*it together

This. I have three cats and would never, ever give up my animals. They are family and have no way of fending for themselves - therefore, I must take care of them.

Do not give them up. As long as you are able to responsibly care for them, they are yours.

I like my cats more than I like 99% of people. But, what will happen when she's looking for a rental is a valid concern, as are the feelings of the people that owns the house she lives in

Manda86

Because that's feasible for everyone in this economy.

Somebody already beat that drum, but

Umeboshi

Because that's feasible for everyone in this economy.

Somebody already beat that drum, but

Oh, right. Only one post per opinion per thread. Ok. Guess the thread is over.

JustJennie1

If you love your pets, they are expensive, but they are also family - I get that, I have a dog and she is my whole entire world!!!

DO NOT EVER LET ANYONE PUT YOU DOWN FOR BEING AN ANIMAL LOVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I'd finish but I have a meeting... good luck and tell your mom to get her S*it together

This. I have three cats and would never, ever give up my animals. They are family and have no way of fending for themselves - therefore, I must take care of them.

Do not give them up. As long as you are able to responsibly care for them, they are yours.

I like my cats more than I like 99% of people. But, what will happen when she's looking for a rental is a valid concern, as are the feelings of the people that owns the house she lives in

Exactly this. There aren't a lot of apartments out there that actually allow pets and for valid reasons.

oh_em_gee

seriously........if you feel like you are grown up enough to be married then you need to move outta your mommies house.

Because that's feasible for everyone in this economy.

No, it's not, and I don't think that anyone has said it is. But, if you want to live by your own rules with your fiancé and a mini menagerie, it may be a necessary prerequisite

Peanutbutterx

maybe he should move out for a little while and back with his parents until you both save up enough to get married an get your own place together, and you could split up the animals, he takes some to his house and you keep some at yours. im sure your mom would be a lot nicer to you if he wasnt there and you guys would be able to see eachother in a not so stressful situation. this time with your mom is important because once you move out and get married your goin to miss her. try n spend some time with your mom with out him there n see him outside your house. that way you two can just focus on saving up to move out an get married. and if i would him i would sell that truck if he can and get a cheaper used car and put the rest of the money toward your savings for a house

Manda86

Oh, right. Only one post per opinion per thread. Ok. Guess the thread is over.

I'll see you to the door.

Umeboshi

seriously........if you feel like you are grown up enough to be married then you need to move outta your mommies house.

Because that's feasible for everyone in this economy.

No, it's not, and I don't think that anyone has said it is. But, if you want to live by your own rules with your fiancé and a mini menagerie, it may be a necessary prerequisite

Not arguing that point. I still can't wrap my head around the $30,000 truck purchase.

JustJennie1

seriously........if you feel like you are grown up enough to be married then you need to move outta your mommies house.

Because that's feasible for everyone in this economy.

There's HUD housing which is affordable for anyone or low income housing. And no, not all low income and HUD housing is inhabited by crack heads and hookers. When I moved out the apartment I got was low income housing and it was in a great neighborhood and the apartment was gorgeous. My rent was based on how much I made and it was very low and affordable. Regardless of the economy there are housing options out there for people who don't make a lot of money. And if you read her post they both have jobs.

MagicalLeopleurodon

Let me say-the truck is due to him having used, $2000-3000 vehicles that were always breaking down. we saved for months and traded a broken down car to make payments. he travels a lot-we needed a wareanty and something 100% reliable.

The animals are going nowhere. We live with mom-and she would likely skin my hide for getting rid of them too. to me, its like suggesting giving up my choldren due to finance issues.

we are saving, building credit, and actively looking for oir own place. the pets dont cost $40/month alltogether. like i said, we pay utilities, groceries, etc.

i cook, clean, and care. i make sure everyone is fed a homemade meal and has clean work clothes. i keep the pets bathed, walked, traoned, snd keep litterboxes clean. i dont hesitate to offer my money to pay for someones gas who is struggling, and my mom and fiance are the same way.

we are looking at remodeling because we live here-we want to make it ours too. right now the house still has hurricane damage-id rather stay longer and leave my mom with a nice house than get out and leave it in the condition its in-even if that means we stay longer.

i wasnt wanting advice but di really appreciate every bit of it. im just stretched thin (we all are) and starting to panic over the day-to-days.
its just one of those days where nothing is working and i cant figure out how to fix it begore it stresses my mom or fiance out.

Peanutbutterx

buy your mommy some flowers!! if my mom comes home and i have flowers for her shes in a good mood no matter what (pink roses!)

oh_em_gee

I do get a lot of what you're going through. Living at home as an adult isn't always easy. And I have strict parents, and so does the bf, so we get to hang out in his basement like we're in high school still. But, it's something we unfortunately have to deal with until one of us gets a job that we can live on. It's discouraging, because that could be a couple years, but we have to be patient. Savings aren't even our issue, but we don't have the income to sustain life on our own.

Umeboshi

seriously........if you feel like you are grown up enough to be married then you need to move outta your mommies house.

Because that's feasible for everyone in this economy.

There's HUD housing which is affordable for anyone or low income housing. And no, not all low income and HUD housing is inhabited by crack heads and hookers. When I moved out the apartment I got was low income housing and it was in a great neighborhood and the apartment was gorgeous. My rent was based on how much I made and it was very low and affordable. Regardless of the economy there are housing options out there for people who don't make a lot of money. And if you read her post they both have jobs.

Living with her mother is still probably more affordable than any low-income housing though. Honestly, there's nothing wrong or immature with that kind of living situation IF her mother is genuinely happy to have them there. Kind of doubting that's the case. My issue was mainly the attitude of quoted poster, as many couples can be irresponsible with money but mature in their interpersonal relationships. I don't think responsibility with money should somehow be a prerequisite for someone to marry the person they love. (Though learning that responsibility certainly wouldn't hurt the marriage.)

JustJennie1

The animals are going nowhere. We live with mom-and she would likely skin my hide for getting rid of them too. to me, its like suggesting giving up my choldren due to finance issues.

While I definitely understand this -- mainly because we acquired our current dog because someone abandoned him at the end of our road -- when you do decide to move out where are you going to live? Like a lot of people have pointed out IF you can get an apartment that allows animals they usually have a limit as to how many you can have. Even condos have limits on the amount/size/type of pet you can have. And if you can find an apartment that allows animals your rent will likely be higher because of that.

You really do need to think about what you're going to do with them. Saying you have none and then sneaking them into where you live is (not saying you are) is not the best thing to do and could cause you to get evicted.

MagicalLeopleurodon

buy your mommy some flowers!! if my mom comes home and i have flowers for her shes in a good mood no matter what (pink roses!)

thank you for the idea, my mom loves those neon daisies! I have to buy stamps later-ill grab some!

JustJennie1

I don't think responsibility with money should somehow be a prerequisite for someone to marry the person they love. (Though learning that responsibility certainly wouldn't hurt the marriage.)

You really need to be on the same page when it comes to money and how the finances are handled when you're in a relationship, especially one that's going to lead to marriage considering most arguments and divorce circles around that particular issue.

MagicalLeopleurodon

The animals are going nowhere. We live with mom-and she would likely skin my hide for getting rid of them too. to me, its like suggesting giving up my choldren due to finance issues.

While I definitely understand this -- mainly because we acquired our current dog because someone abandoned him at the end of our road -- when you do decide to move out where are you going to live? Like a lot of people have pointed out IF you can get an apartment that allows animals they usually have a limit as to how many you can have. Even condos have limits on the amount/size/type of pet you can have. And if you can find an apartment that allows animals your rent will likely be higher because of that.

You really do need to think about what you're going to do with them. Saying you have none and then sneaking them into where you live is (not saying you are) is not the best thing to do and could cause you to get evicted.

we're looking for houses/trailers-we dont like paying rent on something we'll never own

corn63

The animals are going nowhere. We live with mom-and she would likely skin my hide for getting rid of them too. to me, its like suggesting giving up my choldren due to finance issues.

While I definitely understand this -- mainly because we acquired our current dog because someone abandoned him at the end of our road -- when you do decide to move out where are you going to live? Like a lot of people have pointed out IF you can get an apartment that allows animals they usually have a limit as to how many you can have. Even condos have limits on the amount/size/type of pet you can have. And if you can find an apartment that allows animals your rent will likely be higher because of that.

You really do need to think about what you're going to do with them. Saying you have none and then sneaking them into where you live is (not saying you are) is not the best thing to do and could cause you to get evicted.

we're looking for houses/trailers-we dont like paying rent on something we'll never own

But spending 30k on a truck that he probably didn't need is a better idea. Hmm. Okay then. To each their own.

Lisa1971

TBH, if one of my parents was that overwhelmed, and my question when they walked in was, "what are you making me for dinner?", well, I'd expect some flack in return, to say the least

YEP!

Umeboshi

Let me say-the truck is due to him having used, $2000-3000 vehicles that were always breaking down. we saved for months and traded a broken down car to make payments. he travels a lot-we needed a wareanty and something 100% reliable.

The animals are going nowhere. We live with mom-and she would likely skin my hide for getting rid of them too. to me, its like suggesting giving up my choldren due to finance issues.

we are saving, building credit, and actively looking for oir own place. the pets dont cost $40/month alltogether. like i said, we pay utilities, groceries, etc.

i cook, clean, and care. i make sure everyone is fed a homemade meal and has clean work clothes. i keep the pets bathed, walked, traoned, snd keep litterboxes clean. i dont hesitate to offer my money to pay for someones gas who is struggling, and my mom and fiance are the same way.

we are looking at remodeling because we live here-we want to make it ours too. right now the house still has hurricane damage-id rather stay longer and leave my mom with a nice house than get out and leave it in the condition its in-even if that means we stay longer.

i wasnt wanting advice but di really appreciate every bit of it. im just stretched thin (we all are) and starting to panic over the day-to-days.
its just one of those days where nothing is working and i cant figure out how to fix it begore it stresses my mom or fiance out.

I'm genuinely sorry you and those you love are dealing with so much stress right now. Sometimes all you can do is try to force a smile and just get through each day as it happens. I don't have any advice to "fix" your problems. Just wanted to say that no matter how hard or stressful life can be, there will always be things left to smile about.