depression

CheriLMT · March 2013

I have a history of depression and some other bad stuff...but I have had really pretty solid 6 months mentally, but I just feel it...the past few that tidal wave of emotions, not getting out of bed, being scared to leave the house, anger, everything its coming back....I can't go through this again. The hospital stays...the I can't even what I am thinking but the bad thoughts...I have no one to talk to because has pretty much given up on me...they need me to stay better...I can't get bad again...

lightdiva1 · March 2013

I struggled with depression for years, and my advice is to relax. Get moving, and give yourself a lecture about how amazing you are. I keep a journal about all the small little things I do in the day that are good.

For example, Today I have written down that I got out of bed before 8am. I made breakfast for my kids. I hugged my kids and kissed them. (This written down like 400 times) I took a shower, I brushed my hair, I have a bra on, I ate breakfast, lunch and a snack, and have had 8 cups of water already. I stood in front of the mirror and smiled. I thought about exercising, (I didn't actually do this, but thinking about it is progress!) I laughed, a lot today. I told myself I was pretty, I made lunch for my kids, and several snacks, I told myself I was amazing for losing 27 pounds, even though I didn't lose any this today. I tell myself often how blessed I am. I have written down that my kids have said I love you mom, that my husband has texted while at work to tell me he loves me, and that tonight I will go on a date with my husband and smile and laugh and enjoy myself.

Focus as much as you can on what is going right for you. Recognize the blessings in your life as much as you can. Cry when you need to. Let yourself express yourself. When I start to feel gloom and doom approach I go for a walk, have a dance party and get moving. Physical activity helps to release endorphins that actually help fight depression.

Talk to someone. I can be an ear, a far away shoulder to lean on. You are a bright shining star, don't ever forget that.

jeme3 · March 2013

Call your doctor now! Don't wait!

Also, get out of bed and go for a walk. Outside.

Walk every day. The more you walk the better you feel. I promise.

But seriously, call your doctor yesterday.

You can do it- don't let the depression win. I have been there and I understand.

Tina2Cats · March 2013

I have struggled with depression most of my adult life so I do understand and can relate to what you are saying. I am here if you want to talk. Do call your Dr and explain what is happening. I like the idea of journaling. That way, you can see all the things you have accomplished for the day. Just writing about it is an accomplishment! You are reaching out for support! Going for a walk helps to clear your mind and how about doing something nice for yourself ie, give yourself a bubblebath, buy yourself something special, etc. I also find that pets can help, too. I have always been grateful for my cats during my depressive episodes.

thr33martins · March 2013

Yes, Doctor, doctor, doctor. I don't *struggle* with depression, per se, but I do experience it, and also anxiety. I am on two medications and when I stop them I feel it creeping in. It is hard, but remember it is not real. Rationally, try to understand that your feelings are being controlled by something biochemical and do not reflect the true state of things in your life, or how others see you. Get moving - absolutely great advice - something with music and other people around. And talk to the people you love and trust.

taylorwaylor · March 2013

I really like how you put this....

merflan · March 2013

I personally don't think depression has anything to do with fear and choosing love. Depression is an illness, not a choice. Just like no one chooses to get cancer, you don't choose depression.

I'm sorry. Depression is the worst. I struggle every day. Last June, 4 years after starting meds, I tried to come off my meds. Had a set back and for the last 8 weeks I've been back on them. I've accepted this is likely my life from now on.

Journal, think about what you are greatful for. Go for a walk, Talk, make small goals for yourself. Some days my goals were get out of bed, do one load of laundry, be nice to my kids. Some days you just have to fake it.

Friend me if you wish. I get it.

CheriLMT · March 2013

we have different views on the matter...I will leave it at that

AnswerintheSky · March 2013

Seek professional help: doctor, psychiatrist, mental health center. Don't be afraid of having to go back into hospital for a "tune-up". But if you seek medical intervention early enough you may be able to avoid it. If you are starting to have bad thoughts you may want to look up the phone number for your local crisis line. Crisis line volunteers are trained to listen and to give you the resources you need. Call them especially if you are having suicidal thoughts.

I've suffered from depression and psychosis. Now I work in mental health. The depression is not your fault and it is not a matter of what you choose to think.

Treatments help. Medication helps. Again, go for professional help.

kmm7309 · March 2013

It must be in the water because I'm struggling with it too.

The doctor put me on Wellbutrin. It's been 3 months, but no change. Mostly I think the meds are taking the edge off but my situation keeps deteriorating. I wish I knew what to tell you. There aren't many resources available for people who don't have any money (like me). If you do have health insurance or access to care, I recommend you seek it out. And the meds won't make you gain weight (contrary to popular belief) if you are diligent in your self-care.

Good luck. Message me if you need me.

droneofvelvet · March 2013

Going through a hard time, too. I don't think anything can 'cure' depression anymore. You just gotta live with it. You have to accept that its part of you. The more you think something will save you from it the more you set up yourself to fail. When you accept it you can't fail anymore. Talking to a dr helps, maybe ask a friend or family member to set up the appt and take you. I can't take myself to the dr I am way too afraid to do it. I wasn't leaving the house about a year ago and my best piece of advice is to just leave the house once a day. Take a walk, go to a store, call a friend, just get some interaction with other people or else you will get too much opportunity to be all alone and get really bad again. I wish you luck.

newdaydawning79 · March 2013

Professional help, most definitely, is needed. I struggled for years before having a semester in college where I was like you - couldn't get out of bed, was upset all the time - I actually failed two classes that semester because of it. I had a breakdown and went to the counseling office, who gave me some questions then sent me immediately to the health services office for a prescription, to take with my counseling. I have been on and off those pills ever since and i will never go off them again if I can help it. It has helped me immensely and I have no shame in admitting it.

Please go get help. Journaling and exercising and taking care of yourself are definitely great tools, and they DO help. But for some it won't completely "cure" the depression (I don't believe there IS a cure, really).

You can get through this, hon.

GaloisGirl · March 2013

This book hepled me (and not just me) immensely:

D. Burns, "Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy"
http://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-Mood-Therapy-ebook/dp/B009UW5X4C/ref=tmm_kin_title_0

Plus, it's cheap, so there's no excuse not to get it.

I already nagged you about exercise in another thread.

Seriuosly, check out the book.

GaloisGirl · March 2013

This is DANGEROUS:

I'm talking level pro-ana dangerous. Suicide promoting dangerous. (As such, I've reported it.)

Depression is an ILLNESS that KILLS. It's not about not chosing love, it's about problems in the chemistry of the brain that make it impossible for you to "choose love".

Now if you tell people suffering from this illness that they are just not chosing love, instead of sending them to the doctors to get the help they need, some of them will "choose" death in the end. Sleep well knowing that.

To some extent, it depends on our attitude and choices, but this actually applies to most diseases (the kids get better faster if clowns visit them at the hospital). The cancer comparaison made above is no exaggeration. What you wrote isn't much different than telling cancer patients to "choose love".

As for weight not being the issue: it can be the issue in a non-depressed person, so a depressed one can have the same problems + the depression on top of that. Logical.

boboff · March 2013

http://thebloggess.com/

Try this blogger, she is funny and struggles with Mental Health.

As for opinions on it, we all have different ones, based on our own perceptions, for some it might be as easy as "choosing love" for others Meds are the only way.

No one on a Forum can tell you what is going to work for you, it up to you to find that out, they can only tell you what works for them.

You must know what has helped in the past, do it again.

In the mean time, just give your self the time you need to get to where you want to be, but just try and cut out the guilt.

See that's me, I get guilt, guilt breeds low self esteem, that brings on negative thoughts and depression, FOR ME.......

Hope you are okay, Keep you head down, get your chin up, stop feeling bad about you, start a new day.

droneofvelvet · March 2013

I think if curing depression was as easy as choosing 'love' then you went to the wrong dr and were misdiagnosed with depression when really you were just in a slump. I think most depressed people still feel emotions like love just as much as people without depression. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I think that I love myself and I have accomplished a lot and even feel a little vain, but the depression still comes back. So really how can it be about loving yourself or loving others? Just my two cents.

quirkytizzy · March 2013

You're full of it - and dangerously so. To tell someone who struggles with clinical depression (which is, btw, a completely neurological condition) that they can "think positively" their way out of it only sets them up to delay treatment. Not everything in life can be overcome with a go-getter attitude. You'd do better to peddle that kind of thinking in a place where someone won't stumble over it, go "hey, I can just will it away!" and put off potentially life-saving treatment.

sunsnstatheart · March 2013

Get outside, run and exercise. You can truly choose to feel better.

CheriLMT · March 2013

I want to say thank you to everyone for your words...I do take medication everyday for a long time now, I see a psychiatrist on a regular basis, and I keep my meds locked up because I have a long history of overdosing. I know that I need to get into therapy but i just keep putting it off..I also have had ECT (shock) treatments because no medicine would work...I lost my husband over this and I just refuse now t lose my life over it

sofielein · March 2013

I don't have "lifestyle" advice because I think actual clinical depression does need a therapist (not medication, but a real therapist), but this may cheer you up a bit:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiCrniLQGYc
There is a way out...

BurtHuttz · March 2013

.

jmzz1 · March 2013

Bump

prattiger65 · March 2013

About 10 years ago I suffered from depression that was caused by a very messy divorce. I had no will to do much of anything. I lost my job and many of my SO called friends. One day I asked someone for help, they made me an appointment with an MD. I was diagnosed clinical depression and placed on Prozac, it helped. I then started seeing a psychologist, after a few months I had a breakthrough and I have been ok every since. I took the meds for 9 months. I would not have gotten well without treatment, it is a must! But it isn't a life sentence either. Prayers for you. Please get help.

Lleldiranne · March 2013

^^^ This.

I also found that, when my depression starts creeping up, if I do things for other people, it helps. But if you're to a point where you struggle to get out of bed, then definitely call your doctor immediately. Since it's the weekend, there should be a crisis hotline.

Contrarian · March 2013

Please see your doctor, and please disregard the people who are telling you depression is a choice. You will get through this and come out on the other side feeling better, but be patient and be kind to yourself.

sunsnstatheart · March 2013

I think it depends on the individual. I've been down this road to a very serious degree and had family members die. All I can say is for me, nothing worked long term other than running, exercise and generally taking care of myself. I'm sure medication and counseling does work for some. The OP will need to find her own path and has some significant decisions to make.

Contrarian · March 2013

I agree that exercise helps. I just think that telling someone with clinical depression that they are choosing to have a chemical imbalance is unkind and wrong. To someone in that head space, it could be interpreted as being told it is their own fault they feel that way, when it really isn't.

quirkytizzy · March 2013

This. The implication is that someone who isn't able to get out there and do the exercise is just being lazy and willfully staying in their depression. And considering the OP is experiencing it to the point where she cannot get out of bed, has been previously hospitalized, and is experiencing paranoia about what those around her think, this is NOT a matter of simply choosing to be all of that.

If these were conditions that had a medical name, you would be urging her to go to the hospital. The exact same should apply here. Simply because the condition involves emotion does not mean it doesn't warrant serious and medical treatment. If nothing else, having the safety net of professionals behind her would be good.

tiffanyheth · March 2013

I agree completely, Cheri. Consider that is the first post of the above person, take it with a grain of salt.

thintor · March 2013

"trying to use willpower to overcome the apathetic sort of sadness that accompanies depression is like a person with no arms trying to punch themselves until their hands grow back. A fundamental component of the plan is missing and it isn't going to work"
http://www.hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.ca/2011/10/adventures-in-depression.html
i too have struggled with depression for almost my entire life, feel free to add me if you ever want to talk

sunsnstatheart · March 2013

Depression is certainly not an individual's "fault." I would never say that and if that was read into my statement, I'm sorry. My point is that the individual has a choice of how he/she chooses to deal with it and live his/her life. I found that waiting for someone to "fix" me was incredibly ineffective and ultimately self defeating. After years of dealing with it, something finally went off in my head and I chose to change me. Running is what I use when I feel it coming on and it works incredibly well. I do not know why it works (I could speculate that it is the "runner's high" but all I know is that it does work), but I also watched a schizophrenic older brother use long distance running to a similar effect. It unfortunately was not enough to save him. It has been enough to help me.

My ultimate point here is that she needs to find a way to help herself and not be at the mercy of some random psychologist who can simply talk or a psychiatrist who is going to prescribe pills. At least shop around for one knowing that they are not all the same, and nor are they all that good. It's a profession like any other, some good, some bad.

depression

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