Wow just wow.

quirkytizzy

Since I was the first person to make a joke...err...I mean, viciously bully you in that thread - I'd like to think this entire thread is about me. I'm so honoured. THANK YOU EVERYONE! :flowerforyou:

You're just awesome anyways.

linxus

I work in retail so I deal with rude, entitled people everyday. Its honestly to the point where I am surprised when someone bothers to say "thank you". I guess its given me a bitter perspective.

I worked in housekeeping for a decade. If you think people treat cashiers rudely, you should see how they treat people who clean their toilets. That said, customer service is a hellish job any way you look at it. But you taking it out on us because you're feeling hypersensitive is no better than them taking it out on you.

I'm not implying that I'm taking it out on you guys. I'm saying it may have a lot to do with how I see people (as a whole) lately- but if anything I try to be as nice to people as possible any chance I get. And yes, I can imagine housekeeping brings in a lot of bad apples. But good on you for working through it and keeping your work ethic. I encourage anyone with any job to do their job to the best of their ability, regardless. That is how you move up. Still keeping that mindset as I don't want to work in retail forever, just until college is over.

Stormchasegrl

Since I was the first person to make a joke...err...I mean, viciously bully you in that thread - I'd like to think this entire thread is about me. I'm so honoured. THANK YOU EVERYONE! :flowerforyou:

LOL! Well played.

quirkytizzy

I'm not implying that I'm taking it out on you guys. I'm saying it may have a lot to do with how I see people (as a whole) lately- but if anything I try to be as nice to people as possible any chance I get. And yes, I can imagine housekeeping brings in a lot of bad apples. But good on you for working through it and keeping your work ethic. I encourage anyone with any job to do their job to the best of their ability, regardless. That is how you move up. Still keeping that mindset as I don't want to work in retail forever, just until college is over.

Touche. I thought I was quoting the OP, so sorry if that came out as another barbed point at you specifically, Linux. Sorry. It'd be nice if MFP would allow the person's name next to the quote. Would solve a lot of confusion.

AJ_Pete

I like you... honest to god, in my heart of hearts.

Thank you! I think? My sarcasm meter is broken today. :embarassed: I'm also watching Fawlty Towers, in which one of the characters said "heart of hearts." Curses, television!

Fer serious. I can be one sarcastic bitty, but I would never kid when it comes to matters of the heart.

porvenir

There are no rude people on this site... its the way people perceive them. I have been here since 2010 (different account) and I have never seen anything extremely rude on here. Sometimes you just need to pull up the big girl panties and deal with it. Its the internet and just like in real life "rude" people are everywhere.

Telling people to put on big girl panties is actually taught in etiquette classes as a sure sign of politeness. :flowerforyou:

This made me laugh out loud!

michcor

Weight loss and good fitness are hard to achieve. Many people on here post about fad diets, unhealthy calorie goals, looking for quick fixes etc because what we are trying to achieve takes a lot a work and time. People who have made the journey will post things to the OP telling them when something is incorrect, unsafe, or non-sustainable but they don't want to hear it and say that they feel attacked. It's then that I'd usually go for the tough love. That's where you get the "mean people" coming out. People who want to help, but the others don't want to hear it. It's frustrating so I usually walk out at that point. Then it becomes a woe is me thread with no purpose that sometimes turns into a back and forth attacking of petty people. But I assure you, anyone worth listening to has backed out by that point.

With that said, this is the internet and these people are strangers..who cares if their mean?

I agree with the last part. It's the internet. Who cares? Don't get butt-hurt over comments made by people who don't even know you. They're the ones who look like jerks. But when you make a post like this, then you look like a whiner. I don't mean any of this in a rude way, just being straight-forward.

Otterluv

People want support for eating disordered level calorie goals, diet aids that are best useless and at worst medically dangerous, exercise programs that they aren't properly fueling themselves for and will only damage themselves with, etc etc etc. I've never tried to sustain myself on 500 calories a day for months at a time.

Doesn't mean I don't know it's a bad idea.

I don't feel bad at all about not supporting those people. If you're in this for health, you shouldn't either.

QFT

Also, humor is a good thing - even in recipes about fake "ice cream", - but not real ice cream, that, my friend, is serious business.

Sabine_Stroehm

You're not wrong.
I've been on a lot of boards, and moderated a few, and find this one quite rude at times.

Some folks are just generally rude. They probably aren't very happy folks, struggling with some issues in life. I ignore them, and what they say, and how they say it.

Some folks are sure that THEY are right (this time) and therefore YOU must be wrong in your approach to weight loss if it differs from their own. Seems lots of folks are good at losing. Time will tell if they are good at maintaining. But they are SURE they are right and everyone else is wrong. So right, in fact, that they make up parody threads to mock any and every other approach to weight loss. Sometimes they mock unreasonable approaches. Sometimes they mock reasonable approaches. I think they forget that everyone is on a learning curve. They have short memories and don't remember that last time they were sure they were right too. And quite possibly, last time they were doing the very thing they are now mocking.

Some folks are young, or on their first attempt at losing weight. Some of them also are SURE they are right, and you, therefore are wrong. Time will tell if their approach works for the long haul.

Others are aggressive in response to unhealthy weight loss attempts. They may be well meaning, but I'm not sure their approach works as intended.

And others are just snarky, caustic, sarcastic etc. It's their way on the boards. They like their gifs.

And then there are a whole lot of darned nice people! Particularly in the groups. I tend to take anything on the main boards with a grain of salt (though I may call someone out on their rudeness). I do look to my peers in the groups I've chosen to join for support, and the friends on my wall.

Stick to the groups and your wall.

LiftAllThePizzas

People seem to have a strange definition of bullying. As far as I'm concerned, it is where one person (or group) has power over another person (typically in the form of violence or the threat of violence) and uses that to mess with the victim. It can happen over the internet, in cases where the parties involved actually meet in real life, such as classmates at a school.

As far as I am concerned, it cannot take place between anonymous people because there is nothing behind any of the words. There is no power differential. The "bully" has no way of forcing the other person to stay or to take it or control of their behavior to make them feel bad or whatever.

Someone could easily program a chat or forum bot to make these same types of comments, and someone probably already has. So if rude comments on a forum from random anonymous strangers can qualify as bullying, then it is possible for a simple computer program to bully a human being.

That also opens questions about the assumptions made of the personalities and motives of bullies. I mean, a simple computer program does not have self-esteem, feel bad about itself, know what a person is thinking or feeling, or get any kind of pleasure out of the suffering of a person.

DoingitWell

I work in retail so I deal with rude, entitled people everyday. Its honestly to the point where I am surprised when someone bothers to say "thank you". I guess its given me a bitter perspective.

I worked in housekeeping for a decade. If you think people treat cashiers rudely, you should see how they treat people who clean their toilets. That said, customer service is a hellish job any way you look at it. But you taking it out on us because you're feeling hypersensitive is no better than them taking it out on you.

We all have bad days. I've lost my **** on the internet tons of times. But you come back, you re-read, and you apologize to the people you flipped out on and then just try to have a better day. Creating a whole new thread to complain about it, in the public forum, is just going to invite more nastiness.

Atleast you had the decency to apologize.

andeey

I don't understand the purpose of a post like this.

Fact.

What are you trying to accomplish?

Very direct question.

If you think people are rude on a particular thread, you can call them out on it there, report to the mods, ignore them, or counteract their rudeness with your kindness.

Helpful suggestions.

All you're doing now (IMHO) is complaining and that's just adding noise to the site.

Opinion.

Then why did you even reply?

Because I thought perhaps you might answer my question, take my advice, or clarify why people post this type of thread. Seems pretty logical. I didn't agree with your post, nor did I attack you, or say anything in a rude manner. I stated a fact, asked a question and shared my opinions. That seems to me to be a valid reason to reply and generally how I carry on conversations in life. Or, (note, another question coming here) did you assume that you would get a lot of "yea, you're right!" validations only? In that case, ignore everyone who didn't do that and carry on.

spaingirl2011

I was gone for almost a year and forgot about the troll threads. I fell for one. Smacked my head, "Doh! They got me!" :grumble:

I read threads for entertainment mostly. Every now and then, there's something genuine or useful. Success threads are great.

Did that today and learned my lesson. Back to lurking....

Also I really the success threads! Positive and motivating!

_Witsy_

I'm very happy that I'm not this overly sensitive... I take what works for me, and ignore what doesn't. Internet forums are like this...all of them. So what? Don't let it effect you.

rainbowbow

Im sorry, why is this in the General Diet and Weight Loss Help part of the forums?

Lt_Starbuck

It is not just here, it is everywhere. I recently read an opinion piece on CNN on the subject. http://www.cnn.com/2013/03/01/opinion/obeidallah-outrage/index.html?hpt=hp_bn7

Yes, but that instant outrage on MFP normally goes like this:

Person posits a question about an unhealthy form of weight loss. Sometimes they say they have their mind made up already, sometimes they don't. In any case, it's out there in the public forum.

Community responds. More experienced members with significant and long term weight loss tell them not to do it. Often they suggest other reasonable, healthier things.

OP gets upset and starts demanding people be supportive.

Insanity ensues, older members with practical advice wander off, hands in the air.

OP storms off, claiming they will do what they like. Silence from them afterwards.

(and to quote someone else who once outlaid this process) "OP returns the next year, saying "I'm back, I really mean it this time!"

quoted for truth

Lt_Starbuck

Im sorry, why is this in the General Diet and Weight Loss Help part of the forums?

wait - yeah.

Im out.

Hearts_2015

You're not wrong.
I've been on a lot of boards, and moderated a few, and find this one quite rude at times.

Some folks are just generally rude. They probably aren't very happy folks, struggling with some issues in life. I ignore them, and what they say, and how they say it.

Some folks are sure that THEY are right (this time) and therefore YOU must be wrong in your approach to weight loss if it differs from their own. Seems lots of folks are good at losing. Time will tell if they are good at maintaining. But they are SURE they are right and everyone else is wrong. So right, in fact, that they make up parody threads to mock any and every other approach to weight loss. Sometimes they mock unreasonable approaches. Sometimes they mock reasonable approaches. I think they forget that everyone is on a learning curve. They have short memories and don't remember that last time they were sure they were right too. And quite possibly, last time they were doing the very thing they are now mocking.

Some folks are young, or on their first attempt at losing weight. Some of them also are SURE they are right, and you, therefore are wrong. Time will tell if their approach works for the long haul.

Others are aggressive in response to unhealthy weight loss attempts. They may be well meaning, but I'm not sure their approach works as intended.

And others are just snarky, caustic, sarcastic etc. It's their way on the boards. They like their gifs.

And then there are a whole lot of darned nice people! Particularly in the groups. I tend to take anything on the main boards with a grain of salt (though I may call someone out on their rudeness). I do look to my peers in the groups I've chosen to join for support, and the friends on my wall.

Stick to the groups and your wall.

Sadly this is true,:ohwell: though there's some great groups out there to join and good friends to be had for support just pick and choose ones right for what your goals are and you'll be fine!.

MrsTheunissen

People want support for eating disordered level calorie goals, diet aids that are best useless and at worst medically dangerous, exercise programs that they aren't properly fueling themselves for and will only damage themselves with, etc etc etc. I've never tried to sustain myself on 500 calories a day for months at a time.

Doesn't mean I don't know it's a bad idea.

I don't feel bad at all about not supporting those people. If you're in this for health, you shouldn't either.

Well said :drinker: