How to dump a guy without being mean?

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Replies

  • SeaRunner26
    SeaRunner26 Posts: 5,143 Member
    Join the witness protection program.
  • peachfigs
    peachfigs Posts: 831 Member
    Text message.

    Did that. FB message as well. Also set my status to "Single" annnnd unfriended him. Can it get any more clear in this day and age?

    Ugh, what an idiot. Just block and delete him, he'll get the message.
  • metaphoria
    metaphoria Posts: 1,432 Member
    Tell him you've devoted yourself to a life of abstinence and won't "give it up" before marriage. That will work on 99% of guys and he'll leave you as if you were the harbinger of death.

    Unless, of course, he shares the same values, and it spurs him to buy a ring quicker... That 1% get mighty decisive. :-P
  • AuddAlise
    AuddAlise Posts: 723 Member
    Text message.

    Did that. FB message as well. Also set my status to "Single" annnnd unfriended him. Can it get any more clear in this day and age?

    If you've done all this and he STILL doesn't get it then he's dense. Just tell him its over, then stop returning his calls. You've already told him once. If he didn't get it the first time then its his problem....not yours.
  • Icedrgn
    Icedrgn Posts: 17
    "It wouldn't be fair to both of us if I continued to be with you. Its over."

    Then take all the yelling. Avoid excuses. Stick to your message of wanting to break up. There just isn't a nice way to break up with someone that cares about you. Their feelings are going to get hurt no matter what.
  • monicalosesweight
    monicalosesweight Posts: 1,173 Member
    Just tell him you DON'T love him. Tell him, it's over - no friendship - nada. You are officially banning him from your life as you find he is incapable of friendship because he needs time to go out and find someone new. If necessary, call him and tell him to not say anything and read him a mini-speech explaining this to him. Say it's over - all of it - friendship is not possible. Be sure to tell him that you will not accept phone calls or emails and that showing up at your place will result in calling the cops and would cause him to have a record. Hang up and DO NOT ACCEPT HIS CALLS.

    After that, contact the cell phone company and ask them for the number to block his cell number so you can avoid his calls and you can also block him from your email. If necessary, call him friends if you know them and tell them he may need their support as you're cutting him off entirely. They can go and help him through it so that eliminates your feeling of guilt. It's time to move on girl! Go out with the gals - date! You need to feel your freedom and sense being able to not have someone trying to control you.

    If he shows up, call the cops and tell them you're scared because you specifically told him you never wanted to hear from him again. Heck, you can show them the speech you told him on the phone. The fact that you contacted them and called them there will be a record of his behavior. If he's abusive, you want a record to prove this. It won't look good if that starts to happen too often and can affect his work. It may make him think twice. They can warn him off and say this is now a record and they can hopefully get it into his bright skull. I suspect you're going to have to be brutally honest as he's not the type to believe it. Do not play a game - no more friendship - he can't do that - obviously.

    Monica
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
    Be frank and tell him the truth. Yes it may sound harsh in the beginning but its a lot better than stringing him along only to end up with nothing. In the end, your soon-to-be ex bf would thank you for it.

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