When someone compliments you, do you believe them?

bregalad5

It's very, very rare that I get compliments. Even then, I think they're just trying to make me feel good, and they're not genuine. I'm just hard wired to hear negative all the time since that's what I've gotten most of my life. My outlook is changing, but it's a long road.

I compliment people all the time, and I mean every single one of them.

vkc1978

The body confidence post got me thinking… do you believe it when someone compliments your appearance? BB tells me all the time I’m the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen. I don’t believe that. Don’t get me wrong: I’m pretty good looking, but I feel like I can’t possibly be the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen. There are so many better looking women out there.

When someone compliments you, do you believe them? Or do you feel like they’re just saying what you want to hear?

But seriously though, there are alot of different things factored into beauty- who you are as a person, who you are to your SO, what you look like, etc... all these things considered, you most likely ARE the most beautiful woman hes ever seen. When my SO says it i know hes looking at me as a whole, not just a snapshot.

PrincessEliNa

Here's a question, when YOU compliment someone, are YOU being sincere?

I'm one of those annoying people who's happy and sweet all of the time (Except when I'm being snarky...), and I enjoy complimenting people, hoping that it'll brighten up their day a bit-but I don't lie.

liesevanlingen

I've been getting tons of compliments recently on my weight loss, especially from co-workers and family, and I believe them, I mean I HAVE lost 40 pounds and it shows! I don't fish for the compliments either, but just today, four people asked me what I was doing to lose so much weight and said how good it looked. They didn't want anything from me, so why shouldn't I believe them?

My husband compliments me on a regular basis and I believe him, because he can't keep his hands off my newly slim (well, slimmer, anyway) body. Which is great by me, because weight loss really revs the libido!

Nightterror218

I am always caught off guard and seem to babble and say thank you.

Shelgirl001

I haven't really gotten any compliments from anyone lately. My now ex bf used to say he thought I was beautiful. Not sure if I believed it, I know he thought this, but to actually think it might be true... well... not so sure that's really true. Does this make sense?

gerard54

Not on this site, everyone is rainbows and butterflies haha. Everyone is an 8 or higher and would bang haha...

MyChocolateDiet

It depends. If it's a woman and I KNOW i'm rocking a really cute purse or my hair really does look nice that day then yeah. If it's a guy and I know these jeans really do fit well then yeah.

But if it's a day when I didn't shower and he looks way too googly eyed and says some insane ish like I'm the most beautiful thing to ever walk the planet...I start to think....uh oh:huh: ....pheromones, should have showered.:embarassed:

trophywife24

From men, yes. From *most* women, hell no.

Mavrick7a

From men, yes. From *most* women, hell no.

Based on my own weight loss and progress, I would agree wtih the statements that men give compliments without prejudice, whereas women are guarded about what they say.

My weight loss is noticeable, so at the workplace, many of the bluecollar guys will comment: "Hey, you lost a lot of weight" or you are getting "buff" Being supportive and sometimes asking how I did it.

I noticed that women won't make those type of remarks in front of other women, but will approach me directly and say "wow, you look really good!" If they are in a group, they will giggle but won't say anything. The most common statement is " your pants or shirt is getting too big"

WickedZoey

No, definitely not.

AKJessF

This is so crazy! I just dealt with this very same topic in counseling last night. I couldn't believe someone asked the exact same question. And the answer to this question is......no, not really. Definitely an issues with self-confidence. Time to start believing in my true worth--worth that comes from nothing I do or say, but simply because I have been created by a perfect Creator who loves me beyond belief. Our worth isn't really in what we do or say, by the way. You can't look good enough, be good enough, talk well enough, eat well enough, etc etc. Our worth is in God and who He says we are.

Justjamie0418

Yes. I just dont 'feel' it myself yet. Im getting better though.

SoDamnHungry

I have a hard time believing them. But that's because I'm very insecure.

Hexahedra

I'm secure with who I am, but I still think most compliments is just a matter of being polite. Nothing wrong with it, it's definitely better than insults.

lorinRe

Unfortunately, I find that most men (NOT ALL SO DON"T SHOOT ME) are hardwired to say what you want to hear. So when a man compliments me, I have to ask myself a few questions:

Does he want something from me?
Did he do something wrong?

Women can also do the same thing, surprisingly, especially if they don't like you.

Kids tend to be the most honest. Kids and drunk people. So if a kid or a drunk person compliments you, believe them.

Oh, but with drunk people, beer goggles make everyone 30 percent better looking. SO just be wary.

Love yourself and know you are beautiful. LOL

lorinRe

LOL Loved this! too funny. I work with kids so, yeah totally agree.

But I do have a hard time with compliments. it is a self esteem thing and I don't think people realise that a true weight loss plan is a life style change not a 'diet'. There is a psychological adjustment necessary as well as the pant size one.

Sometimes the compliment feels more like a slap and you are left wondering 'how fat you were before!" I try to realise they don't mean it that way. It is usually people you don't have great or comfortable relationships with anyway.

The coolest, and weirdest compliments for me have been from guys (not my husband, I totally trust his compliments). One was at my son's track meet with his friends dad in front of another friends dad, It just felt weird. However another guy complimented me at church and it was really sweet. I admire guys who will compliment because it I realise it is dangerous ground in today's 'politically correct' world.

I am working on this in stages. I wore an out fit that I knew I rocked in to a family thing. The compliments were nice (for the most part) but I was worried that because they tend to fixate on weight issues anyway, that it would become the only topic of conversation The next time I dressed down and purposely avoided the subject. I'm taking small steps.

I also have issues with photo's of myself so again, small steps. I have a photo taken and examine it, let myself decide what I like or don't and make adjustments. it is hard to not protest when people want to take a picture but I am learning.

WhitneySheree88

Sometimes yes and sometimes no just depends on my mood/outfit/hair/makeup during that moment. I usually just get really awkward and embarrassed when someone compliments me. Had a guy tell me once that my eyes and the dimple in my chin were sexy ... I didn't know how to act lol

salladeve

When I was younger and my dh would tell me how pretty or sexy he thought I was I would usually respond "I love you too". I never really believed him, I thought he loves me so of course he thinks I'm pretty. I have always had a very low opinion of myself (really just how I look, I'm very confident in other areas of my life), which I have since found out (through counseling), was a result of my abuse as a child. I have learned as I've gotten older to accept a compliment, because I think most people will not say anything about your appearance if they have something bad to say. So if they go to the trouble to say something, I have to believe they mean it, and I take it for what it's worth, and thank them.

I do have to say that I LOVE it when people think my daughter (she is 38) and I are sisters. LOVE IT :bigsmile: It has happened since she was a teenager, so I have always believed that particular complement.

salladeve

From men, yes. From *most* women, hell no.

Based on my own weight loss and progress, I would agree wtih the statements that men give compliments without prejudice, whereas women are guarded about what they say.

My weight loss is noticeable, so at the workplace, many of the bluecollar guys will comment: "Hey, you lost a lot of weight" or you are getting "buff" Being supportive and sometimes asking how I did it.

I noticed that women won't make those type of remarks in front of other women, but will approach me directly and say "wow, you look really good!" If they are in a group, they will giggle but won't say anything. The most common statement is " your pants or shirt is getting too big"

Where the heck do you work? I've given many compliments to men, and have meant all of them..... and I have never, ever "giggled".

salladeve

Unfortunately, I find that most men (NOT ALL SO DON"T SHOOT ME) are hardwired to say what you want to hear. So when a man compliments me, I have to ask myself a few questions:

Does he want something from me?
Did he do something wrong?

Women can also do the same thing, surprisingly, especially if they don't like you.

Kids tend to be the most honest. Kids and drunk people. So if a kid or a drunk person compliments you, believe them.

Oh, but with drunk people, beer goggles make everyone 30 percent better looking. SO just be wary.

Love yourself and know you are beautiful. LOL

And the elderly! I have spent many hours in nursing homes in the last 6 years, and the elderly with dementia are VERY honest!

avababy05

No.Never.

MyChocolateDiet

Usually. Unless it's about my being "nice". I've been called that so infrequently that I don't beleive it when I hear it. "Nice *kitten*, nice rack, great personality, good friend, insightful, funny, loyal, b!tchen, awesome, or facking gorgeous" I believe though. At any size. I know it takes all kinds and no matter what size I am, I am someone's cup of tea and when I run into one of those it's always an explosive comment about it. So I smile and take the compliment. It's the graceful thing to do. Plus who am I to judge their taste or personal preference? If my size 14 azz is their idea of heaven incarnate, why should I argue. If my size 4 waist several months later or prior is their idea of the "ideal woman" why should I rain on their parade. I equate it to the day when I finally set IRL eyes on nicolas cage and proclaim "YOu are my FAVORITE you are my ideal image of a man and I don't even need to talk to you but i'd love to, but anyways I love you to PIECES".....I wouldn't want him to say ..."no I"m ugly." or "what who me?" . I'd want him to smile or smirk. (and not sic his bodyguards on me)

MyChocolateDiet

I'm secure with who I am, but I still think most compliments is just a matter of being polite. Nothing wrong with it, it's definitely better than insults.

Well okay I'm not being polite right now, and have no reason to be nor social pressure...but you have kind eyes. Now you HAVE to accept that compliment because you didn't fish for it, we are not in a bangpass or rate thread and we are not in person and you neither owe me anything or have anything I want. So there. Completely sincere unreturnable compliment. Take it. Take it all!

runner2runner

Nah, not really!! Still brightens up my day though!!

brower47

I don't care, it's a compliment.