30th time I have caught my husband stealing my pain meds!

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Replies

  • Biggipooh
    Biggipooh Posts: 350
    I think most importantly, why are you asking strangers in an online weight loss forum what you should do with your husband/marriage? Seriously?!

    LOL, just thought the exact same.
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
    There is no Chit-Chat, Fun, & Games here :(.

    When did it become ok for people to not handle their business and just be like "let me log online and ask the entire Internet what to do?"

    There is offensive because you're an idiot. You're just as bad as your husband. He needs help and you need to learn to lock your pills up.

    common-sense-e1302495226830.jpg

    Damn looking for this image let others post before me NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
  • Jessica_D_Shadow
    Jessica_D_Shadow Posts: 138 Member
    30th Time. Ouch. Have you asked him about it? Are you sure it's him? How old are your kids? (Pain Meds are common drug to trade in schools now adays. If you kids are under Junior High then I'd say no worry with the kids. But 6th Grade up I'd look into them as well.). What is his excuse for them being gone?

    You should have probably hid them the first time there were pills missing. But, that being said. If he's your husband, he's your husband for a reason. You love him. It's up to you, but if it were me I would give my man a chance. I would firstly prove that it was him (No one else in the house, kids are under the age of 12.) Then, I would research drug rehab programs. I would confront him and tell him he needs help and show him my research, give him options. These options would also include an ultimatum, Fix his problem or GTFO. But, I would give my man that chance instead of straight kick to the curb. But, only one. Because if he would keep sliding back into it after going to rehab and what not, then he clearly wouldn't love me or the kids enough to want to quit. =) That is what I would do.

    Good Luck. I hope everything works out in your favor.
  • jgollnick
    jgollnick Posts: 73 Member
    For all the people that said "kick him to the curb" or "just because you married him doesn't mean you have to be the one to save him", you made my heart hurt. This is not her boyfriend it's the person she chose to spend the rest of her life with. I got the notion that the people that said that have never dealt with addiction and probably aren't married. If you are married it shocks me that you would end a life long relationship over the something that probably can be fixed.
  • IamBlackMamba
    IamBlackMamba Posts: 229
    i just reallllllly hope you aren't a troll. Really.
  • LishieFruit89
    LishieFruit89 Posts: 1,956 Member
    Like others have said, he does need help.

    But why did it take 30 times for you to be this frustrated and such?
    After you realized it the first time, you should have done something about it then.
    Not let it keep happening.
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
    Shouldn't you have caught on after the first, oh, 29 times at least?
  • hbrittingham
    hbrittingham Posts: 2,518 Member
    And she's deactivated.
  • Ramberta
    Ramberta Posts: 1,312 Member
    Assuming you aren't trolling...

    Your husband has an addiction issue, not a lying/stealing issue. Stop being a whining brat and try to get him some help ffs.


    This is why I lose faith in humanity. People can't seem to deal with real life issues.

    Dealing with "real life issues" in the moment is hard for everyone. Lying and stealing is just as much of an issue as the addiction, they are symptoms that put strain on the marriage and make it impossible to maintain trust-- a key component of any successful relationship.

    Not really sure how her feelings of upset and helplessness in a time of personal trial makes you "lose faith in humanity".

    She's finally realized that there is a huge problem in her relationship, and awareness is the first step to solving any problem. Whatever choices she makes are hers, and "right" and "wrong" are too subjective of words for what happens to bad relationships, but I'd say she's on the right track here.
  • btoeps74
    btoeps74 Posts: 167 Member
    Food for thought. Perscription pills can be a gateway drug for a more serious, cheaper and easier to obtain heroin addiction.
  • User Deactivated.
    BreeNJesse has deactivated their account.

    Just an FYI
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
    Who does that?

    a drug addict
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
    And if your husband can steal them, your kids can too. You need therapy and parenting classes.
  • CristinaL1983
    CristinaL1983 Posts: 1,119 Member
    I think most importantly, why are you asking strangers in an online weight loss forum what you should do with your husband/marriage? Seriously?!

    This^^

    I had a couple ankle surgeries and have prescriptions for pain medications. After my second ankle surgery I got a bottle of 90 percosets (sp?). I didn't take them because I could deal with the pain with just advil but one day my pain level was very high and I went to take one of them and they were all gone (in less than a week). I asked my husband about it and he said that he had taken "a few." TBH, that was just the tip of the iceberg. All of my prescription pain killers would disappear, one day I found him extremely drunk when he was supposed to be taking care of our infant daughter (while I was at work), and then I had to bail him out of jail for drug charges. I offered to send him through rehab, he declined. I left.
  • greentart
    greentart Posts: 411 Member
    I think most importantly, why are you asking strangers in an online weight loss forum what you should do with your husband/marriage? Seriously?!

    Because sometimes a person needs a non-biased point of view. Responding to someone's search for help like an a*hole is not helpful.

    To the OP: Do you love your husband? You say you believe in Karma, but if so, would you really kick him to the curb because he's addicted/making mistakes? Have you talked to him about it? As most others, I would put the pills under lock & combination (not key, and not a number he would know/identify easily). Get him help. Get the two of you help.
    If this is the 30th time you've caught him, why haven't you addressed it until now?

    If you love him, help him. If he refuses to be helped, then you can make the tough decisions from there. Good luck.
  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
    150 post and deactivated before page 2

    Wow thin skin
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    BreeNJesse has deactivated their account.

    tumblr_m6ha2uyfh71rwcc6bo1_400.gif
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
    Shouldn't you have caught on after the first, oh, 29 times at least?

    No that would take her being sober to pull that off.
  • sweetNsassy2584
    sweetNsassy2584 Posts: 515 Member
    OMFG! Really?!? You both need help. Get off the damn pills!
  • Morninglory81
    Morninglory81 Posts: 1,190 Member
    Assuming you aren't trolling...

    Your husband has an addiction issue, not a lying/stealing issue. Stop being a whining brat and try to get him some help ffs.


    This is why I lose faith in humanity. People can't seem to deal with real life issues.
    This! My husband is a pill addict and he knows it. At first it was just an admission to himself and me. Than he realized it was a problem. Than he decided to get clean. It has been 3 years since he last used and it was and is a hard road but for better or worse not till I am tired of it. It took family therapy as well as drug counseling. This is a hard road but one that needs to be taken together.
  • alliemarie77
    alliemarie77 Posts: 378 Member
    Hey, maybe try putting them where only you know where they are, and try talking to your husband about it.
    If it is really an issue maybe give him an ultimatum.

    I believe in karma also. I also believe in marriage, and if we have a problem we are going to sit and talk until we work **** out. If it still can't be worked out then Atleast I know I tried.

    Good luck!
  • Ramberta
    Ramberta Posts: 1,312 Member
    Like others have said, he does need help.

    But why did it take 30 times for you to be this frustrated and such?
    After you realized it the first time, you should have done something about it then.
    Not let it keep happening.

    When you live with an addict-- especially one out of rehab and at extreme risk for relapsing-- you get to a point in the road of recovery where you can see a habit forming, or an imminent relapse, but you don't really have concrete proof. You don't want to make unfounded accusations, especially to your loved one. So you wait, and you collect patterns and proof, and then you finally come to a point where they can't deny it any longer and the truth has to come out. People will lie through anything, but eventually all addicts feel guilty enough to come clean and admit their behaviors-- but sometimes only months or years after lying through their teeth.
  • jgollnick
    jgollnick Posts: 73 Member
    Assuming you aren't trolling...

    Your husband has an addiction issue, not a lying/stealing issue. Stop being a whining brat and try to get him some help ffs.


    This is why I lose faith in humanity. People can't seem to deal with real life issues.

    best response yet.
  • asamuels85
    asamuels85 Posts: 170 Member
    Keep them locked up!

    He needs help! But remember, just because you married him does NOT mean you have to be the one to save him.

    i disagree, you MAY be tired of the lying and stealing BUT, you PROMISED to see him through his darkest days (or something to that effect) in front of God and everyone on your wedding day.. if you ask me, he REALLY needs you to make that promise a reality and soon. It wont be easy for either of you, but you must have married him for a reason, do not give up on him, help him be the man you met, fell for and had 2 babies with!

    unless things get unsafe for you and kids of course, then, run fast.

    Very sorry to hear your struggles, and i see many folks around here getting on those pills and falling completely apart. you arent alone in your frustrations, support may help you help him. its out there. but do what you feel is right, i wish you all the very best!
  • Valera0466
    Valera0466 Posts: 319 Member
    I imagine that the type of pills you have are some sort of opiate like oxy contin or oxy codone. I am very serious about this subject because I have 2 siblings and a son that are addicted to pain pills. They are highly addictive. They are a very difficult to break the habit. The addiction can completely change your personality. Your husband needs professional help. That should be your area of focus, not divorcing because of his lies and stealing. Although I do understand your anger, know that he is not in control of what he is doing. This is your life partner we are talking about. If you love him you should help him, not shun him.

    ^^^this^^^ At the same time your help can only go so far. If he isn't willing to get help you may need to consider leaving.
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    A manager lost his wife due to overdose. She struggled for years with her addiction before it finally killed her. I suggest anyone having to deal with this take it very seriously and get help.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    For all the people that said "kick him to the curb" or "just because you married him doesn't mean you have to be the one to save him", you made my heart hurt. This is not her boyfriend it's the person she chose to spend the rest of her life with. I got the notion that the people that said that have never dealt with addiction and probably aren't married. If you are married it shocks me that you would end a life long relationship over the something that probably can be fixed.

    You make it sound as if recovery from addiction is as easy as fixing a leaking toilet. Well, it ain't that easy, and "probably can be fixed" is probably being optimistic. This from a recovered alcoholic married to a recovered alcoholic.
  • craigmandu
    craigmandu Posts: 976 Member
    150 post and deactivated before page 2

    Wow thin skin

    People that have to "look" at themselves as part of a problem in life tend to have thin skins!
  • IamBlackMamba
    IamBlackMamba Posts: 229
    The troll deactivated Peeps.
  • lheaton
    lheaton Posts: 51 Member
    Divorce is not the answer. Get counseling and work through it. That's what committing your life to someone else means - good and bad, better or worse, in sickness and health...
This discussion has been closed.