Considering rehoming a husband.

OMG thank you for the laugh this afternoon!

Maybe if you get him another companion to play with he three of you would get a long better. It worth a shot before re homing him. You might have to try several different companions before you put him out, sounds like he just needs a couple of playmates, hopefully the female version

I considered the issues and have some "husband-whisperer" solutions for you since parting with him is possibly sad and/or financially difficult.

1) He never puts his things away - - SO - - put things away for him...for example, the dirty clothes on the floor are easily folded and replaced in his drawer. Eventually he will notice they are not getting washed unless they make it to the laundry basket.

2) He is very lax in doing his chores. He will leave the dishes in the sink for days - - SO - - serve him dinner on last night's dirty plate. As he scoops up lasagna and finds last night's broiled haddock in his mouth, he will eventually either do dishes or be hospitalized for food poisoning.

3) He talks while I am trying to work at home - - SO - - focus your attention on him intently. Follow him around and ask him to explain each thing he is doing. After 2 minutes and 14 seconds, he will tell you he needs to go to the bathroom, then he will slip quietly to the couch to watch tv if you pretend to look the other way. If he speaks again, repeat the focused attention on him. No husband can withstand focused attention for more than 8 minutes before he goes into shock.

4) He constantly forgets to close doors - - SO - - install cylindrical springs on all doors so that every door slams shut loudly as he walks through. Perhaps he will decide closing the door is better than hearing the slamming. He should be the one to uninstall the springs.

5) He yells at the screen while playing video games - - SO - - play along with the fantasy he is engaging in and yell, yelp, shout, grunt, whistle, or moan loudly after each of his vocalizations. He will immediately look at you and lose his game status which is troublesome to him. Eventually he will go mute so that you will too or he will turn off the game to focus on you if your moans were more interesting than the game. :blushing:

Best wishes with the ongoing training. Please don't be surprised if new behaviors surface once these are corrected. I am always available for consultation.

Did you read the return policy before Adopting him? There are some no kill shelters that might help....

A good belly rub goes a long way to getting what you want

Dammit...now you tell me...I've been rubbin' the wrong thing all this time...

I considered the issues and have some "husband-whisperer" solutions for you since parting with him is possibly sad and/or financially difficult.

1) He never puts his things away - - SO - - put things away for him...for example, the dirty clothes on the floor are easily folded and replaced in his drawer. Eventually he will notice they are not getting washed unless they make it to the laundry basket.

2) He is very lax in doing his chores. He will leave the dishes in the sink for days - - SO - - serve him dinner on last night's dirty plate. As he scoops up lasagna and finds last night's broiled haddock in his mouth, he will eventually either do dishes or be hospitalized for food poisoning.

3) He talks while I am trying to work at home - - SO - - focus your attention on him intently. Follow him around and ask him to explain each thing he is doing. After 2 minutes and 14 seconds, he will tell you he needs to go to the bathroom, then he will slip quietly to the couch to watch tv if you pretend to look the other way. If he speaks again, repeat the focused attention on him. No husband can withstand focused attention for more than 8 minutes before he goes into shock.

4) He constantly forgets to close doors - - SO - - install cylindrical springs on all doors so that every door slams shut loudly as he walks through. Perhaps he will decide closing the door is better than hearing the slamming. He should be the one to uninstall the springs.

5) He yells at the screen while playing video games - - SO - - play along with the fantasy he is engaging in and yell, yelp, shout, grunt, whistle, or moan loudly after each of his vocalizations. He will immediately look at you and lose his game status which is troublesome to him. Eventually he will go mute so that you will too or he will turn off the game to focus on you if your moans were more interesting than the game. :blushing:

Best wishes with the ongoing training. Please don't be surprised if new behaviors surface once these are corrected. I am always available for consultation.

BESTEST!!

Clearly your pet has worm and possible a few other parasite.
An ideal treatment is to do an intestinal purge, fig and pumkin seed pie and wormwood tea. He'll never see it coming but it will get him off his butt. And running.
And other than an initial restricted diet, which will likely lead your pet to eat from outside garbage cans, it is a good idea to block him from eating out, hanging out with other mutts and bringing back worms and other parasites. The solution? Take the car keys and go max out the credit card on shoes.
Voila.

Do *not* contact the breeder. They are very territorial. Although they are likely aware of the issues you discuss, they will blame you for them.

I find that small rewards work best. Rewarding good behavior as opposed to punishing the bad is the best way to go.

I find husbands like beer, pizza, and cookies.

^^ this.

Mine responds well to positive reinforcement, but we don't do food treats. He gets extra "attention" for his good behavior. :blushing:

Perhaps if you had him bred he would settle in somewhat...

glad i'm single.

although, a man that is a gamer would be perfect for me. i'd be yelling at the screen with him.