Considering rehoming a husband.

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Replies

  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
    Just love on him, he can't help it. You made a commintment. Thank God that he isn't worse than that. He will help you develop patience. The first year of marriage is the most difficult. I have been with my hubby for a total of 20 years. It gets better if you show him love and kindness (if he is a good person). How do you attract bees?

    Bacon and slutty behavior works on bees too?


    HA!
  • ZeroWoIf
    ZeroWoIf Posts: 588 Member
    Mix 10 tablespoons of metamucil in his oatmeal along with half a cup of antifreeze. Let me know how that goes.
  • Juliejustsaying
    Juliejustsaying Posts: 2,332 Member
    Well for those of us in rescues, we do recommend that you do some behavior modification training. Positive reinforcment, say, the use of a clicker is advised for when he actually does something good. IF there is anything. If not, well I have to be blunt here, there are a lot of husbands in rescues now...some a lot nicer than yours who are more deserving of a good home. Just saying...there are some that just can't be rehabilitated and must be destroyed. We usually try and do it humanly, but Helga needs to have her fun, too.

    :tongue:
  • moxiecowgirl
    moxiecowgirl Posts: 291 Member
    I think I might have one of his puppies living in my house. This is why everyone should have their pets spayed or neutered!
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,689 Member
    Just love on him, he can't help it. You made a commintment. Thank God that he isn't worse than that. He will help you develop patience. The first year of marriage is the most difficult. I have been with my hubby for a total of 20 years. It gets better if you show him love and kindness (if he is a good person). How do you attract bees?

    Bacon and slutty behavior works on bees too?

    Only the cats get meat in our house, but he seems immune to slutty behavior, cookies, and beer.
  • jamiem1102
    jamiem1102 Posts: 1,196 Member
    Sounds too well behaved to have been a rescue.... did you contact the breeder? I dare ya....

    Bahahahahaha!!!!!!!! Hilarious. :drinker:
  • ritalef
    ritalef Posts: 93 Member
    bumping to finish later...laughing too hard!
  • rompers16
    rompers16 Posts: 5,404 Member
    A good belly rub goes a long way to getting what you want :)
  • ChristineDiet
    ChristineDiet Posts: 719 Member
    Does he at least put the lid down?

    Geez is that why he's a keeper - must keep mine then - cos that's they only bloody thing I've managed to train him to do! x
  • nikinyx6
    nikinyx6 Posts: 772 Member
    Contact Ceasar Milan, he can show up and retrain him by making tsh...tsh.... sounds when he does something wrong. Also uses a tennis racket and a glare to keep him out of things.

    bahah! I'm gonna try tsh...TSH!... if all else fails, there's the tennis raquet!
  • Squidgeypaws007
    Squidgeypaws007 Posts: 1,012 Member
    :laugh:
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    ok guys been takin notes i had a been problem outside my house and so I mixed up to metamucil and antifreeze and threw it on the bee, well it didn't work so well the bee turnt super and now wtf do i do i can't leave my house????

    Help???
  • BeckiCharlotte13x
    BeckiCharlotte13x Posts: 259 Member
    Do *not* contact the breeder. They are very territorial. Although they are likely aware of the issues you discuss, they will blame you for them.

    I find that small rewards work best. Rewarding good behavior as opposed to punishing the bad is the best way to go.

    I find husbands like beer, pizza, and cookies.

    You forgot sex, I'm just saying:laugh:

    Jinx, thats what I said.
  • tmauck4472
    tmauck4472 Posts: 1,785 Member
    Is this about a husband or an animal? Is this even real? I'm beyond confused and just wasted a good ten minutes of my life I will never get back.

    WOW...lmao
  • beekuzz
    beekuzz Posts: 428 Member
    I rehomed mine twice, but he kept coming back. So, I had to move. Problem solved. LMAO :drinker:
  • 6heatherb6
    6heatherb6 Posts: 469 Member
    Do *not* contact the breeder. They are very territorial. Although they are likely aware of the issues you discuss, they will blame you for them.

    I find that small rewards work best. Rewarding good behavior as opposed to punishing the bad is the best way to go.

    I find husbands like beer, pizza, and cookies.
    Agree....kill him with kindness!!!
    :heart: :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • tmauck4472
    tmauck4472 Posts: 1,785 Member
    Do *not* contact the breeder. They are very territorial. Although they are likely aware of the issues you discuss, they will blame you for them.

    I find that small rewards work best. Rewarding good behavior as opposed to punishing the bad is the best way to go.

    I find husbands like beer, pizza, and cookies.

    You forgot sex, I'm just saying:laugh:

    Jinx, thats what I said.

    well fudge cycles :)
  • lizzybethclaire
    lizzybethclaire Posts: 849 Member
    My husband would probably rehome me if he could :tongue:
  • Laoch_Cailin
    Laoch_Cailin Posts: 414 Member
    Obviously you haven't developed 'the glare' yet. Works on mine very well!
  • markymarrkk
    markymarrkk Posts: 495 Member
    you're not training him correctly, they respond rather effectively with reward and with holding rewards. a simple verbal warning indicating the intention to withhold Pooh tang should do it. Then, if behavior persists, he is testing your resolve, proceed with Poohtang restriction.

    Good Luck ! :)
  • taiyola
    taiyola Posts: 964 Member
    Has he started licking himself?

    :laugh:
  • loricolwill
    loricolwill Posts: 189 Member
    OMG thank you for the laugh this afternoon!
  • TerrieBNLWECHANGED
    TerrieBNLWECHANGED Posts: 27
    You know you made a lifetime commitment to this husband, right? It's going to be difficult to rehome him with these behavior problems. How would you feel if the next person to take him had to put him down?

    I say work with him. You could get one that poops on the bed.

    LOVE you!!! LOLOLLOLOL
  • bigd65
    bigd65 Posts: 171 Member
    Maybe if you get him another companion to play with he three of you would get a long better. It worth a shot before re homing him. You might have to try several different companions before you put him out, sounds like he just needs a couple of playmates, hopefully the female version
  • k7n2w3
    k7n2w3 Posts: 241 Member
    Rehoming ads can sometimes state "rehoming fee"... depending on the desperation for rehoming you might want to waive the fee.. i can't imagine a rehoming fee does anything to help find him a better home anyway...

    (this is such a great thread hehe)
  • LosingWeight4Good
    LosingWeight4Good Posts: 156 Member
    I considered the issues and have some "husband-whisperer" solutions for you since parting with him is possibly sad and/or financially difficult.

    1) He never puts his things away - - SO - - put things away for him...for example, the dirty clothes on the floor are easily folded and replaced in his drawer. Eventually he will notice they are not getting washed unless they make it to the laundry basket.

    2) He is very lax in doing his chores. He will leave the dishes in the sink for days - - SO - - serve him dinner on last night's dirty plate. As he scoops up lasagna and finds last night's broiled haddock in his mouth, he will eventually either do dishes or be hospitalized for food poisoning.

    3) He talks while I am trying to work at home - - SO - - focus your attention on him intently. Follow him around and ask him to explain each thing he is doing. After 2 minutes and 14 seconds, he will tell you he needs to go to the bathroom, then he will slip quietly to the couch to watch tv if you pretend to look the other way. If he speaks again, repeat the focused attention on him. No husband can withstand focused attention for more than 8 minutes before he goes into shock.

    4) He constantly forgets to close doors - - SO - - install cylindrical springs on all doors so that every door slams shut loudly as he walks through. Perhaps he will decide closing the door is better than hearing the slamming. He should be the one to uninstall the springs.

    5) He yells at the screen while playing video games - - SO - - play along with the fantasy he is engaging in and yell, yelp, shout, grunt, whistle, or moan loudly after each of his vocalizations. He will immediately look at you and lose his game status which is troublesome to him. Eventually he will go mute so that you will too or he will turn off the game to focus on you if your moans were more interesting than the game. :blushing:

    Best wishes with the ongoing training. Please don't be surprised if new behaviors surface once these are corrected. I am always available for consultation.
  • angiejo666
    angiejo666 Posts: 11
    I too have a rescue and I found that the breeder didn't cause as many of the behavioral problems as the previous owner did. Very hard to re-train, but kindness and treats do go a long way in helping to reinforce good behaviors. I figure in 20 or 30 more years he'll be well trained!
    :laugh:
  • jaxxie
    jaxxie Posts: 576 Member
    Did you read the return policy before Adopting him? There are some no kill shelters that might help....
  • Annette_rose
    Annette_rose Posts: 427 Member
    Oh my gosh..this thread is toooo funny!!! I needed a good laugh. :laugh:
  • marnijojo
    marnijojo Posts: 235 Member
    A good belly rub goes a long way to getting what you want :)

    Dammit...now you tell me...I've been rubbin' the wrong thing all this time...
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