So apparently I'm a failure????

Options
24

Replies

  • RevNimue
    RevNimue Posts: 66 Member
    Options
    You are not a failure. If you feel good about what you Have accomplished that's all that matters. I would honestly suggest, getting a friend who is positive and not someone who is negative to work out with. It can be pretty discouraging when someone is constantly making you question your accomplishments. The fact that you got as far as you did AND you got a butt blister to prove it, I think that's a HUGE accomplishment! Not everyone can say that they have gotten a butt blister from doing an amazing workout like you have. Kudos to you sister and stay strong, you've come a long way and honestly the only person that you should compare yourself to is yourself. :)
  • kadinlucas
    kadinlucas Posts: 77 Member
    Options
    Well what you did still sounds impressive and is definitely a personal success. But in terms of doing that trail, then yes unfortunately you failed.
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    Options
    not a very good friend at all :(
  • taaaters
    taaaters Posts: 70
    Options
    You are definitely not a failure! You did brilliantly doing what you did! You're friend isn't very supportive and you not finishing is his issue, not yours... don't let him bring you down! Congratulations for going as far as you did! :)
  • HolyPeas
    HolyPeas Posts: 71
    Options
    I mean, you didn't finish but I'm not sure why this person felt the need to call it a failure. I think THAT choice of words says a lot about that person and what they think of you.

    Consider finding new people.
  • VogtAndrea
    VogtAndrea Posts: 236
    Options
    You are NOT a failure. Don't ever let anyone tell you that you're a failure at anything.
    You ARE a work in progress and doing very well at it. This "endurance ride" was a huge step and you did far better than you've ever done so far. That's success. If they want to feel they failed, fine..... let them. You do NOT have to feel that way EVER.
    This isn't a journey that any of us who are really heavy can make in a short time. It's done in baby steps and small victories. This wasn't a failure because you've done more and gone farther than you've ever done before. IF they have and didn't manage to finish it, let them take on their own negative comment but YOU do NOT have to.
  • Gidzmo
    Gidzmo Posts: 904 Member
    Options
    We set out this last week to do the greenbrier river trail... About 160 miles in five days... Myself and the kids and two friends...

    We didn't make it... Decided to stop ten miles from the end (saving us twenty miles round trip) and did 140... Slept out four nights... Rain one of them forcing us to seek shelter in a gazebo instead of sleeping in our hammocks (pain in the back as it were) butt blister (almost made me stop and hitchhike back to the car at mile forty...)

    I decided to cut it short mainly because I have to work tomorrow and I don't want to be dead... I'm already very sore... I'm not sure how the extra twenty miles would have done me...

    So my friend says we failed because we didn't "finish" what we set out to do... We didn't finish the trail and I have never seen the last ten miles of it... (we have section biked it before)

    I say I am not a failure because I DOUBLED my previous longest bike... I didn't once say "I can't do this it's too hard lets go home I'm finished" (although he claims my cutting it short was saying that)... I say I'm not a failure because I don't know many people who can do 140 miles let alone people my age and weight (I'm still 270#)...


    So am I a failure? Is this a guy thing I don't understand? My friend has this thing about "completing" things that feels almost neurotic to me...

    A failure? NO! You doubled your previous longest bike ride (that's a huge achievement). And no matter how much you checked (as one poster suggested you do), that could have been a surprise storm (figuring the weather is called 'forecasting' for a reason).

    Maybe you'll try again when you are feeling better!
  • heatherfeatherv
    heatherfeatherv Posts: 8 Member
    Options
    Also if he is not heavy he doesn't understand you just did the distance you did carrying the weight of a whole nother person on your back so really you did your distance for two. Good job I know because I'm 339.6 everything is harder.:wink:
  • legs_n_bacon
    legs_n_bacon Posts: 478 Member
    Options
    Your friend is a dilhole, you didn't fail.
  • wbgolden
    wbgolden Posts: 2,071 Member
    Options
    Your friend is a dilhole, you didn't fail.
    taking an "l" out doesn't mean you didn't steal it back. i hope you know that.
  • vfnmoody
    vfnmoody Posts: 271 Member
    Options
    We set out this last week to do the greenbrier river trail... About 160 miles in five days... Myself and the kids and two friends...

    .. Decided to stop ten miles from the end (saving us twenty miles round trip) and did 140...
    Slept out four nights...
    Rain one of them forcing us to seek shelter in a gazebo instead of sleeping in our hammocksutt

    I decided to cut it short
    . We didn't finish the trail and I have never seen the last ten miles of it..
    You rock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    You spent 5 days 4 nights with the kids.
    Rained during the trip but finished it anyway.
    Biked 140 miles.
    You" Decided" to cut 20 miles out of the center of the ride. Made a judgment call based on a realistic assessment of physical ability and real life circumstances. While supervising children in a wilderness setting.


    Sounds like a great weekend. Wish I could say I did anything that even comes close to this in the year.
  • teagirlmedium
    teagirlmedium Posts: 679 Member
    Options
    For this story you did fail. You were supposed to do 160, but you didn't. You did 140, which is great and really close to your goal, but its not 160, so I'm going to side with your friend on this.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
    Options
    YOU are NOT a failure.

    I would call that endeavor a failed attempt at completion though. But then I think walking during a run is failure too... for me.
  • PatriceMG
    PatriceMG Posts: 232 Member
    Options
    Who says you were 'supposed to' do the whole 160 miles? You did what you could and what an accomplishment it was! You did not fail, you succeeded marvelously! You need to find a new friend who is more supportive of your journey... IPOU!
  • gabeej
    gabeej Posts: 45
    Options
    DUMP
  • Eve23
    Eve23 Posts: 2,352 Member
    Options
    As far as I am concerned neither of you failed. You biked a great distance and improved yourself while you were at it. I am not sure I could do that bike ride.

    For him it may feel as if he failed but that just tells me they need to change their way of thinking. Are you going to fill that glass up or empty it. I choose to fill it and I hope the people closest to me will do that as well.


    Bravo for having a good trip.
  • Cold_Steel
    Cold_Steel Posts: 897 Member
    Options
    Please read what I am going to say...

    Yes, you are a failure. you set out a goal and you failed to complete that goal.

    A failure is defined as an act or instance of failing or proving unsuccessful; lack of success: "His effort ended in failure. The campaign was a failure." (Dictionary.com)

    Now, the key to understand all this is the power that you appear to give this word. There is nothing wrong with being a failure, maybe your friend is not exactly the most socially sensitive person (as I have been known not to be) but hear me out.

    Yes, you are a failure. Many people fail before they succeed in almost every thing they do. I failed to lose weight this week, I am a failure but guess what? I learned from it, I reevaluated my goals and set new ones and am working to be successful and not a failure. To fail at something is to learn from that something, you learned a lot from this experience so while you technically did fail, you learned from this experience and will contribute this failure to the next time you attempt this goal.

    I am sorry but I just dislike this pandering attitude that every one has... "Oh you are not a failure, you accomplished so much !" It is a matter of context and quite frankly you failed, but while that is true it is also very true that you did in fact learn from this failure and either A. will be successful next time or B. Reevaluate your goal and push on.

    I would rather be called a failure any day of the week rather than a quitter, a failure has an opportunity to do better next time to get on the horse, a quitter has thrown in the towel and refused to fix their errors.

    Living life without being a failure would be pretty boring, imagine how drab life would be to walk around and constantly be perfect !

    Get over the word, you failed but the important thing is you did not quit, the only permanent failure is the quitter. Failure is temporary, success is permanent.
  • bellygoaway
    bellygoaway Posts: 441 Member
    Options
    Some of the biggest successes in life look like failures on the outside. Did you finish the course? No. Did you make it farther than ever before? Yes! Are you psyched to do it again? Yes! Are you the same person you used to be? No!

    So, are you a failure? If we total it up, it is 2 yes & 2 no... I will leave the decision up to you ;)
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    Options
    We set out this last week to do the greenbrier river trail... About 160 miles in five days... Myself and the kids and two friends...

    We didn't make it... Decided to stop ten miles from the end (saving us twenty miles round trip) and did 140... Slept out four nights... Rain one of them forcing us to seek shelter in a gazebo instead of sleeping in our hammocks (pain in the back as it were) butt blister (almost made me stop and hitchhike back to the car at mile forty...)

    I decided to cut it short mainly because I have to work tomorrow and I don't want to be dead... I'm already very sore... I'm not sure how the extra twenty miles would have done me...

    So my friend says we failed because we didn't "finish" what we set out to do... We didn't finish the trail and I have never seen the last ten miles of it... (we have section biked it before)

    I say I am not a failure because I DOUBLED my previous longest bike... I didn't once say "I can't do this it's too hard lets go home I'm finished" (although he claims my cutting it short was saying that)... I say I'm not a failure because I don't know many people who can do 140 miles let alone people my age and weight (I'm still 270#)...


    So am I a failure? Is this a guy thing I don't understand? My friend has this thing about "completing" things that feels almost neurotic to me...

    You went on with a blister on your butt. Tell your friend to kiss it.
  • Redtango76
    Redtango76 Posts: 144
    Options
    The only person that is a failure is the one who never tries!

    You mapped out a goal , you tried and you made it 95% of the way on your first attempt at that distance ! I'd say that's damn good! Next time you'll be wiser ,stronger and will make it the rest of the way ! Life is about practice ! It's not supposed to be perfect the first and every time we try ...yay for you ! You have accomplished something Ive only thought about trying and with 50# more to carry ! I'm actually a little envious that you've done it and I haven't ! ( I just read WILD) keep it up and don't listen to your friend !

Categories

Do you Love MyFitnessPal? Have you crushed a goal or improved your life through better nutrition using MyFitnessPal?
Share your success and inspire others. Leave us a review on Apple Or Google Play stores!