"southern hospitality" myth or no?

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  • Jen_Jennings
    Jen_Jennings Posts: 124 Member
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    I'm a native Texan and I'm hospitable. I don't say "bless your heart". That saying drives me crazy. lo..

    It's my understanding that 'bless your heart' is the same as us on the west coast saying "Maam".
  • TyFit08
    TyFit08 Posts: 799 Member
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    I grew up in Tennessee, and most southerners are nice to your face, but then go talk trash about you when you leave. I see my grandmother and my entire family do this all the time, and it is annoying. I'm like you OP. I'd rather know upfront if someone doesn't like me.

    ^^^ THIS! and the women in polyester church clothes are the worst! At least in the midwest, they just straight up say things. I'm not fond of the old slave states...still a lot of issues, unfortunately.

    Many are absolutely closed minded on all areas of race, lifestyles, etc.... That is my biggest issue.

    Mine as well. While racism and ignorance exists everywhere, Some Southerners only apply Southern Hospitality to people like them.
  • Jen_Jennings
    Jen_Jennings Posts: 124 Member
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    I grew up in Tennessee, and most southerners are nice to your face, but then go talk trash about you when you leave. I see my grandmother and my entire family do this all the time, and it is annoying. I'm like you OP. I'd rather know upfront if someone doesn't like me.

    ^^^ THIS! and the women in polyester church clothes are the worst! At least in the midwest, they just straight up say things. I'm not fond of the old slave states...still a lot of issues, unfortunately.

    Many are absolutely closed minded on all areas of race, lifestyles, etc.... That is my biggest issue.

    Mine as well. While racism and ignorance exists everywhere, Some Southerners only apply Southern Hospitality to people like them.

    I've read articles written about (recent) stories in the south and it's hard to believe some of the things they still believe in and some of the things they do. I can't stand when southerners fly the confederate flag w/o the american flag next to it. Yes it was a part of their past but the only msg it's sending when not flown with the american flag is hate. Racism cuts me to my core!
  • darrcn5
    darrcn5 Posts: 495 Member
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    I totally agree! I live in the South, and we have a lot of rude people here. I can't tell you how many times I have had someone nearly run me over at a store coming out of an aisle and then scoff at me like it was my fault.
  • Jen_Jennings
    Jen_Jennings Posts: 124 Member
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    I totally agree! I live in the South, and we have a lot of rude people here. I can't tell you how many times I have had someone nearly run me over at a store coming out of an aisle and then scoff at me like it was my fault.

    That's our older generation here on the west coast....
  • jasondcooper
    jasondcooper Posts: 125
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    I grew up in Tennessee, and most southerners are nice to your face, but then go talk trash about you when you leave. I see my grandmother and my entire family do this all the time, and it is annoying. I'm like you OP. I'd rather know upfront if someone doesn't like me.

    Thank you! Part of it is small town/small world but my workplace is the gossipiest place you've ever seen. At the end of the day, I don't think the South has the market cornered on polite people. "Yes sir" and "yes ma'am" only goes so far. Overall, the South would be better off if her people were a smidge more open-minded.
  • Raynne413
    Raynne413 Posts: 1,527 Member
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    I'm sorry but there are rude people EVERYWHERE. Not just in the South.
  • Penfoldsplace
    Penfoldsplace Posts: 159
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    I have only been to America once (I am from uk) to Texas. My first experience at the airport wasn't great. I have never been spoken to so rudely in my life ( and I've lived in London! haha). I know they have a serious job to do but I am a very polite introvert person I gave them no reason to be like that with me as if I had a nerve visiting their country. Anyway despite that I met some great texans on my short trip, every place has their rude people. There were some people that came across as some of the nicest people I have ever met and others that were less sincere, like any place it's a mixed bag. I wouldn't say it was more hospitable than other places I have been but I was only there for short time.
  • MySunshine76
    MySunshine76 Posts: 389
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    Southern hospitality is alive and well. We don't "pretend" to like people, we are raised to respect people..............UNTIL given a reason not to. So if your a stranger you are treated with hospitality and graciousness until we believe you don't deserve it. Then, the guns come out. Because we do all have one........or ten.:wink: We are taught to respect our elders, not to ask for handouts, to get dirty if and when necessary (sometimes just because we want to), and to work hard for what we have. In my neck of the woods in SC, the girls are taught how to act like ladies, how to hunt and skin animals, and how to fight like men. All that being said, you have our respect until you abuse it, then we can whoop your *kitten*, gut you like a hog, and hide you in the swamp.:devil:

    Classy LMFAO = "until we believe you don't deserve it. Then, the guns come out. Because we do all have one.... All that being said, you have our respect until you abuse it, then we can whoop your *kitten*, gut you like a hog, and hide you in the swamp". I'll take Cali anytime over that classless act. Who says that stuff? Deliverance much? "He got a real pretty mouth ain't he?" :/

    We do all have guns. We believe in our right to have one and we certainly believe in self-defense. We are taught to survive without all of the pansy crap. Like for instance, what would your "cali" behind do if you couldn't go to a grocery store....ever......p*ssy crap like you would starve to death. We, on the other hand, can hunt, fish, clean them, cook, and make clothes. We can grow our own vegetables, which is what we do most of the time anyway, and we don't have to have electricity to live, because unlike people like you, our lives do not revolve around technology. And every woman, can do all these things, and still have her lipstick and hair perfect. You don't know what classy is, you pick a quote that's gay as hell, from a pathetic excuse for a movie. So what does that say about you?
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
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    I'm sorry but there are rude people EVERYWHERE. Not just in the South.
    That is what I was trying to say. There ARE rude people everywhere and that includes the "hospitable southerners".
  • kgb6days
    kgb6days Posts: 880 Member
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    it pays to be nice when everyone carries guns

    Having just returned from the range, I have to agree with you!
  • kgb6days
    kgb6days Posts: 880 Member
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    We relocated from PA to NC and I will say that people here are 150% nicer than they are in PA. There are crappy people everywhere but the "general attitude" down here is a lot more relaxed........... of course living at the beach doesn't hurt that, either. Everyone's on "island time". The niceness sort of freaked me out at first but now I like it, it's sweet.

    And yes, southern women are a lot more put together. They always look nice, haha. :)

    I'm from NC, and we went on a trip 'up north'. Only place we were treated rude was in PA. Actually had eye rolling at me because of my southern accent. Had to spell coffee at one place, just to have them repeat "Oh, you mean caf'ee" and laugh. We've been back just because we love Gettysburg, but every time it's been the same.
  • sbilyeu75
    sbilyeu75 Posts: 567 Member
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    I'm from Ohio but lived in Louisiana for a short time. I don't think they are any nicer, unless you're the right color.
  • rickgomez2003
    rickgomez2003 Posts: 91
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    I am originally from Lubbock Texas and there is definitely Southern hospitality. There is a huge difference between the people from any where else and from home.
  • Cindy311
    Cindy311 Posts: 780 Member
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    I'm a born and raised Tennessean, and there are nice and hateful people here just like everywhere else in the world. I was in Idaho for a few days and the people there seemed to be sincerely friendly and nice. I have found the locals where I live to be a little more unfriendly because of the huge influx of out of towners moving in and "taking over" here. My own Mom has said that the ones that move here are nicer than the people raised here, lol!
  • PearonaPair
    PearonaPair Posts: 80
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    it pays to be nice when everyone carries guns
    :laugh:
  • meandtwocats
    meandtwocats Posts: 30
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    This topic caught my eye because my husband went to work in Harrison Arkansas and I went with. I have never been treated so badly in my life. I went clothes shopping and the lady at the shop told me I probably would not find anything at her shop and just where did I find what I was wearing. Levi's and a short sleave t-shirt? Smile and say hello usually got a snear in response. I came back to N. California after 3 months yet his job was for two years. We went to TN and that was the nices trip and everyone we met was lovely. Had the same experience in MS. Must be hit and miss where ever you go.
  • urloved33
    urloved33 Posts: 3,323 Member
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    come to connecticut you will run for the south!
  • MelStrey
    MelStrey Posts: 60
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    Southern Hospitality is about etiquette, not about sincerity. I've lived all over the world and I have to say the French have always been the best. That being said, we each have our own experiences. My mum is from the South and she is the loveliest lady with impeccable manners. She is also the most nosiest, sarcastic woman who can deliver a back-handed compliment so well you'd be flattered. Then she'll call the local social-ton and gossip until she has to fabricate to keep the tale interesting. But hey, she's me mum and I love her.
  • whitetiger011680
    whitetiger011680 Posts: 218 Member
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    Having lived all over the country, people in or from the south are no nicer and more
    Hospitable.
    In fact, I prefer to know right away when somebody doesnt like me.
    Rather than somebody saying "well bless her heart" as you walk away.
    Nice people are nice people wherever you go.


    ...most people know that "bless her/your/his heart isn't a compliment or anything well intended.

    I have also lived in many areas, and everywhere, there are mean people and nice people. However, only the south has the best iced tea unless you can somehow pry the secret from someone!

    I even found nice people in Watts... THAT was amusing.

    **Yes, it does exist. it's just hyped up

    Born and raised in Alabama.

    Fill the kettle (or sauce pot) with water, approximately one quart and bring to a boil.
    At full rolling boil, remove from heat.
    Add 4 family sized Luzianne teabags and cover.
    Let steep 20 minutes.
    Add either 2 cups sugar OR 1-3/4 cup Splenda to a 1-gallon jug.
    (optional) remove teabags from kettle and press against the inside of the jug with a wooden spoon.
    Dispose of teabags.
    Pour steeped tea over sugar / splenda to dissolve.
    Fill jug rest of the way with cold water.
    Refrigerate or pour over ice.

    Walla, Southern Sweet Tea (bless your hearts) :wink:

    I have a fast and flawless method for making tea that any one can do.
    Since my schedule is packed and time limited, I don't boil water to make tea. I use the coffee maker. (I have two of them, one for coffee and one for tea.)
    Fill to the mteal line of a 12 cup carafe 12 cup and pour into the coffee maker.
    Add 8 tea bags. (I use the cheap ones at wal-mart called National Cup best because I don't really care for the taste of Lipton and because they are not indiviually wrapped. I hate having to take the paper wrapper off each bag.)
    Turn coffee maker on. (This is a very important step :laugh: )
    Add 1.25 to 1.5 cups sugar into 1 gallon pitcher.
    Pour the hot tea into the pitcher and stir to melt the sugar.
    Add water up the spout of the pitcher and stir then refrigerate.
    Perfect every time and I never have to watch a boiling pot ot set a timer to make sure it's not forgotten about.

    Enjoy! :drinker:

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