What weightloss does to people
jessicajoy87
Posts: 905
I know a few people who have lost weight. A couple of them have become extremely superficial and straight up selfish and slutty. These people have changed so much that I actually get a little apprehensive about losing weight. Why are people like this? I would think that weightloss would make you humble and very into helping others that were once in your shoes. Any chance one of these people get they try making me feel bad because they were once as big as me and they try to show off and say little double meaning comments about me. I just don't get it and it makes me worry, if I lose weight am I going to become like this? Yes weightloss will make you healthier and more fit but does it really make you a better person?
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If you're already a jerk, it just gives you something else to be a jerk about0
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Chances are those people were like that on the inside before. They were too ashamed to behave in that manner.
I have found that it doesn't change you but, it reveals you.0 -
you'll become whatever you choose to become
no weightloss doesn't make you a better person.
it'll make me sexy as fork though. can't wait0 -
Chances are those people were like that on the inside before. They were too ashamed to behave in that manner.
I have found that it doesn't change you but, it reveals you.
This ^^ or have you ever thought that maybe...juuuuuuust maybe they're not used to getting the attention they've craved for so long and they're finally getting it? That in itself can cause someone to go absolutely wild if they're not able to handle it.0 -
Trying to picture myself in that situation (obviously, I'm still very fat), here are some reasons I can think of that the way I behaved might be perceived that way:
1 - I know how easy it was to get fat, and how hard it was to lose it, so I want to stay focused on maintaining the healthy body rather than putting it back on. Particularly when people keep spouting the "80% of people who lose weight gain it all back" crap.
2 - I'm excited about being fit again after so long, and want to do all sorts of things that I avoided for years due to how ashamed I felt about my weight, or due to being physically unable to do certain things.
That would at least cover "superficial", possibly even "selfish". Can't really speak for "slutty" since I'm married, though I imagine I'd be having a good time if I were still single and suddenly attractive after being obese.0 -
If you're already a jerk, it just gives you something else to be a jerk about
true story.0 -
If you're already a jerk, it just gives you something else to be a jerk about
Yup. This.0 -
thisChances are those people were like that on the inside before. They were too ashamed to behave in that manner.
I have found that it doesn't change you but, it reveals you.0 -
I know several people like this. It is really sad to see actually. I have several clients who have lost weight and ended up in divorce court as well which to me is crazy. My husband loves me for me not for my weight.0
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Some people are douches. Besides, insecurity comes in many forms, sometimes in the form of a wall flower and some times in the form of "LOOK AT ME, EVERYONE OVER HERE AND LOOK AT ME, YOU DON'T WANT TO LOOK AT ME? LET ME MAKE A SPECTACLE OF MYSELF SO THAT YOU'RE FORCED TO LOOK AT ME." If they were unpleasant before, chances are they'll be unpleasant after. This doesn't sound like a reasonable excuse to not make life changes, you are the only person who can control who you are.0
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If you're already a jerk, it just gives you something else to be a jerk about
True that!0 -
It is like saying alcohol makes you a jerk. You were a jerk before and it just magnifies it.0
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Just stay you. They were probably douche bags before, just no one listened to them. Now they feel since they lost weight they're something else. Just ignore them, don't let them get you down and keep strong. Show them what it's like to be humble.
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They were already like that on the inside, but too self-conscious to act on it. now that they have some confidence, they think they can act however they want.0
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I know a few people who have lost weight. A couple of them have become extremely superficial and straight up selfish and slutty.
Oh boy oh boy I can't wait.
Not so much the superficial part, but the slutty part. Oh yeah. I am gonna be a filthy dirty little tramp. Mmmm mmm.0 -
Just because you lose weight doesn't mean you've dealt with your insecurities or inner demons. They are probably projecting how they still feel about themselves by being overconfident and douchey, and will prob end up packing the weight back on in the future. Keep your head up, and find new friends 0
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Chances are those people were like that on the inside before. They were too ashamed to behave in that manner.
I have found that it doesn't change you but, it reveals you.
It doesn't change you, but reveals you....DEEEP!0 -
I know a few people as well and I am completely floored at their behavior. It's just crazy.0
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Weight loss has had nothing but positive influences on me. Sure I start at myself in the mirror a lot more, but who doesn't like admiring their handiwork!? And I've gotten huge boosts in confidence as my waistline shrunk!0
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That just makes me sad to read. I've lost some weight. So has my husband. We both try to encourage folks when the ask us about our weight loss. I never try to make people feel badly. Lord knows our society does that well enough!!!
On the flip side, I have been told by some folks who are over weight that my discussing my races or my training makes them mad. They HATE to listen to me. Not that I blather, but they happen to be in the room when others **ask** about that stuff. I've been told that my "skinny-ness" (Puh-lease!) makes this one person in particular angry. Wow. Talk about a downer!!!
I think if a person is kindhearted to begin with, they'll be that way regardless of their size. But, just realize, some of us who are currently fit, may not realize our comments about fitness are recieved by others as negative. I'm working hard to keep my trap shut around this particular person. And, I find myself wearing bulkier clothes when I know I'll see her as well.0 -
This sounds like nothing more than an excuse to justify not working hard to lose weight. How other people act after changing has zero effect on how you will be after your weight loss. If you look for excuses not to lose weight, you will find them.0
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Yes, I agree with the sentiment that it was always within them. Maybe the fat acted as a filter for that behavior?
I think once I get rid of my "Fat Shield" with +5 awkwardness, I'll be the same person.
I hope my fat isn't filtering a honey boo boo child.0 -
I can't speak for them, considering I don't know them. I lost about 40 lbs from 210 to 170. My biggest issue is with my brother, who couldn't do a ride/activity with me because there was a 250 lb weight limit. I care about him a lot, but nothing I seem to do will get to help him. I try to be supportive of him, but I could easily imagine some things I say he might take offensive, but I don't know what else to do.
What I'm trying to say is that they may be trying to help, but some people are too defensive about their weight. They know they are big and they don't like how they look, but they don't have the motivation/desire to do it. No offense, but it kinda seems like that's you right now. Are you really concerned you're going to change your personality and be mean and THAT'S why you don't want to lose weight, or are you afraid you'll lose motivation and not be able to do it?0 -
Some people are douches. Besides, insecurity comes in many forms, sometimes in the form of a wall flower and some times in the form of "LOOK AT ME, EVERYONE OVER HERE AND LOOK AT ME, YOU DON'T WANT TO LOOK AT ME? LET ME MAKE A SPECTACLE OF MYSELF SO THAT YOU'RE FORCED TO LOOK AT ME." If they were unpleasant before, chances are they'll be unpleasant after. This doesn't sound like a reasonable excuse to not make life changes, you are the only person who can control who you are.
This.
A lot of really overweight people are using food as a comfort or defense mechanism for something else: low self-esteem; fear; loneliness. So, they've beaten the symptom--overeating and being overweight. But they still have the problem. Take sluttiness for example: Maybe the person used to overeat when they felt worthless; now she is seeking male attention to make her feel worthwhile. Or, the insults: maybe they are so afraid of returning to what they once were (overweight), that they insult you or other overweight people to reinforce in their own heads why they don't want to ever be overweight again.
Or maybe skinny people were really mean to them when they were overweight, and so now they are skinny, they think they should be mean to overweight people.
Extreme weight loss should probably be accompanied by some time with a counselor to deal with the other issues. If you are working so hard to be beautiful on the outside, isn't it worth it to work to be equally beautiful on the inside? Instead of slutty?0 -
It's called overcompensating. Maybe they are feeling insecure about being in a "new body". It's possible that it's a phase they're going through and won't last forever.0
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I know what you mean. I had a friend in primary school that was fat and she had a nice personality but she was a bit shy. Everybody laughet at her, you know how kids can be cruel.
So she lost weight and she went to bed with the first guy who layed eyes on her. And the next guy. And next. You get the picture.
But she was still a good friend, she just became slutty.
I don't approve it but i understand her. She never felt beautiful and likeble before and she gone crazy when someone payed attention to her.0 -
I agree if they were like that before they were fat and then they will be like that when they lose the weight, also, if when they were fat they still thought others were fat then of course they'd still make snide comments on others being fat.
But I have a really good friend that took her weight loss journey almost 2 years ago and went from 180 to 115 and she started a support group for us fatties from high school, but she noticed that some of the girls we went to high school with would try to join b/c they wanted to see how much we were weighing so that they could make fun of us, b/c each week we do a weigh-in and we put our week before weight and current weight and how much we lost. So, she made it a private page and now she makes sure that you are "fat" and really do want to lose the weight to join, and she has been nothing but supportive to us 10 girls that are wanting to lose our baby fat, and she never tells anyone about our weight loss journey she leaves it up to us to tell others. And her page is only for women as well, so that is great! But she's amazing she'd never tell someone that they needed to lose weight unless they came to her to talk to her about her weight loss and then she tells them how she did it and asks if they want to join her support group.
But I have noticed others who have lost weight be the biggest jerks, and I think I may have become that as well b/c I was super skinny, popular and all that crap in high school and college until I got married and started having kids, so I think I would have become a witch after my weight loss if it wasn't for my friend who has 100% supported me through this weight loss.0 -
I know a few people who have lost weight. A couple of them have become extremely superficial and straight up selfish and slutty.
Oh boy oh boy I can't wait.
Not so much the superficial part, but the slutty part. Oh yeah. I am gonna be a filthy dirty little tramp. Mmmm mmm.
Jeeze! Lol! Well at least you are honest!0 -
This sounds like nothing more than an excuse to justify not working hard to lose weight. How other people act after changing has zero effect on how you will be after your weight loss. If you look for excuses not to lose weight, you will find them.
Not looking for an excuse I am just wondering why. I have other issues why I'm not losing weight. Its just something I thought about today.0 -
Oh boy oh boy I can't wait.
Not so much the superficial part, but the slutty part. Oh yeah. I am gonna be a filthy dirty little tramp. Mmmm mmm.
Mmm yeah you're daddy's little girl0
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