"You would be STUNNING if you just lost some weight"

adorability
adorability Posts: 49 Member
in Motivation and Support
Has anyone ever gotten this "compliment" before? Why am I not stunning now? :( Idk, it just hurts...like the only way I'll ever be desirable is if I'm skinny.
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Replies

  • ladyfingers73
    ladyfingers73 Posts: 80 Member
    Oh yeah, I've been told that my whole life.
  • 2Bgoddess
    2Bgoddess Posts: 1,096 Member
    yeah, as well as "you have such a pretty FACE". cuz the rest sucks? people need to stop talking about 20 seconds sooner.
  • pastryari
    pastryari Posts: 8,646 Member
    Don't focus on this one person. There are people out there that find you stunning now. There are also people who don't find you attractive at all. Everyone has different tastes. Some people are a little rude about their opinions but you have to deal with it.
  • KalikaRae
    KalikaRae Posts: 37 Member
    Your beautiful now. If they gotta problem with it, tell them to shove it! Not to mention, todays idea of "beauty" for most people is ridiculous. Ive seen so called beautiful super models. Gross!!
  • poll09
    poll09 Posts: 549 Member
    i feel like that my family is like that but u are pretty x
  • pudgeylou
    pudgeylou Posts: 202 Member
    I get the "you have a pretty face" compliment...but the rest of this comment is....too bad the rest sucks. I also get a lot of "you have such a wonderful perosnality". I hate those people, in those cases, they just need to keep their compliments to themselves.
  • ladyfingers73
    ladyfingers73 Posts: 80 Member
    I get the "you have a pretty face" compliment...but the rest of this comment is....too bad the rest sucks. I also get a lot of "you have such a wonderful perosnality". I hate those people, in those cases, they just need to keep their compliments to themselves.

    Girlfriend, a lot of people's personalities suck, so be glad you have a nice one! LOL I take pride in having a "wonderful personality". It's a loveable trait...run with it. :)
  • Leeanne1974
    Leeanne1974 Posts: 207 Member
    I have had that.
    As soon as i get the "you have such a pretty face" I usually reply with "And a massive ar$e, I know".
    Even my nan has said to me "You have such a beautiful face but you do need to lose some weight". I know she means it from the heart so I don't take it badly from her.
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    OOoh yeah. I got this a lot. "You are too young/pretty to be so fat." "You have such a pretty face" "I wish you could lose the weight so you could get a good boyfriend." Gee, thanks Grandma for your support. Now she says she's jealous, even though I'm still a good 40 pounds away from my goal. And I met my boyfriend last year when I was less than half way to my goal sooo yeah. Some people don't think before flapping their jaw.
  • FlyByJuly
    FlyByJuly Posts: 564 Member
    Years ago, a boyfriend said to me "You'd have a great figure if you lost some weight." I was too kind to say to him "And you'd be handsome if only you'd have a face transplant."
  • ladyfingers73
    ladyfingers73 Posts: 80 Member
    Umm yeah...lol we call those a "double bagger"

    I see guys on this board, amazing bodies..and well the face doesn't match...he needs a bag over his head...poor fella. It goes both ways.
  • sunshine_gem
    sunshine_gem Posts: 390 Member
    My own father said that to me years ago. He wasn't trying to be malicious, he just didn't think. It had it's effect though and that is unfortunately irreversible.
  • Impy84
    Impy84 Posts: 430
    hmmmm....i WOULD be stunning if i lost these last 40 lbs. simple fact
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    Years ago, a boyfriend said to me "You'd have a great figure if you lost some weight." I was too kind to say to him "And you'd be handsome if only you'd have a face transplant."

    Great comeback!
  • jfan175
    jfan175 Posts: 812 Member
    "And you'd be handsome if only you'd have a face transplant."

    FTW!
  • Anayalata
    Anayalata Posts: 391 Member
    I often think it I'll admit, but I never say it.

    Women be too fragilE
  • head_in_rainbows
    head_in_rainbows Posts: 290 Member
    My own father said that to me years ago. He wasn't trying to be malicious, he just didn't think. It had it's effect though and that is unfortunately irreversible.


    My mother said that too me too but tbh unlike most people here I am grateful for it. If that is how she felt ... I prefere to hear: " I love you, you are beautiful to me and always will but you should loose some weight." It is honest. and real. I prefer my loved ones to tell me the truth instead of pretty lies
  • RawVeganFlirt
    RawVeganFlirt Posts: 189 Member
    yes... from my mother... a million times
  • nak726
    nak726 Posts: 2
    oh yeah and it hurts
  • Ddmck1
    Ddmck1 Posts: 89 Member
    Oh yes! My whole life... and comments like

    "If you just trimmed down a little"
    "You would make a gorgeous plus size model"
    "You have a beautiful face/smile/hair"
  • AnninStPaul
    AnninStPaul Posts: 1,372 Member
    but they will ALWAYS be stupid.
  • ConnorLynne65
    ConnorLynne65 Posts: 91 Member
    Yeah I have heard that for years. It is always hurtful even when I know people mean well by saying it, it feels like a dagger every time. I would never say that to anyone. I have gotten a lot of the "you have such a pretty face" and less frequently I have heard the more obvious and direct " you would be so gorgeous if you lost weight " that is just ridiculous to try to pass off as a compliment. Even when I was at my thinnest (140) and I was killing myself trying to be thin I still got those comments. Rude.
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
    Ahhhhh yeah, that's not a compliment. I know that the older generation of people usually mean in lovingly but that doesn't make it easier to hear. I think in their day that was called "motivation".

    I will say though...that I had no idea what I actually looked like until I lost the weight- no idea!! People constantly say "I don't even recognize you!" and honestly, they don't. It's weird.
  • MsSheri82
    MsSheri82 Posts: 16
    i ge it all the time or I get this one...." You're pretty for a big girl"....like really?? is it rare that a big woman is pretty or something?
  • kubyshechka
    kubyshechka Posts: 75 Member
    YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!
  • Anayalata
    Anayalata Posts: 391 Member
    yes... from my mother... a million times

    My mother does the same too.

    I remember when I used to be heavier that she'd tell me that I should lose some weight.

    Then after I lost 60lbs she told me I used to look better when I was heavier.

    The psychological damage is amazing. I'm fully aware of it but it persists nonetheless.
  • adorability
    adorability Posts: 49 Member
    My ex-boyfriend, after we broke up in May, told me I was fat and disgusting and sleeping with me was revolting. I so wanted to say, "Hey, I can lose weight, and for free, but you need plastic surgery to fix that face of yours, and that costs thousands of dollars" HOWEVER, I kept my mouth closed because I didn't want to stoop to his level.

    Thank you all for sharing your stories, I hear this comment EVERY day and sometimes I wonder who I'm losing weight for :/ I want people to like me for WHO I am, not what I look like.
  • laurenellenmarie
    laurenellenmarie Posts: 331 Member
    My favorite was "I'm so glad you're not in a huge rush to get married. Nobody likes a fat bride."
  • rm830
    rm830 Posts: 531 Member
    Yep heard it my whole life...and the "you have a pretty face, you just need to lose the weight". Ugh...it's horrible to hear stuff like that!
  • Xstitcher74
    Xstitcher74 Posts: 124 Member
    Years ago, a boyfriend said to me "You'd have a great figure if you lost some weight." I was too kind to say to him "And you'd be handsome if only you'd have a face transplant."

    Been there!

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