Single... FOREVER

I think I just found all the redditors

I have a *lot* of single friends..and I'm around their single friends a lot as well.
Here is a list of why they are still single. The 1st 5 apply to ALL of them!

They're looking in the wrong place to meet potential dates
Their requirements of a date is completely unrealistic
Their communication dating skills are poorly lacking. from the end of not able to talk much, to being an alpha conversationalist.
They're looking TOO hard/ not hard enough.
They go out with the wrong crowd and diminishes their chances of meeting other people.
women, you go with 1 friend or more than 2 friends, you are killing your chances! 3 is the lady's night out magical number.
Men! same with you! but you can get away with 4- 6 AND! Be careful who you are with. You don't want to hang with the chick who loudly condemns men. (or women) or are, in general negative people.

They are egotistical, and brag about how AWESOME they are ALL. THE. TIME.
The have a very low self-esteem and always beating up on themselves.
They can't stfu about politics, religion and OS's when out with friends (You don't want this friend with you when you're out with the goal of meeting potential dates) EVER. or the older guy who obnoxiously/blatantly and obnoxiously flirts with every female who has a heart beat. even their 22 yr old waitress.
They try a dating website and quit out after the second bad date.
They don't try groups for single people to meet, such as meet-up. where they have parties/events for single people. From bowling to dinners. from large picnics at the lake to sand volleyball.

Their scope of finding people is extremely limited. I know my butcher, seafood manager, the two people who regularly check me out at the grocery store. I say hi to my mailman when I see him at the mall. I know my pharmacists. I know many of the bartenders downtown, and I know the clerk at the gas station I go to. I say Hi to people. I don't just pass people and simply ignore them. On NYE 1999, I didn't have to buy myself one drink. Why? Because everyone knew and loved me. Not because I was awesome, because I listen to people, acknowledge their existence and make them feel important. It doesn't matter if it's the guy who comes in after yoga every day, or helping some random customer get the very last of our awesome soup. I got tickets to his gig that night. Of course, later I had to bail on him, but I met some great people. I met one boyfriend walking out of a store. he approached me, mistook me for someone else. I chided him that "Oh, you just wanted to talk to me! and I jokingly laughed at him. we dated 3 or 4 months. I met my ex husband when he was lost and was asking me for directions. We had a great thing for awhile, but our lives were just going a different path. I met my current husband at a bar. we were both dragged there that night by other friends. we were friends for quite awhile before he asked me out. My friend that dragged me there he said "But you ALWAYS talk to people..meet new people..I NEED you there!" he met his future wife that night, too.



You will be single forever if you don't figure out the skills of meeting new people as well as people who can be potential dates. If you go around "acting like the c0ck of the walk, best lookin thing in town" no one is going to approach you, no one wants rejection! If you walk around with obvious low self-esteem and are cold to everyone around you, you won't be as approachable.

You will be approached only when approachable. To do that, acknowledge other people's existence with a smile and a nod. People will usually watch you before they consider approaching you. If they feel like you will reject them, they'll move on. If it's just running into someone and you say 'whatever" and move on... you missed a possible chance of meeting new people. The more people you know, the higher the chance of meeting 'that person'

Ladies, if you look high maintenance, you are less approachable. even if you're the friendliest person in the world. My friends always get annoyed with me "You always dress so plainly, but guys ALWAYS talk to you!!" uhm... jeans. t'shirt/ blouse smile on my face. You can't get lower maintenance than that! You will *never* catch me checking my make up or hair in public, or tugging at my jeans/blouse in public. baaaad!! learn to do it discretely or use the bathroom! Men ARE watching you, your body language, how your day might have gone, and the best way to approach you.

Men! We want you to talk to us! Most of us don't bite, really. Even if you just say hi. come to our table, come up with something stupid even "you ladies look like you're having a great time!" as you walk by. introduce yourself, point out your buddies and say something silly. have some things ready in your head to say in various situations. Sure some might scoff at you, but don't give up. **Just please make sure your hand isn't sweaty. One guy did this to us at a bar.. I'm sure we would have talked to him a minute or two longer.
A; his pants weren't ridiculously sagging
B; his hand wasn't dripping grossly of sweat.
Women are watching you. typically the moment when you walk into a bar. We size you up based on how you walk, interact with your friends and how you weave through the crowd. The 1st 3 minutes you walk into a bar/ event is actually critical!
When you approach a woman, you have ONE minute to make her laugh. Women are picky creatures and we make up our minds fast because chances are, we have already assessed you. If you are at our table, other guys won't approach us. A second route is to run into us when we are not at our table for whatever reason.

Men/women, if you go to a bar, chose one where you typically have to go to the bar to get your drink. This will give you better chances at meeting someone at a bar.

If you chose the single group events for things like meet-in, don't go to events you have no interest in. When you get there, say hi to people. and figure out how to strike up a conversation. even if you're just commenting on the food you brought. and talk to people of both genders!

If you say you'll be alone forever and resign to that idea. You probably will be. Yes, there will be @ssholes along the way... but if you don't sort through the @ssholes, you won't meet any good ones, either.

I know this is long..I hope this benefits someone!

If you go around "acting like the c0ck of the walk, best lookin thing in town" no one is going to approach you, no one wants rejection!

This. The #1 thing men think when approaching a woman is "is she going to reject me?" A lot of things factor into equation:

In short, do everything you can to signal "I won't cut your balls off".

WOW....I completely disagree...unless I'm misunderstanding. But, being confident is one of the sexiest things there is. To me, people mistake women with confidence for women who think they are God's gift to everything.

Well, you're not a man, my dear friend! Men mostly don't want to be rejected.

While a *lack* of confidence is unattractive, and confidence is always good thing... too much, to the point of appearing arrogant or cocky a key predictor of being totally shut down. Perhaps men do make this mistake, I'm just describing what goes through our mind when we decide to approach or not.

Now, if you're a man, a bit of fun cockiness can go a long way. Very different.

There is confidence, and then there is this superior attitude that your body language can easily give away.