What do you think about Interracial relationships?

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  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    The only potential issue I could see coming up would be cultural, which doesn't always have much to do with race. For example, I've had four Asian roommates over the years. The first three were great. They were all born in the US and loved their cultural background, which I liked learning about too. But the last one was from Taiwan and had come to the US a couple years before. We were good friends, but once we lived together it fell apart. Our cultural expectations of each other were so different, and there was endless conflict. That's not to say a marriage between people of two different cultures can't work, but I can imagine that it could be very difficult unless they were devoted to trying to understand each other and making compromises.
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    I have asked once or twice to most (many) of my interracial couple friends and they've repeatedly said they rarely if ever experience the level of prejudice you are describing so it isn't my opinion, this statement is coming from them. Of course I live in southern California, don't know if that has something to do with it. Here you could probably have a relationship with a small farm animal and people wouldn't look twice.

    Being from California has a LOT to do with it
  • KuroNyankoSensei
    KuroNyankoSensei Posts: 288 Member
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    Down to the molecular level, every human is only about 0.03% different from one another. The 0.03% makes up the genetic, phenotypical variances from human to human, such as hair color, eye color, and skin color.

    Why judge on such trivial things when there's only but a minuscule difference between a person from one race to another ;3?
  • smithntuck
    smithntuck Posts: 113 Member
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    My sister has always dated black men, it's just who she's attracted to. We were raised to believe that color doesn't matter, love does. All of my neices and nephews are mixed, and I know sometimes she has a hard time with certain things because of it, but if He treats her right, why should it matter?
  • seximami79
    seximami79 Posts: 156 Member
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    I'm in an interracial relationship, and I am fine with it. It is nice to have different point of views, but it can be difficult at times because we have such different upbringings. It definitely requires a lot of communication and patience with people who are more closed minded...we live in Texas where there are still a lot of super racist small towns. We have a baby, and he has two previous kids and I have one...I think that is more challenging-to meld a blended family, but that is the most important thing to smooth over to me. Other people's opinions don't have such a heavy weight because I am not in a relationship for them, even though it must be factored into people's reactions. It affects our social life and how we are treated b/c AA ladies give me dirty looks and C people stare at him...we just laugh about it, and we have beautiful children! Good enough for me. Plus, I am half Vietnamese and half Russian Jewish, so I'd be hardpressed to date within my race anyway, lol
  • mavrick7
    mavrick7 Posts: 1,607 Member
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    I have asked once or twice to most (many) of my interracial couple friends and they've repeatedly said they rarely if ever experience the level of prejudice you are describing so it isn't my opinion, this statement is coming from them. Of course I live in southern California, don't know if that has something to do with it. Here you could probably have a relationship with a small farm animal and people wouldn't look twice.

    Being from California has a LOT to do with it
    It is more accepted on the West Coast than other parts of the US. Growing up in Hawaii, the majority of couples are mixed race. I also agree with your other statement, if they are American, race is not an issue. When they are born and raised in another country, they are bound by cultural expectations and often "conservative" beliefs from their parents and other family members.
  • MsColetteRenee
    MsColetteRenee Posts: 1
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    I think interracial relationships are beautiful. Believe it or not, according to the census, marriages between white men and black women have the lowest divorce rate of all!

    http://blackwomen.diydating.com/index.php
  • AABru
    AABru Posts: 610 Member
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    Race and gender should not be an issue, just species.
    ^^^This totally! Although, race implies different species, so technically among humans there is no such thing as interracial relationships...only interethnic relationships. :drinker: Biologically speaking, the more different you are the better your gene pool for offspring!
  • Jess207
    Jess207 Posts: 90
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    Variety is the spice of life!!
  • Jess207
    Jess207 Posts: 90
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    My 1st wife was a Russian Jew.
    My 2nd wife was Italian Catholic.
    My 3rd wife was Czech Christian.
    My wife now was raised Mormon. European mutt.


    Dated all races, religions, backgrounds. There can sometimes be external pressures that are difficult to overcome. Gotta take a "them and us" attitude sometimes.

    Good for you...you sound like an open, fun person!! Life's too short to be narrow minded :smile:
  • danithegirl89
    danithegirl89 Posts: 203 Member
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    I'm white and my boyfriend is Asian (Laotian). Sometimes people give us weird looks, but we are kind of a weird looking couple I guess because I am tall lol. But really it shouldn't matter at all. I love him so much. I don't think my (hillbilly) dad is overly happy, but you have to do what makes you happy. Being with someone who treats you well no matter what color their skin is. :)
  • mavrick7
    mavrick7 Posts: 1,607 Member
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    Race and gender should not be an issue, just species.

    Joolie - LOL, was that a joke? I noticed in your profile pic there was a women next to a Blue Jay Mascot. What are you trying to say?
  • George1906
    George1906 Posts: 1 Member
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    My advice is to just keep being with each other and love each other to the fullest because I am also in an interracial relationship as my girlfriend is white and we have been together for 5 months now and love each other and want to be with each other and spend as much time as we possibly can with one another and do not care what folks think because they don't have the relationship that we have and are just being petty and jealous that two people from different background and the color spectrum can actually find love!
  • BuckwheatsMomma
    BuckwheatsMomma Posts: 32 Member
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    Sweetie, interracial relationships are not new. White and Asian folks (and others) have been mixing since the beginning.

    Yes, you may have some foolish folks who have issues with it, but they are not the majority, and who cares anyway?

    If your man makes you happy that is all that matters.

    What is a "hillbilly" dad?
  • caslyn3
    caslyn3 Posts: 70 Member
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    I think if you have to ask people what they think, then you may have some inner judgment on yourself. Obviously you care about what others think about the relationship, whereas you should worry more about how you feel about it. Is he your first other race boyfriend? I used to feel self conscience when I was with my black boyfriend.. just because my family is old school and had raised me to not mix.. but I don't care what anyone else thinks or feels about how I live my life.. I have a white daughter, I date both white and black men.. My last boyfriend was black.. I think if he makes you happy, then that is all that matters..
  • snoopynut1972
    snoopynut1972 Posts: 49 Member
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    Didn't even know it was an issue anymore...certainly, as a society weve come further than that! Good luck and God bless. BE HAPPY and treat each other well and it's all good!

    Yep, it can still be an issue. The saddest thing is that the most friction can be from family.

    This is so true. My husband is black, born and raised in the Virgin Islands. I'm as white as they come. LOL The first time I met his parents we traveled 8 hours to see them at Christmas. I was the first girl he'd ever brought home to meet the family. I was like the person who said they didn't think it was an issue anymore, and didn't even think twice about it. My husband didn't either. But the surprise on his mother's face when she opened the door to greet us told me that he hadn't told momma he was bringing home a white girl. It's quite comical now, and they have always treated me like family.

    The following spring we went out west to see my family for the first time. My mom said "you probably should send your grandparents a picture of you two so there isn't any shock when they meet Troy". I was like "seriously". She was afraid them being from that generation when it wasn't as widely accepted they might be taken aback by it. They accepted him and treated him like one of the grandkids right from the start.

    So you never know how people are going to react. I have a friend who's mother disowned her when she married her black husband. They are the happiest and most in love couple I've ever known. So sad, as it shouldn't matter race, gender, or religion as long as two people love one another.

    So don't worry what others think. All that matters is that you love and respect one another.
  • halobender
    halobender Posts: 780 Member
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    My girlfriend and I joke about it a lot. We pretend to see racism everywhere. If someone cuts us off while we're driving we joke that it must be because she's black and I'm a white boy. But quite honestly I don't think it's really much of an issue for anyone. There are probably people who give us sly looks but I honestly don't notice nor care.

    It seems like getting worked up over it, acknowledging it even in the slightest, creates more of an issue than those who might see a problem with it, however. Whinging about racism (or anything, really) only serves to further propagate the issue.
  • brainfreeze72
    brainfreeze72 Posts: 180 Member
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    I'm a white American and my husband is a white American. That being said, one of my cousins (white American Christian) just married an Indian gentleman (Hindu) and another cousin just got engaged to a Brazilian woman. My pastor at our church is a Filipino woman and the previous pastor was a white American woman who was disowned by her parents for marrying a black African man. My daughter is a Christian and her best friend is Jewish. My daughter goes to their house for Hannukah and her friend helps us decorate our Christmas tree. The only way I see colors, religions or nationalities is to recognize and respect their beliefs and try not to offend anyone. I try to learn about different religions and ways of life to avoid being an ignorant jerk. I hope you don't worry too much about what others think when they see you with your man. As long as the two of you are happy together and can let the negativity roll off your backs then it's all good.
  • stillthesamegirl
    stillthesamegirl Posts: 112 Member
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    I think if you have to ask people what they think, then you may have some inner judgment on yourself. Obviously you care about what others think about the relationship, whereas you should worry more about how you feel about it. Is he your first other race boyfriend? I used to feel self conscience when I was with my black boyfriend.. just because my family is old school and had raised me to not mix.. but I don't care what anyone else thinks or feels about how I live my life.. I have a white daughter, I date both white and black men.. My last boyfriend was black.. I think if he makes you happy, then that is all that matters..

    No .. he is not my first non-white boyfriend. The person I was with for 3 years before was also black. I come from a place where people don't think anything of it.... And I moved to a totally new place where I get looks and treated differently for having a black boyfriend. Not once would it make me think twice about being with him. I was stating that it makes me sick that people still think that way and I'm tired of it. I never said I was self concious or ashamed of it. If I felt that way, I wouldn't be with him or I wouldn't have been with my last boyfriend. I am happy with him and I don't let it get the best of me.. I was asking how others felt about it to see if it was just the area I lived in.
  • amsohs85
    amsohs85 Posts: 166
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    Be with whoever makes you happy...ignore the looks and comments from ignorant people!!

    I'm part mexican, navajo indian, scottish, irish and german. My hair is red and im fair skinned. When i was in highschool there was maybe a handful of hispanic kids there. One had the same last name as me (Garcia). I cant count how many times some idiot walked up and asked if Jose was my brother. I wanted to say "Sure im the redheaded step child they dont talk about!!". Some one asked him the same question once and he told them "Yeah we're twins, can't you tell?" Lol....

    My sisters children are biracial (african american and caucasian). I used to get a kick out of taking her kids out with my oldest three. Since my kids vary in hair and eye color and my sisters son and daughter look very different from each other people would look at me like WTH!!! Once a woman in the grocery store kept staring at us and then she asked if they were all mine..since i felt she was being rude i smiled and said "Yep and they all have different dads too!" People have asked my sister repeatedly if her oldest son is cuban or puerto rican...no one thinks he is part african american. I just think it ridiculous the emphasis thats put on race in this day and age!!!

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