Tired of the compliments??

Another peach here I guess

I also got compliments and questions before I even started... In part it was a small percentage of what motivated me to try harder.

Now, I never liked to be the center of attention, and I have a hard time telling if people really want help and really want to know what I've been doing or if they are just making conversation.
I've sent more than a few this direction, but only a couple have stuck with it and are doing well. I'm chalking the rest up to they weren't really ready to try.

I don't like being asked personal questions in public. Makes me want to say something just being a smart a55. Read on here someone said they told people they drank their first urine in the morning, not seriously, but ive been tempted.

I also think it is a bit rude to ask for how much weight you've lost and expect a number in mixed company. I usually just say "a lot".

Typically I just tell them "diet and exercise" if they persist I explain more, not really dieting more tracking food and exercise.

Today I had someone ask me where did the other half of me go and
i had someone who i hadnt seen in a while but who knew me pretty well not recognise me at all.
I had another who hasn't seen me in a while tell me he wouldn't have recognized me if I hadn't been at work.
I had 2 people last week ask me when I started working at my job (15years ago)... I recognized them but think they weren't sure it was me.

Then they say how great you look, it's hard to be mad at that but occasionally, peach that I am, I think "geez, they must have really thought I looked like crap before"

Granted I am literally 1/2 the size I was before, and no one around remembers, or was there, before I gained my weight. I've also never been one to discuss my medical issues with the general public, so it gets hard for me to explain that the "Big Me" wasn't always big, wasn't that big for all that long either.

I haven't bought new uniform pants, I'm wearing the same size I used to wear, the exact same pants (although they do fit differently and much better). I saved them when I couldn't wear them any more. Not so much because I thought I'd get into them again, but more because they were work uniforms, work purchased them, some were pretty new, and I couldn't bring myself to get rid of them.

Feel the same, in a way I appreciate they notice but I also feel like this has caused people to be the most invasive.
It's right up there for me with being pregnant and having strangers touch your stomach, OMG that made me insane. I don't like touching things after other people, definitely don't want them touching me.

Thank you for posting this, nice to know I'm not the only one with mixed feelings on the compliments.

Its a trade off.. a short time of intense attention followed by a life time of being normal. I've just started my weight loss journey (again) so havent had to deal with the positive attention (looking forward to it sorta) but I do know people who have lost alot of weight and struggled after they became "normal" and every one became used to them as regular size that there wasn't any attention anymore good or bad.. no negative attention for being heavy and then no positive reenforcement for being thin. And they were at a loss and some regained weight because they couldn't handle lack of attention/feedback, and being judged soley on who they were not for being bad for being a fattie or being amazing for losing it. I think being aware of how you feel is the best you can do. .and maybe start journalling your feelings on days you enjoy the attention and days you don't and how to still feel 'happy' on days no one says a damn thing

It's difficult to accept compliments gracefully when you've been treated like *kitten* for most of your life because you're fat.

I appreciate the compliments but I do feel pretty awkward for thanking th for telling me I am tiny now?! It just seems odd to me to thank someone for saying that I am thin you know? I also get asked all the time how I did it. I have my explanation down pat now.

But it sure does beat the jealous haters who tell me to eat something, that they don't want to look/be like me or that I am too thin now. Good thing the only approval that truly matters is our own.

It's difficult to accept compliments gracefully when you've been treated like *kitten* for most of your life because you're fat.

Had to comment on this as I went through a similar thing as the OP. No one noticed the first 20odd pounds but then everyone was commenting after 40 or so and it is lovely and I always say thank you and i offer advice whenever they ask for it. But i also don't like the attention and a lot of people seemed ot think i'd dropped a lot of the weight suddenly (and damagingly) - my mother who is so proud of me will get annoyed when people don't comment on my loss (if they havent seen me for a while) and when she (HAS) to say something it makes me feel really uncomfortable, but she can't help it, she thinks its rude that they dont say anything!!

Becasue of the reason stated by HurracaineElai (who I have quoted above) I found it difficult at first to believe people were being genuine because I was used to negative attention and as i still have a ways to go i struggled to realise they weren't taking the pi$$ out of the fat girl having lost a few pounds. It has taken a while to realise they are being genuine!!!

And the back handed compliement tainted with a little of something else are difficult to take - like 'don't lose anymore now, you've gone far enough' or 'how much more? more than a stone? no, there'll be nothing of you'. If i went to work in a bikini, they'd know where that last 20 odd pounds needed to come off from!!!

But yes OP i understand the attention thing, a new thing i suppose when you've spent most of your life covering up and hiding away!!!

I have the same problem! I am also a teacher and at the end of the school year I recommitted myself to weight loss at 198. When the new school year began I was 185.5. Nobody noticed and I was ok with that. It was only 12.5 pounds afterall. What's really funny is that I mentioned to this one teacher, "Wow, you lost weight over the summer didn't you? You look great!" (She is still bigger than me, but it was a noticeable change). She smiled wide and replied, "Yes! I am down 12 pounds. Thank you!" And then walked away. I was feeling kind of bummed to tell you the truth, after that. How can people notice HER 12 pounds but not mine?

We just completed our 5th week of school and I am now 178.5 (an additional 7 pound loss) and my-oh-my people are starting to notice. I started at a VERY TIGHT size 18 in May 2012 and am now in a loose size 16 (I need to try 14, but am scared it won't fit and I'll feel crushed, LOL).I have student's moms telling me I look thinner, other teachers, students I had years ago that are now in 2nd and 3rd grade, and even moms that I see around campus but have never met. I am getting sick of it actually.

I think it's fine to hear a compliment ONCE IN AWHILE. I think it keeps us motivated and going strong. But to hear it two times a day, sometimes more, is a bit much!! It makes me want to curl up and hide.

I have decided to just be TOTALLY HONEST when people ask. I tell them how much I've lost and how much more I have to go too. One dad the other day said he couldn't believe how thin I was and he kept making this motion on his face (like elongating his chin) and he goes, "Wow! Even your face is just so thin now!" It was quite uncomfortable. A dad! LOL. I just said, "Thanks, I've lost 27 pounds but still have about 50 to go!" He said, "Oh no way.... you look FINE just like that. I don't think you need to lose any more." I said, "Well, I'm wearing size 16 and I'd like to wear at least a size 10 if not smaller." Then I smiled and walked away. LOL! I'm not afraid for anyone to know how big I was before. I couldn't care less. Besides I don't DARE ever go back so where's the shame?

I agree with others though... just smile and nod, maybe throw in a "thanks" and head off. That's what I am doing for the most part now.

I can't get enough of the compliments. They keep me motivated and give a boost of confidence.

Agreed!

I know how you feel, especially if others around you are struggling to lose weight and you seem to have done it effortlessly (simply because they weren't watching). Being successful when others are failing is tough pill to swallow. Of course you want success for yourself and for others, but how do you handle social interactions without sounding like a pretentious jerk after a while?

After a while the compliments start to sound empty and maybe even touched with jealousy. Maybe even more startling are those who compliment and then throw a disclaimer in at the end, like, "It's great that you lost all that weight, but I'm sure you didn't have to deal with _______________."

It is hard, especially when you want everyone to accomplish their goals. I get what you are going through. After a bit the compliments will subside as people get used to the new you. It'll take about 3 months before people stop remembering the old heavy you.

Yup this is what happens. Sometimes the same thing happens to me. You stick out in a society of an over abundance of food and obesity. Sometimes I feel tired of it and would rather blend in. But really, it just means you are exceptional so try to enjoy it. Great job on what you have accomplished for yourself. I hope you are proud and happy and feel good about it and continue to do so, because it changes your life in a magical way.

So glad you brought up the topic because that is my dreaded fear of what will people say
when I walk in the room thinner? I guess sort of the opposite of someone seeing you walking in the room
alot fatter? Kinda dont like people scrutinizing my body Just be glad Im thinner and let that be it.