What was your wake-up call?

When my sister was always heavier than me, she is now on the weight watchers diet and has become smaller than me. I realised that I had to do something, I don't want to look huge against my sister! We go everywhere together! Battle of the sisters I say!!

This. This is the one picture I saw where I broke down to tears. This was July 2, 2011 at a wedding from a dear friend I had in high school.

I was always heavy. I wore size 22 by the time I graduated high school. I was in total denile that my fast food habit (I actually had a meal I called the "fat-girl special") and my eating was going to catch up with me. I remember the first time I had to go to size 24. I kept telling myself that size is only a number. Then before I knew it I was buying 26's and they were tight. I was hoping that the button wouldn't fly off in some humiliating movie type circumstance, busting a window and knocking someone out.

Prior to that, November 2010 (I was 22 at this time) I was put on a double dose of blood pressure medication. My blood pressure was 152/160's. The doctor couldn't believe it. I was blacking out, headaches, and losing mental function. My blood pressure was surging so hard into the brain that the swollen vessels were causing issues. This should have helped me get motivated however it didn't. I accepted my fate. I was a fat piece of *kitten* and I was going to die that way. I was never pretty, I was never loved, I'll just enjoy it until it takes me. It wasn't until July after the wedding where I actually wanted to die. I was so embarassed that people had to even see my fat self and to make matters worse I managed a gym. I managed Curves, A franchise type facility for women and my family owns one. Can you imagine the stares I got when I was the one talking about weight management, diet, and exercise? I am very educated, I know what to do but I was so much a lost cause I said screw it, It isn't for me. We went to a regional meeting april of 2011 and again seeing the pictures of me just made me physcially ill. In july, after the wedding, my grandmother came to me and said that curves had changed the weight management program into a program they call Curves Complete. We said we would give it a try together. 15 pounds came off the first month. I cried. I wasn't that much of a lost cause. This dog had some fight left in her.

It has been 13 months and have been following Curves complete. I love myself. I am sexy, I am curvy (yet I still have a long way to go) and I am 87 pounds down. I ride on average 15 miles a day on my bicycle. I strength train at curves 3x week and do an hour long high intensity zumba class 4x a week. I hold my head high when I walk down the street. I don't go to a restaurant and hear the jokes about "the food being gone" anymore. I walk into the store and pick out size 16/18. I feel like myself. The strong, confident kayla that had once shown it's face was back. I am not some stranger in a fat suit. My husband, who has done this journey with me, is so proud. Our marriage hasn't been better. When I was heavy and at my lowest I didn't care about anyone or anything. On our 4 year anniversary this halloween I will actually dress up like we did years ago.

I am no longer embarassed for people to see me anymore. As I write this I am tearing up but I am telling anyone who doubts, anyone who just wants to dissapear, you can do it.