I just want to give up.

yowla
yowla Posts: 127 Member
Hello, I have been on and off MFP for over a year now. I have logged in everyday for almost 70 days. I have for the most part tracked my foods for the last 2 weeks. But I just can't do this. I don't know how people are losing weight. I don't know how to motivate myself to eat healthy or exercise. I use to be 114lbs and was able to eat what ever I wanted to 2 1/2 years ago. Now I am climbing to 160. I have a Mexico trip coming up in 64 days and I turn 40 in 4 months. I want to get skinny again. I need some help. I love reading things from all my friends on here so more friends the better. But any suggesstions to help me get out of this funk?
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Replies

  • sarahsummers12
    sarahsummers12 Posts: 128 Member
    It is hard... I have been on here on and off for nearly a year.... and I lost 5kg and have put it back on and can't seem to get anywhere either. I know how frustrating it is. I desperately want to get skinny again too. I try and eat well - but even though I've been counting calories and eating good food I still aren't dropping weight and I get really down on myself... I find it almost impossible to motivate myself to exercise... which I am sure doesn't help. So I don't know how much help I can be to you... but I certainly understand where you are coming from. Feel free to add me as a friend and we can try and motivate each other. :-)
  • I turned 40 back in June and weighed 174.8 at that time, so I totally understand.

    My first question is this: what are you doing in regards to exercising?

    Second question: are you following a nutrition plan (notice I didn't say DIET)?

    Erica

    PS Feel free to add me for all kinds of motivation and inspiration.
  • Southernsass6885
    Southernsass6885 Posts: 100 Member
    Okay so THIS is acually going to take tme. It's supposed to. It's going to be hard. It's also going to be SO worth it. If you try to do itall at once, you are sure to fail. Take baby steps. Add a little at a time. Nobody gets healthy overnight. Focusing on the hardships of ths, and how long it's taking, and what progress you haven't made in a VERY SHORT period of time is the fastest way to make yourself quit.

    And if you quit today, you're gonna look back at yourself three months from now, but you will have missed the opportunity to be 10-15 pounds lighter.
  • Yes, its not a diet, its a lifestyle.

    If you want to change, to get skinny again, you have to change the way you live. It THEN becomes routine and only then will you workout all the time without even thinking about it.

    Your nutrition must also develop into a new era. Im talking no unhealthy snacks to no proccessed foods. Take it as far as you want its your choice.

    Remember though, if you really want it, you will change. Change the way you eat, live, workout. Im not saying you will be bothered working out every time, but it becomes routine and 9 times out of 10 if you just do a little bit you end up pushing and doing the full thing.

    I always tell myself, that cake/snack/burger whatever is not as good as the feeling I get when I go home and look in the mirror knowing that the change is happening because i stuck to my plan.
  • Okay so THIS is acually going to take tme. It's supposed to. It's going to be hard. It's also going to be SO worth it. If you try to do itall at once, you are sure to fail. Take baby steps. Add a little at a time. Nobody gets healthy overnight. Focusing on the hardships of ths, and how long it's taking, and what progress you haven't made in a VERY SHORT period of time is the fastest way to make yourself quit.

    And if you quit today, you're gonna look back at yourself three months from now, but you will have missed the opportunity to be 10-15 pounds lighter.

    this too^
  • waronmyfat
    waronmyfat Posts: 322 Member
    i'll be honest.. you have to want it bad enough, you have to desire it enough to eat healthy and cut out all bad foods and exercise and stick with it and you need to be motivated to do it otherwise your not going to succeed ... you can give all the excuses oh i'll start tomorrow stop making excuses and just do it! it's not easy but if you really really want it you will do it :) by saying I just want to give up you've already failed before you've even started and your attitude stinks !
  • ToughTulip
    ToughTulip Posts: 1,118 Member
    Why do you want to give up?

    Where will that get you?
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,854 Member
    It's amazing how so much of this is mental isn't it? I went years and years unable to motivate myself to do anything and then last November, it was like I flipped a switch in my brain. Listen to the people who tell you this takes time. Trying to make it go faster actually makes things go slower.
  • loretta5ue
    loretta5ue Posts: 16 Member
    I looked at your profile and saw that you said you used to run and that you want to run. (I think you said you want to run a 25k).

    So I have 1 question for you. Why aren't you running?

    I'm a runner. I don't win any races. Sometimes I don't even like it but I always make sure I sign up for my next race. Knowing how bad I would feel with a DNF (did not finish) at a race is motivation to train for that next race.

    If you're physically able why not give it a try? The only thing you have to lose is the registration fee.
  • foleyshirley
    foleyshirley Posts: 1,043 Member
    Hello, I have been on and off MFP for over a year now. I have logged in everyday for almost 70 days. I have for the most part tracked my foods for the last 2 weeks. But I just can't do this. I don't know how people are losing weight. I don't know how to motivate myself to eat healthy or exercise. I use to be 114lbs and was able to eat what ever I wanted to 2 1/2 years ago. Now I am climbing to 160. I have a Mexico trip coming up in 64 days and I turn 40 in 4 months. I want to get skinny again. I need some help. I love reading things from all my friends on here so more friends the better. But any suggesstions to help me get out of this funk?

    I was always thin up until my mid 30s. I started gaining weight at 36 or so, and did it slowly over several years. I turned 48 in june, and weighed 189.4. I finally decided something had to give.

    Do it now. Don't wait. It will never be easy, but it has been rewarding. I promised myself I would make major changes before 50. You won't regret starting!
  • MorganLeighRN
    MorganLeighRN Posts: 411 Member
    It takes time. The weight doesn't just magically fall off like so many people would like it too. Looking at your profile it says that you used to run. Why not start up again? Eat healthy and start exercising again. Did you run the 25K?
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    working out/eating healthy is not easy....it is freaking hard work!

    What does your current work out regiment look like? How are you structuring your meals and how many calories per day are you taking in?
  • Hi - I can sympathise. I've been doing this for about 3 months and am making only incremental progress.I've seriously lost motivation the last week or so and don't seem to have any energy for exercise (or I choose not to make time). But I'm sure I'll get enthused again, and that you will too. Keeping a record of what you eat is great for keeping vege intake up (pride) and crap foods down (shame). I need new pals to keep me on track so friend me if you think I can help.
  • gabriellejayde
    gabriellejayde Posts: 607 Member
    open your diary so we can see your food. You may only have to make simple changes.
  • chelsea27lynn
    chelsea27lynn Posts: 6 Member
    I am at your point too! I am in a competition and I've hit 5lbs but couldn't get past that. Yesterday I steped on the scale and was really disappointed with myself. I started to have a nice chocolate breakfast but then told myself no. I put on my work out clothes and decided to walk until I thought I should turn around. I ended up walking 7.58miles! Keep telling yourself that you know you can do it! You have a goal and you know what you want! ANYTHING YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH! Best of luck! :)
  • ashlbubba
    ashlbubba Posts: 224 Member
    I am at your point too! I am in a competition and I've hit 5lbs but couldn't get past that. Yesterday I steped on the scale and was really disappointed with myself. I started to have a nice chocolate breakfast but then told myself no. I put on my work out clothes and decided to walk until I thought I should turn around. I ended up walking 7.58miles! Keep telling yourself that you know you can do it! You have a goal and you know what you want! ANYTHING YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH! Best of luck! :)

    AWESOME job Chelsea!!! Very motivation-- keep up that drive girl! We can do this!!
  • AmyBoogie
    AmyBoogie Posts: 91 Member
    This has been me for the past 5 years or so. I managed to maintain my weight but not lose anything. I could tell you that I was relatively good and I was but in reality I know I didn't put in the effort needed to take it off.

    As you get older it gets harder and you have to put in more effort. For me, looking back to the days where I was 110 and eating a full large pizza for a dinner (by myself) is self defeating. Those days are just gone. My body and life are different so I need to be smarter.

    What I was doing wrong (because I have no idea why you can't lose the weight) - "taste testing" yeah, testing was probably a little too much testing. I would eat something and if I didn't log it immediately it didn't go in and I forgot about it. I had a written food log and I would forget it places so now I'm online hoping that means I'll never forget to log in. What I was thinking was sensible was good food but maybe the wrong portion. I have to measure because I'm wrong wrong wrong otherwise.

    I don't know if any of this helps you but if you really want this, hang in there and lean on the group. Learn from those here. You can do it if you set your mind to it.
  • Lesa_Sass
    Lesa_Sass Posts: 2,213 Member
    Wow, we have a lot in common. I used to be able to eat anything as well and stay teeny tiny. I am also going to Mexico in November.

    I started this journey in 2007. I totally agree with the baby steps theory to changing the lifestyle I stopped eating meats high in saturated fats (bacon and high fat hamburger) then I stopped drinking alcohol, then I stopped drinking soda and so on. I started eating more side salads instead of french fries and would choose a fruit parfait with yogurt instead of icecream for desserts. I did this ONE thing at a time and went to the next thing after I got used to the last thing.

    I am 44 years old and now I am pretty much to the point where I can eat anything I want again. I will say that what I want is typically healthier but yeah, there are days that I will choose a fattening sweet treat,, it is okay because 90% of my diet is darn good.

    One of the worst things you can do is putting too much pressure on yourself to do it all at once and now. Just start by making one change, then take it from there.

    Good luck, hang in there. You will never regret getting healthy, I promise you that. Looking pretty is just a benefit.
  • I was going to ask about exercise as well

    If you give up what will happen, gain???
  • Rbi827
    Rbi827 Posts: 2 Member
    Hello...

    It seems to me that we can never give up longing and wishing for all that we want in life. Sorry, I don't have the easy answer, but I want to say certain things I feel are beautiful rewards and well worth the good effort that we put into them....You MUST continue to hunger after them. Stay true to the plan, and look up "The belly fat cure" to understand how sugars may be holding you back. Best of luck!!!
  • Don't ever give up! Just be patient and persistent, and the results will come!
  • i am also in this boat , thinking of giving up . i know i wont ever get back to where i want to be . i just turned the big 5 0 this june and am finding it harder and harder to come off . i take group exercise classes and really love them cuz all of the ladies (and gents) in there are all in the same boat too...but it does help to make friends and make you want to come to class so you can see them . i always lose this motivation during the summer but im trying to get b ack on track now that summer is over . i use to be down to 128 in my 40's and now im up to 170's and i absolutely hate it !!!! you're not alone in this , hang in there . we have to remember, like others have said , do it now cuz it does get harder as you get older.....50 and still working at it !
  • WOW! well said....
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    Wow, we have a lot in common. I used to be able to eat anything as well and stay teeny tiny. I am also going to Mexico in November.

    I started this journey in 2007. I totally agree with the baby steps theory to changing the lifestyle I stopped eating meats high in saturated fats (bacon and high fat hamburger) then I stopped drinking alcohol, then I stopped drinking soda and so on. I started eating more side salads instead of french fries and would choose a fruit parfait with yogurt instead of icecream for desserts. I did this ONE thing at a time and went to the next thing after I got used to the last thing.

    I am 44 years old and now I am pretty much to the point where I can eat anything I want again. I will say that what I want is typically healthier but yeah, there are days that I will choose a fattening sweet treat,, it is okay because 90% of my diet is darn good.

    One of the worst things you can do is putting too much pressure on yourself to do it all at once and now. Just start by making one change, then take it from there.

    Good luck, hang in there. You will never regret getting healthy, I promise you that. Looking pretty is just a benefit.

    could not agree more. I started in 2006 and I am always re-adjusting and looking for new ways to drop weight/body fat. You are going to have ups and downs but the main part is that you make eating healthy and working out a part of your every day life!
  • caslyn3
    caslyn3 Posts: 70 Member
    patience. don't expect to lose 40-50 lbs overnight.. not happening. If you want it, just do it. Don' think of it as a diet anymore.. think of it as a lifestyle change - Even when you get to your goal weight, and you will with hard work, determination and TIME, You still have to exercise and eat right. Just start by making better choices when you eat. Instead of sweets.. get a banana, put some peanut butter on it. Just got most of your protein and some potassium in for the day. Plan out your meals ahead of time. DRINK WATER!!!!! And most importantly, believe in yourself.

    Good Luck!
  • yowla
    yowla Posts: 127 Member
    I jog. I have done a lot of jogging. I ran a 25k and I run about 2-4 times a week. But nothing helps. 2 weeks ago I was doing really good and last week I gained so much of the weight I lost back and then some. My hubby and I are working on this together. We grill up Chicken and Pork for the week, for lunches. I cut up veggies and fruits. But Nothing. I just don't get it. Well today I totally fell off my diet. I ate like a total pig. Maybe I needed a day like that. :)
  • yowla
    yowla Posts: 127 Member
    I looked at your profile and saw that you said you used to run and that you want to run. (I think you said you want to run a 25k).

    So I have 1 question for you. Why aren't you running?

    I'm a runner. I don't win any races. Sometimes I don't even like it but I always make sure I sign up for my next race. Knowing how bad I would feel with a DNF (did not finish) at a race is motivation to train for that next race.

    If you're physically able why not give it a try? The only thing you have to lose is the registration fee.



    I did run my 25k. I hate running. I mean I love running but I hate it. I hate motivating myself and hate doing it but the love the way I feel afterwards. I have just gained so much extra weight that my knees hurt when I run.
  • anifani4
    anifani4 Posts: 457 Member
    Hi Y. I feel for ya. It is so easy to get discouraged when one sees no results. I think the food tracking is important and you must pay attention to portion size. You just have to invest some time into measuring or weighing everything. When you have an accurate calorie count you'll be able to adjust to a level where you will start losing. I used to not measure stuff and figured I knew enough about sizes of servings to not do it. Hah. I was wrong. When I started measuring I could see that my guesstimates were always higher than the actual amount of a serving. so I was taking in more than I calculated.

    In some sense, weight loss is a science. If you burn more calories than you expend, your body will use fat stores for energy. It takes 3,500 calories to either gain a pound or lose a pound.

    http://www.caloriesperhour.com/tutorial_pound.php


    However, if you go on a low calorie depravation diet, your body will start to conserve energy by slowing down metabolism, then it will take a bigger calorie deficit to lose one pound of fat.

    Here's another fact. your body gets used to an exercise and runs more efficiently, burning fewer calories than it used to with the same exercise. When people hit a plateau a good thing to try is to change your exercise type. If you mostly run, try swimming or biking or aerobic classes/tapes. Anything to move your body in a new way.

    Maybe one of these ideas will help. Hang in there. Ani
  • sharoncasey60
    sharoncasey60 Posts: 60 Member
    I admire you for being honest. I am in the same boat.............read my profile. We can't give up! I question myself too but it is NEVER TOO LATE to improve and get it together. I am 23 years your senior and BELIEVE ME , it only gets much harder. Do what you need to do now or your regrets will pile up. I am at my highest weight and must must must come down. I would love to keep encouraging you. ONE DAY AT A TIME, IF NOT, ONE MEAL AT A TIME. you can do this and I can too!
  • Go1096
    Go1096 Posts: 83 Member
    I feel your pain. It has taken me a good long time to get motivated and stay motivated and from time to time I feel like a hopeless case and think about giving up...but I have been at it now since mid July. I have been doing this for me long enough that I have gotten into the habit of watching what I eat and wanting to exercise even though my scale keeps going up instead of down.

    I don't know what exactly it is but something did just click and I woke up to wanting nothing more than to be fit.
    Until you really really want it, you are going to feel like giving up.

    My suggestion? Do you have old pics of yourself that can motivate you? You have to find that thing that will keep you fighting for what you want. Each night before I go to sleep I visualize myself the way I want to look. EVERY NIGHT. That helps me.
    It also helps to know that I am not just doing this for me but I am setting an example for my daughter.

    Good luck to you! I hope you find your groove and move with it. :)