Not the place for relationship advice but much needed.

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  • linz1125
    linz1125 Posts: 441 Member
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    Reasons he'd be gone if I were you:
    1. His insecurity (leads to jealousy and controlling issues)
    2. Disrespectful
    3. He continued to intentionally embarass you in public.

    Some things are worth overlooking. Not multiple things that you are not comfortable with. Move on, and don't waste any more time on him.
  • leafstucker16
    leafstucker16 Posts: 136 Member
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    Should he continue to do it? No.

    Should you have punched him the first time? No.

    Both of you probably aren't ready for a relationship, both seem to have problems and growing up to do first.
  • peuglow
    peuglow Posts: 684 Member
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    Lose him, I guess.

    On a side note, you both sound like super fun people :/

    - edit - I'm just saying, maybe you both should lighten up a bit. He obviously doesn't respect you. So dump him. But maybe reevaluate what you're looking for in a guy, because this one seems way off the mark.
  • marieautumn
    marieautumn Posts: 932 Member
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    Lose him, I guess.

    On a side note, you both sound like super fun people :/

    - edit - I'm just saying, maybe you both should lighten up a bit. He obviously doesn't respect you. So dump him. But maybe reevaluate what you're looking for in a guy, because this one seems way off the mark.

    this
  • aplusgeek
    aplusgeek Posts: 49
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    This sounds like it was written by a 12 year old. And come on, slapping a butt of someone you're in a relationship with is nothing bad. And you punched him sounds worse than a butt slap.

    You both sound a little, what's the word I'm looking for.... childish.

    And if he thinks he's a loser, than yeah, he's a loser and he will always act to that paradigm. He will be negative and you never want somebody negative in your life as it will bring you down.

    Also on to your point that slapping a girl's butt is disrespectful to women, the only way it would be disrespectful to women is if you were going around slapping random strangers butts. I think you need to liberate your self a little sexually and open your horizons if these are your views of the world.
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,534 Member
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    It's not up to anyone else to determine what you are comfortable with, what is okay as far as touching, or what you consider disrespectful. If you don't like it, you don't like it.

    I agree with many other responses here that there are multiple problems going on here. Grabbing you after you asked him to stop is not acceptable, but neither is punching him. Just from what you wrote, which is all any of us have to go on, it sounds like both of you would do better apart from each other and work on some emotional development before pursuing another relationship.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Also on to your point that slapping a girl's butt is disrespectful to women, the only way it would be disrespectful to women is if you were going around slapping random strangers butts. I think you need to liberate your self a little sexually and open your horizons if these are your views of the world.

    She doesn't like it. She doesn't have to lighten up. It's not a ridiculous request in her eyes. It's something that she believes and she shouldn't have to "liberate herself". This is what's wrong with society right now. That we all need to "lighten up". If you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything.
  • aplusgeek
    aplusgeek Posts: 49
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    Also on to your point that slapping a girl's butt is disrespectful to women, the only way it would be disrespectful to women is if you were going around slapping random strangers butts. I think you need to liberate your self a little sexually and open your horizons if these are your views of the world.

    She doesn't like it. She doesn't have to lighten up. It's not a ridiculous request in her eyes. It's something that she believes and she shouldn't have to "liberate herself". This is what's wrong with society right now. That we all need to "lighten up". If you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything.

    No, what's wrong with society is that people take offense with EVERYTHING. Especially in the U.S., it is not as serious here in Canada and much better in Europe.

    In Europe if you see a girl and say, hi beautiful, she'll smile back and wave. In the U.S. if you see a girl and say, hi beautiful "omg sexual harassment".

    I travel to europe and U.S., and am originally from Canada. So I know how it is in different regions of the world. And I'm not saying that everyone is like that, but the op is, and you are probably as well.
  • 4x4play
    4x4play Posts: 200 Member
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    Hmmm... I don't even know where to begin with this but punching him for slapping your *kitten*?? WOW that is a bit over the top. If you have certain boundaries then you should discuss them. To me it sounds like you all shouldn't even begin a relationship when you get that upset, that you felt the need to punch him.

    I love my *kitten* being slapped because to me it shows he is attracted to me and can't keep his hands off me. I do not feel like a posession when getting it slapped.... I actually will bend over for him so he has a better shot!

    Oh wait a minute.... my mind started drifting.... where were we again?? Next... thread please!
  • HotCuppaJo
    HotCuppaJo Posts: 477 Member
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    I SLAP *kitten* when I'm excited. Let me know when you dump him....he sounds like my kinda feller! ;):drinker:
  • MonicaLee92
    MonicaLee92 Posts: 222
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    You really punched him for slapping your butt? That's a little extreme... I get that people have different boundries and he should respect that but going this far over butt slaps is a little over dramatic. I personally take it as a compliment. To me that means hey! You're lookin good! I see it more of a compliment from a SO...
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Also on to your point that slapping a girl's butt is disrespectful to women, the only way it would be disrespectful to women is if you were going around slapping random strangers butts. I think you need to liberate your self a little sexually and open your horizons if these are your views of the world.

    She doesn't like it. She doesn't have to lighten up. It's not a ridiculous request in her eyes. It's something that she believes and she shouldn't have to "liberate herself". This is what's wrong with society right now. That we all need to "lighten up". If you stand for nothing, you'll fall for anything.

    No, what's wrong with society is that people take offense with EVERYTHING. Especially in the U.S., it is not as serious here in Canada and much better in Europe.

    In Europe if you see a girl and say, hi beautiful, she'll smile back and wave. In the U.S. if you see a girl and say, hi beautiful "omg sexual harassment".

    I travel to europe and U.S., and am originally from Canada. So I know how it is in different regions of the world. And I'm not saying that everyone is like that, but the op is, and you are probably as well.

    Grab a woman's butt in the Middle East. See how far that gets you.
  • aplusgeek
    aplusgeek Posts: 49
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    Grab a woman's butt in the Middle East. See how far that gets you.

    Walk around with your hair uncovered in the middle east and see what it gets you.

    Go for a drive in the middle east as a woman and see what it gets you.

    What's your point???

    Why would you even use the middle east as an example when they have the worst treatment of women in the world? And on top of that in any muslim regime, the rights of women are pretty much non-existent.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
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    Punching a boyfriend because he touched your butt is extremely over the top. 90% of your boyfriends will touch your butt. For future reference, tell your next boyfriend BEFORE he touches you there, instead of hauling off and punching him.
    If you're this quick to anger over this, you need to honestly figure out why, and it's not just "oh, in my parents culture..." I will, say I doubt you will be able to keep a boyfriend will will absolutely never touch your butt and be perfectly happy to never touch you there. If someone punched me in the face like that, they'd be gone. You're lucky he didn't break up with you on the spot.

    His 2nd time, he was being a jerk, and unacceptable.

    If it's a deal break for you, call it what it was. If you bend your "deal breaker" once, you'll do it a dozen more times.

    If a guy says "I'm a loser", he has a big problem with low self-esteem. I don't know how long you've been dating him, but it's NORMAL for couples to reassess their relationship and really need to ponder where things are going. I'd question someone who didn't. Why waste each other's time?

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