"you'd be pretty if you were skinny"

Happens to me a lot.

It's not a compliment.

I've heard it a million times. Or the fat girl favorite for *kitten*: "You have a nice face."

I'd respond with, "I bet you'd be a nice person if you weren't so thick in the head."

In all seriousness, you're going to get it a lot because society says fat=ugly, but because you are a pretty person so, they feel it necessary to distinguish which part of you is attractive.

The people may or may not have meant it to hurt, but is it really so hard to say, "You're pretty." to a big girl without accounting for BMI?

Some lady told me this when I was 16! can you imagine how destroyed I was. Her exact words are burned in my head forever she said "You are so beautiful you could be a model if you just lost some weight" I was 16! she was a grown woman who says that to a kid! I feel for you I really do people need to learn to shut up

such a rude thing to say, i can see why people say take it as a compliment but i sure couldnt..punch the person in the face next time. x

omg!!!! I can't believe someone would have the guts to say that!!. Some people don't think before they talk! No wonder people are so critical of their own physical appearance!
Well forget about it and continue on your plan! Even when you lose your goal weight, there will still be ugly comments cause people can be real jerks!!

You should say to them that you can lose weight but they will always be ugly! Cheeky feckers x

I'm usually all for playing the understanding, not rising to the bait card, but people who say something like this should be betch slapped. Hard.

Don't let who you are or how you feel about yourself be dictated by morons who are too tied into cake-mold beauty to see that it's inappropriate and presumptive to say things like that.

I whole-heartedly agree with the poster who said your response should be "You'd be smart if you weren't so stupid."

No I was never told that but now I have lost weight people say 'you wernt ugly before but now your really pretty'!!

-true beauty lies within

This! I've met some really ugly people who were stunning until they opened their mouths.

As to the OP, people who say things like that are passive aggressive. I know to ignore them is easier said than done, but focus on yourself and your goals and take what they say with a grain of salt. You must be beautiful already if they're bothering to say something in the first place. I hate that we live in a country where one's weight is synonymous with their beauty.

Oh my god first off that woman has some damn nerve saying something like that to you... no one ever has reason to be saying something so freakin rude... You go off of how you feel honey not what others say... do what makes you feel pretty! "skinny" doesnt mean your pretty! Just saying. Brush that crap off and laugh in there face when folks say that rude stuff.

A guy said that to me in a pub once - actually took me aside and gave me a lecture on how I could be so attractive to men if I'd only stop eating cake.

I don't eat cake

It was all I could do not to pour a drink over his head.

Should have done. And then said, "My decision to eat cake never has anything to do with your pen*s"

What a doosh.

It is a backhanded compliment. Very rude & unacceptable. I usually reply with "And you, too, would be quite attractive if you weren't such a jerk."

I'd probably come back with something like, "Maybe, but you'll always be a stupid b*tch."

Or I'd throw an elbow.

Or both.

I would have said "you'd be pretty if you didn't speak". Then I would have hissed at 'em.