"you'd be pretty if you were skinny"

Response should be "You'd be smart if you weren't so stupid."

Oh yeah! You nailed it.

What a horrible thing to say to someone.

All I can say is that I'm thankful for my husband who loved me even when I was obese. He said I was always his pretty wife. He is glad I lost weight because it makes ME happy, but he gets mad if I disparage myself in any way about when I was fat. He always reminds me that I was always his lovely wife. I think I'm lucky to have him.

Our husbands must be related!! Mine is always telling me how beautiful and sexy I am...even more so now that I am losing weight. I know he loves me...cause even at my worst he tells me I'm beautiful!

As for the "complimentors"....I would have come back with "I always thought I was pretty"...hmmm!

ohemgee. story of my life! lol- and it doesn't really matter- i think my face was prettier when i was a fatty anyways! fuk em! this IS an insult! who the fuk? baaah! this is amazing to me---pretty is pretty is pretty, fat or skinny! don't pay em no mind, they are both without manners or social skills! <3n-

part of what kept me so fat for so long was friends who didn't want to hurt my feelings telling me that I wasn't fat, that I was solid, big boned and "still beautiful". It wasn't till I heard the truth from a guy I really liked that I finally got smacked in the face with it.....and was able to get motivated to lose the weight....

and now I AM beautiful, inside and out....

truth is truth.....don't cover it with chocolate to make it taste better.....if you are morbidly obese you WILL be more attractive when you lose the extra weight

don't be a hater

Yea, you will feel better, and more than likely look better when you lose the weight. (except in the rare case where some girls/guys actually DO look prettier with some extra meat) BUT that still does not make it any nicer to say to a total stranger something along the lines of "you're fat" or lose weight to be pretty.

I think friends should be a bit more honest. I won't lie, I honestly prolonged losing weight because of that! I'd say "I'm fat, I need to lose weight" and my friends would all jump in with the "no you're not! You're pretty" blah blah blah. But see, if THEY said I should lose weight, it's ok, because they're my friends. I've known them for a long time and chances are they are saying it for my well being. Not to be snarky. But if a stranger says it, it's mortifying and discouraging. It's almost as bad as the "when are you due?" when you're not pregnant!

Okay..
so this has happened on two different occasions where I was in a public bathroom doing my make up or whatever and a lady has told me.
"you would be beautiful if you were skinny"
......... i always take this as an insult though i'm not sure if it is.

today at work a lady came in and told me-
"if you lost weight you'd look so pretty"

HAS THIS HAPPENED TO ANYONE ELSE? for some reason it makes me feel so sad and ugly... I guess at the same time it's pushing me more to lose weight. I just don't know how to feel about it.

My response would be 'You would be smarter if you didn't open your mouth.'

Never happened to me and I think it's pretty rude... First of all "skinny" doesn't make people beautiful!!! That's the most important thing to realize. It took me a while to get that myself.

But don't get upset about it. If you can use it to your advantage - as motivation or as a thought when you do kickboxing ;-) - then do it. Otherwise, don't think about it anymore.

This is so true. Honestly I would tell those people that what they said is rude. Every single person has to deal with themselves and obviously these people are not by any means beautiful, I do not care what they look like. Skinny is not beautiful A person is beautiful. If you want to lose weight then that is a decision you make. If you don't so be it. People are beautiful and pretty big and small. And that is the real truth. Some people, not all, are very superficial and only see the outside. Obviously I love to look good but if that's all I'm worried about my life would be very unbalanced.
Who gave these people the right to talk to you like that.
You find your beauty within yourself, do not live your life according to anyone else.

Okay..
so this has happened on two different occasions where I was in a public bathroom doing my make up or whatever and a lady has told me.
"you would be beautiful if you were skinny"
......... i always take this as an insult though i'm not sure if it is.

today at work a lady came in and told me-
"if you lost weight you'd look so pretty"

HAS THIS HAPPENED TO ANYONE ELSE? for some reason it makes me feel so sad and ugly... I guess at the same time it's pushing me more to lose weight. I just don't know how to feel about it.

OMG - Yes it is very insulting if you ask me. Somebody told me this at a meeting earlier this year, when I was all dressed up and thought I looked pretty good. It was very upsetting to me. People are stupid sometimes.

Okay..
so this has happened on two different occasions where I was in a public bathroom doing my make up or whatever and a lady has told me.
"you would be beautiful if you were skinny"
......... i always take this as an insult though i'm not sure if it is.

today at work a lady came in and told me-
"if you lost weight you'd look so pretty"

HAS THIS HAPPENED TO ANYONE ELSE? for some reason it makes me feel so sad and ugly... I guess at the same time it's pushing me more to lose weight. I just don't know how to feel about it.

Just reply with, "Do you just tell others, or would you ever dare to practice what you preach?"

One can't win.
I've been told I'd be "pretty if I gained some weight"...and I'm a hard and lean muscley 112lbs. I mean...wtf do they want?

Yep, I've heard this many a time. It depends on the day and my mood whether I take it as an insult or a compliment. I try to be of the mindset that this means I have the potential to be hot and I try to use it as motivation. But it's kind of a stupid back-handed way to compliment someone. It's like saying "Well, you COULD be pretty, but right now you're just fat." It's just a dumb thing to say to someone, even if you don't mean it as an insult. I know that I'll look (and more importantly feel) much better if I lose weight, and I am thankful that I have a decent face. But that doesn't make it OK for complete strangers to say stuff like that. People suck. Try to ignore them at all costs.

YES! Some friends tell me I would be hot if I was fit. I have boobs and a butt, but also a gut :blushing: Ugh! Its motivation for me, but then again it is embarrassing and fustraiting.

I hate that "compliment." Since when was being skinny a requirement for being considered pretty?

AGREE!!

It's a backhanded compliment. I have recieved that my entire life but in a different way. Man, you have a pretty face. Not just that i am pretty but basically narrowing it down to my face. Or i dated a guy who says...i normally don't date chunky or big girls....LIKE WTF? That is not a compliment but people who have never had a weight problem look at it as if it is a compliment. Ignorance is bliss.

when I was sick with an ED women would tell me I'd be pretty if I gained weight..one of my friends and her hubby still say I need to "go eat a cheeseburger"..pisses me off.. I wanna bench press their ignorant *kitten* ..also when I was that thin my boyfriend said he didn't think I was attractive anymore ..made fun of my razor sharp cheekbones