"you'd be pretty if you were skinny"

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Replies

  • SarahCW1979
    SarahCW1979 Posts: 572 Member
    Ive never had such a double edged 'compliment' thankfully.
    Im a bit of a snarky cow so something along the lines of 'And you'd be a lovely person if you weren't such an insensitive TW@T' would probably just fall out of my mouth before I could stop it >.<
  • shadyj26
    shadyj26 Posts: 102 Member
    You don not have to be small to be pretty.
  • Sul3i
    Sul3i Posts: 553 Member
    Although no one said anything like that to me that's not nice at all n I would have thought it an insult... I would have given them the dirtiest look n walked away... however I liked the comeback "you'd look smart if u weren't so stupid". Lol
  • Ginnyesq
    Ginnyesq Posts: 109
    Never underestimate the power of a well timed "Go F*** yourself".
  • mlmedina12
    mlmedina12 Posts: 8
    Response should be "You'd be smart if you weren't so stupid."

    Love it! That's exactly what should be said back to such rude stupid people. A compliment is "you're so pretty" or "you have such a pretty face", NOT you'd be pretty if......
  • Devild0ll
    Devild0ll Posts: 29
    "And you'd be attractive if you weren't such an *kitten*," is my favorite response.
  • hesgro2
    hesgro2 Posts: 88 Member
    A guy said that to me in a pub once - actually took me aside and gave me a lecture on how I could be so attractive to men if I'd only stop eating cake.

    I don't eat cake :angry:

    It was all I could do not to pour a drink over his head.

    I would have poured the drink over his head. Bought another and considered pouring that one over his head as well. :)
  • Molly_Maguire
    Molly_Maguire Posts: 1,103 Member
    Some people can be so retarded. The mean it to be a compliment, but don't realize it it one of the stupidest, cruelest things you can say to someone.

    The next time it happens, I would just retort, "YOU would more attractive if you weren't such an insensitive b*tch!"
  • sz8soon
    sz8soon Posts: 816 Member
    Never underestimate the power of a well timed "Go F*** yourself".

    AMEN
  • 2012asv
    2012asv Posts: 702 Member
    That is a back handed compliment. Better off keeping quiet.

    The commentary I got was from family growing u: you're fat, you're nose is too wide, your lips are too big, your butt is too big, you have ugly feet, your skin is bad, you're too short, etc. I don't know what they were trying to accomplish. I spent several years very depressed about my appearance before I was able to come out of it and realize they were a bunch of Jerks.
  • amytag
    amytag Posts: 206 Member
    YES. My personal favorite is "such a pretty face". Because obviously the rest of me is a disgusting pile of poo. Ha! Whatevs. My inner ***** says "well, I'll lose the weight and be a fox, you'll still be ugly".
  • mlmedina12
    mlmedina12 Posts: 8
    I use to be really thin and had put on a little weight, I ran into my half sister's uncle and he had the nerver to tell me "damn, you've gained weight" I said back "damn, you're f'n ugly". And I was so mad I added "I can lose weight, but you'll always be ugly".
  • Morningstar93
    Morningstar93 Posts: 161
    It is so passive aggressive. Ignore them.. they'd be pretty if they comprehended feelings.
  • Angie789
    Angie789 Posts: 61 Member
    Maybe they think you would look even more beautiful than you do now if you dropped some weight or even prettier? Some people suck at being helpful or giving compliments even though they do try....

    I think a reality check is in order here though. While it may not be fair or universally true, slimmer people in general are deemed to be more desirable in Western societies. That may change over time but that's just the way it is right now.
    Other things that are generally deemed to be more desirable in Western societies: straight teeth & men with hair. Would you think it was acceptable to say to someone, "You'd be good looking if you only fixed your jacked up teeth"? Or, "You'd be a handsome guy if you got hair plugs"? Would you think anyone who said that was trying to be helpful & complimentary? Of course not. It's rude, plain & simple.

    And for anybody who might be reading this - it is NOT motivational to be insulted. I can just see some jacka$$ reading this thread and based on some of these comments thinking, "Oh, so I can say rude things to overweight people! I'm not being a douche, I'm motivating them!'
  • drea85an
    drea85an Posts: 130
    Some random guy in a Starbucks told me I would be gorgeous of I lost some weight. Then asked me out. I told him the equivalent of,apparently I am gorgeous enough without losing weight, and my self esteem isn't that low.
  • kelzy1234
    kelzy1234 Posts: 2
    After losing 40lbs or so my nan said "she's getting a pretty face now... her face never used to look like that" right in front of me. You can be pretty whatever size you are! :/
  • Martina_Who
    Martina_Who Posts: 172 Member
    I'm no good with snappy comebacks, and I find it very difficult to be mean to someone - even when they are rude. However, one thing that works for me is to ask them to clarify and to absolutely refuse to accept their comment.
    "You'd be so pretty if you lost weight"
    "Huh? what do you mean?"
    "I mean, if you lost weight you'd be prettier!"
    "do you mean I'm ugly now?"
    Ummmm.... no, I just think you'd look better if you lost some weight.
    "HA hA! Well, I'd probably look prettier if I were 10 years younger too!"

    Really, this works almost every time I get a rude comment (usually based on how many kids I have) because it totally ruins the moment to have to explain your jab!

    "6 kids??? - You need to invest in a TV for your bedroom!"
    " huh? what do you mean? I already have a tv.
    "ummmm.... I mean you should find something else to do ..... ummmmm... you know, in the bedroom....."
    (me - totally confused look) - " Well - I sleep in there. Of course, the kids like to get in bed with me sometimes and watch tv. Is that what you mean?"

    At this point I have to hold back the laughter because the "rude" person is completely confused. Usually it just ends with "never mind"


    I LOVE this!!!!!!!!!!
  • Rdahl2
    Rdahl2 Posts: 90
    Response should be "You'd be smart if you weren't so stupid."

    ^^^^Heck yeah^^^ That is really rude and insensitive and stupid to say to someone so why not come back with a smart remark. People dont understand how certain things said to a person affects them.
  • johnnys30
    johnnys30 Posts: 64 Member
    I think it is an ill advised attempt at a compliment. It is insulting but I doubt they intend for it to be.
  • valldeperas5
    valldeperas5 Posts: 9 Member
    The world looks at the outside and makes its judgement. So what I would do if that happens again is say...."Wow...if you only knew the real me then you'd know how truly beautiful I am....inside and out!" Remember that Satan says that you are Not as pretty as you could be....God says you are beautifully and wonderfully made!
  • HotMummyMission
    HotMummyMission Posts: 1,723 Member
    A guy said that to me in a pub once - actually took me aside and gave me a lecture on how I could be so attractive to men if I'd only stop eating cake.

    I don't eat cake :angry:

    It was all I could do not to pour a drink over his head.
    . Hahahahha this is hysterical I would of nutted him right is his manhood xxx
  • dorkusmalorkus
    dorkusmalorkus Posts: 61
    id be insulted. ive hacked up a haircut because of that comment too. its rude. if youre losing weight and being healthy then kick *kitten*! youre ****ing beautiful and strong and an inspiration to everyone!! its no ones business to say ' if you did this then itd be better' kinda thing. if you asked, then appropriate. just kick your *kitten* and kill them with kindness.
  • missbabybee
    missbabybee Posts: 64
    My husband - before he became my husband - would say things like that to me. He would tell me how smart I was and what an amazing person I was and then proceed to tell me that I would be the perfect wife...once I lost the weight. Well, after many, many, nights of feeling hurt and ready to give up on the relationship (after all, isn't he supposed to love me as I am??), I finally realized that he just didn't understand because he has never been fat He doesn't know the insecurity and shame that comes with someone discussing your weight.

    People who have never struggled with their weight don't know how many hours a day we agonize over our weight. They don't know what it's like to battle over what to order in a restaurant, trying to calculate how many calories, fat, and carbs are in everything on the menu. They have never walked up and down the cookie or potato chip aisle wanting to get something, but knowing they shouldn't. They have never walked into a meeting and worried about whether or not they would fit in the chairs. They never saw an outfit they loved, but couldn't find it in their size. They don't torment themselves when they forget to order their latte with non-fat milk. They have never spent time agonizing over whether they should get a second helping at Thanksgiving or have dessert. They just simply don't know.

    I'm not defending those who give out compliments with a backhand (thus negating the compliment in my book...). I'm simply saying that you shouldn't pay attention to those remarks because unless they've experienced being heavy (in which case they would NEVER say something like that), they don't understand and they don't know any better. Don't waste any more time analyzing their motives - focus on the people who love and support you, those are the opinions that matter.

    PS
    My husband married me when I was at my heaviest and these days he tells me that he loves me exactly the way I am, whether I lose the weight or not. Funny thing is, now that there is no expectation for me to lose the weight, and no chance that I will fail and disappoint him, I'm actually more motivated to do it!
  • Panthera3630
    Panthera3630 Posts: 2
    A guy said that to me in a pub once - actually took me aside and gave me a lecture on how I could be so attractive to men if I'd only stop eating cake.

    I don't eat cake :angry:

    It was all I could do not to pour a drink over his head.

    I would have poured the drink. You are stunning, just like everyone else on here. Some people are so shallow.
  • hkevans724
    hkevans724 Posts: 241 Member
    You just tell them that you are beautiful at any size. Beauty is internal. It doesn't matter what your outsides look like if you treat people like garbage and say hurtful things. But you obviously already are pretty if they are noticing how pretty you are :)
  • LALOCHA34
    LALOCHA34 Posts: 340 Member
    People crack me up and don't think before they speak. Don't let it get to you. Just do what you are doing and have the last laugh.

    I was once told by a suitor, "You are so pretty, you look like a retired model."

    LOL WHAT?

    Mind you, I was 27 at the time and 40 pounds lighter. I am not sure what the "retired" part meant. Ha ha. I am thinking, give a compliment or don't.
  • HeatherMale0330
    HeatherMale0330 Posts: 21
    -true beauty lies within

    I have to agree with this wholeheartedly. It shouldn't matter whether you're fat or skinny.
  • tabithap07
    tabithap07 Posts: 39 Member
    A guy said that to me in a pub once - actually took me aside and gave me a lecture on how I could be so attractive to men if I'd only stop eating cake.

    I don't eat cake :angry:

    It was all I could do not to pour a drink over his head.

    OMG!!!! i would have probably slapped him! lol
  • whwalker123
    whwalker123 Posts: 21
    I would reply back...."Well I must be lucky. I can fix fat. You can't fix ugly". :):):)
  • diva72girl
    diva72girl Posts: 4
    That is an insult... first off it sounds as tho she just said your were ugly... second I would have just let her have it... if im skinny or big I am still pretty.. Don't let people just say anything to you....

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