Facebook and Relationship Problems!

Why is the judgement being passed on me because of my age? I am new to the "dating" world! I was married for over 11 years. This has nothing to do with immaturity. Avoidence of his immaturity people. Plain and simple. What grown man worries about facebook?

I think the comments on your age came because you chose to deal with the problem by defriending him, which will only fan the flames and escalate the argument.

Agreed - Kind of like, "Fine, ill just delete you" ha!

Where I think I would not even be able to stay in a relationship - or get even that far in one - with someone who was insecure and jealous. I definately need a strong, secure man on my arm. ( which I have, but it wasnt easy for him at first to accept me and ALL that came with it, but he has learned to know me and trust me, as I him )

Maybe try and talk to him - gently, but get the message out there that you will not put up with it, and he needs to learn to deal. Give him a chance, and if it continues, he knows where the door is!

Sounds like you should wait a week until his mentral cycle is over and have a serious talk with him. I'm only 25 and if I ever had a fight over facebook it would be the last fight I had witht that person.

His last relationship had facebook issues.

Un-friending him will fuel the fire and his insecurities.

So he's a little gun shy. Either talk to him about his past hurt and come to a compromise like adults or dump him. If it's a relationship you don't value very much then there is no issue, end it. To me, relationships with actual people are so much more important than those interactions on Facebook and if anything I did or said on FB caused my loved one hurt, then I would stop and it wouldn't be a big deal anymore. But, I wouldn't like anyone telling me what to do with my life and who I can be friends with either, I understand that.

My husband had some questions for me about my FB account, after several mid and high school friends friended me. I gave him my password for I have nothing to hide from him and I don't give a crap one way or another if he feels he needs to check it to feel secure. I also have his, not because I feel I need it to check in on him, but because I KNOW he doesn't hide things from me either.

Being secure in each other in a relationship is one of the MOST important parts.

ya unfriending him definitely not the right decision, now he knows your on there talking to other guys and has no way of even seeing what your chatting about....that will make him way more insecure. You need to take his feelings into consideration...how would you feel if the roles were reversed?

If I behaved like him, which I don't I wouldn't expect him to appreciate my behavior or put up with it. As far as placing myself in his shoes, I have. This isn't even about that. It's about me being unwilling to put up with crap. Standing up for myself. Not allowing someone have control over who and whom I am or am not friends with. P.S. I was not talking with men. Sounds like assumption.

if this were true you would have dropped him.
which do you like more, the attention you get from other men, or your boyfriend...

this is where you will find the all wise answer little grasshopper

Your profile says you're 35 years old. Isn't it about time to start dating grown-ups?

I asked for opinions, not for criticism or ridicule. Those of you who are responding to me with such comments are the immature ones!

You got exactly what you asked for. Opinions. Just because you don't like them doesn't make them wrong. A lot of the "criticism" you received is right on the head. Just like now, you're being a child. "You didn't tell me what I wanted to hear! I don't like you!"

best meme ever!!

How on earth did un-friending him seem like the best option? Of course that's only going to fuel his insecurities!

I think you are mistaken. He is constantly checking in on me because of his jealousy and insecurity issues.

i'm with you on this! removing him as a friend was a good idea. if he can't control his own personal paranoia, and imposes it on his partner, then it's not a healthy relationship. i did the same thing to my ex. first, i put him on limited profile, so he couldn't see much of anything. when he continued to nag me about every minute detail, i unfriended him. unfortunately, his obsession with a tool to "keep tabs" on me whenever he WAS NOT around was the final nail in the end of the relationship.

insecurity is a problem that isn't solved in a matter of weeks. if you wanna put up with that, i honestly don't think the situation will look up. it's time to cut losses and move forward. do you, and let him do him. there's nothing you can do to help him.

I asked for opinions, not for criticism or ridicule. Those of you who are responding to me with such comments are the immature ones!

You got exactly what you asked for. Opinions. Just because you don't like them doesn't make them wrong. A lot of the "criticism" you received is right on the head. Just like now, you're being a child. "You didn't tell me what I wanted to hear! I don't like you!"

sorry to say, but Corn is right... just because its not what you wanted to hear doesn't make it an invalid opinion. It is still an opinion, as you requested. They were being honest, not immature.

This is sooo off topic from diet, but has anyone else had relationship issues because of facebook? I have an insecure boyfriend who is always making comments about men liking my pics and he is continually questioning me about who messages me and has mentioned looking at the messages. We end up in an argument every time. So, last night I unfriended him and now he's pissed, lol. I handled this situation in the way that I thought would be best. Opinions?

Against what a lot of people seem to be saying, I'm totally with you on the unfriending thing. If only for a short term thing.

I can't say to break up with him because it would be a bit of an extreme response based purely off of the fact of him getting angsty about facebook likes. However, I think it's something you need to address with him. Deleting him off facebook removes his temptation to stalk you but doesn't fix the issue.

How on earth did un-friending him seem like the best option? Of course that's only going to fuel his insecurities!

I think you are mistaken. He is constantly checking in on me because of his jealousy and insecurity issues.

i'm with you on this! removing him as a friend was a good idea. if he can't control his own personal paranoia, and imposes it on his partner, then it's not a healthy relationship. i did the same thing to my ex. first, i put him on limited profile, so he couldn't see much of anything. when he continued to nag me about every minute detail, i unfriended him. unfortunately, his obsession with a tool to "keep tabs" on me whenever he WAS NOT around was the final nail in the end of the relationship.

insecurity is a problem that isn't solved in a matter of weeks. if you wanna put up with that, i honestly don't think the situation will look up. it's time to cut losses and move forward. do you, and let him do him. there's nothing you can do to help him.

OMG...it sounds like he was doing exa«ctly what mine was until I deleted him! It`s reassuring to know that I`m not the only one He checks on my profile so much that it`s like stalking. He know about things prior to me and it`s my facebook. It drives me insane.

I would cut this off now. This is obsessive behaviour. You may (not saying you do, but a lot of girls do, subconsciously) get a kick out of the fact he takes so much interest in you and is willing to exhaust all this energy, but it is not 'cute' or 'out of love'. It can easily get wildly out of hand, especially after you choose to break up with him. I have a saying, 'you never know who a person really is until you break up with them' - basically saying, people do some crazy sht after a breakup. If he's already acting crazy and obsessive, expect it to get much worse for a period of time. The healthiest thing for both of you would be to distance yourself now.

I think everyone already danced all over the fact that it was not the way to handle it to just remove him from your FB, so I won't even mention that part. In any sense, I think it's a sign you're done with this behaviour. Now finish the job and remove him from your life so you don't have to deal with it anymore. Who has time for that sht anyway?

*Edit: Whatever. This post is more for anyone else going through a stalkerish-BF/GF situation. OP is ridiculous. She deactivated, by the way. Have a great day and don't put up with BS from other people, you're not doing yourself or them any favours. :flowerforyou:

haha She'll be back.