Facebook and Relationship Problems!

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  • islandnutshel
    islandnutshel Posts: 1,143 Member
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    quit facebook.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Why is the judgement being passed on me because of my age? I am new to the "dating" world! I was married for over 11 years. This has nothing to do with immaturity. Avoidence of his immaturity people. Plain and simple. What grown man worries about facebook?

    I think the comments on your age came because you chose to deal with the problem by defriending him, which will only fan the flames and escalate the argument.

    You're acting like a child. You essentially are telling him you don't care about his feelings or his thoughts, you're going to do what you want to do and him -- be damned. That's not fair to him. You're dragging him along. He may be a psycho, but you shouldn't drag him around either. You're not doing either one of you any favors.
  • Hendrix7
    Hendrix7 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    Why is the judgement being passed on me because of my age? I am new to the "dating" world! I was married for over 11 years. This has nothing to do with immaturity. Avoidence of his immaturity people. Plain and simple. What grown man worries about facebook?

    What grown woman settles a relationship issue by deleting her partner from her facebook friends list?

    Starting to think this is a troll thread TBH.
  • Jennloella
    Jennloella Posts: 2,286 Member
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    personally I think if something you are doing seriously bothers your SO, whether you agree or not it's time to put on your big girl panties and decide what's more important to you - and I guess you did that, no wonder he's pissed.
  • HauteP1nk
    HauteP1nk Posts: 2,139 Member
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    Those who can't trust others can't trust themselves...or so I have heard.
    And it all sounds like childish games to me.

    If you deleted him off FB then you should delete him out of your life. You've chosen these random guys on your FB friend's list over your boyfriend...that action speaks louder than words.
  • TerraGirl17
    TerraGirl17 Posts: 275 Member
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    ya unfriending him definitely not the right decision, now he knows your on there talking to other guys and has no way of even seeing what your chatting about....that will make him way more insecure. You need to take his feelings into consideration...how would you feel if the roles were reversed?

    ^^^ this and in my opinion facebook is more of a problem for most people then anything.
  • 123nikki123
    123nikki123 Posts: 527
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    How on earth did un-friending him seem like the best option? Of course that's only going to fuel his insecurities!

    I think you are mistaken. He is constantly checking in on me because of his jealousy and insecurity issues.

    Then you and he need to sit down and have a serious face-to-face conversation about your relationship, your concerns, his concerns, etc. Maybe consider couples counseling, if this is a long-term relationship. Not play emotional games on an online social media site.

    That's great advice. He has tried to be controlling.

    I don't know either of you or your relationship situation, but I've been in a relationship with someone who was very insecure and jealous. It's not healthy and it can sometimes escalate to aggressive or controlling behavior. Please use common sense and get out of the relationship if it goes in that direction.
  • Nerdy_Rose
    Nerdy_Rose Posts: 1,277 Member
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    If Facebook is affecting your personal life, you need to take a good, long, hard look at your choice of friends and significant others.
  • 123nikki123
    123nikki123 Posts: 527
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    Why is the judgement being passed on me because of my age? I am new to the "dating" world! I was married for over 11 years. This has nothing to do with immaturity. Avoidence of his immaturity people. Plain and simple. What grown man worries about facebook?

    What grown woman settles a relationship issue by deleting her partner from her facebook friends list?

    Starting to think this is a troll thread TBH.

    When you put it that way...
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    If Facebook is affecting your personal life, you need to take a good, long, hard look at your choice of friends and significant others.

    Exactly. I've been on FB for years and years and have had no real drama from it. A few "friends" showed their rear ends and I deleted them and that was the end of it. It hasn't affected any important relationships.
  • JennaM222
    JennaM222 Posts: 1,996 Member
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    Why is the judgement being passed on me because of my age? I am new to the "dating" world! I was married for over 11 years. This has nothing to do with immaturity. Avoidence of his immaturity people. Plain and simple. What grown man worries about facebook?

    I think the comments on your age came because you chose to deal with the problem by defriending him, which will only fan the flames and escalate the argument.

    Agreed - Kind of like, "Fine, ill just delete you" ha!

    Where I think I would not even be able to stay in a relationship - or get even that far in one - with someone who was insecure and jealous. I definately need a strong, secure man on my arm. ( which I have, but it wasnt easy for him at first to accept me and ALL that came with it, but he has learned to know me and trust me, as I him )

    Maybe try and talk to him - gently, but get the message out there that you will not put up with it, and he needs to learn to deal. Give him a chance, and if it continues, he knows where the door is!
  • KJoy7
    KJoy7 Posts: 246
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    I love when people use Facebook to get back at their spouse, it's a joke.

    Drama, drama, drama. OMG.

    Hahaha! It's not about getting back at anyone. There is no vindictivenss, I simply want to avoid the endless amounts of questioning.

    haha.. I agree... If your boyfriend means so much why didn't delete your facebook account? It's not real life.... it sooo fake. But honey, your boyfriend is real. Sorry just the truth... best of luck.... and Yes, I have ended a relationship due to facebook...it's sad.
  • moosegt35
    moosegt35 Posts: 1,296 Member
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    Sounds like you should wait a week until his mentral cycle is over and have a serious talk with him. I'm only 25 and if I ever had a fight over facebook it would be the last fight I had witht that person.
  • HisPathDaily
    HisPathDaily Posts: 672 Member
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  • dygitalgirl
    dygitalgirl Posts: 20 Member
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    His last relationship had facebook issues.

    Un-friending him will fuel the fire and his insecurities.

    So he's a little gun shy. Either talk to him about his past hurt and come to a compromise like adults or dump him. If it's a relationship you don't value very much then there is no issue, end it. To me, relationships with actual people are so much more important than those interactions on Facebook and if anything I did or said on FB caused my loved one hurt, then I would stop and it wouldn't be a big deal anymore. But, I wouldn't like anyone telling me what to do with my life and who I can be friends with either, I understand that.

    My husband had some questions for me about my FB account, after several mid and high school friends friended me. I gave him my password for I have nothing to hide from him and I don't give a crap one way or another if he feels he needs to check it to feel secure. I also have his, not because I feel I need it to check in on him, but because I KNOW he doesn't hide things from me either.

    Being secure in each other in a relationship is one of the MOST important parts.
  • sizzle92
    sizzle92 Posts: 1,015 Member
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    Break up and be glad he is simply a boyfriend and move on.
  • tismyhardbody
    tismyhardbody Posts: 100 Member
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    ya unfriending him definitely not the right decision, now he knows your on there talking to other guys and has no way of even seeing what your chatting about....that will make him way more insecure. You need to take his feelings into consideration...how would you feel if the roles were reversed?
    If I behaved like him, which I don't I wouldn't expect him to appreciate my behavior or put up with it. As far as placing myself in his shoes, I have. This isn't even about that. It's about me being unwilling to put up with crap. Standing up for myself. Not allowing someone have control over who and whom I am or am not friends with. P.S. I was not talking with men. Sounds like assumption.


    if this were true you would have dropped him.
    which do you like more, the attention you get from other men, or your boyfriend...

    this is where you will find the all wise answer little grasshopper
  • GeekyNerd
    GeekyNerd Posts: 4 Member
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    Why is the judgement being passed on me because of my age? I am new to the "dating" world! I was married for over 11 years. This has nothing to do with immaturity. Avoidence of his immaturity people. Plain and simple. What grown man worries about facebook?

    What grown woman settles a relationship issue by deleting her partner from her facebook friends list?

    Starting to think this is a troll thread TBH.


    Don't feed the troll.
  • zaph0d
    zaph0d Posts: 1,172 Member
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    Your profile says you're 35 years old. Isn't it about time to start dating grown-ups?
  • HisPathDaily
    HisPathDaily Posts: 672 Member
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