family doesnt support me is it worth it?
ninabaz
Posts: 75 Member
I feel ashamed when I work out to the point of not doing it if someone is in the house. I am 100+ over weight and I know I need to loose it but it's hard when I am the only one doing it. And I get looked at like there is a giant cow having a seizer in the house when im working out. So tired of going it alone. In only 15 days in and ready to quit.
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Stop caring what they all think. When they see that you're getting results, maybe they'll be more supportive0
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When you take control of your life you have to shut the negative out. When your family sees your serious and committed then they should come around. Don't give up!! Do this for you!0
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dont worry about them!
just do you,do what makes you happy!
& dont let them sabotage it for you!0 -
Why do you care what they think? You can exercise outside or at a gym if it bothers you that much.0
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sweety...pay no mind to them! This journey is for you and about you. It will always be you vs. you. Many will ask you why you do it, but eventually they will ask you how you did it! Be the example you want to set! Don't quit!0
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Keep at it and laugh all the way to your ideal weight. Then you get to mock them.0
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YOU CAN NOT QUIT!!
If no one else in your house wants to work out, then what about close friends? Or get OUT of the house! Put your headphones in and go for a quick walk
Maybe a gym membership?
And anyone who would think rudely of you for wanting to change your life is an idiot and inconsiderate, please dont let them bother you. Most likely someone in your house also could get more in shape, so maybe if they see how dedicated you are and be motivated!
You won't lose it all in 15 days, just take things slowly and youll see results :flowerforyou:0 -
The real question hun is are YOU worth it? Ponder this for a minute....
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..... Minutes up.....
Answer: You're DAMN right you are! It's not just about a jean/dress size, or vanity...it's also about your health! Think of it that way. I'm not sure of your age...but think about living a healthy future. If you have kids, think about setting a good example for them...if you don't have then...think about gettin fit and healthy for when/ if you want to have them. If you don't then think about it as setting a great example of living a long healthy fulfilled life minus health problems as an example for your family to see. I've dealt with this myself. And it sucks when you have no support, but Here...you will find tons of it. And you have to do this for you...not others.0 -
revenge. will the come around? maybe? maybe not! who cares? use it. work out harder when they mock you. when the weight starts coming off.. and they say something.. smirk.. smile and nod.. when they REALLY start noticing it.. just smile.. in the back of your head, call them f**kers and keep smiling.. then, when all of a sudden they wanna act like they had a part in it, leave those ba*t*rds in the wind with a fart!!
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I was the same way at first, I was worried what they would think or say! I would turn the DVD player off in the middle of a workout if my better half pulled in the driveway! I've done that since I started working out. Until recently I just don't care anymore! I'm not doing this for anybody but me! So he can go ahead and make comments all he wants (he doesn't anymore) and I don't care! Just remember your doing this for YOU! Who cares it's better than not being happy with yourself!! Keep going! U can do this!0
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Of course it's worth it. YOU are worth it!! Let them know that you want to be healthy and that it will make you happy. Let them know also that you would really appreciate their support, but if they can't manage to be at least supportive, to not be negative about it. ((HUGS)) and good luck!! Friend me here, I will be supportive!0
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It deffiently is worth it. I know how you feel, some fam\ily members of mine arent supportive as well But i get threw. I jsut ignore them as hard as it is its possable. If you need motivation You have people here, thats what were all here for. To help each other out 0
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Can I ask are they overweight as well maybe they are worried if you lose weight that they will feel guilty about there own weight and food choices ect, Mine were a bit like that as well when I lived there my mum seen me wanting to lose weight as a insult to her and her food she was very skinny herself but was the kind of person who used food to make others happy and had feed me on a diet of coke chips and chocolate since i was really young so i think it made her feel guilty and I think it confronted her with what my childhood diet had done to me
maybe there is some of that guilt there in your family?0 -
First of all, before I even get into any explaining: YES. It's worth it. YOU are worth it.
I know that it's hard, but to quote a movie character: "The hard is what makes it great. If it was easy, everyone would do it."
You know that you can do this, and that's why you got started here. It does get discouraging to not have support, but you're doing this for yourself. To be healthier, to feel better.
Keep doing what's best for you!0 -
You darn right it is worht it! You know why.....because YOU are worth it!!! Good for you to want to be healthy. Most times when others disapprove, it is about their hangups, not yours. If not now, when? Throw off the shame that binds you. And you know what...this will pass. They will either get on board with you, or not. Whenever we do something good for ourselves, there will be those who support us, those who don't, and those who try and sabatoge us. And that goes for family too. Love yourself, be your best friend, and in the process, you will influence your kids and your wife, and others who care about you.0
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You can waste your life doing things that others (or yourself) may make you feel guilty about. Do they thank you in the end? Of course not! You need to do what's in your best interest and ignore those guilty feelings... either real or perceived. Do what you know is best for you, and those around you will respect you more.0
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Can you set up a spot in another room and tell them during your workout time not to disturb you. This is what i do when everyone is home. I set my laundry room up with a mini tv/dvd player and a step and weights i shut the door and workout. I also go for walks . Walking does alot more good then people realize. Whatever you do dont give up. When you start getting results you will feel so good about yourself and they will be proud of you too0
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Good workout song -- Jimmy Eat World "The Middle"
"Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on
Just try your best, try everything you can
And don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away
It just takes some time
Little girl you're in the middle of the ride
Everything, everything will be just fine
Everything, everything will be alright, alright"
Tune in to some good music and tune them OUT.0 -
Your family may not find your efforts worthwhile - but are they worthwhile to YOU? That's the real question.0
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Are you doing this for them or are you doing this for you?0
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You can do it! Think of all the great health benefits that it will have for you! Losing weight is going to let you live a longer life and your family needs you to be around!0
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I will not work out with people in the house either. I have to send everyone upstairs to the main part while I workout in the basement. DVDs get paused too if they come down. It's something you have to overcome. Just try not focus on them and focus on your workout.0
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You go another 15 days and they won't be thinking that. Then you go another 30 days. Imagine if you kept at if for a year, became an inspiration to your family, and everyones health improved by what you started 15 days ago. You are worth it!
What great posts here too! These are from people who know!0 -
My husband and my daughter mocked and dismissed my efforts for about the first month. Once my husband saw I was serious and didn't give a crap what he thinks, and he started seeing the results on my body, he started changing his tune. He went from mocking, to tolerating, to now supporting me. And my daughter tells me how proud she is. I think it freaks families out when you try to change yourself somehow, especially if you are in a huge "caregiver" role. It's like, "Oh no. Mom is taking care of HERSELF for once. OMG, maybe some attention will be taken away from US. And maybe the chips and cookies and nice homecooked meals will STOP! Let's panic." I don't know, that's my psychological analysis of it all. Lol.0
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when one member in a family changes it makes the other members uncomfortable. The status quo will resist but gradually if the changee (you) stays the course your family will realize no matter what they do/say can prevent the change. Acceptance happens, sometimes others change, sometimes others support but YOU can not use that excuse! My family doesn't support me is the negative thinking talking. Hang tough! there are many successes here and so much support cheering you on wanting you to succeed. Just a thought, consider eating closer to your calorie allotment sometimes too few calories and a busy life results in irritability (speaking from experience) Exercise makes one mentally & physically strong. You can do this!:flowerforyou:0
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Is it worth it? Yes! Think of a life where you feel comfortable in your clothes. Think of your future without diabetes and heart disease. Think of how your knees will feel fine in 20 years if you lose the weight now. You can do it. You're losing it for you, not them.0
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Be the example!! Once they see you making progress they will change thei mind about not doing it with you!0
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I used to be very self conscious when I worked out. In the words of the great Dr. Seuss "Those who matter don't mind, and those who mind don't matter." Honestly, You're doing this for you and no one else. I know it's terrible when you catch people staring at you or saying unsupportive things, but keep at it. You'll gain better form in your movements, and your body will start changing. When that happens, the comments and stares will change as well.
"Wow, I really regret doing all of that exercise." Said no one ever. 0 -
If people are around and you don't want to workout in front of them, then just head out the door and go for a walk. Walk a s brisk pace for as long as you can and then go home. Don't worry about what other people think. I felt really self conscious when I started running (particularly when I would wear tight running clothes) I felt like I was subjecting the world to the sight of my not so good looking body jiggling around but I kept at it non the less. Now I'm down about 25 lbs from where I started (right before I found MFP) and while I still have a ways to go, I know that I have nothing to be embarrassed about and if anybody has an issue with how I look, then they can run my 5 to 13+ miles and then tell me about it! :P0
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