Do you get along with your inlaws........

when my fil was meeting our daughter after she was born he wouldn't hold her cuz she wasn't a boy... ..AND he also thought that my husband should have stayed with his first wife.....the one who slept with the brother. cuz when she said " I DO" she followed it with all his guy friends AND his brother. Yeah 26 years of a rotten marriage later..he should have stayed with her. I haven't cheated on him and never will but I can see why she did.

Thankfully, I don't have to see mine. My bf refuses to give his mother our address and won't even give her his cell because of how she acts. He just visits her o his own when he's in town.

No, not at all. I caught my sister in law having a party drinking and taking drugs with a house full of guys while she was being paid to watch my kids. A few weeks later she stole my hubbies car, best thing we ever did was cut her out of our lives. Life is too short to surround yourself with people who make you miserable.

You are absolutely right. There should be no room in anyone's life for toxic people. Regardless of their relation to you.

amen

Not married yet, but my SIL and MIL used to hate me and we had a really rough relationship - finally BF spoke to them about it and everything has been great for the last year or so. I'm really relieved because it was so tense before and really awkward whenever I saw them! Now I feel much more like part of the family and I see myself with DBF longer term.. I am very family oriented so I wouldn't feel comfortable spending my life with someone if I couldn't get along with their family.

No, but you kinda have to right? We are just completely different people...luckily I only see mine once or twice a year...

but I ADORE the rest of his family, aunts, grandparents, siblings- I really do enjoy them. I dont know what went wrong with his mom?

I actually like my in laws. They tend to be louder than my family, but most families are louder than mine, so that's not a big deal. They have bold personalities that can wear me out after a while, but they are fun, intelligent and caring. I don't see them every other week though... maybe once a month? I don't always agree with them, but I do enjoy them. I'm really good at staying out of trouble and not expressing some opinions... like when FIL and MIL are disagreeing over whether or not a rug/lamp/whatever looks good or whether or not so-and-so was called, etc.

I especially stay out of the issues that are tense within their own family. My youngest brother-in-law has a disability and when questions about his future (care, residence, responsibility, or finances) come up, I stay out. Hubby knows my opinions, but his family don't. All opinions of mine on that matter are noted in private as a couple and routed through as hubby's own (as we're very much on the same page).

Sometimes I feel guilty because I find my MIL easier to get along with then my mom, but I'm a daddy's girl through and through, so no guilt on that front. FIL is great and all but he's not my daddy.

Hubby says his family looks forward to his visits because he brings me, rather than because they are excited to see him. LOL. I didn't believe him at first, but it's true. Guess it's because they had all boys so I'm the "only daughter." He's the oldest of their sons as well, so I'm their best shot at grand kids.

Hubby's relationship with my folks was a bit more tense... probably something to do with me being an only child, a daughter, and him being a different religion and a having strong personality. (Let's just say that when my folks met his for the 1st time, they realized he's the quiet one in the family. :P ) But they've grown on each other, especially as they've gotten more and more opportunities to see how much he cares for me and how great of a person he is in general. He and my father actually get along quite well, especially if the subject is me or tech gadgets. Mom, not as much, but then again even she and I sometimes have trouble (we were like cats and dogs when I was younger), so nothing too extraordinary about that. I think they were just worried about him dominating the relationship at first. Now they see the reality is that yes, he takes the lead, but he always checks with me before making big decisions, listens to my requests and concerns, and takes me serious. He doesn't run me over. Rather, we often confer behind the scenes and he drives a pre-negotiated path. His strong personality compliments mine and mine compliments his.

I think my in-laws may have thought I was a bit passive and quiet when we first met. And that's true, especially compared to them. But they are apparently mesmerized by my ability to get my stubborn hubby to do things he doesn't always want to do... and *gasp* the fact that I'm the only person he's every been seen being physically affectionate with in public. I think my MIL about died of a heart attack when she first saw us cuddled up on the sofa; let alone when I get away with playing with his hair. (I'm told getting him to hug grandparents when he was a kid was like pulling teeth... Boy was too independent to want to cuddle, etc.)

My parents and his have similar politics and hobbies, and both are transplants from out of state, but his are from a very big north eastern city and mine are from the middle of nowhere, mid western, small towns--plus they are different religions. All things considered, they get along remarkably well. At the wedding, we let them channel the differences through some friendly games/competition, add in some great food and lots of time to chat, and all was fine.

Holidays are relatively easy because the only holidays we question who to visit are the civic ones like Independence day or Thanksgiving. When we get moved into our 1st house and have kids, those will be easier because, well, I'll just host and that will be the end of that debate. I've already called dibbs. :P

Hubby also really likes my grandparents, especially G-ma. Oddly enough she was the coolest one of all about the faith differences. Hubby and I could both chat with her for hours. Dad adores her too (G-ma is dad's MIL).

Yep. Along with most of his family. :happy:

I love my in-laws so much! Me and my mother-in-law are very much alike both in beliefs and temperament. His family is a little socially awkward but once you get past that it's okay. I love my father-in-law too but more than once he makes nasty fat person comments which is a little rough.

I love my MIL and FIL more than my own mother. They are warm, loving, understanding and wise. They are the best!!!:flowerforyou: