I want to kill and maybe eat a coworker...

...or at least kill him and take his lunch, you know, whichever.
My coworker just brought in McD's chicken nuggets and despite my rather large lunch, the smell is driving me nuts. I've had to catch myself from bashing in his head from behind and gorging myself of chicken-like nugget shaped sauce reciptecles several times now.

My new lifestyle has been pretty easy up until right now...maybe I'll go punch a whale to take my mind off of it and mark something off my bucket list...unless someone else has a better suggestion.
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Replies

  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
    Fastfood makes me hurl, so I can't relate.
  • SageGoddess320
    SageGoddess320 Posts: 2,589 Member
    Maybe he'll let you lick his fingers when he's done.
  • poetictraveller
    poetictraveller Posts: 47 Member
    The chick who sits opposite me comes to work everyday with a massive carb heavy lunch. She heats up her plate and chows down in front of me day after day...the smells coming off the plate are just divine. When she gets up to put her dishes in the kitchen I get a look at her big fat *kitten*...and then I go back to smiling down at my salad...
  • Hm. I see your dilemma. ;)

    Try eating a small piece of dark chocolate. It's way better than McDonald's anyway, sounds so much more "posh", and may take the edge off the junk food craving without a ton of calories... :tongue:
  • justifiable homicide. Go for it.
  • Angie_1991
    Angie_1991 Posts: 447 Member
    do it.....no one is looking......
  • justifiable homicide. Go for it.

    ^this
  • jennaworksout
    jennaworksout Posts: 1,739 Member
    Fastfood makes me hurl, so I can't relate.

    ^^ this
  • Yukongil
    Yukongil Posts: 166 Member
    even before I was diagnosed diabetic and have been watching what I eat, I never really cared for McDonalds, but for some reason those chicken-esque nuggets are like a siren, calling me to crash myself on the rocks of their golden fried goodness.

    Luckily he's done, so I don't have to murder him...yet
  • jennaworksout
    jennaworksout Posts: 1,739 Member
    The chick who sits opposite me comes to work everyday with a massive carb heavy lunch. She heats up her plate and chows down in front of me day after day...the smells coming off the plate are just divine. When she gets up to put her dishes in the kitchen I get a look at her big fat *kitten*...and then I go back to smiling down at my salad...

    LMAO ....hilarious and true
  • LavaDoll
    LavaDoll Posts: 595 Member
    Shhh, shhh...there, there.

    Who hurt you, friend?

    T_T
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    Dip his bits in Honey mustard!
  • itsmyvwbeetle
    itsmyvwbeetle Posts: 272 Member
    Yesterday my co-workers placed a Pizza Hut box full of bread sticks on the empty desk next to mine. The guy who put it there is a competitor in the biggest loser challenge with me that we have going here at work. I think it was a boobie trap!!! Too bad for him, I just inhaled them and didnt touch em! He's lucky I didnt touch him...
  • Jeneba
    Jeneba Posts: 699 Member
    I feel your pain!!! My office had a breakfast spread - in honor of MY birthday - with all KINDS of things that I would never dream of putting into my sacred little body. AND - all this stuff was RIGHT OUTSIDE THE DOOR TO MY OFFICE! GRRRRRR! :angry:

  • Luckily he's done, so I don't have to murder him...yet

    Poor *kitten* doesn't even know his days are numbered....
  • Gmuneyluv2011
    Gmuneyluv2011 Posts: 1 Member
    I feel your pain! If the Italian lady a couple cubes away doesn't hurry up an eat that cannoli I may hurt her! "MMMM this cannoli is great, I can't believe I only brought two." So put the thing in your trap and stop talking about it!!!
  • The chick who sits opposite me comes to work everyday with a massive carb heavy lunch. She heats up her plate and chows down in front of me day after day...the smells coming off the plate are just divine. When she gets up to put her dishes in the kitchen I get a look at her big fat *kitten*...and then I go back to smiling down at my salad...

    I was going to say something against body snarking, but...what's the point? As long as you're polite to the person herself, you're allowed to think whatever you think.

    And to respond to the OP: It is frustrating to smell food that you're not willing to eat. I try to enjoy the smell for it's own sake (easier said than done, I know). Killing your coworker might be satisfying on other levels, though...
  • BSchoberg
    BSchoberg Posts: 712 Member
    justifiable homicide. Go for it.

    ditto^

    My assistant has a bowl that is literally bottomless and is filled with kisses and mini snickers and (right now) candy-corn - a personal weakness from earliest childhood. She has a drawer full of cracker sandwiches (peanut butter, cheese, everything). That stuff I manage to leave alone. But some jerk out in the outer office keeps bringing in meatball subs and pizza and spaghetti - and the smell of that reheating makes me crazy.... and suddenly, all that candy on the next desk looks really good. It's a daily purgatory... *sigh*
  • nturner612
    nturner612 Posts: 710 Member
    lol
  • Now that is just funny ! I work with an office full of men so we have cookies, chips and candy in the kitchen at all times. Of course none of them are over weight!
  • sweetalker
    sweetalker Posts: 43 Member
    Take something healthy and dip it in that non-healthy sauce. One packet of it is not that bad, just skip the fried chicken mystery parts with breading. The sauce is the tasty part, anyway.
  • sarahharmintx
    sarahharmintx Posts: 868 Member
    ...or at least kill him and take his lunch, you know, whichever.
    My coworker just brought in McD's chicken nuggets and despite my rather large lunch, the smell is driving me nuts. I've had to catch myself from bashing in his head from behind and gorging myself of chicken-like nugget shaped sauce reciptecles several times now.

    My new lifestyle has been pretty easy up until right now...maybe I'll go punch a whale to take my mind off of it and mark something off my bucket list...unless someone else has a better suggestion.
    This has to be one of the greatest things Ive read on MFP lately. Yesterday I said Id punch a monkey to be able to get off work at 3pm. I bet we could be great friends. Ive also threatened to punch a duck for some chocolate or kick a donkey in the uterus for a drink.
  • ...or at least kill him and take his lunch, you know, whichever.
    My coworker just brought in McD's chicken nuggets and despite my rather large lunch, the smell is driving me nuts. I've had to catch myself from bashing in his head from behind and gorging myself of chicken-like nugget shaped sauce reciptecles several times now.

    My new lifestyle has been pretty easy up until right now...maybe I'll go punch a whale to take my mind off of it and mark something off my bucket list...unless someone else has a better suggestion.

    hahahahah this made my day :laugh:
  • mandy0688
    mandy0688 Posts: 335 Member
    Will power one of the housekeepers bought some chicken from southren classic and it smelled awesome so i turned around grabbed my protein shake and stayed away from the smell lol.
  • MemphisKitten
    MemphisKitten Posts: 878 Member
    They put pink slime in their chicken nuggets, or maybe they changed it to blue slime now. . . and no, I am not joking!
  • Coworkers meals----
    Breakfast---BIG Breakfast from McDonalds....add whatever....not even sure whats in there...I turn my back.
    Lunch----4 piece white meat from KFC with two sides....not sure what they are
    Afternoon snack....vending machine, chips and candy...with a 20 oz regular coke....

    Thats 8:00 to 4:30......seriously..... Whats for dinner?

    I am so happy my lifestyle is what it is...yes maybe I drink a beer on Friday nights... and just maybe I have a CUP of gumbo on Sunday....but geez Louise....I am trying !

    I don't want to kill her....she is killing herself!
  • jessc4343
    jessc4343 Posts: 214 Member
    ...
    I don't want to kill her....she is killing herself!

    that!
  • Elzecat
    Elzecat Posts: 2,916 Member
    well if you kill and eat him--just make sure you log your exercise and food calories when you're done.

    :laugh:
  • MindyG150
    MindyG150 Posts: 1,296 Member
    I hear ya! Last night I was on a walk and 3 TIMES, I went past our local Fish Pub...what is wrong with me! Find a different route, put a nose plug on, run faster.....