Eating Disorder Recovery

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little_silver_bell
little_silver_bell Posts: 79
in Motivation and Support
Its kind of sad how insensitive people are about eating disorders. I just joined yesterday and have already recieved hate. I am recovering from an eating disorder and my weight loss goal is still low, but higher than it was before. My goal weight before was 62 pounds, now its 80-120. Most people with eating disorders have unrealistic goals or they just dont care what happens to them. Its hard to recover very hard. It takes a while for the person to move away from there unhealthy habits.

Its very understandable if your mad because there are so many young girls on this site that starve themselves, its heartbreaking(doesnt mean be a jackask). I was one of those girls at 13 (not on this site) and at 9 years old I purged for the first time. Im 18 now Ive been recovering for 2 years and havent made alot of progress. Im still trying becuase I believe that I have control not the bad thoughts that used to consume me.

I think everyone should be supportive of the girls and guys that are trying to recover from unhealthy habits. Not hated upon

Dont go around calling a guy disgusting for logging his 4500 calorie binge eating, hes trying to get better.
Dont say youre deleting a girl that is recovering from anorexia because she messes up one day
Dont tell the guy thats recovering from bulimia that hes a failure because he binged and purge

This doesnt mean be pro-eating disorders and encourage them to mess up or fail again. Encourage them to get better or remind them that they can get through this
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Replies

  • bathsheba_c
    bathsheba_c Posts: 1,873 Member
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    I'm glad you're trying to get better. However, I would caution you that it looks like you may be using the website as a tool to enable your disordered habits. The first is that your goal weight is still unhealthy. The second is the level of detail you put into describing your physical goals. Please discuss with your therapist whether it is a good idea for you to be using the site, and if you're not actively in treatment, please seek treatment. Your health is too important. Good luck!
  • fwalz3
    fwalz3 Posts: 31 Member
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    I have never understood why, particularly on this site, that those who undereat are shunned while those who overeat are supported. Aren't we all here because we want to eat healthy and look better? In my opinion, overeating is just as dangerous an eating disorder as undereating and deserves the same kind of support.
  • little_silver_bell
    little_silver_bell Posts: 79
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    Thanks alot :) Yes my therapist does know I'm counting calories again and that I still have body image goals. The deal was they have the password and have the ability to delete it if they feel nessasary. I also have to report binges\purges
  • little_silver_bell
    little_silver_bell Posts: 79
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    Agreed but you shouldn't say good job to a person who eats 3000 calories nor to a person that eats 200. I think it should only apply if you're trying to get better
  • bathsheba_c
    bathsheba_c Posts: 1,873 Member
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    Okay, glad to hear it! And thanks for reminding everyone that some people join MFP in order to manage or help recover from eating disorders. Sometimes people forget and make nasty comments under the assumption that the writer is a typical dieter.
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
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    I have never understood why, particularly on this site, that those who undereat are shunned while those who overeat are supported. Aren't we all here because we want to eat healthy and look better? In my opinion, overeating is just as dangerous an eating disorder as undereating and deserves the same kind of support.

    Well, if an underweight person put that their goal was to become obese, I'd question that too. She's actually at the weight and height that I started at with 5'4" and 140. Putting that her goal is to be 80 pounds is just as shocking as an underweight person who has a goal to be 200 pounds. It just doesn't make any sense. The goal should at least be a healthy one. Falling off the wagon might happen and people shouldn't be mocked for that in any way. Not controlling your eating habits is a different story entirely, but if it's your goal to do it then I'm going to question it. If she had a more reasonable goal within the BMI normal range of 108 and over, then I wouldn't question it.
  • Meg_78
    Meg_78 Posts: 998 Member
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    @ bathsheba_c, I'm not sure how you can describe her goals as unhealthy as it is already a huge step above her earlier goal as mentioned in her OP. It is also not too dissimilar from my goal weigh range (110-120) and I am in fact a gainer so I came form even less.

    I'm not in recovery form anything, but I can't deny, that looking back at my history with food that I didn't have (and still have) ED tendencies, as well as a pretty messed up hyper-drive metabolism.

    Add me if you like, I'm happy to support.
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
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    @ bathsheba_c, I'm not sure how you can describe her goals as unhealthy as it is already a huge step above her earlier goal as mentioned in her OP. It is also not too dissimilar from my goal weigh range (110-120) and I am in fact a gainer so I came form even less.

    I'm not in recovery form anything, but I can't deny, that looking back at my history with food that I didn't have (and still have) ED tendencies, as well as a pretty messed up hyper-drive metabolism.

    Add me if you like, I'm happy to support.

    a goal of 5'4" and 80 pounds which is the lower bound of her targetted range is not healthy. your goal weight range is healthy.
  • emmyelleNYC
    emmyelleNYC Posts: 27 Member
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    Nicely said! Feel free to add me for support! :)
  • jess1992uga
    jess1992uga Posts: 603 Member
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    I too and using this site to recover from an eating disorder. At first to log calories to meet a minimum required by my nutritionist, but that got too ED related for me and my nutritionist moved me to an exchange based system. Honestly I would say find a nutritionist who you can work with who can show you how to use calorie counting in a healthy way or give you an alternative.

    This site reminds me a lot of the world some times. People are going to dislike people who are different, it is just a reality. And people who haven't had eating disorders many times don't understand the painful process eating becomes. They don't understand that it is NOT a choice, but an illness like anything else.

    I think sometimes people lash out because they are just so scared. This is the deadliest psychological disorder to have and people see us using our behaviors and get scared. They just want what is better for us, but their fear gets the best and they lash out.

    I know how scary it is, how alone you can feel sometimes, but recovery is possible. It's not overnight and it's a long journey, but I know people who are fully recovered. I am on the path now, and sure I stumble, sure I get scared when my weight moves in the direction it needs too (I am underweight), but I learn from each slip and try and cope with the emotions.

    Good luck on your journey. Remember no matter what people say you know you best. Just be open with your team and with yourself and you will find the joy, happiness, and life you deserve.
  • little_silver_bell
    little_silver_bell Posts: 79
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    I have never understood why, particularly on this site, that those who undereat are shunned while those who overeat are supported. Aren't we all here because we want to eat healthy and look better? In my opinion, overeating is just as dangerous an eating disorder as undereating and deserves the same kind of support.

    Well, if an underweight person put that their goal was to become obese, I'd question that too. She's actually at the weight and height that I started at with 5'4" and 140. Putting that her goal is to be 80 pounds is just as shocking as an underweight person who has a goal to be 200 pounds. It just doesn't make any sense. The goal should at least be a healthy one. Falling off the wagon might happen and people shouldn't be mocked for that in any way. Not controlling your eating habits is a different story entirely, but if it's your goal to do it then I'm going to question it. If she had a more reasonable goal within the BMI normal range of 108 and over,
    then I wouldn't question it.


    Ignorance is bliss my friend :)
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
    Options
    I have never understood why, particularly on this site, that those who undereat are shunned while those who overeat are supported. Aren't we all here because we want to eat healthy and look better? In my opinion, overeating is just as dangerous an eating disorder as undereating and deserves the same kind of support.

    Well, if an underweight person put that their goal was to become obese, I'd question that too. She's actually at the weight and height that I started at with 5'4" and 140. Putting that her goal is to be 80 pounds is just as shocking as an underweight person who has a goal to be 200 pounds. It just doesn't make any sense. The goal should at least be a healthy one. Falling off the wagon might happen and people shouldn't be mocked for that in any way. Not controlling your eating habits is a different story entirely, but if it's your goal to do it then I'm going to question it. If she had a more reasonable goal within the BMI normal range of 108 and over,
    then I wouldn't question it.


    Ignorance is bliss my friend :)

    you used the quote feature incorrectly, but I'm ignorant to say that 80 pounds is not healthy for a 5'4" woman?
  • mistyblue1963
    mistyblue1963 Posts: 11
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    whatever eating disorder we suffer from..we all need help and support,just don't get it why ppl don't understand and being mean to these young girls really does not help in anyway !!!
  • stargazer008
    stargazer008 Posts: 531
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    I support anyone who wants to go into recovery for an eating disorder. I understand it is tough because there's that voice inside of you telling you not recover. Everyone faces obstacles in recovery. I understand if you have a high calorie day or a very low calorie day like 200 cals because it is part of recovery to fail sometimes and to succeed other times. I wish you well on your recovery. :)
  • Meg_78
    Meg_78 Posts: 998 Member
    Options
    @ bathsheba_c, I'm not sure how you can describe her goals as unhealthy as it is already a huge step above her earlier goal as mentioned in her OP. It is also not too dissimilar from my goal weigh range (110-120) and I am in fact a gainer so I came form even less.

    I'm not in recovery form anything, but I can't deny, that looking back at my history with food that I didn't have (and still have) ED tendencies, as well as a pretty messed up hyper-drive metabolism.

    Add me if you like, I'm happy to support.

    a goal of 5'4" and 80 pounds which is the lower bound of her targetted range is not healthy. your goal weight range is healthy.

    On her page its 100-120. Sorry yes I agree that 80 is not healthy, but all in all, its still healthier than 60.
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
    Options
    @ bathsheba_c, I'm not sure how you can describe her goals as unhealthy as it is already a huge step above her earlier goal as mentioned in her OP. It is also not too dissimilar from my goal weigh range (110-120) and I am in fact a gainer so I came form even less.

    I'm not in recovery form anything, but I can't deny, that looking back at my history with food that I didn't have (and still have) ED tendencies, as well as a pretty messed up hyper-drive metabolism.

    Add me if you like, I'm happy to support.

    a goal of 5'4" and 80 pounds which is the lower bound of her targetted range is not healthy. your goal weight range is healthy.

    On her page its 100-120. Sorry yes I agree that 80 is not healthy, but all in all, its still healthier than 60.

    Apparently she revised her page. Yesterday, it said her goal was 80-120 pounds on her page. That's why I had an issue with it.
  • little_silver_bell
    little_silver_bell Posts: 79
    Options
    80 pounds isn't healthy, I know. I go through a daily battle deciding what I want to eat today or don't to have a goal of 80 or a goal of 120

    I won't make it to the goal of 80 pounds anyway because I would be in the hospital as soon as my weight goes under 100 pounds

    My goal is unrealistic. I keep 100-120 on my profile to remind me to be healthy
  • tracypk
    tracypk Posts: 233 Member
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    I have seen ppl on here that start at 300 lbs and set their goals to be just above a healthy weight to start. I've heard them say that if I can get to onederville I'll be happy. It's the same on the other side of things. Being just above a healthy weight is a start and being just below a healthy weight is a start. We are here to support not judge.
  • buzzcogs
    buzzcogs Posts: 296 Member
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    I couldn't agree with you more. Congratulations on fighting your disorder and recovering from it. I can't imagine how hard it must be. I hope you are getting the support you need at home and through counseling.
    God Bless!
    Its kind of sad how insensitive people are about eating disorders. I just joined yesterday and have already recieved hate. I am recovering from an eating disorder and my weight loss goal is still low, but higher than it was before. My goal weight before was 62 pounds, now its 80-120. Most people with eating disorders have unrealistic goals or they just dont care what happens to them. Its hard to recover very hard. It takes a while for the person to move away from there unhealthy habits.

    Its very understandable if your mad because there are so many young girls on this site that starve themselves, its heartbreaking(doesnt mean be a jackask). I was one of those girls at 13 (not on this site) and at 9 years old I purged for the first time. Im 18 now Ive been recovering for 2 years and havent made alot of progress. Im still trying becuase I believe that I have control not the bad thoughts that used to consume me.

    I think everyone should be supportive of the girls and guys that are trying to recover from unhealthy habits. Not hated upon

    Dont go around calling a guy disgusting for logging his 4500 calorie binge eating, hes trying to get better.
    Dont say youre deleting a girl that is recovering from anorexia because she messes up one day
    Dont tell the guy thats recovering from bulimia that hes a failure because he binged and purge

    This doesnt mean be pro-eating disorders and encourage them to mess up or fail again. Encourage them to get better or remind them that they can get through this
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
    Options
    I have seen ppl on here that start at 300 lbs and set their goals to be just above a healthy weight to start. I've heard them say that if I can get to onederville I'll be happy. It's the same on the other side of things. Being just above a healthy weight is a start and being just below a healthy weight is a start. We are here to support not judge.

    She's already in the healthy weight range at 140 pounds, but was inititally looking to be almost 30 pounds below the healthy weight range at 80 pounds. That's regressing. That's not a start.

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