38lbs down. No one has noticed.

I've learned to be thankful when people don't say things... sometimes it can be worse. I'm down 29 lbs and my work clothes were at the point of just falling off. I bought one new pair of suit pants (heck they are expensive and I'm hoping to drop a couple more sizes), I wear them to work and my delightful coworker says "wow, your clothes are getting tight again, are you gaining back?". She knew I was trying to lose weight and never mentioned the weight loss, but she sure noticed when my clothes "fit" again.

And that is why when I don't hear comments, I just exhale. I also have a couple acquaintences that like to compare and not in nice ways.... I am sooo over hearing "well since you gained weight, save your skinny clothes for me, I'll need them soon". These are not real friends. Real friends SUPPORT you on your journey even if that means saying "Yo friend, I notice you been going to McDonalds EVERYDAY for lunch, what's going on. Do you want to talk about it?" I can appreciate that kind of support. And someone to make me an awesome salad lol.

As for you, you are rocking out! Keep doing what you are doing and remember that you are not only getting smaller but healthier too and that will prove to be more important in the long run. But a couple new outfits NOW to help you really see the loss wouldn't hurt either

It took me 39 lbs before someone noticed, so hey, you're almost there!

Seriously, it is discouraging, but you kind of have to ignore it and push on. I've done the "feeling fatter as I lose weight" thing too - the best I can figure out is that before there was just a blob that was "me" but now I'm actually looking in the mirror and seeing body parts, and they don't look like the body parts in fitness magazines, so ick, look at those wobbly arms or pudgy belly. On the other hand, I can feel the difference when I happen to put my hand on my hip or my leg - the mirror tells me yuck, but I can feel bones & muscle where before I could just feel fat.

Losing weight can do a number on your head. Try to focus on the positives that you do notice - hey, my wedding ring fits again, I can wear these smaller pants I've always liked, I have an excuse to get rid of these bigger pants I always hated (yes I am highly pants-motivated), my butt feels less jiggly, whatever. Go look at some optical illusions and remember that anything you see in the mirror is getting filtered through your brain, which can have some odd ideas about things.

My best friend always tells me to "Put down the bat and quit beating yourself up!". I need to look at where I was to really grasp where I am at today!

I love this comment. More people need to put down their bats!

You need to do this for you! Concentrate on how much better you feel and how much more stamina you have. Don't get discouraged and don't give up

I'm in the same boat as you. Forty pounds down and the only people that have said anything were hubby and close friends who knew that I started on MFP. No one else has even hinted at noticing.

On the positive side, you didn't have to endure the kind of treatment my mom did when she lost 70 or so pounds. One co-worker asked her how she was feeling and if the chemo was effecting her still. :noway: Instead of assuming that she lost weight by choice, her co-workers thought she must have had a terrible disease.

A friend at work went to Weight Watchers and lots of people talked about it with her and each other, but I just didn't know what to say, so I didn't say anything. One day months after she began working on weight loss she was walking down the hall and I noticed how wonderful she looked and said so. She was so pleased that she lit up. I think my tongue finally got "unstuck." The point I"m making, is that many people aren't sure what to say and stay quiet for fear of saying the wrong thing. Don't take it personally. Some are shy, some don't know what to say, and some are caught up in their own drama.

It's not something that's easy for people to bring up.

Also, people who see you every day might not really notice.

Treat yourself to a new outfit and/or haircut!!

You'll look fabulous and more importantly feel fabulous after all the hard work you've done to get where you are. It can help to look in the mirror and see a 'new' you.

A few years ago i lost about 12 kilos (26 pounds). I was still wearing the same clothes but they were a bit loose. I love to scour op shops, so i set out and found several better fitting dresses and other fab things, and got a new hairstyle. I also bought some new bras for better cleavage (not from the op shop LOL). I felt great and looked great, and people commented then. It's like my new confidence gave them permission or something.

I'm looking forward to that feeling again when i knock off another 10 kilos...

I love this thread! everyone is so supportive

I've lost about 30 lb (14 kg - I'm counting in kg), but with my height it means moving from borderline obese to the heavier side of normal weight range. Lots of people have noticed but that's I think more to do with the percentage of weight lost than the grand sum of weight lost. Also, a lot of them didn't say anything until I was a good 15-20 lb lighter; so this is compatible with the experiences of a lot of people here.

As for seeing yourself, I totally understand what you mean! At my heaviest, I didn't see the weight when I looked in the mirror, I especially didn't see it when I looked at myself naked, which is a bit odd, but I suppose everyone's minds are different. When I did see it and hated myself was when buying new clothes or whenever someone took a picture of me. Holy cow, what a cow! Then, when I started losing, at first I was amazed at the changes I was seeing... but for the last 10 lb or so (that's actually my profile pic, about 6-7 lb back), I don't see it in the mirror any more. I see it on the scale and I see it in the clothes sizes but I dont'see it when I look in the mirror. It really freaks me out. I think it may be because I was at the weight of about 10 lb up from where I am now for a very long time and I just got used to thinking of myself AT that weight. But now every time I see a picture of me, I am startled at the tiny person looking back, but then I forget about it again, lol...

So, instead I try to focus on looking at parts of my body rather than the whole. I like the way my arms look now - the bat-wings are totally gone... My tummy isn't washboard-tight but that hasn't been my aim anyways; it is however looking slimmer... I have collarbones, that's nice. I have cheekbones, that's even nicer! My calves are starting to REALLY get there, which is awesome, I hated my calves even more than I hated my arms. I have a crease/wrinkle on my neck where before I lost the weight I had some fat... that's less nice, but look, the fat isn't there any more.

Losing 38 lbs is wonderful. My neighbor lost about 50 and I never noticed because she still wore the same clothes. But when she bought herself a new top and new jeans, wow! Also, there was a big difference in her face when compared to an old driver license picture. Keep going....they'll notice!

Annnnnnd sometimes if people see you every day they don't notice as easily because the change is gradual. People only noticed I was losing weight when I went home on break from college, and my relatives hadn't seen me in like two or three months.

Totally agree - a colleague of mine had lost about 20 ponds but because i saw them every day i never noticed the difference - and when i eventually did i felt too awkward to say anything as it had been so long

Annnnnnd sometimes if people see you every day they don't notice as easily because the change is gradual. People only noticed I was losing weight when I went home on break from college, and my relatives hadn't seen me in like two or three months.

Yep. I've been losing weight pretty steadily for the last year and a half... No one at uni really noticed through all of last year, but when we came back from summer break, suddenly *everyone* was asking me about it, complimenting me, etc. I had been losing at the same rate over the summer, they just hadn't seen me in 5 months.

People that see you daily are less likely to realise.

For me a friend that maybe saw me every week or two commented "I didn't realise how much you'd lost until you were wearing that tight t-shirt".
I have a load of medium t-shirts, but hadn't worn them for a while; I tend to carry my weight fairly well and dress appropriately if I have too much of it.

Finally, have a look at some of the threads where people have been offended by all sorts of things in relation to their weight - no wonder a lot of people may not want to mention it when people can be so easily 'hurt'.

It's taken 69lbs in 8 months before anyone noticed with me & before I got out of the 'fat girl' mentality.