Guys, be honest,....

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  • megalin9
    megalin9 Posts: 771 Member
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    Out to attack the thinner women? I AM a thinner woman. lol
    For 5'3 or 5'4 yes 120 is fine. For 5'8 not as much.
    What I was saying regarding men having no idea, is just a man will look at a woman and always get it wrong. I still get told I look 120 and hover from 10-15 lbs heavier than that right now.

    Really?

    And yes, I have every idea. I coach women and men for comps as well as myself. I know exactly what I'm talking about. Heck, lets all generalise and demean others, way to go!
    I'm not sure who I generalized or demeaned.

    Except perhaps some young fool who did the same for every woman in the world over 120lbs.
    Exactly.

    Every time I get weighed at the doctor's office by nurses who weigh people every day, the assume I'm 20 pounds lighter than I am. Not that I'm complaining. It just proves that you cannot tell by looking.

    Same here. I've had so many people guess my weight at 190lbs, when in reality, I've been closer to 230lbs.
  • running_shoe
    running_shoe Posts: 180 Member
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    I am attracted to healthy people - emotionally, socially, physically. I do not find obese people attractive.
  • megalin9
    megalin9 Posts: 771 Member
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    IRONY OF PEACE BAHAHAHAHA Goal weight 115, says 120lb is underweight

    WOMEN LOGIC, it blows my mind

    Please show me one place where I said 120 is underweight.

    I'll wait.

    You dont deserve my reply,

    Goal weight 115lb
    says 120 is underweight



    sorry but that made me laugh so hard

    for certain heights, yes...what don't you understand about that?
  • metacognition
    metacognition Posts: 626 Member
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    I'm a girl, and I know good looking people of all sizes. To be honest I have seen heavier women who are overweight on the scale and quite attractive. Look at Adele and Christina Hendricks. These are usually the women with flawless skin, shiny hair and an hourglass body fat distribution. I have seen underweight women who are dressed stylishly but not attractive if they are too narrow up and down. It seems to me that it is very nice to have a nipped in waist, and curvy hips as well as bust - so neither extreme is necessarily appealing. If a guy passes over a girl who is genetically blessed because of some extra body fat, then it is his loss!
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    IRONY OF PEACE BAHAHAHAHA Goal weight 115, says 120lb is underweight

    WOMEN LOGIC, it blows my mind

    Please show me one place where I said 120 is underweight.

    I'll wait.

    You dont deserve my reply,

    Goal weight 115lb
    says 120 is underweight



    sorry but that made me laugh so hard

    for certain heights, yes...what don't you understand about that?

    Sweetie, not even worth it. I never said it in the first place. lol
  • OBXbound4me
    OBXbound4me Posts: 245 Member
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    well yeah its a beauty is in the eye of the beholder kind of thing

    id have to see that to believe it

    you're asking the wrong question... we can see a pretty face and think that's attractive (i.e. that she's pretty) even if we're not physically attracted to her body because of her size.

    for example, this woman is very pretty, but she's nearly too big to be voluptuous anymore. don't get me wrong, lots of guys would find her body physically appealing at this weight, but if you add another 50 pounds, that number would go down quite a bit. she'd still be very pretty however.

    famous-plus-sizes-model.jpg

    of course, if she's smart, funny, and alot of fun to be around, it really would add quite alot to her appeal even with another 50 lbs.

    This woman is beautiful!!!! Period. She is curvy and seems confident.

    ^^^^^^ This.

    I have dated what I would consider a normal amount before getting married almost 9 years ago (2nd marriage), and I only really dated 2 women that I would consider a normal size or size that "society" would not consider overweight. They were 5'2 / 130 and 5'7 / 140. The firat one also got up to close to 200 while we dated and were married (1st wife). All the others were between 170 and 260 and were all hot at the time we dated to me. I will admit, I am first drawn to a pretty face and nice chest, but there has to be a good personality right after we meet too. I guess my most hot can be anywhere from a size 8 - 20 depending on how carried and I can certainly like bigger. It is a total package thing, looks, body, personality and confidence along with how they also treat me. I am 6'2 and 320 right now. Hope this helps. We are out there... :)
  • hendinerik
    hendinerik Posts: 287 Member
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    Honestly I have been attracted to and dated many different shapes and sizes --

    and regardless, I guess the real question is why the question?

    What do you do with the answer.

    Love yourself and the process - the rest will follow - just my opinion...

    All of us are constantly (myself included) looking to others for how we should judge ourselves - we are each unique and bring something to the table - you deserve happiness and that's more than a weight or shape or any one thing.

    Have a great day!
  • Love_flowers
    Love_flowers Posts: 365 Member
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    Whenever I see or hear questions like these I always think: Please don't ask questions you don't want the answers to. :bigsmile: :flowerforyou:
  • megalin9
    megalin9 Posts: 771 Member
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    I can't speak for guys but from my experience - I always got a lot more attention at the lower end of the scale.

    Pretty much. Women flat out don't talk to you if you're over 200.

    Aww. Not true. My husband was at least 240/250 when we first met, and not "built". Definitely more on the squishy side. I was literally in awe of him, mainly for just how down-to-earth, approachable, and kind he was. It helped that he was/is a freakin' awesome softball player. I was attracted to his height, masculinity, strength, personality, and his legendary softball status. :)
  • laura_lynn66
    laura_lynn66 Posts: 175
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    I think it all depends on preference. Looks get you there, personality keeps you there.
    There does have to be an attraction, though. I personally prefer tall, husky guys, but I wouldn't pass up dating a thinner person if they had a great personality, and I was still attracted to them. Attraction is based on more than looks.

    Totally, what she said...I prefer tall and bigger guys even thought I'm short...can't help it! However, after the initial interaction, personality goes a long way...I agree, also, with one of the posters that we look for a lot more substanence as we age, versus just initial physical attraction..someone you have a lot in common with and have a lot to talk about and share life experiences.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
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    people are hard wired to be attracted to people with a healthy weight, it's just how it is.
    So explain people who are physically turned on to only extremely obese people, and love them for all time?

    People are hard wired for a number of things, not just in finding a suitable mate. As we all know, wires can go wrong.
    Sometimes it's nature, sometimes it's nurture, even self-inflicted nurture.
    Some guys have low self-esteem and feel these women won't leave them. Most "self-professed" "chubby chasers" I have met are also over weight, out of shape, crappy self-esteem and go after women who they think they have more of a chance with and won't feel the pressure of getting into better shape, and again won't leave. It can also be categorized in the fetish zone which is just an odd placement of a wire. I knew one guy who was pretty trim and an over all great guy who had one helluva b!tchy & controlling wife who was quite over weight. The reason he stayed? Low self esteem and didn't think he could do better.
    On some occasions, there is the factor that charm beats weight out of the ballpark or she can suck chrome off a bumper.
  • agamy4
    agamy4 Posts: 31 Member
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    I have read somewhere that it depends on the waist to hip ratio. Men are innately attracted to women with small waists compared to their hips because it shows a good sign of fertility. They may not realize it, but their attraction is because of their subconscious mind. The curvy female in the picture showed an overweight female, but she was still curvy, with her waist still smaller than her hips. Some women look good with meat on their bones because of their fat distribution meanwhile others do not.
  • elprincipito
    elprincipito Posts: 1,200 Member
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    You never look at an overweight or obese girl and say "damn she's hot. do you?? I've even caught my husband saying how thin women are hot, but never any that are overweight or obese.
    I have. Like 2 months ago! She was on the uni bus and was asian or spanish looking and had extra on some areas ^_^ so what? she still was hot
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
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    Attractive? Yes.
    Hot? No.

    That's why I started this journey, I want to be in the weight range and I supposed to be, and I want a smoking hot girl.
  • BeSophisticate
    BeSophisticate Posts: 132
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    Interesting topic. As an extremely introverted person, I feel awkward talking to men that I don't know really, really well. In fact, I feel awkward even being in the same room. My point is, I'm living proof that confidence DOES matter (contrary to an earlier comment). I was hardly ever noticed even when I was thin and fit. The fact is, extremely quiet people are invisible, and nobody can find you attractive if they don't SEE you.

    Anyway, that's not really what I wanted to say. I wanted to say that I did notice a very slight increase in male attention when I was thin and fit, but it was extremely slight. While I'm heavy, I might have 10 men flirt with me over the course of a year. When I was thin, it might have been 11.

    However, there is a very different quality to the flirting, depending on my relative weight/fitness. When I'm heavy, more of the men who flirt are quality men. When I was thin, nearly all of the men who flirted were scuzz bags looking for a one-night-stand.

    That's not to say that I want to remain heavy, but the attention when I was thin was most definitely of the unwanted variety.
  • jojo52610
    jojo52610 Posts: 692 Member
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    IRONY OF PEACE BAHAHAHAHA Goal weight 115, says 120lb is underweight

    WOMEN LOGIC, it blows my mind

    Please show me one place where I said 120 is underweight.

    I'll wait.

    You dont deserve my reply,

    Goal weight 115lb
    says 120 is underweight



    sorry but that made me laugh so hard

    for certain heights, yes...what don't you understand about that?
    Not not really my Daughter is 5'9" a was a cheerleader with solid muscle - she weighs somewhere around 115 - depends on the person and their body type
  • zachatta
    zachatta Posts: 1,340 Member
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    Anyway, that's not really what I wanted to say. I wanted to say that I did notice a very slight increase in male attention when I was thin and fit, but it was extremely slight. While I'm heavy, I might have 10 men flirt with me over the course of a year. When I was thin, it might have been 11.

    SO you claim that when you were "thin and fit" that more men still approached you?

    Yet you cling so dearly to this "mystical" confidence that did it for you.

    I am sorry, reality check, men like thinner women, deal with it.
  • nonstopper
    nonstopper Posts: 1,108 Member
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    Truth- We all look at women. A fact of males is that we always look at a woman's face before we do her breast or butt. IS all is good then we continue looking her up and down. So if your over weight and attractive we will check the rest of you out if all is well haha.
  • Iron_Maiden
    Iron_Maiden Posts: 326 Member
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    Honestly I have been attracted to and dated many different shapes and sizes --

    and regardless, I guess the real question is why the question?

    What do you do with the answer.

    Love yourself and the process - the rest will follow - just my opinion...

    All of us are constantly (myself included) looking to others for how we should judge ourselves - we are each unique and bring something to the table - you deserve happiness and that's more than a weight or shape or any one thing.

    Have a great day!
    ^^^ LOVE this!!! I work my curves! I love my curves! ...and I know for damn certain others have as well. As I lose weight and become healthier & more fit, I love that too (because I want it for ME) and yes, my confidence grows which I feel makes me more attractive! So - BOO-YAH! :love: :love: :love:
  • Lize11e
    Lize11e Posts: 419
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    Shamelessly tooting my own horn here, I am obese. The guys at work, more than one, think I'm hot as hell and would date me in a heartbeat if I weren't married. BUT if I weren't funny and friendly and congenial with them, I feel that it would be completely different. Same way these same guys probably wouldn't go out with the skinny b!tch in the other office if they had the chance. Personality has a ton to do with it. For someone just seeing me out on the street, I get compliments sometimes but mostly from black guys. They love big women for some reason. Fine with me, makes me feel good no matter who notices!
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