Stay At Home Mom SUPER Discouraged

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MelissaOnPurpose
MelissaOnPurpose Posts: 111 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hey all! I need help...Seriously! I am reaching out, which is super hard to do. I am a SAHM, 35, and about 100 lbs overweight. I am tired of starting ever Monday, etc. I am just tired, period. I say I'm going to do ALL of these things and I may start them but I never ever FINISH them. HELP! Do you struggle with the same things? I want to do these things:

Work on a monthly, weekly, daily plan.
Eat 5-6 small meals/day, every 2-3 hours.
Work out according to my planned schedule.
Schedule things and stick to them!
ETC! :)

If you've been wanting to do this kind of stuff as well, PLEASE let me know and we can talk. We could Skype, Face Time, email, FB msg, msg on here, text one another, talk on the phone, etc. I need accountability the most, I think. I just really wanna do some soul searching and work on goals and I wanna work with someone else on this! Anyone?
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Replies

  • Candysland2013
    Candysland2013 Posts: 46
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    Ur mormethan welcome to add me .. I'm a stay at home mom too
  • crazyellybean
    crazyellybean Posts: 999 Member
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    You can do it!! Start with small goals and work yourself up... you don't want to overwhelm yourself with too many goals at first so that you give up.. if you just say to yourself "If I get 15 minutes in today, than I will be happy" you can work up from there!!


    MFP is a great place to find support and motivation.. whenever your feeling discouraged come back and look at the Success forums!!


    You go it!!
  • xo_Sarah_xo
    xo_Sarah_xo Posts: 308 Member
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    Just don't make things too complicated or strict as the first time you go off the rails a little bit you will feel a sense of failure and spiral even more downward. My advice is to just take it minute by minute, meal by meal, day by day, workout by workout and pound by pound. You WILL get there. it is NOT a sprint - it is a marathon and pacing yourself and picking yourself up after a small mis-step is the key.

    Friend request me if you wish - just know that I have no strict schedules or eating plans but I do have success so far.:smile:
  • Flab2fitfi
    Flab2fitfi Posts: 1,349 Member
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    Hi

    Start by making small changes - try and do just one of these things for the first week and then slowly increase the list.

    Often doing too much to soon can lead to burn out and getting down.

    If you want to fr me please feel welcome - the last few weeks I've been struggling with trying to stay motivated too.
  • lncgurley
    lncgurley Posts: 37 Member
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    Hi Melissa!I just recently found my stride and would love to support you..friend me if you want. I lost 160lbs previously, didn't handle stress well, gained 60 back and am on my way back down. I know you can do this, and would love to encourae you and be encouraged by your enthusiasm!
  • ccckwalk
    ccckwalk Posts: 262
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    i love adding other mommies! I am a stay at home mom. I am on here everyday and would love to friend you. You can totally do this! Log your food, start burning some calories and have fun with it. We will keep doing things that we love doing. You love walking...walk it up. If you enjoy jumping jacks do a couple reps 5 times a day. Just find things that make you happy and do them as much as possible.
    I hope you have a great Monday~Corina
  • Angie_1991
    Angie_1991 Posts: 447 Member
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    You can do it....first of all...your diary is empty...don''t buy the junk food....friend me if you like.....
  • broomykm
    broomykm Posts: 31 Member
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    The mantra that I repeat to myself every morning when I get up, every time I am tempted to eat junk food, every time I am tempted to skip the treadmill...ONE DAY AT A TIME. This is today, I don't look past today very often, usually just once a week on weigh day. Today is so much easier to control. Today, I will stick to my calorie goals, today I will work out. I tell myself that if I have a good day today, tomorrow I can have a treat. Or if I have a bad day I keep telling myself it is only one day, one day doesn't undo everything. I can get back on track tomorrow. Controlling your life one day at a time makes it an achievable goal, and you will be surprised to find that one day down the road it will be easier and you will start to see the rewards and benefits. Good luck to you!
  • Barbellerella
    Barbellerella Posts: 1,838 Member
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    Just want to add in my2c. Its not necessary for you to eat every 2-3 hours for you to be successful. Sometimes eating all throughout the day can be a problem for people because you are always obsessing about food throughout the day. Just make sure to stick to your calorie goal for the day, and eat when your hungry.

    I also believe the protein goal MFP sets for you is too low for most people, especially if you are working out. You might want to consider changing your macro settings to something like 40/30/30 and see how you do with that.

    It sounds like you give yourself at lot of rules and plan a lot, but you are often setting yourself up for "failure" mentality when you don't stick to your rules and stray off your plan. How bout you simplify things this time, Just stick to your calorie goal, and try to get in some activity everyday. Its really as simple as that! Good luck to you.
  • maureen173
    maureen173 Posts: 27 Member
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    You can inbox me...I totally know how you're feeling! We could support each other.
  • sweetteacher123
    sweetteacher123 Posts: 178
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    You have great goals! I would try just adding one at a time. Start with exercise. Make the time to exercise five days a week for one month. Then add in the good eating. You will probably find after you make a habit of exercising, the healthy eating will be much easier. Don't overwhelm yourself at first. That's when people quit! You've already written the goals; that's the first step.
  • tinlee
    tinlee Posts: 60 Member
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    Start with one small goal that's pretty easy: Log every meal every day.

    Don't try to eat a perfect diet or workout for 2 hours. Just start logging your food. After a couple of weeks of just doing that you'll easily see your foods that are your problem areas and see how you can make small changes that you can live with.
  • kmee1959
    kmee1959 Posts: 6
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    Please don't over schedule yourself. With children, you have to be able to switch things up or you will just give up. I started with just logging my meals - realized that I didn't eat enough and was in starvation mode. Once I ate better (more) I felt better and the weight just started falling off. I started doing zumba with my daughter and I LOVE it. You need to start slow and increase as you feel able to - push yourself, but not too hard and increase when you feel like you can. You can do this and as you increase the time you spend on "you", you will feel different about you and realize that you deserve it! Bottom line, just keep moving and when you feel like you have to stop, do five more minutes....talk yourself through it. If you have an urge to eat something - wait 15 minutes and if you still have to have it - have it and don't beat yourself up about it! Chocolate is a favorite of mine and I do eat it, but realized that skinnycow has awesome chocolates ! Good luck and remember YOU ARE WORTH IT AND A HAPPY-HEALTHY MOMMY MAKES A HAPPY-HEALTHY FAMILY
  • mercymarque
    mercymarque Posts: 450
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    I'm not a stay at home mom... It's tough being a mom and finding a balance. My best advice and some of the things that have worked for me is planing. I plan my meals for the next day the day before. I enter them into the data base to see where I fall and where I can make adjustments. I eat small meals. An example of what I do follows. This works for me may not work for everyone

    glass of water before meal
    BREKFAST: fist size fruit usually an apple, pear or grapefruit
    small bowl of oatmeal or 2 egg whites or 1 egg omelet with veggies
    1 cup glass of grapefruit, apple or OJ
    glass of water during

    snack 150 cal or less (no cake, cookies or candy)

    Meal 2 Fruit smoothie, protein shake or small bowl of soup (no potatoes, no cream sauces) make sure sodium for either of the choices is no more than 480 mg per serving

    snack 100 cal or less

    meal 3 medium gard salad (only 3 tbsp of fat free dressing, no bacon bits or croutons)

    meal 4 5 oz chicken, fish or turkey (no frying) plus two serving of veggies

    snack 100 cal

    Drink plenty of water, log everything you put in your mouth, every seasoning you use, get your rest, and exercise.

    I hope this helps
  • amberecochran
    amberecochran Posts: 124 Member
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    Honey, honey, honey..... you are putiing entirely too much pressure on yourself! Best advice I can give anyone is start small and add as you go. I could plan plan plan all day long, but if I never do it or if something comes up (like a sick child or a migraine), then I may not be able to do what I planned. Take it one day at a time. With anything, really. Plan for the day, at first, and see how that works. I make a list everyday and check things off as I go. When the day is over and I haven't been able to do all of those things, I simply say I'll do it tomorrow. As far as meal planning goes.... I will purchase all the food I will need to prepare meals for the week but in reality, I don't always fix the meals I planned, that doesn't mean that the food I do fix isn't healthy. You can do this! If you can't get your workout in that day, take a walk that evening with your son. Be a little flexible. And, by all means, text, fb, or message me if you need encouragement or ideas. We all need someone to talk to, even if it's just an idea for dinner, you know?
  • amberecochran
    amberecochran Posts: 124 Member
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    The mantra that I repeat to myself every morning when I get up, every time I am tempted to eat junk food, every time I am tempted to skip the treadmill...ONE DAY AT A TIME. This is today, I don't look past today very often, usually just once a week on weigh day. Today is so much easier to control. Today, I will stick to my calorie goals, today I will work out. I tell myself that if I have a good day today, tomorrow I can have a treat. Or if I have a bad day I keep telling myself it is only one day, one day doesn't undo everything. I can get back on track tomorrow. Controlling your life one day at a time makes it an achievable goal, and you will be surprised to find that one day down the road it will be easier and you will start to see the rewards and benefits. Good luck to you!

    Exactly!!!!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    You need self discipline and a better idea of what youre getting into more than you need facebook friends that are also dieting.

    Taking control of your fate is not about getting a bunch of people to talk about it with, its about coming up with an educated plan and proving you can stick to it. Talking and supporting and leaning on each other is wonderful and nice- but this is something you have to realize that you are ultimately doing alone.

    We all are.

    Which is why is the greatest success we'll have. Cause we are proving to ourselves that we have what it takes to change our lives.

    START CHANGING IT NOW. Stop talking, actions speak louder than words!
  • Brianna72994
    Brianna72994 Posts: 887
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    I'm not a SAHM, but I am a stay at home sister, lol. I watch my 3 year old brother and 6 month old sister all day during the week, so I understand what you are talking about. Feel free to add me if you'd like
  • d_Mode
    d_Mode Posts: 880 Member
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    Stay-at-home-Dad with Type 2 diabetes. I know how you feel. I just take it day by day, one step at a time. I've found that making small goals helps.

    One a good note...it's been 2 years since I was diagnosed and I was finally able to get off my insulin, 3 weeks ago by making adjustments to my eating habits and through mild exercise.

    I'm on a 1700 calorie diet, although I pretty much eat what I want and just keep track of my carbs. I started out by taking my 20-month-old son and dachshund Mia, for walk around the neighborhood. Now that the weather is getting cool I hit the gym.

    Good luck!
  • cathomer
    cathomer Posts: 88
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    I have the exact same problem, it's so hard, the stress eating is really bad, and just not really having anything to keep you focussed, every day just seems like a blur.

    You can do it though, put up motivational quotes in your kitchen, reminders to drink more water etc.

    See if you can find some local people to go running with, that's what I did, put a notice on a web board and had two people reply, now there are 6 of us who running regularly. I haven't been so good at going lately, but I'm back out tonight and hope to carry on.

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