My boyfriend is TOO SKINNY. Help!!

bms34b
bms34b Posts: 401 Member
edited January 5 in Health and Weight Loss
Here's the deal. I need some advice for what to do with my boyfriend - he's always been SKINNY, but with some recent added stress, he has dropped from about 130 to 122. (He's 5'10" and 22.)

I'm maintaining/losing very slowly and I'm happy with that, and since I often cook for both of us and also do the grocery shopping (we live together) I'm worried that I'm not doing something I could be to help him maintain a healthy weight. Usually I make eggs and toast for breakfast with bacon sometimes, pack a lunch of about 800 calories, and we make dinner together that's a high protein dinner.

He doesn't work out. He's a full time student and he has a part time job, and he also is a French Horn major auditioning for graduate programs, so he's practicing in every ounce of spare time he has.

What can I do? Should I try to get him to go to the doctor? Is it that severe? He doesn't think it's a problem.
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Replies

  • Nerdy_Rose
    Nerdy_Rose Posts: 1,277 Member
    Feed him peanut butter and full-fat dairy? I think he should probably see a doctor to rule out other problems. My ex was 145 lbs at 6'4" from an undiagnosed medical problem a few years ago.
  • Dub_D
    Dub_D Posts: 1,760 Member
    Just break up.
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    Feed him peanut butter and full-fat dairy?

    That's what I do on days I have long runs and don't feel like eating 4000 calories. You need calorie dense foods. Peanut butter, almonds, full fat dairy milk/cheese are just some but those are really good places to start. Most people love these foods.
  • iWaffle
    iWaffle Posts: 2,208 Member
    Just break up.

    Someone had to say it right?
  • MurphysLawTD
    MurphysLawTD Posts: 310 Member
    Has he ever complained of any stomach issues? He may have a digestive issue or intolerance to something and not even know it. Could also be a malabsorption issue, definitely things to have checked out!
  • EatingRight123
    EatingRight123 Posts: 29
    3 double cheeseburger, 3 junior chicken, double bigmac combo with large fries and nondiet drink + large mcdonalds milkshake.
  • BritneysStuntDouble
    BritneysStuntDouble Posts: 849 Member
    I saw an infomercial the other night that claimed to help guys gain girth. You just take a pill. It was on Spike channel, I think, around 3am. I'll keep my eyes peeled for it, and let you know. Good luck!
  • DanaDark
    DanaDark Posts: 2,187 Member
    Not eating enough. Plain and simple.

    Solution: eat more.

    In the case where a person does not feel the need to eat more, they should choose higher calorie alternatives. Whole milk instead of skim milk for example, or whole eggs instead of egg whites.

    Tell him no sex till he's 140. He'll make it happen.
  • newcs
    newcs Posts: 717 Member
    I'd also say get him to see a doctor to rule out more serious issues. If it's just a calorie deficit and he can't eat enough to sustain his weight, look into meal replacement powders that he can make shakes with. My girlfriend has a similar issue and she uses those because she flat out gets sick of eating.
  • ilovedeadlifts
    ilovedeadlifts Posts: 2,923 Member
    throw his razors out. not shaving should lead him to realize he's a man and should be striving to weight about 200 pounds for his height.
    buy him the 5/3/1 ebook and a gym membership.
    load him up on chocolate milk.

    but seriously get him into lifting and make him eat
  • FitBeto
    FitBeto Posts: 2,121 Member
    Cover yourself in chocolate. LOTS OF CHOCOLATE.
  • mustgetmuscles1
    mustgetmuscles1 Posts: 3,346 Member
    I dont normally like those mass gainer shakes but they are useful for people who just cant seem to get enough calories from regular eating. See if he is interested in those.
  • grawrrrr
    grawrrrr Posts: 336
    I saw an infomercial the other night that claimed to help guys gain girth. You just take a pill. It was on Spike channel, I think, around 3am. I'll keep my eyes peeled for it, and let you know. Good luck!

    Rofl.
  • secretlobster
    secretlobster Posts: 3,566 Member
    "He doesn't think it's a problem."

    Then no "eat more" solution is going to help. This is the part that you don't get to control. You don't get to "feed him" if he doesn't want to eat. You can express your concern to him but you can't make a doctor's appointment for him.

    I think offering calorie dense foods is a good idea and also to continue letting him know your concern. But beyond that he's a human being who makes his own choices...
  • fishgutzy
    fishgutzy Posts: 2,807 Member
    Nuts are great for concentrated healthy calories. Nearly 200 per ounce. But balanced with other sources because too much can cause painful intestinal blocks.

    Large Meat Lover's Pizza with Extra cheese is good too :)
  • Lift_This_
    Lift_This_ Posts: 2,756 Member
    Just break up.

    pretty legit answer to all of life's toughest questions.
  • purplegoboom
    purplegoboom Posts: 400 Member
    I saw an infomercial the other night that claimed to help guys gain girth. You just take a pill. It was on Spike channel, I think, around 3am. I'll keep my eyes peeled for it, and let you know. Good luck!

    :laugh:
  • RunMyOregonBunsOff
    RunMyOregonBunsOff Posts: 862 Member
    Maybe try to get him to drink something like boost or slimfast (meal replacement) drinks as a snack in addition to what he is already eating. Also, try cooking with olive oil and adding nuts and other healthy fats to his diet. Clif mojo bars are great too.
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    I've threatened to hook the BF up to a butter and lard IV, I also regularly joke about adding extra oil and butter into his dinner (which I don't, but am heavily contemplating). I strongly encourage ice cream and extra treats. He needs the calories, his medicine caused him to lose almost 50lbs. He's not unhealthy, just super skinny.
  • now_or_never12
    now_or_never12 Posts: 849 Member
    Pack things like nuts for snacks for him. For small amounts they pack a lot of calories.

    If you are the main one doing the cooking maybe cook something extra that is higher calories for him. Serve him a lot more of what you cook. Cook higher calorie side dishes and plate him a large serving. Things like potatoes with the fixings, cream sauces for meats, high cal salad dressings with oils, etc can help. There are tons of ways to sneak in extra calories for him to have.

    Something simple as packing him a container of cashews, walnuts, peanuts, etc (if neither of you are allergic) can add an extra 500 plus calories a day if he eats them for a very small amount of calories.
  • Mary067
    Mary067 Posts: 31
    You said that he is going through some stress right now, I think thats probably it. When I went through my divorce, I lost 6o pounds just due to stress. I gained it back though cuz when I was feeling better I was able to eat again and the adenilan fron being stressed had gone away. I think that the other posters that suggested full fat foods is a good place to start. I think its just stress and thats how his body is handling it.
  • Chief_Rocka
    Chief_Rocka Posts: 4,710 Member
    Delay dinner until after 6pm, and make sure he eats carbs. He'll never suspect a thing.
  • CynthiaCollin
    CynthiaCollin Posts: 406 Member
    That is not alot of weight for a guy his height. He must have a thin frame.... Is he eating regularly? 3 meals a day plus snacks? If he isn`t eating I would be concerned. If he is eating alot and losing weight that could be a health issue to talk to a doctor. Maybe he has a hyperthyroid problem? That would explain eating and still losing weight...+ stress.... My brother in law has a fast thyroid....no matter what he eats he`ll never gain an ounce.... Protein shakes could help....throw in some whole milk and some frozen fruit....that could possibly add more calories to his day on top of his meals.

    You are a great girlfriend for caring !
  • bridgelene
    bridgelene Posts: 358 Member
    This.
  • keem88
    keem88 Posts: 1,689 Member
    try and get some full fat foods in him, and maybe try and encourage him to go to the doctor. there may be something wrong and you don't want it to get severe
  • libbymcbain
    libbymcbain Posts: 206 Member
    Think going to the doctor to check it is a good idea.

    My husband is similar but less extreme- 5'11", goes between 162 and 168, would love to be 170.

    When we first got together I baked for him loads and he did gain a bit (but this was eating homemade baking 5 times a day- breakfast fruit loaf, mid morning snack cheese scone, lunchtime a brownie, afternoon snack a muffin, dinner a pudding like sticky toffee or something). I don't do all that anymore- fruit loaf for breakfast and something else for a snack once a day.

    Then he decided he wanted to put on some muscle and go to the gym as he had put on a little fat. Now he does that and he is building muscle- and that has been by upping his protein. So a glass of milk at breakfast as well as a glass of juice, greek yogurt and oats added to the fruit loaf, nut butter on the fruit loaf not fruit spread or jam, bit of cheese with his mid morning apple, proper meal at lunchtime most days with decent portion of protein (rather than a slice of ham in a sandwich, if it has to be sandwiches then the whole packet of ham not a slice), nuts to snack on, peanut butter with a banana, bigger protein portion at dinner time, pulses as well as carbs like rice.

    He's putting in a an extra 30-40g of protein a day and it's really working. He has a six pack now and his body fat is about 12-13%, but he is a few pounds heavier than he was and is way more muscular.

    Which has it's benefits it must be said.
  • ilovemybuggy
    ilovemybuggy Posts: 1,584 Member
    Just break up.

    I knew as soon as I saw this post that YOU would say THIS. lol I'm always ready for it.
  • MikeInAZ
    MikeInAZ Posts: 483 Member
    Look up a show on YouTube called Super Size vs Super Skinny. It's a British show. It's got a lot of good info for under eaters. He can watch it and hopefully start to understand that he's not being healthy.
  • beandawgy
    beandawgy Posts: 92
    Is it sad that I know the informercial @SandwichFarti is talking about? I was watching the Ink Master marathon on Spike this past weekend.
  • BarackMeLikeAHurricane
    BarackMeLikeAHurricane Posts: 3,400 Member
    My boyfriend has the same problem. He's not very active and he eats 4000-6000 calories a day (I make his food so sometimes I'll count just for fun) but he's rail thin. He gets this super carb drink from vitamin shoppe and it's 960 calories a bottle. Get him on those.
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